came out in 1985 as a fun, relatively harmless comedy film, but it mostly catered to boys. Why not have a version that approached the other market
? But we obviously can't have a teen girl running around as a beastly werewolf. So let's make her a Cute Witch
, instead!Teen Witch
is a 1989 film that began life as the above scenario, but eventually diverged enough during production to gain an identity of its own. It's the story of Louise Miller, a shy high school student, who one night discovers — with the help of a Fortune Teller
, Madame Serena — that she is a reincarnated witch whose powers will manifest on her (Not So) Dangerous Sixteenth Birthday
. Serena then provides Louise with a Spell Book
to practice her powers. With them, she hopes to overcome her unpopularity, date the guy of her dreams, and maybe even help out her friends with their own problems. But is it all worth it in the end?The Nostalgia Chick
reviewed the film here
This movie contains examples of:
- Actor Allusion: Dick Sargent as Louise's dad.
- Alpha Bitch: Almost all of the cheerleaders.
- Annoying Younger Sibling: Louise's brother...
- Baleful Polymorph: Louise accidentally turns her brother into a dog. Via a case of "I'm rubber, you're glue".
- Big Man on Campus: Brad.
- Boastful Rap: By a trio of white boys, no less. Top that!
- Cannot Tell a Lie: The cheerleaders' payback.
- Disproportionate Retribution: Talking in class is rude, yes. But that doesn't justify reading a teenage girl's diary aloud in class to humiliate her in front of her peers.
- The Eighties: Ohhhh, yes.
- Elemental Powers: The very first spells Louise tries, affect the weather, bringing rain and winds.
- Exact Words: Louise's powers tend to manifest very literally. There's the above trope, and later, she uses the classic theater luck-wishing phrase "Break a leg" to her friend Kiki.
- Familiar: An interesting case, because it's an object rather than an animal. Louise is given an ancient medallion by her theater arts teacher which Serena tells her is a symbol of her powers which will follow her through each lifetime.
- Have I Mentioned I Am Heterosexual Today?: The "I Like Boys" song the cheerleaders sing.
- Hidden Depths: After Mr. Weaver humiliates Louise, Kiki can be seen glaring at him, indicating she's not such an Alpha Bitch after all and can sympathize with Louise.
- Hollywood Nerd: Louise's first date is a virtual duplicate of Buddy Holly.
Nostalgia Chick: Oh my god, he's got glasses!
- Humiliation Conga: What's some of the first things for which Louise uses her magic? Getting back at her teachers and classmates, of course.
- Hurricane of Euphemisms / Long List: During a sex education class:
Teacher: Can anyone tell me what this might represent? <holds up a closed umbrella>
Student: A roger, a love wand, joystick, dong, zipper lizard, tallywhacker, trouser snake, schlong—
- I Just Want to Be Special
- IKEA Erotica: "He pressed his lips against mine, but he didn't stop there. Soon, every inch of my body was covered with Brad's kisses. Who would believe tonight, I was totally his."
- Kryptonite Factor: Water reverses the effects of Louise's spells.
- Left the Background Music On/Diegetic Switch: A strange combination. After the popularity spell, Louise starts to step outside, but suddenly hears a bass beat start up in the soundtrack and shuts the door in surprise, making the song stop. She then shrugs it off and continues outside, and the song resumes.
- Love Potion: Louise initially wants to get Brad this way, but she can't bring herself to force him to love her.
- No Antagonist
- No Celebrities Were Harmed: In-universe pop star Shana is basically Madonna.
- Somewhat averted in that she was played by real-life Madonna-esque pop singer Cindy Valentine, who also co-wrote several songs for the soundtrack.
- Pretty Fly for a White Guy: The aforementioned trio of white rappers. Period, exclamation mark, full stop.
- Puberty Superpower: Provides the page quote.
- Sadist Teacher: Mr. Weaver delights in embarrassing his students.
- She Cleans Up Nicely: Louise post-popularity spell.
- Single Girl Seeks Most Popular Guy
- Unintentional Period Piece
- Voodoo Doll: Mr. Weaver's payback.
- We Used to Be Friends: As Louise moves up in popularity, she leaves aside her old friend Polly, who naturally resents this treatment.
- Wish Fulfillment: Aesop? What Aesop?
- With Great Power Comes Great Perks