This is a list of tropes found in bad fanfiction! Actually, its the character sheet for The Game of the Gods. These 33 Mary Sue characters are the pawns of Morgoth, and they will corrupt Middle-earth! Yet they are just pawns, so they are easy to remove from the board. If you have read or discussed bad fanfiction, these characters may seem too familiar.All spoilers are unmarked. This character sheet reveals how everyone died.
Anjara is an exile. She must return to Middle-earth, where she is the rightful ruler of both Gondor and Mirkwood. The portal to Middle-earth is a television playing the DVD of The Fellowship of the Ring.
Bag of Holding: Anjara has a "extra-light magical backpack". It's big enough to hold a microwave oven and a skateboard.
Crazy-Prepared: With an emphasis on the "crazy". As noted, she plans to take a microwave oven to Middle-Earth, which is not known for ready access to electricity.
Half-Human Hybrid: Anjara is a half-elf, born to Aragorn's father and Legolas's mother.
Rightful King Returns: Anjara intends to take the thrones of Gondor and Mirkwood from her half-brothers. This is really Morgoth's plan to replace the rulers of Gondor and Mirkwood with a Mary Sue.
Television Portal: Anjara wants to visit Middle-earth inside her television. Reality Ensues, and Anjara crashes into the TV and suffers a fatal head injury.
Mirrililli is an elf from Lothlórien, in yet another Legomance. She wants Legolas, the prince of Mirkwood, and feels certain that she will win his love, because she is "such a beautiful girl". Mirrililli enters Mirkwood to search for Legolas.
Friend to All Living Things: After Mirrililli has died, Morgoth tries to invoke this troke, insisting that "forest animals" would have aided Mirrilli.
Love at First Sight: The one-way version. Mirrililli saw Legolas "one day two centuries ago, and since then she had been unable to forget him."
Evil Gloating: Just enough to doom herself. Sauronia has a chance to kill Gandalf, but decides to "have some fun". She asks Gandalf for Any Last Words, and then reveals that she is the daughter of Sauron. With that info, Gandalf argues that Sauron is a giant red eye with no body, who has no way to impregnate Sauronia's mother, therefore Sauronia cannot exist. A literal "puff of logic" destroys Sauronia.
Xacanythia is the world's last dragon. While Dreaming of Things to Come, she learns that a hobbit named Bilbo will come to Mirkwood. The dream inspires her to leave her treasure hoard and fly to the assistance of the characters of The Hobbit.
Heel-Face Turn: Xacanythia had attacked dwarves and stolen their treasure. That was evil. Now she wants to do good and help Bilbo.
Last of Her Kind: She's the world's last dragon, but that's wrong! Smaug, the dragon from The Hobbit, is still alive.
Our Dragons Are Different: Xacanythia is different, but Smaug is still his same, canonical and evil self. Xacanythia has "breath of purest light", but Smaug uses his fire breath to roast and eat Xacanythia.
Too Dumb to Live: One of the worst examples among the many Sues that qualify. Even Morgoth, who usually loudly protests the fate of his Sues and accuses Varda of cheating at the drop of a hat, is reduced to admitting that someone who treated dragons as friendly in a setting where they're violent, greedy Always Chaotic Evil monsters couldn't have ended up any other way.
Voluntary Shapeshifting: She can take the form of a dragon, or a winged elf. Morgoth justifies this by claiming that long ago, "the dragons had not yielded to evil and could still assume the forms of Elves."
Arwen Undómiel is a character from canon, but now her mind is different. Sue!Arwen feigns love for Aragorn, the King of Gondor, but she secretly hates him. Her father forces the marriage, but Sue!Arwen plots to kill her new husband and steal the throne of Gondor.
Demonic Possession: Morgoth forgot that Arwen's grandmother is Galadriel, who can do Telepathy. Galadriel sees the ghost inside Arwen, and expels it, thus restoring the canon version of Arwen.
Goth: Sue!Arwen is a stereotypical "Gloomy Goth" who wears "thick black makeup" and "bright red lipstick", but only when she is alone and no one else can see her.
Possession Sue: Invoked by Morgoth. Arwen is from canon, so Varda can't just kill this character.
Til Murder Do Us Part: Arwen, with a knife, in the bedroom, would kill Aragorn. The marriage would have lasted part of a day.
Changeling can reshape her body, into a form that might win love. She takes an opportunity to become a female hobbit and charm both Aragorn and Legolas.
She went walking through the camp like a fallen star, and all around her Elves and Men bowed and gave way. Some who had never yet stopped marveling at the risen star of Eärendil turned to her, looked on her beauty, and began to weep, casting themselves to their knees, marveling that Eru himself in female form had descended from the heavens.
Deirdre did not notice the adulation; she was too modest for such things.
Only the Pure of Heart: By Varda's logic, Deirdre is a Mary Sue, so she must be evil. Deirdre dies when she touches the Silmarils that burn evil.
Kaleidoscope Eyes: "She had glinting eyes that shifted colors with her moods, from bright gold when she was amused, to the soft gray that they were now, echoing the color of the sorrowful sky."
Juliardianselaáfalayu started as a villain under Morgoth and slayer of elves. Then she became Flower-of-fire, opponent of Morgoth and friend of elves. This conflict between two personalities causes her angst. When Morgoth returns to the world, Flower-of-fire withers, as Juliardianselaáfalayu comes to fight for Morgoth.
Enemy Within: The evil Juliardianselaáfalayu has, within herself, the good Flower-of-fire.
Jekyll & Hyde: The good Flower-of-fire and the evil Juliardianselaáfalayu are the same person, but the elves never suspect that Flower-of-fire is the villain.
Overly Long Name: Her name is so long, Fëanor invents a new script so that Juliardianselaáfalayu is only three letters long.
Lima Syndrome: She tries to invoke this. Juliardianselaáfalayu would capture Maedhros, then she would fall in love with her prisoner, and her sympathy for him would revive Flower-of-fire. Her attempt at capture fails when Maedhros kills her.
Love at First Sight: The one-way version: Juliardianselaáfalayu sees Maedhros and decides to love him.
Kennilista is the daughter of Haldir. Morgoth establishes that Haldir was the last King of Lothlórien, and Kennilista is the rightful heir. Morgoth justifies this claim by declaring that "King Elrond" backed Kennilista. The claim already contradicts canon; Kennilista fails to understand the way of elven royalty.
Back from the Dead: Fëanor snuck into the game and killed Kennilista a few times. Fëanor should not be there, so Varda allows Morgoth to just resurrect Kennilista when this happens.
Brainwashed: When Kennilista finds Haldir, she believes that Galadriel brainwashed Haldir to forget having been king and having a daughter.
Immortality Inducer: She has an "immortality necklace". This is redundant, because she is an elf, and elves are already immortal. Rose believes that she has Complete Immortality, but she is only one of The Ageless, and therefore, Saruman can still kill her.
Master of Illusion: Rose creates "an illusion of herself running away". Morgoth uses this to justify why Merry and Pippin escaped, but Rose remained captive.
Sailor Earth: She is a Tenth Walker. The fandom has many characters of this type, but Rose from chapter 15 is the first one to appear in The Game of the Gods.
Translator Microbes: When hearing orcs, "She couldn't understand their language, but a quickly whispered spell of tongues took care of that."
Swan is a half-human who lives among elves. She believes that she is ugly.
In truth, Amalinde knew full well that her daughter was beautiful, but she was jealous of her and wanted to keep Swan from seeing it as long as possible.
Dirt Forcefield: Morgoth uses this trope to describe Swan's great beauty. Nothing can subtract from her appearance: at most, she gets "a few scratches that always healed instantly".
Half-Human Hybrid: Swan is half-elf, half-human. Morgoth presents this as a reason to claim that Swan is ugly.
Murder-Suicide: Swan is the victim. Morgoth's opponent in this game is Celegorm. Swan's beauty seduces Celegorm. He flees into the game and soon seduces Swan. Celegorm kills Swan, then himself; because Celegorm wants to return to the afterlife, but bring Swan with him.
Prophecy Twist: In the prophecy, Swan will "marry a prince", but whom? Morgoth wanted Legolas (prince of Mirkwood), but Morgoth's opponent Celegorm (prince of Nargothrond) inserts himself into the story.
Gweniwen is the bodyguard of her uncle Théoden. She fights in the Battle of the Pelennor Fields.
Fictionary: Morgoth declares that Gweniwen is Elvish for "Maiden of Stone", but Morgoth's opponent disputes this. "Gweni doesn't mean 'stone' in Elvish." To fix this, Morgoth invents a "secret dialect" of Elvish where the translation is correct.
Hero Secret Service: Gweniwen is a one-woman secret service for King Théoden. The people don't know about her. She is also the heir, which means that if she fails and the king dies, she will become Queen of Rohan! Morgoth's opponent questions how a secret person can become the queen.
Lily is the daughter of Lord Foxbright, who orders her to marry Legolas. The arranged marriage with Legolas is a common plot in fan fiction. Lily wants out of the marriage, but immediately changes her mind when she glimpses Legolas.
Freak Out: With deadly results. "She promptly fell into an apoplectic fit, and died a few moments later."
Love at First Sight: As soon as Lily sees Legolas, she wants to marry him. This is a one-way love. Morgoth also wants Legolas to love Lily, but that doesn't happen.
Immanuela is a fan of the Left Behind books, and wishes to do a crossover with The Lord of the Rings. The Lord grants her wish and transports her to Middle-earth. She brings The Bible and the Left Behind books with her, and intends to spread Christianity in Middle-earth.
Belief Makes You Stupid: Immanuela tries to banish a Balrog with a prayer, but the Balrog just ignores her words and slays her.
Invocation: Immaneula uses prayer to invoke the power of the Lord. "In Jesus's name, I bid you begone!"
Bellatrona is a woman from Amazonia who somehow found out about the One Ring and rushed to join the quest. She must deal with Boromir, who is now a Straw Misogynist. This story parodies how fan authors cause Boromir to insist that women are useless, in order to make their own female characters seem more special.
Bling of War: When Bellatrona duels Boromir, she wears golden armor. The visual effect is perfect — "He just gaped at her." — but the gold is too soft to block Boromir's steel sword.
Does Not Like Men: Bellatrona hates all men. In her backstory, she crushed a rebellion by men who wanted to enslave all women.
Sailor Earth: She's another Tenth Walker, though often a flyer rather than a walker.
Seer: Turingethel can "see the future". This is Morgoth's excuse for why Turingethel knows everything about the plot.
Too Dumb to Live: Turingethel sees a crown in a lake, tries to grab it, and drowns herself. It is doubly dumb because the crown is really a constellation of reflected stars. So Turingethel drowned herself for something that wasn't there!
All Just a Dream: At the end, Mirandola is just a dream. Harry dreamed the whole story, so Harry is not really dead.
Defeat by Modesty: Mirandola attempts to defeat a man by casting "Alohomora!" to unlock his belt and lower his pants.
Friend or Foe: The Rangers of Ithilien decide that Mirandola is a foe, because she speaks no Westron. So they kill her.
Functional Magic: Mirandola's magic stops working, because the canon of Middle-earth imposes a different magic system. Magical Incantations are not in Latin. Only wise characters like Galadriel can read minds.
Zneirra Tal'Abluth is a drow (or dark elf) out of Forgotten Realms. She flees from her homeland and falls into Middle-earth, where she meets Legolas.
Expy: Zneirra is yet another clone of Drizzt. Most dark elves are evil, but Drizzt clones rebel against evil, and the other dark elves hate Drizzt clones. As well as Lloth, who unfortunately for her, can and does follow her to Middle-Earth, along with a bunch of her angry worshipers. Zneirra never stood a chance.
Fainting: "Zneirra fainted from sheer shock" when she discovered that Legolas is not her enemy, even though he is a faerie elf.
Love at First Sight: This time, it is the canon character who feels love for the Sue. Legolas looks at Zneirra and thinks that she might be "his One, his soulmate".
Unicorn: Yes, Raistlia rides a unicorn named Flowervale to Middle-earth.
Kitsune is a loud fangirl who likes both The Lord of the Rings and Japanese things. She somehow gets into Middle-earth, and tries to befriend everyone with her fangirl Japanese.
Captain Oblivious: Kitsune almost never notices that the other characters can't understand her fangirl Japanese. She supposes that characters cover their ears as a "kawaii" custom, not because she is too loud. She believes that her cat bites and claws her because the cat loves her.
A'mael is a servant. Since she was a child, she has felt love for Legolas. Morgoth wrecks her speech by trying to write her lines in Elvish. (Morgoth should already know Sindarin, but he seems to have forgotten it here!) This story parodies how some fan authors use the wrong Elvish language in their stories.
Gratuitous Foreign Language: Gratuitous because it isn't Sindarin. A'mael speaks a mixture of Grelvish, misspelled Quenya, Elvish from Forgotten Realms, and the chemical name melamine. (That's a typo on melamin, Grelvish for "my love".) Legolas also speaks this language.
Internal Deconstruction: Of the premise that Sues should be killed for the readers' entertainment. Manwë uses this chapter to demonstrate how, with a few judicious tweaks, Rapture ceases to be a Sue without ceasing to be.
The Medic: After Manwë is done with her, she's a healer and a pacifist.
Steel is the only male self-insert character in Morgoth's box. Fëanor releases him into Valinor, where he proceeds to fight the male Valar and charm the female ones.
The Ace: He is the ultimate fighter, the ultimate wizard, the ultimate lady's man.
The Casanova: Part of his all-round brilliance. No woman can resist him... or so he thinks.