''[[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6536396/1/Stupid_Devil_Dog Stupid Devil Dog]]'' by [[http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1230588/The-Real-Lee-is-here The Real Lee is here]] is a ''LightNovel/TheFamiliarOfZero'' fic with a very different Saito. [[MilitaryBrat Saito]] [[BadassBookworm Hiraga]] is the third son of a Japanese-American military family, who raised in a very regimented lifestyle, always pushing him to do his best. Saito has been training to join the military for years, when one day he goes to bed and wakes up in front of a pink-haired girl.

Saito is not pleased as he tries dealing being [[TrappedInAnotherWorld trapped in another world]] with a spoiled noble and trying to maintain his identity.

Comes recommended on ''The Familiar of Zero'' [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/FanficRecs/TheFamiliarOfZero fanfic rec page]]

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!!Tropes:

* AmbiguouslyBi: Scarron is extremely flamboyant and insists on being called Mi Mademoiselle instead of Sir, but also has a daughter.
* AristocratsAreEvil: Saito, Siesta and Foquet all have this view, justified as most nobles they met are privileged jerks.
* BullyingADragon: Malicorne tries to make Saito get out of his seat even though Saito has already defeated two students (and three accredited mages but he doesn't know that).
* ContrivedCoincidence: Saito attacks Mott at roughly the same time Siesta is arriving to be his new maid/slave.
* CoolPlane: The "Dragon's Raiment", which in this fic is a Vietnam-era [[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/McDonnell_Douglas_F-4_Phantom_II F-4E Phantom II]] fighter jet.
* CorruptChurch: The Church of Brimir wiped out villages for worshiping their God differently.
* CulturalPosturing: Saito brags in to nobles that in his world [[MundaneLuxury they bathe once a day]]
* CombatPragmatist: Saito, constantly using superior firepower and tricks to win his fights.
--> "Dishonorable means using a human shield, it would be me using these people as a wall between you and me. Throwing paprika (into your eyes), that was just being pragmatic."
* DeliberateValuesDissonance: Saito is appalled by how nobles treat anyone that works under them.
** Headmaster Oswald and Louise were horrified to learn that Saito and the dead soldier brought the Staff of Destruction are ''Protestant.''
* DisproportionateRetribution: For stealing a student's wand, the students family orders Saito's death.
* ExtremeOmnisexual: While under the effects of a love potion, Saito in love with whoever he's looking at shortly after Louise dispels it, regardless of gender or ''species''.
* FixFic: Said by the author himself.
* {{Foreshadowing}}: Colbert mentions a dragon whose blood is a clear orange and oddly flammable. Said "dragon" is later shown to be a fighter jet and the blood is jet fuel.
* GenreSavvy: Saito.
* [[GiveMeBackMyWallet Give Me Back My Knife]]: Conrad tried pickpocketing Saito. Not a smart idea
* HappinessInSlavery: Averted. Saito does not put up with Louise's antics, and even calls her out on it.
** Saito notes [[spoiler: his runes might hasten the effect.]]
* InsistentTerminology: Saito is ''not'' a Familiar, thank you very much. He eventually settles on being Louise's Ally; even Louise ends up thinking of him as such.
* ItIsDehumanizing: In Louise's narration, she consistently calls Saito "the familiar" or "it." Which Saito calls her out on, since she doesn't even see him as human.
* {{Jerkass}}: Saito. It's still unclear (specially considering the disonance between his actions during flashbacks and the present) if he is a JerkWithAHeartOfGold.
* JerkassHasAPoint: Saito again. Many times he looks like the OnlySaneMan.
* KnowWhenToFoldEm: Saito flees from Andre rather than fight since (as Saito put it), the man uses fire magic and they were in a large flammable building.
* MilitaryBrat: Saito, along with his brother and sister, Ben and Megumi.
* MugglesDoItBetter: At one point Louise compares Saito's bed (with a memory foam mattress) to sleeping on a cloud.
* NoSympathy: Louise has none for Saito, especially since she ripped him from his home.
** In canon, Kirche used her familiar to drag Saito to her bedroom, where she was awaiting to try and ravish him. When she does this in this timeline, Saito dodges and throws Flame out a several-story window. He then drags it back up to her room, kicks down the door, and tells her that if she tries that again, he will kill her and the familiar, not even noticing her charms. Granted, it's because he thinks she was trying to assassinate him after having ''already'' survived several attempts... but still!
** Subverted when Louise actually takes Saito's TheReasonYouSuckSpeech to heart and thinks of the implications of dragging him into her world.
* NotSoDifferent: Saito and Louise have a number of things in common that define their characters: both are the youngest of three children, though Saito gets along with his siblings while Louise's eldest sister is a [[BigBrotherBully heartless bully]] and the middle sister is kindly, but also sickly; they both have strict, domineering mothers whom they both fear and admire; both have a somewhat bratty demeanor--Saito being a MilitaryBrat and Louise behaving like a SpoiledBrat; and they both have quite nasty tempers.
* NothingPersonal: Gerald attempts to kill Saito because he was ordered too. Personally he thought whipping him would be sufficient.
* {{Omniglot}}: Saito can speak English, Japanese and French.
* OOCIsSeriousBusiness: It shows how furious Saito is at Montmorency and Guiche for stealing his money that he temporarily breaks out of his potion induced love of Tabitha to verbally rip them a new one. Previously, he'd only managed it to keep himself from killing someone.
* OrderedApology: Louise ineffectively orders Saito to apologize to Guiche in the middle of their deal. He refuses.
* OCStandIn: TropesAreNotBad, as Saito is much more sympathetic and developed than canon Saito as he realizes something is seriously wrong with the situation and tries to rectify it.
* PetTheDog: Louise takes Saito to the infirmary and pays for a healer.
** Gerald, after outright saying he's there to assassinate him, asks Saito why he isn't attacking. Saito notes the inn behind him (Gerald) saying he doesn't want the fight to go in there. Gerald promptly moves away from it.
* RealityEnsues: When Gerald's familiar grab's Saito's pistol by the barrel and bounds off, the shaking causes the gun to go off, shooting said familiar in the head.
* TheReasonYouSuckSpeech: Saito ''tears'' Louise a new one, when she tries to stop him from leaving Tristain Academy. She's only stopping him because her reputation would go in the tubes if he leaves:
-->Saito: "I'm leaving because you ripped me out of my home, my family, my friends, my future, my life. I'm leaving because your terrible magic is twisting my mind, and wiping memories out of my head. Hell, you probably didn't even consider that I had a life before I got here. You are insensitive and self-centered. I'm leaving and nothing you do can stop me."
* ScrewThisImOuttaHere: Days in after being summoned, Saito decides to leave, rather than deal with Louise's treatment.
* StrayShotsStrikeNothing: Inverted. Andre's and Gerald's spells that miss Saito during their fight hit several homes and kill at least a few people.
* TechnicalPacifist: Saito. He does walk around carrying a lot of guns (even a missile launcher!), but tries to avoid killing people.
* TemptingFate: Saito after his duel with Guiche:
-->'''Saito''': Relax, I seriously doubt that I can piss someone off enough to start another fight.
-->''6 hours later''
-->"I, Roger Armagnac de Fézensaguet challenge you to a duel!"
* TranslatorMicrobes: Averted. Saito never needs the translation spell, since he already speaks French.
* TomatoInTheMirror: Some time after Saito returns to Tristain Academy, Louise, Guiche and Kirche discuss on how his behavior is questionable, something that, given the arguments on the table, even the reader might agree on. He starts wondering to himself how he became that much of an asshole.
* TookALevelInKindness: Saito eventually evolves from a {{Jerkass}} to a JerkWithAHeartOfGold.
* TheUglyGuysHotDaughter: People are very surprised that Jessica's father is Scarron.
* WeirdnessMagnet: Saito for LetsYouAndHimFight situations.
--> '''Saito:''' "[[LampshadeHanging Jesus Christ, everywhere I go I get into a fight. This isn't normal.]] Starting to piss me off."
* {{Yandere}}: Saito turns into one when he [[spoiler:drinks a love potion]], but subverted since [[spoiler:every time Louise uses Dispel, he falls in love with someone different (Louise, Tabitha and Guiche, in that order)]].