One day, Twilight Sparkle tries to cast a new spell. [[BalefulPolymorph It turns her and, for some reason, Big Macintosh into spiders.]] They then have lots and lots of ''spider sex.'' Twilight gets pregnant with spider babies, who then hatch and kill Spike. There is a [[SarcasmMode very exciting]] chase, and the two run into another spider named Miriam Webster and one of Pinkie Pie’s sisters. The baby spiders bring Spike back to life by spitting all his juices back, Twilight and Big Mac are turned back into ponies by Miriam, the author has a SelfInsert cameo as an alicorn, and Twilight returns home.

Now stretch that one paragraph across a few pages, misspell almost every word, use no grammar whatsoever, and voila! You have ''The Spiderses,'' the ''WesternAnimation/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic'' [[TrollFic answer to]] ''Fanfic/MyImmortal'' and ''Fanfic/HalfLifeFullLifeConsequences.''

The fic can be read on Pastebin [[ here]], or on Fimfiction [[ here]]. There are also a few dramatic readings on Website/{{Youtube}}, if you are so inclined, with the equivalent of the Gmod version as part of [[ Rainbow Dash Presents]].

%%* AndThatsTerrible
* AnimalTalk: Averted. Spiders can understand pony speech, but not the other way around. Pinkie Pie's sister is an exception.
* AscendedExtra: Pinkie's sister. It's never specified whether it's Inky or Blinky.
* AuthorAvatar / SelfInsert: Argembarger suddenly appears as an alicorn for absolutely no reason, just so Twilight can try and have "pony sex" with him. He blows her off and leaves in the same paragraph he's introduced.
* AWizardDidIt: Literally so when Big Mac and Twilight were turned back to ponies by [[IncrediblyLamePun Merriam Webster]].
* BackFromTheDead: The baby spiders bring Spike back to life by [[ArtisticLicenseBiology putting his vital fluids back into his body]]
* BalefulPolymorph: Twilight Sparkle and Big Macintosh, obviously.
* CoitusEnsues: Big Macintosh's reaction to possibly being stuck in spider form? LET'S HAVE SEX!
* DeathIsCheap: Sucked all the juices out of Spike? No biggie, just spit them back into him and he'll come back to life like nothing happened.
* DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment
* FriendsWithBenefits: Twilight simply refers to Big Mac as a "good friend" at the end of the fic despite having spider sex and babies with him, implying their relationship is this.
* {{Metaphorgotten}}:
-->''they started to have spider sex and it felt rely wieird for twilight but twilight nevr even had normal regualr pony sex so spider sex was the weirdest most strage thing ever. it was like a crunchy potato chip bag full of chips got throwed into an chainlink fence and [[LampshadeHanging i dont know wer this metaphor goesing. amynore.]]''
%%* MouseWorld
* {{Pluralses}}: The title.
* PurpleProse: The below-mentioned [[ArtEvolution Writing Evolution]].
* RememberTheNewGuy: The AuthorAvatar is presented as Twilight Sparkle's "bestest friend in the world."
* RougeAnglesOfSatin: To the point where it's almost illegible.
* SpoofAesop: "Dear Princess Celestia, today I learned that spiders are creepy, but being a spider is better than being dead."
%%* StylisticSuck: And how.
* SwitchingPOV: The narration randomly shifts from third-person to Twilight Sparkle's first-person.
%%* ThankingTheViewer
* TransformationFiction: The story revolves around Twilight Sparkle and Big Macintosh being transformed into spiders.
* TrollFic: Eeyup. Trollestia [[ greatly endorsed this]] as a "GODLIKE FANFICTION EXPERIENCE".
* WaveOfBabies: The spider babies after they hatch.
* WordSaladTitle: The chapter titles.
* [[ArtEvolution Writing Evolution]]: For a few short paragraphs, the fic suddenly improves in quality...just long enough to kill Spike before getting even worse than before.