Not Quite Heroes
by MatthewC is a Kim Possible
action-adventure fanfic, in which one of Dr. Drakken's plans to take over the world
is derailed by another villain who steals Drakken's latest invention to use in his own bid for global domination. This leads to a battle of villain against villain
— some of the heroic characters from the series
become involved, but the focus is on Drakken and Shego's adventure. Along the way, there are some interesting character insights, concluding with one possible view of Drakken's thoughts and actions
in So the Drama
This fanfic provides examples of:
- A.I. Is a Crapshoot: Drakken once created a lair-management AI that tried to kill everybody in the lair. It remains online, connected only to some speakers and sensors until he gets around to debugging it. Hilarity Ensues when Shego holds Ron captive in that particular lair — the computer tells Ron that it wants to help him escape and guides him to a chute leading to a lethal drop. Ron's pants get caught, enabling him to climb back to safety.
- And Then What?: At one point, Shego asks Drakken what he'll do with the world if he succeeds in taking it over. After thinking it over a bit, he says that he'll mostly let the existing governments run things as long as they acknowledge his supremacy and respect his genius. They'll just contact him occasionally when they need some problem solved — perhaps he'll set up a website where they can send requests for help.
- Bragging Theme Tune: The introductory chapter is a Shego-and-Drakken-centered parody of the show's title sequence and theme song.
- Cut Lex Luthor a Check: Drakken occasionally invents something that isn't useful for taking over the world, but does have profitable potential. He has a lawyer/agent who sells these inventions through cover identities and launders the proceeds back to Drakken. One of more annoyingly tedious parts of Shego's job is to pick out these opportunities from the flood of crazy ideas.
- Dartboard of Hate: Shego sometimes personalizes her sparring-practice robot with a latex mask of Kim Possible's face. She's actually a bit embarrassed about it, especially when Ron stumbles across it.
- Enemy Mine: Shego finds herself uneasily allied with Dr. Director in the final battle.
- Even Evil Has Standards: After Henchman Carter spills his guts, Shego admits to herself that she's glad she didn't actually have to carry out her threats.
- Evil Versus Evil
- Go Karting with Bowser: While waiting for Kim to show up and rescue Ron, Shego passes the time by playing video games with him.
- Hero of Another Story: During the climactic battle, a brief cutaway to Team Possible shows them busy fighting cultists who are attempting to summon an Eldritch Abomination.
- High-Altitude Interrogation: Shego persuades Henchman Carter to tell what he knows about Gemini's plans by threatening to send him skydiving without a parachute.
- Hypocritical Humor: Drakken is absolutely outraged that another villain invaded his laboratory and "outsourced" one of his inventions.
- Let's You and Him Fight: A good-guy version of a usual villain tactic: When Shego visits Yamanuchi looking for information about the enemy's main fighter, Sensei gives her some advice that turns out to be useful. He does so out of pragamatic calculation: the more closely matched the two evil factions are, the more damage they will do to each other.
- The Mole: Henchman John Carter
- Not a Game: Shego tries to talk Drakken into escaping while they have the chance rather than continue the fight out of wounded pride. She even addresses him by his real name in an attempt to get through to him:
"This isn't like going off to fight Kim Possible. They're not going to hit you over the head and dump you in a nice comfy jail cell. Drew, these people will kill you. They'll kill you, and then you'll just be a small, pathetic dead man named Drew Lipsky."
- One Last Job: As the story draws to a close, Drakken decides that the reason he keeps failing is that he never really gives his full effort to a plan, because he knows he can always try again later. He resolves to put one hundred percent into his next effort, promising himself that this time he'll either take over the world or quit trying.
- The Reveal/Everybody Knew Already: The first appearance of Drakken's enemy avoids naming him, but gives enough description to identify him as Gemini.
- Revenge Before Reason: Drakken is determined to get his invention back and make Gemini pay for stealing it, dismissing Shego's practical advice to just escape, start over, and let Kim Possible or Global Justice or somebody else deal with him.
- "The Reason You Suck" Speech: After luring Drakken and Shego into a trap, Gemini tells her that she's a follower rather than a villain in her own right because she lacks the ability to come up with plans and ideas of her own.
- The story indicates that this is why she still uses her Team Go codename and costume rather than creating a new supervillain identity.
- This Is Something He's Got to Do Himself: While trying to track down Ron, Kim has learned that Drakken is missing, and offers to help Shego find him. Shego turns her down, because she can't abide the idea of having Kim do her job for her.
- Villain Episode: The story is Drakken and Shego's adventure; Kim and Ron are involved only tangentially (see the "What Would Kim Possible Do?" entry).
- "What Now?" Ending: The story ends with Drakken being taken to prison in the aftermath of "So The Drama", bitterly realizing that he'd made his best effort to take over the world and failed anyway. He is left wondering what he'll do now.
- What Would Kim Possible Do?: At a loss to come up with a plan to find and rescue Drakken (see the "The Reason You Suck" Speech entry), Shego kidnaps Ron in order to find out how Kim does it. Kim blitzed her way through Drakken's henchmen until some of them provided her with useful leads. Shego doesn't see any way to emulate this strategy... until thinking about henchmen makes her connect the dots and realize that Carter is really working for Gemini.