BASEketball is a 1998 comedy film telling the story of two unemployed losers (South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone) who invent a game combining baseball and basketball, but requiring no real athletic skills. The game rapidly evolves in popularity becoming an actual professional sport.Based on an actual game created by Airplane! co-creator David Zucker.
Teams included, but not limited to, in the National Baseketball League (NBL)
Going in order of film appearance, all of the teams listed represent and/or parody stereotypes and include references to their respective areas.
- Milwaukee Beers: The team our protagonists play on referencing to the numerous local beer breweries and the Milwaukee Brewers baseball team. The fans wear beer mug "foam heads" (a spoof of the "Cheese Heads" worn by Green Bay Packers' fans) and perform "the chug" (similar to the "tomahawk chop" used by the Florida State Seminoles and Atlanta Braves). Their mascot is a walking keg of beer (who can use his "tap" to urinate). The cheerleaders wear highly revealing attire ranging from short shorts to lingerie. Beers Garden, the team's home arena, features a neon sign animation of a man chugging beer and then vomiting immediately after.
- Dallas Felons: Huge muscle types who are probably ex-convicts (a reference to numerous players on the Dallas Cowboys who had major legal problems in the mid-1990s). Their owner, Baxter Cain (Vaughn) is based on Cowboys owner Jerry Jones. The team has cheerleaders dressed in black leather dominatrix outfits.
- Miami Dealers: The players appear to be Hispanic drug dealers (note their logo is a chainsaw-wielding man reminiscent of Scarface). One of the players ran away when Coop performed a psyche-out wearing a DEA jacket with the logo facing him.
- New Jersey Informants: The players are Italian-American Joisey stereotypes (one of their failed psyche-outs was "Your mother's a terrible cook"); their cheerleaders all have perms and also perform some Italian hand gestures. Features Greg Grunberg, of subsequent Heroes fame.
- San Francisco Ferries: Homosexuals; referencing San Francisco's status as one of America's most popular LGBT meccas. The players wear white and pastel pink uniforms, and have the only all-male cheerleader squad in the league. The word "Ferries", referring to ferry boats, is also a play on "fairy", a slur towards gay men.
- San Antonio Defenders: Rednecks; their home field includes a giant recreation of the Alamo Mission in San Antonio, Texas (which they, as Texans, would defend). The cheerleaders all wear Davy Crockett coonskin caps and cowgirl thong two-pieces.
- Detroit Lemons: Reference to the home of American auto makers as well as the slang term often given to defective automobiles (their team logo is a lemon with wheels).
- Roswell Aliens: Reference to the Roswell Incident where a UFO supposedly crashed in a location in Roswell, New Mexico in 1947 and the surrounding conspiracy theories that developed thereafter. The team has an grey alien mascot, an arena shaped to look like a flying saucer, an Area 51-themed backboard, as well as an "Anal Probe Night" promotion.
- L.A. Riots: Reference to the 1992 Los Angeles/Rodney King riots and, possibly, the 1965 Watts Riots; the players appear to be mostly Latinos and African-Americans. Their cheerleaders perform on stripper poles.
This movie provides examples of:
- Affectionate Parody: Of inspirational sports movies.
- Analogy Backfire:Cain: But until we allow teams to move cities and players to change teams, and take advantage of lucrative corporate tie-ins, I'm afraid you and your colleagues are gonna have to continue working for... [Cain reaches down where a chicken is eating some feed]Coop: [looks at Cain's hand] Chicken poo?Cain: Ugh! Feed. Chicken feed.
- Arc Words:Coop: One day, I'm gonna be a big sports star!
- Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking:"Continued expansion diluted the talent pool, forcing [sports team] owners to recruit heavily from forcing prisons, mental institutions, and Texas".
- Artifact Title: In-universe, in the opening narration, describing professional sports teams who have moved to other markets:"The Minneapolis Lakers moved to Los Angeles, where there are no lakes. The Houston Oilers moved to Tennessee, where there is no oil. The New Orleans Jazz moved to Salt Lake City, where they don't allow music."
- Artistic License History: Reggie Jackson's third home run ball (The one Coop caught) was famously hit into an empty set of bleachers.
- As Himself: A dozen people, notably Bob Costas and Al Michaels, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Victoria Silvstedt (Playmate of the Year), Dale Earnhardt, and Reggie Jackson.
- Ask a Stupid Question...: Denslow's will involves an obviously rhetorical question, to which Coop responds.
- Attention Deficit... Ooh, Shiny!: RemerDenslow: People today have attention spans that can only be measured in nanoseconds!
[Coop looks over to see Remer staring at a bird]
Coop: I hear you.
- Author Catchphrase: Early appearances of "Derp," which later appeared in South Park
- Awesome, but Impractical: Many of the psyche-outs require lots of planning, and even some props. Each psyche-out can be used only once, or it loses its shock value.
- Benevolent Boss: Ted Denslow.
- The Big Damn Kiss: Parodied with Coop and Remer.
- Book Ends: We open with a narrator talking about about the majesty of sportsmanship in it's decline and we close with that same narrator.
- Both Sides Have a Point: Played with between Coop's control over the NBL and Remer wanting more from this.Remer Dude, quit thinking about yourself for a change!
Coop Dude, I'm not gonna cave in! End of story, dude!
Remer: DUDE!! [Coop is aghast] Dude.
Coop: [speechless] I guess you got a point there.
- Bread, Eggs, Milk, Squick:Coop: He goes home, does some push-ups, fucks the sleeve of his favorite jacket...
- Brick Joke: Road Kill: Caught on Tape.
- Butt-Monkey: Poor Squeak.
- Calvinball: Coop and Remer originally make the rules up as they go along to beat the two guys at the party. From there it mutates into an actual sport.
- The playoff format, after the NBL expands.
- Camp Gay: The San Francisco Ferries, team and fans alike.
- Captain Obvious:Bob Costas: And so it all comes down to this; one shot. Coop makes it? the Beers win the cup and get to keep the team.
Al Michaels: Or he misses!
(Bob looks at him weird)
- Chekhov's Gag:"Hey, I heard your (female relative)'s going out with Squeak!"
- Chew Toy: Squeak, again.
- Cloud Cuckoo Lander: Remer
- Coincidental Broadcast: Coop listening to the radio:Look out ahead, there's a truck changing lanes
And you've got some yellow crumbs on your upper lip...
- Comically Missing the Point: Joey's first wishes include big game hunting a bald eagle or a giant panda, before choosing poisoning a reservoir and throwing flesh-eating fish into a public swimming pool.
- Also, Squeak with his admiring fan. She can't be a dude - she's got the cutest little Adam's apple!
- Remer thinks he has to quit BASEketball to get rich.
- This happens every time Cain meets with Coop and/or Remer. He'll discuss his ideas regarding lucrative opportunities, but they'll greatly misinterpret what's Cain is talking about much to his chagrin.
- Distracted by the Sexy: Al Michaels seems to be really fond of the Beers cheerleaders.Bob Costas: Hard to believe that just five years ago, this game was played only on driveways
Al Michaels: And it's hard to believe just five years ago, those girls were only in grade school.
Bob Costas: [speechless]
- Dirty Old Man: Denslow reveals he's this in his video will.
- Doing It for the Art: In-universe example. Coop's philosophy while building the NBL; He wants to create an environment where passion for the sport, not franchising, is the main motivating factor for the players. After Coop was given ownership of the sport by Denslow's will, he makes sure it stays that way. Unfortunately, Coop is so determined to keep the sport from becoming commercialized that he soon becomes obsessed with control over it.Coop: This is not about the money. It's about tradition. Look, think about the greats who have played this game. It's because of them. It's because of us, that I can't bow down to a guy like Cain.
Remer: Dude, that's easy for you to say! You got the team, we got jack-shit!
- Everyone Calls Him "Barkeep": Squeak. His real first name is Kenny, but his teammates use his nickname so exclusively that it's assumed to be his given name.
- It gets even better when everyone is referred to by full name and nickname and we get to "Squeak 'Little Bitch' Scolari."
- Evil Cannot Comprehend Good: Cain doesn't understand why a fellow rich man like Denslow wouldn't want to commercialize baseketball and make even more money.
- Face Fault: Common result of the psyche-outs.
- Fanservice: Any Baseketball cheerleader from any team (in-universe and out). They're practically half-naked most of the time.
- Faux Yay: Coop and Remer have a full-on snog session toward the end of the film.
- Fictional Sport
- Fingore: One psyche-out has Coop flip off the opposing player, slowly creep a pair of wire-cutters towards his finger and tear it off. It's a fake, but still...
- Freudian Slippery Slope: Jenna after seeing Coop and Remer naked in the locker room.This is going to be the end of the foundation; it's not endowed like- [beat] well, like- [...] Enough! Look at yourselves! You're just typical men with humongous... egos. You're like every other pro-athlete, I should have kept those kids away from you, now their little lives are ruined and all you can do is argue over who is the bigger penis- I mean child. [sigh] Long wanger. [gasp] Throbbing cock. [screams]
- Full-Name Basis: "Victoria Silvstedt, Playmate of the Year!"
- Funny Background Event: The movie is full of them. (It is a David Zucker film, after all.)
- Gag Penis: Coop and Remer in the locker room with Jenna. They are as long as the legs they hang between.
- Gold Digger: Yvette is all but stated to have been this. After Denslow leaves the team to Coop, she laments that she gave him "the best three weeks of her life". After hearing Squeak's speech, she may no longer be this.
- Happy Dance: Inverted, Coop does his happy dance whenever he's pissed off, with varying results.
- Hero-Worshipper: Coop is one to Reggie Jackson. In turn, Joey is to Coop.
- Humble Beginnings/Memetic Mutation: In-universe. Baseketball was made up on the spot by Coop and Remer one night. Soon it was being played on suburban neighborhood driveways and even went as far as developing entire amateur leagues within neighborhoods. With the support and financial sponsorship of a billionaire fan and a growing fan base, it became a professional league sport. As a nod to this, many baseketball arenas have backboard facades the resemble garage doors each themed to the arena's home team.Bob Costas: Hard to believe that just five years ago, this game was played only on driveways.
- I Take Offense to That Last One!: Remer was offended when Coop tells him he doesn't really care about Jenna just because he was in the hot tub with Victoria Silvstedt, "Playmate of the Year!".Remer: That hurts, man! That really hurts! My clothing line is singlehandedly saving Jenna's foundation!
Coup: Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot how much Doug Remer cares about kids.
- Ill Show You X: After Squeak acts professionally at his job.Remer: Dude, does it just suck being you?
Squeak: (mutters) I'll show those guys what sucks.
- If I Had a Nickel:"If I had a nickel for every time this ball's gotten me out of a tight spot, I'd have a shitload of nickels!"
- Instant Sedation: For one of his psyche-outs Remer plays a droning, monotonous book-on-tape in a player's ear, lulling him to sleep in seconds.
- Lampshade Hanging: Coop (Trey Parker) to Remer (Matt Stone):"Oh, now you're such a big shot, you're gonna act in a Hollywood movie? Fuckin' sellout." [awkward pause]
- Littlest Cancer Patient: Joey. Actually, it's liver recipient to be precise, but this still applies.
- Meaningful Echo: The Beers win the final championship game using the exact same play that they won the driveway league championship with at the beginning, complete with identical commentating from the announcers.
- Moment Killer: Remer barges into Coop's apartment in Kramer fashion just as he and Jenna are about to kiss.Remer: Hey Coop, check out all this cool shit we got in the hospital!
- Never My Fault: After the Big Bad blackmails them into forfeiting the Denslow Cup, Remer blames the entire mess on Coop because he wouldn't share control of the NBL and for saying no to Cain's first proposition (thus forcing Cain to take drastic measures in order to change Coop's mind). When Jenna comes down to tell them they've destroyed her foundation, Remer quickly pins the blame on Coop.Coop: Jenna, I can explain...
Remer: Yes, it was his fault.
Remer: You gotta believe me, it's all Coop's fault!
Remer: Thanks for coming back, you really made a big difference in the game.
- After the Beers are starting to lose the Denslow Cup, resulting in a fight:
Coop: Dude, if I haven't been cleaning up your mess, I wouldn't be jet-lagging, shitting curry!
- Oh, Crap!:
- Coop and Remer, when Cain tells them he's blackmailing them.
- Britney's boyfriend Ted, when Coop and Remer tells her he told them about her party. Though his expression is more subdued.
- Only Sane Man: Despite being the movie's villain, Baxter Cain is this, mainly because all the heroes (and some of the supporting characters) are complete morons.
- Also Jenna, due to watching over the "health-challenged and survival-impaired" kids and keeping them away from bad influences.
- Opposing Sports Team/The Rival: The Dallas Felons.
- Pair the Spares: Remer and Yvette, despite meeting only once before. They were lonely because everyone else was paired.
- Plot-Mandated Friendship Failure: True to form, Coop and Remer have a huge falling out over Coop's refusal to let baseketball be commercialized, as well as their rivalry over Jenna. Which gets worse when they're being blackmailed and then they blame each other.
- "The Reason You Suck" Speech: After infighting between Coop and Remer threatens their shot at winning the championship game, Squeak delivers one to them at halftime while dressed as a pineapple.
- Right Behind Me: At the house party near the beginning of the movie, Brittany is standing right behind Remer when he tells Coop how much he wants to have sex with her. It happens again when she catches them going through her mom's underwear drawer.
- Right in Front of Me:[Remer rings the doorbell]
Coop: I don't wanna go to a party with a bunch of losers from high school!
Remer: This is Britney Kaiser's house, and I really really wanna fuck her.
[notices Britney's dad just opened the door and overheard them]
Coop and Remer: Dr. Kaiser!
- Running Gag: Cain's headaches. Of course, he's Surrounded by Idiots.
- Also, the "I hear your _____'s going out with Squeak!" psyche-out. Taken to its logical conclusion when Squeak himself uses it.
- The look Jenna makes when she's surprised or weirded out by something.
- Second Place Is for Losers: After losing the championship game at the beginning, the Beers are met with hats and assorted merchandise labeled "LOSERS."
- Screw the Money, I Have Rules!: Ted Denslow is already rich, but he made Baseketball into a real sport because he wanted a national sport that focuse more on the spirit of the game than the franchising.
Coop: Dammit, man! I'm trying to save an innocent life!Remer: I'm giving it all I've got, Captain!
- La-Z-Boy, to Roy Hobbs' Wonderboy (a bat he carved himself from a fallen tree) in The Natural.
- The salute Coop, Remer and Squeak give at the end was copied from a touchdown celebration ("The Mile High Salute") the Denver Broncos were known for at the time.
- Star Trek jokes during the second hospital scene (Matt and Trey being huge Star Trek fans).
- South Park
- Coop psyches a guy who never misses using his Eric Cartman voice to throw him off.
- While talking to Remer in the locker room, Coop dips into Mr. Garrison's voice when he sarcastically quips about "how much Doug Reemer cares about kids."
- Earlier, he also talked to Denslow briefly in a voice similar to Tweek's dad.
- "I'm the king of the world!"
- "Remember to hold your breath just before we hit-NEVER LET GO!!!"
- An in-universe example; Coop's number 44 pays homage to his sports hero Reggie Jackson who was number 44 on the Yankees.
- "FREEDOM!! FREEEEDOM!!"
- Small Role, Big Impact: Ted Denslow barely has 10 minutes of screentime, but it's because of his financial backing that Baseketball became a national pasttime.
- Strange Minds Think Alike:
- For some reason, everyone but Baxter thinks that Shaq got rich from playing in college.
- "Did I just fart?"
- Straw Loser: At the start of the movie, Coop and Remer face the fact that they've done nothing with their lives since high school, especially since it seems like ALL their former classmates are successfull.
- Stunt Double: In-universe. Remer has one running the bases for him.
- Suspiciously Apropos Music: "Warts on Your Dick" (performed by Trey Parker).Singer: And those warts on your dick won't go away/Unless you use that topical cream every day!
- Take That!: It's a movie by the South Park crew; The list could fill its own page.
- Those Two Guys: Coop and Remer before the NBL was established.
- Tiny Guy, Huge Girl: Squeak and his "female" fan are the extreme of this.
- Trash Talk: "Psyche-outs"; an official part of the game.
- Un-Entendre: Yvette, being a trophy wife, frequently mistakes Baxter's unconventional requests as sexual come-ons:Baxter: But you know, my [glances at groin] lobby could use a good buffing, if you know what I mean.
Yvette: I know exactly what you mean.
[Cut to Yvette struggling to use a janitor's buffer in the lobby]
- Vapor Wear: The cheerleaders' "uniforms", from any team tend to be lingerie of some sort.
- Verbal Tic: Coop and Remer mutter "cock" randomly on occasion. Notably at the party in the beginning, after being insulted by everyone.
- Video Wills: How Denslow leaves the team to Coop.
- We Hardly Knew Ye: Ted Denslow
- You're Nothing Without Your Phlebotinum: Coop and his La-Z-Boy ball. Ultimately subverted.