History DeadpanSnarker / FanFics

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[[AC: ''Anime/AhMyGoddess'']]
* ''Fanfic/AhArchfall'' has a few but probably the best one is this:
-->'''Belldandy:''' "We could try... singing?"\\
'''Jago:''' "Well that depends: would you rather be cremated or buried at sea?"

[[AC: ''Series/{{Angel}}'']]
* ''Series/{{Angel}}'' fanfics tend to make Wesley extra snarky.

[[AC: ''Series/{{Arrowverse}}'']]
* In ''FanFic/ToHellAndBackArrowverse'', Oliver, though it's more pronounced when he's around Barry and Kara, both of whom have shades of this as well.

[[AC: ''WesternAnimation/AvatarTheLastAirbender'']]
* Sho in ''Webcomic/HowIBecameYours''
* Movie!Yue in ''FanFic/BringMeAllYourElderly'', as she's perfectly aware that she's in a bad movie.
** Most of the animated cast has one or two moments to get their snark on. Karata draws special enjoyment from mocking her [[AdaptationalWimp movie counterpart]].

[[AC: ''Film/{{The Avengers|2012}}'']]
* If Tony and Loki are in the same fic, there will undoubtedly be SnarkToSnarkCombat
* Tony, Loki, Darcy, Clint, Coulson and Natasha tend to be written with this as a defining character trait.

[[AC: ''Webcomic/AxisPowersHetalia'']]
* Matt, Arthur, and Chris from ''FanFic/PartRightHalfWrongAThirdCrazy'', although given that it's pretty much a WorldOfSnark, practically everyone is this at some point.

[[AC: ''WesternAnimation/BatmanBeyond'']]
* ''Fanfic/BatmanBeyondRevisited'': He goes up against demons, sadists, and other manners of dangerous men, and Jake still plays this role as long as he can.

[[AC: ''VisualNovel/{{Clannad}}'']]
* ''FanFic/AnEndToAllThings'' features an Okazaki that's possibly even snarkier than in the canon.

[[AC: ''ComicStrip/CalvinAndHobbes'']]
* Pretty much anyone who's not [[TooDumbToLive an idiot]] or [[WeirdnessCensor unobservant]] in [[Fanfic/Swing123AndGarfieldodiesCalvinverse the Calvinverse]].

[[AC: CrossOver]]
* Firefly in ''Fanfic/AceCombatTheEquestrianWar''.
* In ''FanFic/DeusExEquineRevengeance'', about half of Facet's dialogue thus far has been devoted to snarking somepony. Rainbow Dash actually stated that he held back in his intro scene because her infant son was present.
* Dalek Sec from ''Fanfic/AHero'', [[NoIndoorVoice surprisingly enough.]]
-->'''Kyouko''': What the hell are you!?
-->'''Sec''': I AM AN IM-PE-RIA-LIS-TIC SPA-CE NA-ZI.
* Tatl Beryllia in ''Fanfic/TheBlueBlurOfTermina'', especially with Sonic:
-->'''Sonic:''' (spotting the doors out of the Clock Tower) Hey, is that the way out?
-->'''Tatl:''' You see any ''other'' doors, kid? Let's ''go'' already!
* Elite Four Boss and Jack Noir in ''FanFic/DaveStdiderPokemonTraner''.
* Ethan Sunderland, aka [[VideoGame/FalloutNewVegas the Courier]], in [[Fanfic/MassFoundations Mass Foundations: Redemption in the Stars]]. He makes sarcastic commentary on just about everything.
%% * Shirou in ''Fanfic/TheHillOfSwords''.
* ''Fanfic/SoulChess'' has a few. Namely Lelouch [[spoiler: in chapter 132, making Aizen flip out]] and [[spoiler: Eien Tamashi, Lelouch's Zanpakuto; she channels C.C., the original snarker.]]
* Bronzong of the ''Total Pokémon Island'' series. Moreso in Total Pokémon World Tour.
* Harry becomes exponentially snarky in ''[[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6335808/1/The_Wizard_in_the_Shadows The Wizard In The Shadows]]'' after a start in which he didn't talk much at all, then getting steadily snarkier as time goes on. This is largely a reaction to trauma and his way of dealing with it. The narration is also [[LemonyNarrator decidedly lemony]].
-->'''Narrator''': Gimli, having reached the Horn, blew on it, causing one massive, and vaguely flatulent sound to echo over the deep.

-->'''Harry''': *just after Gandalf frees Théoden from Saruman* Look upon your kingdom once more. I hear it’s very nice this time of year.

-->'''Théoden''': What does Rohan owe Gondor?
-->'''Harry''': Would you like me to list that alphabetically, or chronologically?
* While several characters get their moments in ''[[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8878584/1/Beyond-the-Veil-Volume-One-Arrival Beyond the Veil]]'', [[WesternAnimation/XMenEvolution Kitty]] has one of the best when the group stumbles upon [[Literature/HarryPotter Harry]] fighting [[VoluntaryShapeshifting Mystique]].
-->'''Kurt''': "Which one's the real Harry?"
-->'''Kitty''': "Probably the one shooting magic from his hands."
* ''Fanfic/ChildOfTheStorm'' has a WorldOfSnark. Practically ''every'' character gets their moments.
** Even Thor gets in on the act - something which isn't quite so surprising when you factor in that he was once James Potter. However, Loki, Tony, Darcy, and Harry Dresden are the chief snarkers. [[SnarkToSnarkCombat Dresden and Tony actually wind up in a snark-off.]] ''[[UpToEleven Asgardians were taking bets.]]''
** Harry Potter (later usually known as Harry Thorson, though he answers to both) is sarcastic to begin with, as in canon, and responds to the shenanigans and murder attempts of increasing scale by becoming a compulsive DeadpanSnarker. For example, in canon, his response to his name coming out of the Goblet of Fire is stunned shock. Here, it's a very deadpan PrecisionFStrike.
-->'''Harry''': "Oh for fuck's sake."
** Doctor Strange a.k.a. [[spoiler: Taliesin]] mocks absolutely everyone and everything, often in as deadpan a fashion as possible.
* ''Fanfic/SOE2LoneHeirOfKrypton'': Shinji, in one omake.
-->'''Shinji''':''"Oh, gee, I'm so sorry. I don't know why I'm reacting like this. It's not like I'm surrounded by beautiful women who are tearing their own clothes off or anything."''
* ''Fanfic/ThousandShinji'': Due to his upbringing, Shinji develops a very dry, sarcastic sense of humor:
-->“Ah, Misato-san, I was going to say… you’re late,” Shinji said with some annoyance. If she had arrived on time the whole near death thing probably could have been avoided, and people who endangered his life tended to annoy him.
* A good number of characters in ''Series/BuffyTheVampireSlayer''/''ComicBook/{{Supergirl}}'' crossover ''Fanfic/TheVampireOfSteel''.
** Buffy is a big snarker:
--->'''Buffy:''' Yeah. One vamp with powers to change the course of mighty graveyards is all we need for now.
** And so is Supergirl, per canon:
--->To Linda, this whole scenario was making less and less sense in one way and more and more in another. Either Buffy was lying about being connected with drugs, or, worse, she could be a courier carrying something for the Outfit. Further out, she might be connected with some new wacky super-villain who decided to turn up in town for this month’s battle. Well, at least she could probably rule out Ambush Bug.
** And Giles:
--->'''Supergirl:''' Something wrong, Mr. Giles?\\
'''Giles:''' I was just reflecting on some truly horrible movies that I used to watch as a child. Mostly, we saw them on TV... we had "Creature Features" in Britain, too. They must’ve been made in the Fifties and early Sixties. Monsters or aliens would land in a small town, a bunch of teenagers would be the only ones who knew about it, and they’d be forced to defeat the monster. Then they’d go back and hit the malt shop afterwards. When I got out of my youth, I thought those were the stupidest movies I’d ever seen. And now, God help me, it seems they’re a preparatory text for my life.
* [[Series/KamenRiderGaim Mitsuzane]] in ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11772125/1/Metroid-Kamen-Rider-Generations-Full-Series Metroid: Kamen Rider Generations]]'' gets moments of this as the story progressed his CharacterDevelopment to the point he [[UpToEleven hams it up]]. [[spoiler:His snarkiness even surpassed that of [[Series/KamenRiderDrive Shinnosuke]].]]
* In ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11157943/2/I-Still-Haven-t-Found-What-I-m-Looking-For I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For]]'', Ki-Adi Mundi does an impressive job, despite being a jedi, after Harry Potter side-along apparates Ahsoka away.
-->'''Tre'jin:''' We should have expected this from her.\\
'''Ki-Adi:''' What, walking around with a Force wielding bounty hunter that can literally play with the minds of Masters? You must be far stronger in the Force than I to have predicted that.
** Likewise, Aayla gets quite snarky when the Jedi Council persist on asking of Harry's a sith even after she reveals how close Ahsoka came to dying. That Aayla just learned Barriss Offee isn't being punished for the crimes she framed Ahsoka for simply makes things worse.
-->'''Aayla:''' Well I did ask him for his Sith membership card and he didn't have one. ... Though I neglected to ask if he was a Sith in secret. I'm sure that he'd just blurt that out to me, so I guess it's still possible.

[[AC: ''Manga/DeathNote'']]
* In ''Fanfic/AllYouNeedIsLove'' Naomi, Light, and L all have their moments. Also OriginalCharacter Duck.
-->'''Naomi:''' I'm leaving, I'll be back later. Take care of yourselves and try not to destroy any furniture in your petty battles for world domination.
-->'''Light:''' My goal is not world domination.
-->'''Naomi:''' Light, you said you'd be god of the new world. What do you call that?
-->'''Light:''' A new era of enlightenment.
-->'''Duck:''' [[AtLeastIAdmitIt To save face and not sound like a jackass I'll be frank, my goal is world domination.]]
-->'''Naomi:''' Whatever. Try not to get any blood on the carpet.
* Matt, Light, and L in ''FanFic/ACureForLove'' in a very BritCom way.
-->'''Light:''' OK, 5 across. Dunderhead, 7 letters...
-->'''L:''' Matsuda.
-->'''Light:''' Ha. Not funny. I think it's...Ryuzaki...no, sorry, my mistake, it must be halfwit.
-->'''L:''' The answer is always the obvious one, Light-kun. I think you're making a mistake.
-->'''Light:''' Right and down...
-->'''L:''' Is that an offer or are you asking? This is a ridiculous crossword. Have we two, apparently the greatest minds of our age, really been reduced to doing a quick crossword?
-->'''Light:''' It's the best we have. Stop being a child.
-->'''L:''' Do you like the crossword more than me?
-->'''Light:''' It talks less.
-->'''L:''' And afterwards you can wipe your arse with it.
-->'''Light:''' You're speaking in English again.
-->'''L:''' I thought that you liked it when I talked.
-->'''Light:''' No, that's a misunderstanding on your part.
* Everyone in ''FanFic/TheEndIsNear'' but especially Light with his imaginary "advice column."
* Light Yagami is extra snarky in ''[[http://archiveofourown.org/works/431046/chapters/728720 Welcome To The Family]]''. So are Near, Matt, and Mello. Ryuk also has a rather twisted sense of humor.
-->'''Near:''' L is ''always'' on his computer. [[DeadMansSwitch If L's not on his computer that means he's dead.]]
-->'''Light:''' ...Or it could mean that L is trapped under his cake freezer.
* While it's generally common for fans to portray [[EnsembleDarkhorse Matt]] this way in fic, ''[[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7292991/1/Xanatos Xanatos]]'' decided to have a field day with it. Made [[HilarityEnsues even better]] by the fact that Linda generally [[SarcasmBlind doesn't get it right away]].
-->'''Matt''': Lin, I told you I got this worked out, didn't I? [[ItMakesSenseInContext We're going out my bedroom window.]]
-->'''Linda''': [[AskAStupidQuestion Out there? Um...are you sure?]]
-->'''Matt''': No, actually there's an underground network of tunnels running through a doorway in the back of my closet.
** L also fits this trope, and he and Matt even engage in SnarkToSnarkCombat.

[[AC: ''Anime/DigimonTamers'']]
* [[spoiler: Chaos]] and Terriermon from ''FanFic/{{Dimensions}}''. No relation. Plus Impmon.
* From the ''FanFic/TamersForeverSeries'' there's... well... okay bear with me ''#deep breath#'' [[spoiler: Chaos]], Rika, Ruki, Takato, Takeru, Terriermon, Hell even the ''AUTHOR'' (and his [[AuthorAvatar Avatar]]) counts as this.
** Although [[spoiler: Chaos]] is by far the most prominent example.

[[AC: ''Franchise/DragonAge'']]
* In the ''VideoGame/DragonAgeInquisition'' fic series ''Fanfic/TwiceUponAnAge'', Varric is at least as much of a deadpan snarker as he is in canon. In this, however, he's not just a character; he's the [[TheFourthWallWillNotProtectYou editor]], and a portion of the snark is found in the form of his [[NoteFromEd editor's notes]] throughout the main story. He's also credited as the author of one of the side volumes, ''The Skyhold Runner's Guide to Survival'', which is almost nothing ''but'' snark.
** Averted, however, in another side volume, ''Across the Waking Sea'' - this one is comprised of letters exchanged between himself and Bethany Hawke, and "Sunshine" is (as in canon) the one person to whom he is virtually never snarky.

[[AC: ''Franchise/FireEmblem'']]
* ''Fanfic/TheReactsverse'':
** ''Fanfic/LucinaReacts'': Half the cast, but Tharja, Robin and Lucina take the cake. Especially the latter two, anytime they have to clean up after everyone else's antics and shenanigans.
** ''Fanfic/CorrinReacts'': Azura is the main snarker, sassing out Corrin over his jokes and generally snarking, but Jakob and even ''Flora and Kaze'' get their moments.

[[AC: ''Manga/FullmetalAlchemist'']]
* ''[[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7986051/1/The_Seven_Names_of_Envy_Angevin The Seven Names of Envy Angevin]]'': Envy and Russell are especially prone to this, which is what makes them such good foils to the belligerent Ed and crazily hyper Ling respectively, and makes the banter so entertaining. A sample:
-->'''Ling''': Besides, you're being childish. I haven't even slept with anybody in... two weeks!
-->'''Russell''': Oh, how wonderful for you. Here's a memo: giving your pecker a two-week vacation doesn't make you less of a slag.

[[AC: ''Disney/{{Frozen}}'']]
* In ''Fanfic/WhatAboutWitchQueen'', ever since [[{{Snowlem}} Seeker]] appeared, she snarks from time to time, mostly due to her general tired-with-life attitude.
-->'''nameless guard''': What's this 'it'?\\
'''Seeker ([[FirstPersonSmartass in her head]])''': A neutral pronoun. Of course, you probably don't know it, seeing how you are apparently ready to believe someone is making deliveries in the middle of the night.\\
\\
'''Ferdinand''': He hugged me!\\
'''Seeker''': Truly, a mark of suspicious activity.

[[AC: ''Series/{{Glee}}'']]
* Jack Harmon and Daniel Lawson, {{Original Character}}s featured in ''FanFic/TheHarmonVerse'' live and breathe this trope.

[[AC: ''Franchise/{{Gundam}}'']]
* ''FanFic/ThoseThatCarryOn'': When Noah Bright is asked about his politeness by an imprisoned war criminal he shoots back “Would you rather I slapped you around?”

[[AC: ''Literature/HarryPotter'']]
* Harry (and later, Tonks and Fleur) in ''Fanfic/ForLoveOfMagic'' speaks fluent snark.
* Harry has his moments in ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12302907/7/Si-Vis-Pacem-Para-Bellum Si Vis Pacem, Para Bellum]]''.
-->'''Madam Pomfrey:''' Now, I have learned that your family is not the most...\\
'''Harry:''' Lots of words could go there.
** And again when discussing their "self-defense lessons".
-->'''Luna:''' [Hermione] flew like a blibbering humdinger.\\
'''Ron:''' How does a humdinger fly?\\
'''Harry:''' Apparently twenty feet threw the air and headfirst into a wall.

[[AC: ''LightNovel/HighSchoolDXD'']]
* Roland in ''Fanfic/RudeAwakeningRedux'' certainly qualifies. Seekvaira shows some of this too when Roland is around.

[[AC: ''Literature/TheHungerGames'']]
* This trope abounds in ''Fanfic/SomeSemblanceOfMeaning''. There's [[MouthyKid Kit]], [[FieryRedhead Fen]], [[TheHero Vale's]] sister [[HotBlooded Maybelle]]... Even [[ShrinkingViolet Vale]] herself can dish out some pretty good snark, especially when she's in {{Tsundere}} mode when dealing with [[JerkWithAHeartOfGold Obsidian]]. But the biggest example of all would have to be [[TheCynic "the pragmatist"]]--[[HearingVoices the ever-present voice in the back of Vale's head]].

[[AC: ''WesternAnimation/JackieChanAdventures'']]
* In ''FanFic/QueenOfAllOni'', there are numerous moments of snark, just like in canon.

[[AC: ''VisualNovel/KatawaShoujo'']]
* In ''Fanfic/FromShizunesPerspective'', Shizune may be one in canon, but Misha becomes one in here, as the author suggests that [[AlternativeCharacterInterpretation she would act that way in sign language-only conversations]]. At one point, Shizune becomes suspicious because [[OOCIsSeriousBusiness Misha is not snarking at her]].
-->'''Misha''': Need a little help there, Shicchan?
-->'''Shizune''': Eat me.
-->'''Misha''': No thanks, [[IncompatibleOrientation I already told you I don't go that way]].[[note]]This was written before the full game and TheReveal about how Misha felt about Shizune[[/note]].
-->'''Shizune''': Your loss. Too late for you anyway; I'm over my big girl phase. (Misha laughs)

[[AC: ''Franchise/KingdomHearts'']]
* The alternate version of Saix in ''Fanfic/TheReluctantFatherUniverse'' is this instead of the JerkAss he is in the game.
-->'''Saix on American Football''': Axel, it's a stupid sport where men overcompensating for their low intelligence run into each other at high speeds and then beat each other to the ground.

[[AC: ''WesternAnimation/TheLandBeforeTime'']]
* Pretty much all of the sharpteeth in ''Fanfic/TheSevenHunters'' fit this trope. Chomper's parents are also very snarky in their interactions with one another.

[[AC: ''Disney/TheLionKing'']]
* A lot of characters in ''Fanfic/TheLionKingAdventures'' are this.
** The Interceptor has his moments. Especially with Virusi.
-->'''The Interceptor:''' Oh, I'm so scared of your girly little nails!
** Nala, too.
-->'''Nala:''' Let's see you come up with something smart, [[WesternAnimation/EdEddNEddy Mr I-Know-Everything-About-Nothing!]]
** Predictably, Scar.
-->'''Scar (at the thought of teaming up with Hago again):''' Where did that get us last time? Oh, yeah… it got me exiled to this filthy, infested jungle!
** Zazu.
-->'''Zazu:''' This is getting tiresome. I'd love to stay and chat, discussing how the names of all my family members are ridiculous and all, but I'm afraid your parents have requested that you are present when they leave.
** Simba has a few moments in ''Dead as a Dodo''.
-->'''Simba:''' That would explain why you're no fun.
-->'''Zazu:''' I heard that.
-->'''Simba:''' Yeah, well you were supposed to.
*** And later:
-->'''Nala:''' Now, if we killed somebody - [[spoiler: and we have]] - what would we do?
-->'''Simba (half-heartedly): Run around screaming and crying?

[[AC: ''Franchise/TheLegendOfZelda'']]
* In ''[[FanFic/LegendOfZeldaRingsOfDualty The Legend of Zelda: Rings of Dualty]]'', protagonists Link and Samba get their moments, as do various [=NPCs=]. Most humor comes from LampshadeHanging, though.
-->'''Link (after Samba advises him to use explosives to beat a beamos)''': But we're knee-deep in goron territory and have yet to find a bomb. [[LampshadeHanging Notice that little cosmic joke yet?]]

-->The blonde dropped her jaw. "Well, that was, [[ValleyGirl like]], really rude," she commented.
-->"Yeah, sneaking past all the OTHER guards instead of going and asking the FIRST one's pretty rude," the man scoffed.
* ''Fanfic/WhenTheBrushHitsTheCanvas'': Link usualky is the snarkiest guy around, but a few other characters get on it as well.
-->'''Zora guard''': Go ahead. Try avoid getting blasted. Or eaten. Or catching a terminal cold that may spell the end of your swimming endeavors.

[[AC: ''Manga/MaidSama'']]
* Sarakshi, Marjani and Tora from ''FanFic/{{Seduction}}'' will often engage in [[SnarktoSnarkCombat Snark-to-Snark Combats]]. Some examples:
--> '''Sarakshi:''' Your shirt smells of grass.
--> '''Marjani:''' That is a highly flattering compliment, Sarakshi. I don't know how I've survived so far without it.

--> '''Tora:''' Who do you think Hoseki's representatives would believe? One of the maids from a café that has done a grand event for the first time, or the well-mannered and chivalrous Igarashi heir?
--> '''Sarakshi:''' Well-mannered. Chivalrous. Excuse me while I gag, Igarashi.
--> '''Tora:''' I'm sure something as unattractive as that would be right up your street.

[[AC:''Franchise/MarvelUniverse'']]
* In ''Fanfic/APrizeForThreeEmpires'', ComicBook/CarolDanvers' mother's sarcasm proves to be unexpectedly sharp.
-->'''Marie Danvers:''' Right. Should have, should have. That's a really useful phrase, isn't it, Carol? Bound to be a million uses for it. I should have gone to college. I should have been a working wife. I should have this, I should have that. I should have won ten million dollars in the lottery. But you know what, Carol? I didn't.

[[AC:VideoGame/MegaManClassic]]
* In ''FanFic/MegaManDefenderOfTheHumanRace'', [=ProtoMan=] often makes snarky comments about Wily's plans or new 'bots he's building.

[[AC: ''WesternAnimation/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic'']]
* ''[[FanFic/EakinsHardReset Hard Reset]]'' is told in the first person from Twilight's perspective. As the time loop starts to get to her she becomes more and more like this.
* ''FanFic/HarmonyTheory'': Astrid telling Star that she [[SarcasmMode regrets becoming an "unstoppable badass" instead of learning "egghead language"]] shows her to be this.
* The eponymous ''FanFic/MidnightGreen''.
* Pretty much the most defining characteristic of TD from ''FanFic/TheNonBronyverse''. In one of the non-canon transformation stories, he even gets this as an official job title.
* Shining Armor is this in his self titled arc of the ''Fanfic/PonyPOVSeries'', which he calls 'Classic Equestrian Wit'. The fact he [[WeirdnessMagnet finds himself in crazy situations all the time]] gives him plenty to snark about.
** Apparently, the Royal Guard handbook actually encourages this.
--> '''Shining Armor''': However, the Royal Guard Regulations state in Rule Four Hundred and Nine, that 'in face of overwhelming stupidity, an officer is permitted to deploy sarcasm'(I appreciate the Princess' understanding of our position).
* [[http://www.fimfiction.net/story/73406/rainbow-in-the-dark Brownie gives us]] some rather witty examples in the early chapters of ''FanFic/RainbowInTheDark''.
* In ''Shadow Snark'' the titular character is, as expected, very snarky.
-->Shadow Snark: You're sending me to that backwater semi-racist insane asylum to learn about friendship?
-->Princess Celestia: See this is why you're leaving.
* The protagonist of ''FanFic/SophisticationAndBetrayal'' has a habit of snarkily lampshading the weirdness found within Equestria. His marefriend Rarity is also quite fond of responding to his antics with snark.
* Navarone in ''FanFic/DiariesOfAMadman'' could almost make a career out of doing this. Celestia and Taya show a lighter version of this, usually responding to his antics with the occasional dry and snarky remark.
* In ''Fanfic/TheWitchOfTheEverfree'', Sunset has her moments.
-->'''Twilight:''' Sometimes I don’t sleep for days!
-->'''Sunset:''' I usually sleep at nights myself.
* ''FanFic/TheFlashSentryChronicles'': Flash is one, big time. He loves mocking his opponents and making quick jokes about stuff they said. It's much like Spider-Man, only not with as much punch.
* Celestia has a moment in ''[[https://www.fimfiction.net/story/257926/1/below-average/talentless Below Average]]'' when Starlight Glimmer tries to make her lower the sun despite having lost her cutie mark.
-->'''Celestia:''' Oh dear, it doesn't seem to be working. I wonder why. Was there anything else or can I go back to my passive resistance now?\\\
'''Starlight Glimmer:''' You mean you can't control the sun anymore?\\
'''Celestia:''' What did you think my special talent was?

[[AC: ''Manga/{{Naruto}}'']]
* The narrator of ''Fanfic/KakashisKid'' exhibits this in spades. Unfortunately, she keeps most of her comments to herself in order to keep her cover.
--> Had my face not already been implanted in the floor, I would have done said action immediately.
--> ANBU Sparrow: "I never fail interesting missions." Nothing like reassurance, eh?

* Several members of the cast of ''Fanfic/KitsuneNoKenFistOfTheFox'' get a shot at this here and there, but one of the main ones is Shikamaru, usually in response to Ino's nutty antics or Choji's appetite. There's also Jugo, regarding anything Suigetsu does, or Kushina, who never fails to take the occasional pot-shot at her own son Naruto.

[[AC:''Anime/NeonGenesisEvangelion'']]
* ''Fanfic/ACrownOfStars'': Many characters are excellent at snarking. Asuka may get quite sarcastic due to her hellish past prior to the fic -fortunately she becomes less caustic and less bitter throughout the story-, but the whole Avaloni civilization loves snarking. And the Emperor is a master at it:
-->'''Ching''':''“This is an Army show, sir. I’m here as a volunteer, friend, and doc, not as a naval officer. And it’s your Empire. You could put a purple-arsed baboon in command, and I’d just salute.”''\\
'''Daniel''':''“Duly noted; I’ll make sure your next commanding officer is an unusually colored simian, just for you,’''
* ''Fanfic/AdviceAndTrust'': Everyone gets a few licks here and there, but highest marks have to go to off-her-sedatives Rei and her comments on her friend Asuka's clandestine affairs.
-->'''Rei''':''"No, I am not 'fucking with you.' That is Ikari-kun's job."''
* ''Fanfic/TheChildOfLove'': After [[spoiler:tripping Gendo,]] Rei delivers an excellent bit of snark:
-->''"You should look in front of you when you're running like that."''
* In ''Fanfic/ChildrenOfAnElderGod'', Ritsuko is a very sarcastic person and is armed with a very dry sense of humor.
-->'''Ritsuko:''' Hmm. I see you're busy. When you two are done, I need to see Misato."\\
'''Misato:''' I was just trying to find out who his girlfriend is!\\
'''Ritsuko:''' I suppose he had it written on the inside of his underwear or something?
* ''Fanfic/DoingItRightThisTime'': After having gone through the Angel War and the end of the world and then travelling to the past, the three Children have gotten very, very sardonic.
** After having a short talk with Gendo:
--->'''Asuka''':''"Well, that was a touching family reunion,"''\\
'''Shinji''':''"Could've been worse. He could've forced me into the Eva to go fight the Angel with absolutely no training whatsoever because the only other pilot got put in hospital in a botched synch-test or something,"''
** Rei describes her confrontation with Gendo:
--->'''Shinji''':''"Figures. How much did you actually tell my father, anyway?"''\\
'''Rei''':''"Few details. Only that everything he had worked towards and everything he had put myself and his only son through had been for nothing, and that he would die alone and unmourned, rejected by the only person he had ever truly loved. [...] It was... cathartic,"''
** After seeing Rei's apartment for first time:
--->'''Asuka''':''"We spend hundreds of millions of dollars a week keeping the Evas running and they couldn't spring for the rent in a nicer part of Tokyo-3 than this?"''\\
'''Shinji''':''"That's the Japanese housing market for you,"''
* ''Manga/{{Evangelion 303}}'': Several characters snark occasionally. Main offenders are:
** Shinji -mainly in the first chapters-:
--->'''Asuka''': Ya know... You'd be a pretty good pilot if you knew how to control yourself...\\
'''Shinji''': Weirdest way of conceeding I've ever heard...
** Asuka:
--->'''Misato''': Now I want all of you out on the flightline at 1400 hours to greet him.\\
'''Asuka''': Will this be an official buttkissing, or can we blow sunshine at our own leisure? I think I'm getting my nails done this afternoon...
** Jessika:
--->'''Jessika''' (after Asuka has spent a long while complaining about "idiot Shinji"): Hey Asuka... What's the German word for boyfriend?\\
'''Asuka''': Depends... Could be "fester freund"... or simply "freund" if you were introducing him.\\
'''Jessika:''' Hmmm... I thought maybe "idiot" was the German word for it...
** Ritsuko is the biggest offender of this series:
--->'''Misato''': There are times when I really hate this job...\\
'''Ritsuko''': The better question is: Are there any times when you don't hate your job?
** Misato also has some good lines every so often:
--->'''Misato''': Alright kids, listen up. I got news!\\
(She excitedly tells them the news. Neither of them reacts or pretends to care)\\
'''Misato''': [[http://eva303.smackjeeves.com/comics/1748446/059/ On the edge of your seats, clearly]].
* In ''Fanfic/GhostsOfEvangelion'' Shinji and Asuka develop a pretty dry sense of humor.
** Asuka complains about Shinji showing her up:
--->'''Asuka:''' You always gotta one-up me, eh?\\
'''Shinji:''' Says the woman who's fluent in three languages, has two Ph.D.s, and does guest lectures at MIT and Harvard and other places on a regular basis.
** After Asuka almost dies when she delivers their daughter:
--->'''Shinji:''' You almost died, Asuka!\\
'''Asuka:''' (sighing) Yes, I'm aware. I was there, remember? But I'm fine now.
* ''Fanfic/{{HERZ}}'':
** Kensuke is real good at snarking, especially when he is around Asuka. His sarcastic remarks irritate her every time.
*** In chapter 1:
--->'''Kensuke''':''"Asuka, could you please just stop pacing around for a moment?"''\\
'''Asuka''':''"Aaargh! I'll make him suuuffer for this! Just you wait till I get back, Baka-Shinji..."''\\
'''Kensuke''':''"Don't whip him too hard this time, alright?"''
** Shinji is usually non-confrontational, but he has some good zingers. Such like when [[spoiler:Asuka said it was his fault she was pregnant again:]]
--->'''Asuka''':''"BAKA-SHINJI! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!"''\\
'''Shinji''':''"My fault!? Why is always my fault!?"''\\
'''Asuka''':''"Of course it's your fault! You're a male!"''\\
'''Shinji''':''"Oh yes! I suppose it's got nothing to with you throwing yourself at me almost every night for the last few weeks! And you kept insisting on being on top as well!"''
* ''Fanfic/NeonGenesisEvangelionGenocide'': Ritsuko has absolutely no sense of humor... but she has plenty sarcasm.
-->'''Ritsuko:''' It won't make you feel better, but she probably didn't last more than a few seconds before going into shock. She was never very resilient to begin with. Had their places been reversed, I have no doubt Asuka would have retained some consciousness right until—\\
'''Misato:''' God, Ritsuko\\
'''Ritsuko:''' Unfortunately, the Almighty is not very good with data retrieval.
* ''Fanfic/OnceMoreWithFeeling'': Because of his former life and his new confident attitude, Shinji has developed a very sarcastic, caustic sense of humor.
** After seeing his father's huge -and nearly completely empty- office:
--->'''Shinji:''' “I’m guessing you’ve never heard of Ikea”
* ''Fanfic/TheSecondTry'': Shinji isn’t usually sarcastic, but he gives some good one-liners once in a while:
** When Shinji and Asuka are picking a name [[spoiler:for their baby]]:
--->'''Asuka:''' Making two lists is double the amount to bicker about.\\
'''Shinji:''' (muttering) Since when do you mind to bicker about something?
** When [[spoiler:Shinji is arrested,]] he feels pretty snarky.
--->"You seem to feel rather brave today," he allowed himself to comment sarcastically, tugging demonstratively at the over-the-top three-layered handcuffs that still encased his wrists.

[[AC: ''Film/{{Newsies}}'']]
* In ''Fanfic/EvenTheScore'', {{Original Character}}s Ace and Streets are snarkers to the bone. Combined with Jack and Racetrack, all snarky hell breaks loose:
--> Ace: "Conlon...he called you Cowboy." Jack: "Yeah, so?" Ace: "So does he call ya that 'cause of your taste in hats, or what?"\\
Streets [referring to a bet]: "Can I get in on that?" Racetrack: "On whose side?" Streets: "Not yours."

[[AC: ''Manga/OnePiece'']]
* In ''FanFic/ThisBites'', Cross often internally panics when something panic-worthy happens. Externally, the only nervousness he usually shows is a fake smile; he often snarks about whatever they're going through.

[[AC: ''Franchise/{{Pokemon}}'']]
* Several characters in ''Fanfic/SilverBlood'' can be considered snarkers, but the most obvious and constant example is Silver. Though, growing up [[SurroundedByIdiots in Team Rocket]] certainly explains why this is his [[TheSnarkKnight default reaction to others]], at least in his thoughts.
--> '''Silver:''' I would feel so much cleverer if I didn’t solely do that because everyone else in the Team is apparently ''stupid.''
** Wally's also quite snarky, though it's [[SarcasticDevotee mostly reserved for Brendan.]]
* ''Fanfic/PokemonResetBloodlines'' has its fair share. The main one is ''Ash's Pokédex'' of all things.

[[AC: ''ComicBook/PowerGirl'']]
* ''Fanfic/AForceOfFour'':
** Franchise/WonderWoman's daughter Fury's wit is immensely dry:
--->'''Mala:''' I do not particularly relish what I must do to the cousin of Kal-L. She is, after all, the last woman of our race. It was a hope of mine, though an illogical one, I grant, that she might realize our position, join the alliance, and bear us the start of a new generation of Kryptonians.\\
'''Fury:''' In your dreams. Maybe in her nightmares.
** Like mother, like daughter:
--->'''Badra''': I am not so foolish as to relinquish my own advantage, Diana. Held by those man-joined chains, your power is negated. Freed, you might be a threat to me... so the fetters will remain until the time of your execution. Or should I say, your murder?\\
'''Wonder Woman''': Greater than you have tried. I assume you keep me alive to see your masterstroke? That's the usual pattern with you mediocrities.\\
'''Badra:''' Mediocrities? No, Diana, the murder of a planet will be more than enough to satisfy even the harshest standards of those in my profession. I will allow you and your daughter to see it. You will know that, with your world's passing, your husband, your mother, your Amazon sisters, and your friends will pass as well. Then we will kill your daughter before your eyes. And then we will kill you.\\
'''Fury:''' Yeah, yeah, yeah, we've heard it all before. Can't we just cut to the final reel, where we slap you back in jail, go back to the clubhouse, and crack a few corny jokes before the credits reel?

[[AC: ''Franchise/PowerRangers'']]
* ''[[WorldOfSnark EVERYONE]]'' who so much as comes anywhere near the main characters becomes this in ''FanFic/PowerRangersGPX''.

[[AC: ''Videogame/RagnarokOnline'']]
* Valkron of ''Fanfic/WarriorsOfTheWorld'' is the biggest offender considering that in some conversations nearly ''every other'' line of dialogue from him is snark. Someone in-universe even remarks his snarkery spreads out and infects people the longer they spend more time with him.
* Fanfic/RagnarokRagnaGuardian: ''Shiro'' of all people is one. Given that he's the least likely candidate for the OnlySaneMan, this is a shocker.

-->'''Shiro:''' If I wanted to kill myself, I'd climb to your ego and rocket down to your IQ.
** Roku, too, possibly from too much exposure to Shiro.

-->'''Roku:''' Yes, Reiko, it was me who stole the Piece of Chaos. ''Definitely'' not the guy who's actually looking for it or anything.

[[AC: RealPersonFic]]
* The four in ''Fanfic/WithStringsAttached''. Some examples:
-->John: "Why're you so bloody calm?"
-->George: "Because I'm a better person than you.”

-->The Hunter: “I warn you, children, I have little patience for fools.”
-->Ringo: “If you were a doctor, would you have little fools for patients?”

[[AC: ''WebAnimation/{{RWBY}}'']]
* Team JNPR in ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12854072/9/The-ProfessionARC The ProfessionArc]]'' decide to review recordings of their spars and offer advice to each other on how to improve. When it comes to [[TheAce Pyrrha]], their suggestions amount to things like taking better care of her weapons as Ren noticed a small dent in her shield just before Pyrrha smashed it into his face.
** When detailing their skills, Jaune wonders if Pyrrha's Semblance is even suited for combat given how adept she is at fighting without it and most with a combat oriented Semblance tend to rely heavily on them (like Weiss). Then he learns she can [[ExtraOredinary control polarity]].
-->'''Jaune:''' ''Or it can be something like that. Sure, why not - talented, hard working, with Semblance that is basically a giant middle finger to like 99% of all hunters.''

[[AC: ''Literature/ASongOfIceAndFire'']]
* In ''Fanfic/TheMerchantPrinceOfPentos'' quite a few characters are snarky, only that Ser Edmure takes the cake.
* ''Fanfic/RobbReturns'' has a number of examples:
** After Arya's [[MotorMouth long-winded tale to her family]] about how [[spoiler:Jon was possessed by the Old Gods]], a listening Tyrion comments that it was impressive how she said all that without breathing.
** Tywin tells a Septon that, should the Faith Militant even ''hint'' at surfacing in the Westerlands, he will have any man in it beheaded with a dull sword. Kevan's reaction?
--->Subtle.
** Archmaester Marwyn. When Archmaester Perestan asks why Lord Hightower is requesting a meeting with him, Marwyn replies he is not a mind reader.

[[AC: ''Series/StarTrekTheOriginalSeries'']]
* In ''FanFic/StepByStep'', Spock, per the norm. Kirk even refers to one of his comments as a "[[TheStoic Vulcan]] burn."
-->I do not show favoritism among my subordinates, [[TheMcCoy Doctor]], as that is both against Starfleet regulation and, in addition, quite illogical. Also, were I to for some undisclosed reason to show favoritism, it would most certainly not be towards ''you''.

[[AC: ''VideoGame/StarWarsTheOldRepublic'']]
* ''Fanfic/BloodAndHonor'': Vette loves poking fun at self-important Sith, stupid plans and the universe in general. Even a shock collar can't prevent her from taking jabs at her jailer.

[[AC:''ComicBook/{{Supergirl}}'']]
* In ''Fanfic/HellsisterTrilogy'', Dan Turpin is a sarcastic as ever:
-->'''Dan:''' Then call him and tell him to get his big blue bod to my precinct, on the double. Orion and his boys are back. And I don't want any more of my turf torn up like it was last time they were here. So get him here, so they can get out. Got it?\\
'''ComicBook/JimmyOlsen:''' Uh. Orion? The guy from the ''ComicBook/NewGods''?\\
'''Dan:''' No, I mean Paddy O'Ryan from County Cork. Of course, it's Orion from the New Gods! Now do it! Goodbye.

[[AC:''Franchise/{{Superman}}'']]
* ''Fanfic/SorrowfulAndImmaculateHearts'': Clark Kent, under cover of his reputation for being an innocent goody-two-shoes, which leads most people to assume that he can't have meant what he just said or realized how it came out. Lois is the one person who's certain he's doing it deliberately, and it drives her up a wall.

[[AC: ''Series/{{Supernatural}}'']]
* ''Fanfic/DownToAgincourt'' takes 2014-Castiel's tendency towards snark (insouciant, anyone?) and turns it UpToEleven.

[[AC: ''LightNovel/SwordArtOnline'']]
* In ''Fanfic/{{Nightblade}}'', this is Nick's favored form of communication. His InnerMonologue claims that after people have been exposed to him for long enough, they either develop this trait or start ignoring him, and it shows.

[[AC: ''Anime/TengenToppaGurrenLagann'']]
* This is Tsuuma's main trait, in ''Fanfic/TengenToppaGurrenSolvernia'', she never misses an opportunity to snark at Viral, even if when in the middle of a battle:
--> '''[[ProudWarriorRaceGuy Viral]]''': "My scars have history."
--> '''Tsuuma''': "Now, here you are, the most distinguished assassin of the empire, [[UltimateLifeform the ultimate life form]], [[{{Ubermensch}} the über-beastmensch of tomorrow]]!"

--> '''Tsuuma''' (after Kamina knocked him down): "I'm sure you're on the ground because you like it there."
** And if she's not being sarcastic, [[OOCIsSeriousBusiness better pay attention]].

[[AC: ''WesternAnimation/TotalDrama'']]
* [[TimeMaster Nasira]] in ''Fanfic/KeepersOfTheElements'' is the most notable snarker in the whole story.

[[AC: ''VideoGame/{{Touhou}}'']]
* Matt in ''Fanfic/{{FREAKINGENSOKYO}}'', especially on the subjects of murder and sadism. Renko has her moments as well.

[[AC: ''TabletopGame/Warhammer40000'']]
* In ''FanFic/TalesOfTheEmperasque'':
** An unnamed Administratum Master:
--->'''Emperor:''' [[NoIndoorVoice I WANT YOU ALL TO LISTEN VERY CLOSELY.]]\\
'''Administratum Master:''' I assure you that will be very easy, my Lord God.
** The picture made by one of the fans has another Lord of Terra snarking as well:
--->'''Emperor:''' (having just crashed a huge table) SORRY. YOU KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE.\\
'''Lord of Terra:''' Actually, I don't.
* In fancomic "[[http://eagleordinary.smackjeeves.com/ Eagle Ordinary]]", Commissar Fenstrum Holt is a grizzled, badass war veteran with a dry wit, a short supply of patience, and a bunch of vaguely-competent subordinates.
-->'''Holt:''' Is map reading a lost art?

[[AC:''Franchise/XMen'']]
* In ''Fanfic/XMenTheEarlyYears'', [[ComicBook/{{Cyclops}} Scott Summers']] sense of humor is drier than most of world's deserts.
-->'''Carol:''' So what have you been doing besides studying, Scott?\\
'''Scott:''' Well, on my off time, I've saved the world a couple of times from evil mutants. I joined a cult and then overthrew its leader because he was badly mistreating his people. That, of course, is after the head of the cult tried to sacrifice me to a demon. After I overthrew the old leader, the members of the cult voted me their leader. I made everyone get jobs and outlawed human sacrifice. I helped them fix up their boarding house and open a soup kitchen for the homeless in its basement. I also organized a band for them, and they're playing at the children's hospital cancer ward benefit next month. Other than that, not much; it's been a slow month.\\
'''Carol:''' (to Xavier) He's learning to express a sense of humor.\\
'''Xavier:''' Yes, Scott is learning to express a sense of humor; a very dry one.\\
'''Scott:''' (looking innocently) That's me, sir, life of the party.\\
'''Carol:''' All I have to do is teach you how to smile now.\\
'''Scott:''' Putting a smile on my face is like putting pastel colors on Wednesday Adams. Some things should just never be done.

[[AC:''Anime/YuGiOh'']]
* In ''FanFic/LoadedBones'', both Bakuras are this, especially when around Yugi and his friends.
-->"Anyway, the Ring's in my closet, remember?" said Yugi. "It can't do anything to him from in there."\\
The spirit sighed loudly inside Bakura's head. "And by such towering intellects am I thwarted."\\
''Says a fair bit about you, doesn't it?''

[[AC: ''Other'']]
* Books written by @/Iceaura39 tend to have tons of these.
** ''Literature/AesirCrossWars'' is practically snark central, with just about everyone having a witty remark to just about everything. Protagonist Azrael is clearly the snarkiest of them all, though.
** ''Literature/TheSpectrumGame'' has Inigo, also a protagonist. He probably had to be this to keep his wits about him, though, having spent months with the hilariously inept doctor.
** ''Literature/PhoenixHearts'': Clarisse.
*** Ciel downplays it for the most part. If someone manages to act dumber than him, however, they will receive a lashing from his tongue, which can be sharper than his blade at times.
----

[[AC: ''Series/PowerRangers'']]

[[AC''Franchise/MarvelUniverse'']]

[[AC: ''VideoGames/{{Touhou}}'']]

** Even Thor gets in on the act - something which isn't quite so surprising when you factor in that he was once James Potter.
** However, Loki, Tony, Darcy, and Harry Dresden are the chief snarkers. [[SnarkToSnarkCombat Dresden and Tony actually wind up in a snark-off.]] ''[[UpToEleven Asgardians were taking bets.]]''

* Jack Harmon and Daniel Lawson, [[OriginalCharacter OCs]] featured in ''FanFic/TheHarmonVerse'' live and breathe this trope.

* In ''Fanfic/EvenTheScore'', OCs Ace and Streets are snarkers to the bone. Combined with Jack and Racetrack, all snarky hell breaks loose:

** However, Loki, Tony, Darcy, and Harry Dresden are the chief snarkers. Dresden and Tony actually wind up in a snark-off. ''Asgardians were taking bets.''

* Books written by Troper/Iceaura39 tend to have tons of these.
** ''Story/AesirCrossWars'' is practically snark central, with just about everyone having a witty remark to just about everything. Protagonist Azrael is clearly the snarkiest of them all, though.

* Ethan Sunderland, aka [[VideoGame/FalloutNewVegas the Courier]], in [[FanFic/MassFoundations Mass Foundations: Redemption in the Stars]]. He makes sarcastic commentary on just about everything.

* ''Fanfic/SoulChess'' has a few. Namely Lelouch [[spoiler: in chapter 132, [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome making Aizen flip out]]]] and [[spoiler: Eien Tamashi, Lelouch's Zanpakuto; she channels C.C., the original snarker.]]

* Maggie Pesky in ''[[https://archiveofourown.org/works/17055872 The Buzz On How Maggie Got Fondled By Flecko]]'', often to the point of it [[HeroicComedicSociopath being]] [[SanitySlippage downright]] ''[[CreepyChild SCARY]]''.