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"They're eating her. And then they're going to eat me. OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD."
Troll 2 (originally titled Goblins) is a 1990 In Name Only sequel to the 1986 B-movie, Troll. Note that throughout the movie, not a single troll appears in the film, nor is the word "troll" spoken once. There are two different films called Troll 3, and neither have much to do with either Troll or Troll 2.Here's the movie in a nutshell:The Waits family goes to a village called Nilbog, who are unaware that the townsfolk are actually trollsgoblins; specifically, 'vegetarians', who would try to get their vic... guests, to eat their all-vegetable food, which would turn their victims into a "half man, half plant" troll goblin food. It is up to the Waits' son, Joshua, who can communicate with his dead grandpa, Seth, to save his family from the trollsgoblins before his family becomes trollGoblin Chow.Troll 2 has been dubbed the "Best Worst Movie Ever Made" by its fans and has gained a cult following over the years. Little Joshua grew up and made a documentary about the movie and its fan base.A planned sequel titled Troll 2, Part 2 is currently in Development Hell due to lack of funding.
More like "All Troll Movies Are Different." The only real connection between the three "primary" Troll movies is a weird focus upon plants; Troll 1's troll turned people into plant-pods to spawn more trolls, Troll 2's goblins turn humans to plants (and then eat those plants), and Troll 3 (the one also called "Creepers") was about killer radioactive tree roots.
And I Must Scream: Arnold is unable to move or speak when he is turned into a plant until the bark is pulled off his face. Rather than trying to dig him out of the planter his feet are stuck in, his friend decides to just try to drag the planter to safety.
Aside Glance: Credence does a very slooooow and overdramatic one of these.
As You Know: When Mrs. Waits is talking to Joshua at the beginning, she feels to need to mention that Grandpa Seth was her father.note Though it is possible Seth was the father's dad.
Awesome McCoolname: Credence Leonore Gielgud (of ancient Druid origins!). Her ancestors came from Stonehenge!
Sheriff Gene Freak.
Badass Grandpa: Being dead doesn't stop Grandpa from stopping time, throwing lightning bolts, chopping goblins up with an axe or making molotov cocktails.
Baleful Polymorph: Arnold becomes part-plant. He still maintains most of his human properties, even if his abilities as a human becomes limited, like bark growing over his mouth and his legs grown stuck into a plant pot, but he definitely still has enough human traits to be able to be aware of his surroundings, and once the bark covering his mouth is removed, speak. It's pretty hilarious to see him being pulled out from the house stiff as a stick by the pot.
Comically Missing the Point: The trollsgoblins themselves, who claim to be vegetarians despite the fact that they apparently feed by killing and eating animals - the human animal, specifically. One exchange implies that he real reason why they don't eat meat is because they're incapable of digesting it (which suggests a more appropriate term would be "herbivore"), rather than any ethical concerns. Of course, since the film was designed to be a Take That against vegetarians, it does undermine that intention quite severely, since only a tiny minority of vegetarians stay off of meat because of health reasons rather than ethical ones. On the other hand, the sermon their minister gives seems to imply they find carnivory somewhat abhorrent, which seems to be indicative of an extreme case of Blue and Orange Morality.
Vegetarians are evil. Rossella Drudi (the woman who wrote the script, and director Claudio Fergasso's wife) apparently got the idea by being annoyed at how many of her friends had recently become vocally vegetarian. Take that as you will.
If you want to have sex get rid of your friends. There's a really weird idea running through the movie that Elliot and Holly can only be happy - and her family will only accept him - if he breaks all other ties to everyone else in the world. The intention was probably just that everyone thinks his friends are morons and he's better off without them (which is true), but this is very poorly conveyed to the audience.
Fantastic Aesop: Only the power of goodness can defeat the goblins. Of course, a double decker baloney sandwich always helps.
Our Ghosts Are Different: Grandpa Seth, as noted above, doesn't seem to obey any particular rules as to what he can do or how he can appear in the mortal realm. He can shoot lightning, stop time, appear corporeal or incorporeal and bring back various weapons from the afterlife, including an axe and a molotov cocktail. Really, he could just kill all the goblins himself.
Planimal: The goblins turn people into edible plantmen, because they are vegetarians.
Plot Hole: Unsurprisingly there are several, mostly in regards to characters having information they shouldn't have or going places they should have no reason to go to. For instance, why did Joshua wander into the barn where the sermon was being held?
A minor one is that fairly early on, Grandpa Seth tells Joshua that Nilbog is "the kingdom of the goblins". A few scenes later, Joshua is astounded to realize 'Nilbog' is 'goblin' spelled backwards, and that, therefore, "this is their kingdom!"
Real Life Writes the Plot: Don Packard's performance as the demented, creepy, slightly schizophrenic store owner? Yeah... at the time of this "performance", Don Packard was living at an insane asylum, being treated for schizophrenia. He was on a day pass when he was found by the producers, cast in the part, and filmed all his lines all in one afternoon... and then he returned to the asylum to continue his treatment. Packard himself says of his performance, "That's not me acting... I was really that crazy." He was also, by his own admission, baked out of his mind. He has since been able to control his schizophrenia through medication.
Thematic Series: The Troll series is actually a series of unrelated movies that were never meant to be sequels. After the first film, this movie was made with the original, and more appropriate name, Goblins. It was given the name Troll 2 in hopes of making more money. As noted above, two different movies were released as Troll 3 (along with their original titles) and neither had anything to do with trolls or the first movie. The only themes here seems to be that they were originally unrelated movies and they're usually considered to be terrible.
There's No "B" in Movie: The guys are all sitting around watching a movie about a crystal-stealing gorilla with rocket powers. Apparently, this is a real film.
Veganopia: Subverted in that this probably the first ever depiction of an outright evil vegan society.
Weaksauce Weakness: Double decker baloney sandwiches are not an impressive weakness for the Goblins to have.
Weirdness Censor: Everyone from out of town (except Joshua, and that's probably only because he was forewarned) seems to believe the patently bizarre mannerisms of the townsfolk is folksiness.
What Happened to the Mouse?: Brent and Drew both disappear abruptly from the film without explanation. It's implied that the goblins ate Drew, after he ate a sandwich from Sheriff Gene Freak (yes, that's his name), drank a bit of Nilbog milk ("High in vitamin content!") and then was presumably forcefed a milkshake made of Arnold. Brent was supposed to be transformed into popcorn, but it was so badly executed it just looked like he had some very weird sex and then goes to sleep.
You Keep Using That Word: The goblins are supposedly 'vegetarians'...who, rather than, say, growing plants and eating them, turn people into plant-things and then eat them. How this is different from just eating meat is never really explained. Presumably, they're vegetarians for health reasons, not ethical ones. Once a person is turned enough toward being a plant, they can be healthily consumed, apparently. Must be less cholesterol. Or they're oathbound against consuming flesh. But for magical, possibly-fey creatures, health concerns and oathbinding might not be so different.