'Cause heaven knows you'll never want to read this while sober ever again.
- Any time the author keeps the characters in-character, take a sip.
- Any time the author makes something contrived to keep his story on track, take a sip. (Anymore during Part Two and you'll die from alcohol poisoning before it's even half over.)
- Whenever Fluttershy acts like her normally sweet self while imposing horrible Mind Rape on someone else, take a drink.
- Whenever Dash says something sarcastic in Part One, take a drink.
- Whenever there's a change in Dash's behavior as the result of the baby treatment, take a drink.
- When a Wham Line or overall Wham Moment occurs, take two. You'll need 'em.
- Finally, whenever someone has visibly been broken by Fluttershy's treatment: just down a whole glass. You'll thank us.