"This baby was meant driving drunk"
is a Mortal Kombat Fan Fiction this troper wrote. It's a comedic story about Scorpion on his grudge quest, finding out on who killed his family. Scorpion for the longest time thought it was Sub Zero. Sub Zero convinces Scorpion that he didn't kill his family, and Scorpion forces Sub Zero go on his grudge quest with him. Along the way they get help from Reptile and Smoke, and they get in all sorts of crazy stuff, while trying to find out who killed Scropion's family.
- Accidental Misnaming: When the troper posted his fanfiction to to other websites he noticed he gave the second Sub Zero the wrong name, and was joked about it in the other websites
Reptile: "You got a point Bi-Han" Sub Zero: "That's not my name" Reptile: "Whatever"
* Fantastic Racism
Kobra was about to call Sub Zero an offensive racial slur against Asians, calling him "Dirty yellow"
- Reptile has his moments, when he called Jax some pretty darn offensive things. Though it could be accidental since he's spewing out nonsense as he usually does, and does yell out he's not racist, after his string of Racial insults.
- I Never Told You My Name Reptile at one point says Sub Zero's real name but he never says how he knew (though this is averted when the troper posted in other websites, since he called him Bi-han, the first Sub Zero, but the Sub Zero in the fan fic is Kuai Lang).
- Surrounded by Idiots When Scorpion was being forced to drink alcohol by Noob Saibot trying to make him pass out, Reptile and Sub Zero were just shouting "CHUG CHUG!" not doing anything to help Scorpion.
- You and What Army? Reptile uses this a lot, usually not for the better.