Film: The Kid (2000)
So, I'm forty, I'm not married, I don't fly jets, and I don't have a dog? I grow up to be a loser!Disney’s The Kid is a 2000 film starring Bruce Willis, Emily Mortimer, and Spencer Breslin.40-year-old Russ Duritz is a successful image consultant with a variety of clients ranging from TV personalities, to famous athletes to government officials. He has a nice car, a large house, everything you could ask for except a life. He’s also a bit of a jerk.One day he finds a kid who somehow got into his house and makes a startling discovery. This kid is Rusty Duritz, himself at age 8. Now he has to figure out what to do with…himself while starting to remember a few things that he had forgotten about himself.Not to be confused with The Kid (1921), which stars Charlie Chaplin.
This film contains examples of:
- Boxing Lesson: In an effort to toughen himself against bullies, Russ gets his boxer friend to teach Rusty. After the boxer learns it's for bullies he says "He doesn't need boxing, he needs to learn street fighting."
- Brick Joke: When Rusty sees a large orange moon, he becomes very excited and wonders what makes it turn that color. At the very end, right before the credits start rolling, it explains why the moon sometimes appears orange.
- Character Tic: Russ's eye twitch. The result of his dad rubbing the tears off his eyes too hard when he won't stop crying.
- Deadpan Snarker: Most of the characters have their moments, but Janet especially stands out.
- Demoted to Extra: Jeri Ryan originally had a supporting role in this film as one of Russ' clients, and there would have been a minor Romantic Plot Tumor later in the film involving her character, where she starts hitting on Russ, and making Amy jealous. In the final cut however, Ryan's role was obliterated completely, and now she only has a small cameo on Russ' television being interviewed.
- Fat Idiot: Rusty, at least to Russ' view.
- Future Me Scares Me: Rusty is very disappointed by what Russ has become.
- Getting Crap Past the Radar: When she thinks Rusty is Russ' son and she speculates about his mother, Amy concludes with "not that I care who — or what — you do!"
- Help Yourself in the Future: Seems to be why Rusty is there. Then it turns out that they’re both being helped by Russ from thirty years in the future.
- Like his psychiatrist said, Russ is having these "hallucinations" for a reason.
- I Hate Past Me: Russ can't stand Rusty's presence because it reminds him of things he doesn't want to remember.
- Jacob Marley Warning: Inverted as the Marley is actually the main character.
- Jerk with a Heart of Gold: Russ, eventually.
- Love Epiphany: When Russ realizes he's been paying a lot more attention to Amy than he realized.
- Married in the Future: Russ and Amy
- Our Time Travel Is Different: It…never actually says how it happens. Old Russ just seems to will it.
- Playground Song: At one point Rusty keeps singing "John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt".
- Pursue the Dream Job: “We grow up to be pilots!”
- Reality Ensues: Rusty is able to beat the bullies and save the three-legged dog, Tripod, from a cruel fate. Cue cheering and Awesome Music. Not so fast. Not only is Rusty hauled into the principal's office; once he gets home, his father, quite cruelly, tells him that his mother is dying and accuses Rusty of trying to kill her faster.
- Running Gag: Russ and Rusty keep having to go to the bathroom at the same time.
- Sassy Secretary: Janet
- We Used to Be Friends: Rusty had a best friend until he joined some bullies. After the fight, the former friend starts picking on Rusty until high school graduation.
- You Keep Using That Word: When she thinks Rusty is Russ' son, Amy accuses him of being a deadbeat dad who has visitation rights. Deadbeat dads (absentee fathers who don't pay child support) aren't exactly in a position to exercise visitation rights. Justified by the fact that Amy isn't exactly calm at the time.