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Dethroning Moment: The Angry Video Game Nerd
James Rolfe, we love you to death, but every once in a while, you put out something that makes us all wonder: What were you thinking?
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The Angry Video Game Nerd
bobdrant: I'm a fan of The Angry Video Game Nerd and I can usually look past whenever he uses toilet humor and just enjoy his reviews. However, that was not the case for his review of various Star Wars games for different systems. Long story short, towards the end of the review, James begins talking about all the Star Wars games he didn't review (mostly because there's so many of them), and, for no reason whatsoever, a buffalo just takes a crap and breaks his window. I consider it to be the DMOS for the AVGN, because, well, it's pretty much the laziest writing I've seen from him. The joke makes no sense, there's no buildup to it, and it has nothing to do with the subject matter he's reviewing. It's like he just randomly threw in over-the-top toilet humor just for the sake of having over-the-top toilet humor. C'mon, James, you're better than this. You're The Angry Video Game Nerd, not the "Random Jokes About Poop Nerd".
Video Game Crack: And then there's his 100th video, which, like his Crazy Castle review, spends less time reviewing and more time with an unnecessary plot. The DMOS kicks in when you look at his previous video - the Star Wars one - and realise that it's much better made (aside from the stupid joke at the end, of course) and that it would have deserved that spot much, much more.
Dr Zulu 2010: For me, it was AVGN's review of Metal Gear on the NES. Now, I would be the first one to know that the NES Metal Geat was Porting Disaster compared to the MSX version. But the nerd seems to put it on pedestral while pointing out flaws who were in the MSX version (like using the correct card on the door and using the gas mask with the broken item select menu, respawning) and showing no understanding of continues and the password system (like how they depends on what rank you are so you will respawn there). I know James really puts effort on his reviews, but on that one, he dropped the ball.
Johnnytherock: The Schwarzenegger Games review seems to be an indication that even James himself has no more passion for the role. In one scene, he flatly delivers three of his catchphrases in succession and takes a swig of Rolling Rock, all in about five seconds. The quality has declined since the old days, and previous reviews had parts that dragged, but this seemed all too perfunctory to be entertaining.
Purple Shirt: For me, it was the last half of his Castlevania reviews. The main reason was he made a huge Critical Research Failure twice. Castlevania64 has its share of flaws, but what he calls a "Fatal Flaw" is in fact his own inability to press the "interact" button. What makes this even more Face Palm worthy is that he somehow never thought of trying that button, given that he made it that far in the game. Maybe he's saying it's what happened when he was a kid, but even then, he never states it, nor does he try to correct this flaw when he's an adult. What's also bad is he's shown using the "interact" button earlier on, so he clearly knows it's there. His second one was where he says "...In Dawn of Sorrow, Dracula's Castle appears over Japan." That's Aria of Sorrow. Maybe it was a slip of the tongue, but he kind of shows he didn't really bother to play Dawn of Sorrow much. (Given that in the game, you are Dracula, you'd think he'd be intrigued.) He's normally pretty good about doing his reading, but honestly James, I'm disappointed.
darkrage6: Agreed, you'd expect this kind of blatant error from the Irate Gamer, not from James of all people(the joke at the end of the Star Wars review is also the kind of random pointless joke you'd expect from the IG).
Fofa: Those weren't the only instances of Critical Research Failure those videos had, though those examples do stick out like a sore thumb. Others include aiming the whip being possible in Bloodlines (complete with Eric attacking straight upwards as he said that), Castlevania 64 doesn't have any music when it actually does (which you can actually hear in the video) and the majority of the games mostly happened inside the castle since the beginning, when he said that the games started doing it after Symphony of the Night. Add that with the heavily implied "It's not Super Castlevania IV and the rest of the series should have follow it's example" vibe, it makes those episodes hard to watch.
Kuuenbu: In his "Super NES vs. Sega Genesis" video, he lets his biasget thebetterof him and says that, unlike with the SNES controller, you can only press one Genesis gamepad button at a time. Any idiot who has ever held a Genesis/Mega Drive controller for 10 seconds knows you can press two (or even three, though it's difficult and counter-intuitive) buttons simultaneously by adjusting the angle of your palm. Given how much he seems to be attempting a fair analysis, this egregious offense makes his self-admitted bias just plain facepalm-inducing. You'd think this would be something so obvious that no moron could possibly fall for it, but if James fucking Rolfe could be this dumb, it wouldn't be that big a stretch to see pre-teen Nintendo fanboys watching that video and saying "You see, you can't press more than one button on Sega like you can on Nintendo! I told you Nintendo is what Genesisn'tnote yes, there really was a SNES ad that used this phrase!"
ilovedededeAGAIN: The "Zelda Timeline" video which, for me, is when the series started to go downhill. To explain, all the video contains is a 19 minute talk about how confusing the Zelda Timeline is. The Nerd fully explains to us, dead as crap, that there was a sequel (Zelda II: The Adventure of Link) to the original (The Legend of Zelda), a prequel to the original (A Link to the Past), a sequel to the prequel (Link's Awakening), a prequel to the prequel (Ocarina of Time), and a sequel to the Young Link of the prequel's prequel (Majora's Mask), and even fully states that any hopes of a Zelda 3 is beyond dead. There are very few jokes, the anger level is really low (I know that he mentioned that at the beginning but is was lower than he said it would be), and doesn't really give a full explanation of where Twilight Princess fits in the timeline. Also, he even says that the video was made in November 2006, but because Game Traliers made a similar video, he held it back until January 2008. This video is uninspiring, let's just leave it at that.
Gameite2260: My god, the "Toxic Crusaders" review was just one long-ass moment of "Let's watch Lloyd Kaufman ruin the entire episode with endless shit and ass-related jokes". This whole episode almost sounded like something the AVGN would make fun of. And of course it ends with Lloyd taking a shit on the cartridge, kinda like how he took a shit all over this episode.
Man Called True: The "Action 52" episode. He decides to cover all 51 non-Cheetahmen games in a single episode. A single 20-minute episode. This reduces his comments on any single game to "It sucks, let's move on". An absolute waste of an opportunity.
ldelavina3: His "Ikari Warriors" episode is a huge DMoS for me. It just doesn't feel like an AVGN episode and more like watching two players endlessly yell at the TV. Says what you will about the "Battletoads" episode which is somewhat similar, but at least there it was actually humour and not forced. This episode is like if you took that review and strip it of everything that was good about it.
fluffything: While "Motherfucker Mike" is something of a hit-n-miss character (I like the Glitch videos he does, but not much else), his "commentary" of Elmo In Grouchland is just awful. Him constantly (and I do mean constantly) whining about Elmo in the video is bad enough, but that's not the worst of it. Now, the absolute low-point is a joke he makes (that has absolutely nothing to do with the film) regarding Cookie Monster seeing Gordon and his wife (I forget her name) having sex completele with poorly-drawn illustration (Though, thankfully, the more "graphic" elements are censored). Really? A pointless sex joke during a review of a children's movie? Dude, Not Funny!. Not funny in the least.
RA 2: Mike Matei and a poorly-voiced foul-mouthed Inspector Gadget review Minecraft. It's like a really gruesome car accident that you can't stop looking at. The poop jokes (Minecraft = Minecrap) were stupid, but didn't phase me - Elmo in Grouchland confirmed that Mike's only talent is making kids' show characters spew profanity. But as someone who dabbles in 3D replicas myself, I was furious with his comments about a full-scale replica of the Enterprise made in Minecraft "It's just following a blueprint that someone else made, not real effort... seems more like Monkey See, Monkey do...I would guess that [the guy who made it] has quite possibly never had sex." Fuck you Mike, what have you contributed to the world? Oh yeah that's right, nothing that didn't involve suckling from James' teat. And don't give me "technically it was Gadget who said those things," because that would be like if Seth Macfarlane wasn't held accountable for the things Brian said. I loved the AVGN's work, but not enough to stay subscribed to him when that worthless talentless, tasteless, one-trick pond scum continues to put out videos in the Nerd's name.
Caiaphasthesympathist: The original description for said video mentioned that it was a "way to poke fun at Minecraft videos, which are plaguing YouTube". Without any explanation for why it was made beyond that, it becomes a painfully glaring case of It's Popular, Now It Sucks with zero redeeming qualities.
Midna: For me, it was probably Gadget's "I love building brown bricks with Minecrap" spiel. It would have been mildly amusing, if infantile, if it was only said once... but then he just keeps saying it over and over for almost half a minute. One gets the impression that Matei thought the scene was comedy gold and wanted to milk it for all it was worth.
Other Cinemassacre productions
MadMan400096: My most hated Cinemassacre video probably has to be the You Know Whats Bullshit episode where the Bullshit Man rants about amps that don't go up to eleven. Yes. He's really bitching that virtually all amps go no higher than ten. Just because an amp in This Is Spinal Tap went up to eleven. Even though it was a joke. I was willing to tolerate the "Microwave" one, since while I never have problems with it, others may feel the same as him, even if they miss the point of the beep, but this was just stupid and trivial. It doesn't help that there actually are amps that go up to eleven nowadays, either, and that he's clearly not looking hard enough.