This is an online community. All craftdwarfship is of the highest quality. It is encrusted with Dolomite, decorated with turtle bone and cave lobster shell and encircled with bands of Dolomite, Tower-cap and Rose Quartz. This object menaces with spikes of kitten tallow, adamantine and magma. On the item is an image of a dwarf and a computer. The dwarf is playing. The image relates to the creation of the Community Page for the online community.
When the last "overseer" made a pact with the HFS to bring down Headshoots by turning its 2 greatest champions into skeletons to kill the others, one dwarf hid in this room, taking supplies with him. He was allowed to live after the player found him by zooming to him.
Blue and Orange Morality: There is really no way to reconcile the kind of things that are considered "acceptable" and "unacceptable" among the community. We're just too far gone for simple concepts such as "morality" to matter any more.
Crazy Awesome: How many other games feature an elf becoming king of the Dwarves, then defeat a dragon with only a little skill with a hammer? In how many others games does a berserk Dwarf on fire proceed to beat all of the military, with each other?
The community itself. Dwarf Fortress fans are the kind of people to reject a simple, practical solution to a problem on account of it needing more magma. Threads will be spawned to discuss how Dwarfy the solution can be made, delving into realms of the impossible. Then someone will implement it and make it work.
Evilutionary Biologist: DF 2010 added genetics to the game. Cue players trying to selectively breed livestock and your dwarves to possess various physical traits. Why would you do this? Well, for livestock, for higher meat yields. But for Dwarves, it's probably just because players have determined they're going to run a Nazi-fortress and only keep dwarves with blond hair or some other arbitrary physical characteristic. And of course, For Science!!
It is also worth noting that rather than disallow this sort of thing somehow, which would be difficult (to say the least), Toady simply plans to implement AI that will allow the dwarves to become paranoid if mysterious accidents keep happening to certain portions of the population.
For Science!: Members of the online fan community, when asking about something that's never been tried, are implored to do it FOR !!SCIENCE!!!note Like science, but with more magma, screaming, and Fun Dwarven science has already accomplished a number of interesting feats with the game engine which the developer probably never had in mind.
It's also said that anything that is ludicrously hard to build and completely pointless and useless is considered EXTREMELY dwarven. The more useless it is, the more your prestige will be enhanced. This has led to some pretty silly things, known as "Stupid Dwarf Tricks", some of which include a massive tower made out of soap, projects to drain an ocean tile and a fully-functional, water-powered digital computer.
"I believe it is turing complete, for anyone who cares."
Possibly the most dwarven thing ever seen. It's a thread tracking the process of creating a viable means to create self-sufficient colony pods SUBMERGED IN MAGMA SEAS. HOLY SHIT. The Dwarf Physics abuse being used in these experiments led one user to comment:
"Considering the general state of DF, I think Einstein and Newton are already rotating fast enough (in their graves) that you could hook them up to pumps and use them to kill Elves."
A Magma Sea Colony Was later successfully created, through the equally dwarven method of draining the entire magma sea in order to "safely" construct the colony on top of the semi-molten rock.
In the culmination of Dwarven aerospace technology, a player has built a working Sky Fortress, suspended in mid-air by supports attached to the sky itself.
"My Armok... We've walled and roofed whole map tiles just because the sun irritated us. We've drained the magma sea and built a fort under it. We've drained the real sea, just to try and get at mermaid bones. We built a fort in hell just to prove we could. And now, we've built a fort in the sky. There is no natural obstacle a dwarf has not overcome."
For the Evulz: The other main motivation of Dwarf Fortress players, it usually manifests in building needlessly sadistic death traps for captured prisoners. Or sometimes nobles.
God Save Us from the Queen!: Played straight in Battlefailed, with Queen Led Shakeoars, human monarch of the dwarves. She does worship a number of monsters and gods of death and is implied to send dwarves to the fort as a form of genocide.
Good Bad Bugs: A handful of bugs from the old 2D version received names due to their humorous nature.
Contents Under Pressure: melting a bolt or arrow down for scrap resulted in 30 bars of metal instead of 1/30th due to a * instead of / in the code.
Love Conquers All: chained animals break free upon spotting their trainers.
The Most Dangerous Game & We All Fall Down: Both involved the removal of the floor on which a dwarf was standing, either by himself or another.
You and What Army? If you embarked on goblin tower, then soon abandoned (or all 7 dwarves died), then went and reclaimed the fort, the game would calculate the fortress wealth including all of the goblin loot, making the reclaim a force of 150 dwarves or more.
Infinite Blood/Mud aka Wipe Your Feet: mud and blood as pseudo-liquids had a "wet" flag that when a dwarf stepped on it they'd track it a few squares, which would then also be marked as wet, and as it took so long to dry dwarves would re-wet squares with other squares causing an eventual takeover of the entire fort. Bridges and Grates over open space "wiped off" the dwarves feet, containing the mess. This is making a, hopefully fixed, return in the next version.
Buff Swimmers: any creature that naturally swam raised their Swimming skill, and due to the total exp of all skills being used to calculate attributes, natural swimmers ended up supernaturally strong. In the earlier versions this led to Carp being regarded as the worst thing to find in your water supply, ever...
Endless Quiver: A "feature" has been discovered that lets a marksdwarf carry a quiver with thousands of arrows, making him a one dwarf army, since crossbows fire like machine guns.
31.01 version had its own named bug already: Acid Rain. That is to say, dwarves melting in the rain. It appears that the "fat" tissue layer's melting point was set to 110░ F (43░C) in the raw files, meaning that even overly hot summer weather would cause all of your fat to melt and drip off your body, resulting in massive bleeding until you died of blood loss.
<Name>, Dwarven Baby cancels Clean Self: Too insane. Apparently the data flag that marks a dwarf as being a baby (and therefore unable to do things like, say, cleaning itself) is bunched up with the ones marking various kinds of insanity, for some reason.
A 2212 z-level spire of raw adamantine. Turned out to be due to the game failing to remove existing data from memory when generating a new world (in particular, doing a Search from one world and aborting the embark would leave map feature data files hanging around, and generating a new world would merge them in). Said bug also resulted in oddities such as a cavern layer being generated in midair, mountains made of magma instead of stone (occasionally with adamantine spires of their own at the centre), and large chunks of the ground collapsing for no obvious reason. In all these cases, physics started applying to them immediately upon embark, withpredictableresults.
In-Universe Game Clock: One player built a fortress which contains a Dwarf-powered clock, synced to the actual game time.
Speaking of beating things to death, there's the awesome story of Nist Akath (which started in version 0.27.169.33a and progressed all the way to version 0.28.181.40d) which, among other things like surviving on a haunted glacier full of skeletal elks, includes the story of Captain Ironblood, a dwarf so mighty he was able to kill a Hydra with nothing but his hands, while covered in nothing but all the vomit and other fluids covering him, and then proceeding to very easily kill the treacherous baron (and his wife) who'd attempted to kill him. A bit lengthy yes, but certainly a good read. Whether or not you should fear the winter (as the fortress is named), or the armed dwarves of Nist Akath is another matter entirely.
Another notorious one is Headshoots which is notable for three things:
Two champion dwarves who, due to the bug which removed the cap limit, became so overpowered that were practically invincible. One of them preferred to fight by beating enemies to death with a backpack, and once waded over a stream of magma to kill a kobold thief.note Though her artifact adamantine armor may have had something to do with that last part.
In defiance of the game's motto, nothing, including intentional sabotage from the rulers late in LP, seems to be able to totally destroy the fortress, even in the situations where the UBER-PWNING powers of above champions were useless.
Bobbin Threadbare, the SA Goon - Headshoots: So Metal That Killing It Just Made It Stronger.
The ending, when the last ruler turned above champions into skeletons. The slaughter of the fortress and final duel between them was magnificent.
The current (now archived) fort, Syrupleaf, may be even more insane than all the previous forts put together. For the first few years, they managed to survive without any water (They're stationed in the bottom left corner of the world map, in the midst of a frozen wasteland that is nigh-impossible to approach in Adventure mode.) They created a single golden boot (Which was magnificently roleplayed, as it was the current leader of the succession game who went into a fey mood to craft it.) Numerous Shout Outs and Continuity Nods to the previous major fortresses: The disastrous Boatmurdered and the demon-corrupted Headshoots. In fact, one of the major adversaries the fortress faces is The Spawn, which are modified dwarves/undead. In-character, they're undead dwarves, powered by a clump of magma, who serve underneath Holistic Detective - Wielder of the Rat Leather Bag, God Amongst Dwarves, and the surviving Demonic Dwarf of the legendary battle between Hollistic and Nemo. Also among the thread are the various journals of the The various dwarfed goons, who go in-character and comment on the current situation as describe in the update. Insane. Awesome.
The beautifully illustrated story of Bronzemurder (not to be confused with the aforementioned Boatmurdered) has been making its rounds across the internet, a brief little tale of a small mistake resulting in much fun.
Battlefailed became the self-appointed "Boatmurdered of DF2010", and, to its credit, did a terrific job of living up to that lofty title. Started as the (entirely co-incidental) combination of a genocidal plot by Jerk Ass human queen of dwarves, Led Shakeoars and the gambit of an incredibly ancient body-surfing sorceror. Seven dwarves ended up on the hellish coastline separating the Plains of Ooze from the Blueness of Malodors. Only halfway through the first turn, most of the original dwarves and a good chunk of the immigrants were either dead or dying. Ten turns in and the fortress was an Escher-like nightmare of tunnels, shafts and stairwells leading nowhere, under constant assault from fifty identically-named goblins, forgotten beasts and hordes of undead grazing animals. Eventually, parts of the fort started leaking water or magma for no apparent reason, occasionally in places that it should not have been possible for water or magma to be. Extinction-level events that would kill up to half of the population became not only frequent but regular.
When Battlefailed fell, there were attempts to reclaim it and continue the awesome. They failed, the fort was flooded beyond belief and apparently no longer playable. They gave up and made Failcannon nearby. But then several month later. This happened.
Matul Remrit is also notable. There's a complex ongoing storyline, with each chapter told from the point of view of a different dwarf. It's also illustrated, both with drawings and screenshots from the Stonesense 3D-fortress-viewer.
Drunkenwhims of Artifice is a currently ongoing fort that is already shaping to be pretty awesome. In the first few turns Kobolds have become a serious threat to the fort, they have survived a tantrum spiral, and enslaved a dwarf inside the lever room.
Deathgate lacks some of the insanity and massive bloodshed that made Boatmurdered and Syrupleaf epic. It makes up for this by colonizing hell.
Obok Meatgod, former Memetic Badass, had the details of his exploits expunged from the forums after... Well, You Do NOT Want To Know. But you're going to ask anyway, so... The player controlling him modded in genitals, and used them to have his adventurer... interfere with a captured goblin child. Told you you didn't want to know.
And then there's the infamous "Goblin Fortress" mod, which sounds innocuous but really, really wasn't. You'll regret highlighting this, but... It reimagined goblins as a One-Gender Race of dominatrixes, made it possible to buy other sentient races as pets and changed all the Vendor Trash into sex toys. So far, So Bad, It's Good; it was too ridiculous to be really offensive. But then the fan art started coming in and it was all downhill from there.
Memetic Badass: Captain Ironblood, Morul, ┬sax the Monster-slaying Cave-swallow-man, and the Elf King of the Dwarves, Cacame Awemedinade (who's most notable for being considered the only elf that's loved by most of the fanbase).
Forum user Footkerchief certainly qualifies. His ability to find information you're looking for is so great that he's often referred to as the search function itself.
Was alternate dimension tested against all of the legendary adamantine equipped military and won without a single scratch. Investigation proved that due to fanatical training, he had acquired a skill of 130 out of 15 (15 is legendary), much more powerful than either of the champions of Headshoots above. The fort leader is planning to see whether he can kill the clowns solo.
Vanod Openfires, naked, human, last of his kind, carrying only a copper spear. Dedicated to exploring every inch of the only dry land in the world, the monster-haunted island Elifa Adapi, and killing every single inhabitant. And then eating them, if possible.
Nice Job Fixing It, Villain: A loose example of this can be found in the reclaim of Battlefailed. The various poisons and dusts which permeated the Fortress of Old Battlefailed became the new fortress's best defense; while the poisons killed all of the dwarves livestock and any dwarves dumb enough to take off their shoes, it stopped countless barefooted Kobold invaders and about a dozen forgotten beasts.
Noodle Incident: For newer members to the Bay12 Forums, the deleted Various Nonsense Subforum can be this. Most of the senior members of the community seem reluctant to talk about it, besides cryptic offhand notes involving Penguins and Inter Subforum Invasions.
One Dwarf Army: In the LP Headshoots, a dwarf became so ridiculously powerful that when a band of kobolds arrived, said berserking dwarf waded through a pool of magma to reach them. And was completely unharmed. Sadly the kobolds fled before the dwarf in question could reach them, leaving her to console herself with single-handedly butchering a dragon. Also without being harmed.
Also, the programmer. Yes, the one programmer.
Captain Ironblood. He killed a hydra. While naked and unarmed. He's also taken on 80+ orcs and won. But then again, almost any of the champions of Nist Akath qualify.
One dwarf in Syrupleaf punted a warhorse over a mountain. And then proceeded to beat seven kinds of it out of the Frost Giant that had been riding said horse until it was suddenly punted out from under him. With a backpack.
Everyone in the military in Towersoared eventually becomes one, but especially Derm.
Headshoots' WEAPON, which even the creator doesn't fully understand. Its first activation set half the fortress on fire. Later upgraded to TRIBUTEWEAPON with even more catastrophic results. A fire sprinkler system using magma raining all over the map.
There was also a freezing-water-based one named WEAPON ICE FUCK, but that project was apparently abandoned once the player discovered the climate was too warm for it to work properly.
Headshoots also includes a drainage system specifically designed to drown nobles... and everyone else, if the wrong door is left open.
And a device to unleash all the cats in one go. The various succession players seemed to enjoy making these and forgetting to tell anyone about them. This of course is half the fun.
I added two levers. One opens the magma. The other sets free all the cats.
The SparkGear series of succession forts, now in its 6th incarnation, also seem fond of this.
Oddly enough, inverted in one SparkGear: The overground fortress/town had a large complex that would cause random explosions, killed a few dwarves in its construction, and had to be micromanaged just to keep it from flooding the place with magma - while it was idling, not to mention in use. Its purpose was to provide water on a glacier.
Syrupleaf, quite oddly, seems to lack a suitable one of these. MOLENAROK comes the closest, unleashing 60 or so giant Moledogs to tear apart invaders like a feral wolf pack. It hasn't been used very successfully, though. GLACIERASER had potential for this, and would have possibly melted the entire south pole had it worked, but failed to. Even now, the goons clamor for a suitably apocalyptic superweapon for Syrupleaf.
Battlefailed had FAILCANNON, a device intended to sluice anything that came near the front gates with water, and lived up to its name by spectacularly failing to drown the many goblin invaders that besieged the fortress, succeeding due to a mechanical failure only in drenching a couple of elk. The final administrator attempted to create a similar weapon for the deployment of magma, which he named FAILCANNON PRIME, but the fortress was torn apart by a Forgotten Beast before he was able to complete it.
Against all odds (more likely, because of them) Battle Failed has been reclaimed. FAILCANNON LIVES!!!
To quote from the forums "FAILCANNON will be able to shoot both hot and cold running fail."
Toady One: It's really hard to say what an ETA is on this thing, but we're basically just going now until it's fun enough to release. It's certainly not now, I mean, if you go down into a dungeon they're very barren.
Taking You with Me: Many times, fortresses that are invaded and have no chance of survival will send a miner to intentionally release the HFS out of sheer spite, which will kill the fort entirely but will also slaughter all the invaders.