Characters: Spinnerette

Cast page for main characters in Spinnerette.

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    Columbus Superheroes 

Spinnerette / Heather Brown

A grad student at "Ohio Research University" who works under Dr. Lambha. Thanks to an accident involving her klutzy ways and the doctor's new "prototype genetic infusion chamber," she has found herself imbued with superpowers derived from spiders. This includes having the proportional strength of a spider ("GIRL ABS!") and super-healing along with six arms and high-tensile spider thread that shoots out of the base of her spine. However, she's not the only superpowered person around.

  • Acquired Poison Immunity: Spinny appears to be immune to the rage-inducing toxins Captain Alberta snuck into the Canadian League's water supply, possibly due to her powers being derived from spiders.
  • Adorkable: She's a biology major and a klutz, so this trope shouldn't be surprising.
  • Alternate Self: She has one in the form of Silver Age Spinnerette.
  • Amazonian Beauty: She gets a Super Physique complete with larger breasts and "girl abs" after getting into a Freak Lab Accident that gave her four extra arms and some superpowers. She decides to fights crime with an outfit that covers most of her body but still manages to be very revealing due to its form-fitting nature so her muscles and curves are quite visible.
  • Ambiguously Bi: Shown to be crushing on Darien (who despite his appearance is a boy) early on in the story, but Bottom lefty gropes Mecha Maid every chance it gets. Later decides she is attracted to girls when confessed to by Mecha Maid. Comments that she hasn't felt anything around boys before, but this point is left alone after she and Mecha Maid start dating, so whether or not she is attracted to guys is up in the air.
  • Badass Bookworm: Though sometimes rather ditzy, the fight against Evil Spinnerette reminds us that she is quite competent in the book smarts department. Exploiting spider biology for a reverse cowgirl!
  • Becoming the Mask: To the point she can no longer picture life with only two arms and would rather die than live that way.
  • Breast Expansion: Lampshaded by Heather herself, though it's also possible that, given her increased musculature, her pectoral muscles are just pushing them out further.
  • Brought Down to Normal: she was temporarily brought down to two arms by Dr. Universe.
  • Character Development: The end of the Glass arc sees Heather become significantly more mature and pragmatic. After all, it's very difficult to imagine the Spinny of volumes past being so coldly and unhesitatingly willing to burn an antagonist to death with thermite.
  • Deal with the Devil: Downplayed, but she tries to make a deal with Dr. Universe that in exchange for curing Mecha Maid's ALS. As it is, she owes him a solid for saving her life, so long as it doesn't go against her morals.
  • Distracted by the Sexy: According to Word of God, Super MILF's breasts "transcend sex appeal" for her.
  • Ditzy Genius: Doesn't head into Idiot Hero territory, though despite being quite intelligent she is shown to be clumsy and headstrong.
  • Expressive Mask: The shape of the eye lenses changes to match her facial expressions.
  • Expy/Gender Flip: Of Spider-Man. Fitting in regard to the series' Affectionate Parody status.
  • Form-Fitting Wardrobe: Her spider silk costume is custom made. Her nipples show through, and her panties must really ride up in the back unless she's Going Commando.
  • Gayngst: Went through this after Mecha Maid confessed to her.
  • Girls Love Stuffed Animals: She has a pair of giant plush spiders that she often cuddles, one of which is named Mr. Webby.
  • Healing Factor: Can heal minor injuries in a manner of minutes.
  • Heroic Build: GIRL ABS! The spider silk superhero costume shows all of her many muscles.
  • Heroic Willpower: She's the first to break out of Delta Wave's puerile dream fantasy brainwashing, and Delta even commends her on it.
  • How Do I Shot Web?: Quite literally. Even after getting the hang of most of her powers, aiming her web is still proving tricky.
  • The Knights Who Say Squee: She was enthralled by Ben Franklin's origin story. It's clear that she thinks he's the coolest old guy ever.
  • Male Gaze: Early on in the story, her outfit is so form-fitting that her nipples are sticking out, also, her butt gets plenty of focus.
  • Multi-Armed and Dangerous: The most obvious effect of her powers.
  • Multi-Armed Multitasking: She can use her arms to perform several actions at the same time, and they (especially Bottom Lefty) tend to act on their own.
  • Mundane Utility: Using her own silk for knitting and making her costume.
  • Never Heard That One Before: Cracks about deodorant usage? How... original.
  • Never Say "Die": At first, Heather either can't face, or refuses to accept, the fact that Marilyn really doesn't have much time left, something which Marilyn finds quite frustrating, given that it makes talking about the matter with her very difficult. However, after a significant bit of wising up through Issue 18, Heather eventually makes her peace with Marilyn's mortality, imploring her not to rush to make her life any shorter.
  • Organ Autonomy: When not using them her extra limbs tend to act more or less on their own. Bottom Lefty is particularly... frisky around Mecha Maid.
  • Secret Identity Identity: To the point where she would rather die than lose her extra arms.
  • Shoot the Dog: Killing Col. Glass while he's down. At the end, even Heather recognizes that the only way to Make Sure He's Dead is to burn him to death while there's a chance, so she does what she has to do.
  • Spider-Sense: She doesn't have it, but she thinks she does or at least likes to pretend.
  • Super Strength: Those GIRL ABS aren't just for show.
  • Took a Level in Badass: Started off incredibly clumsy and incapable of putting up much of a fight, even with enhanced strength and six arms. She's gradually gotten better, to the point where she's even able to quickly incapacitate Mecha Maid and the rest of the Canadian Superheroes.
  • What Would Tiger Do: Asks herself this when Captain Alberta drugs the Canadians.
  • Wrong Genre Savvy: Though Heather knows she's in a superhero comic, is aware of all the various tropes that apply, and expresses Medium Awareness at times, she thinks she's in a straight example, and not an Affectionate Parody where Reality Ensues.

Mecha Maid / Marilyn Seong

A girl wearing an anime-inspired Meido outfit with the power to fly and shoot missiles. Turns out to be just a powered suit for a girl suffering from the very real ALS disease. While the suit (or more specifically, the headband) allows her to accomplish superhuman feats, the disease means she only has a couple years left to live. Korean and a big fan of the anime Mahoromatic, whence she got the inspiration for her outfit.

  • Action Girl: The definitive example early in the series, as she knows what she's doing.
  • A-Cup Angst: Is perturbed by Heather ogling Super MILF.
  • Anguished Declaration of Love: She's finally able to tell Heather how she feels at the end of Chapter 8, but the situation is less than ideal.
  • Badass in Distress: Whenever her armor is shut off, she ends up as this, often to be saved by Heather.
  • Batman Grabs a Gun: Equips her armor with high-explosive rounds, white phosphorus missiles, and a thermite self-destruct charge to take out Colonel Glass for good. Everything except the thermite charge fails, which Spinny thankfully takes to use on her own.
  • Berserk Button: She's quick to arm a missile on anyone who thinks to harm Heather.
  • Brick Joke and Wham Episode: There is a very good reason Marilyn's musical instrument of choice is the flute.
  • Cannot Spit It Out: Yes, she is interested in Heather. No, she isn't able to tell her until the end of Chapter 8.
  • Dark and Troubled Past: Her birth mother was held hostage and killed by Colonel Glass. Even worse is the possibility that Glass might be her birth father.
  • Disability Superpower: Her armour was originally developed to counteract her paralysis.
  • Driven to Suicide: After Heather kills Colonel Glass, Marilyn tearfully admits that she intended to use her own fight with the man to commit suicide and take Glass with her.
  • Expressive Headband: Most noticeably at the end of Chapter 8, her headband...flap...things go down when she's sad then flare up when she's angry.
  • Kaleidoscope Hair: In the first few pages of Issue 16 her hair goes from being purple to red due to an accidental coloring mix-up. A few pages later her hair goes from blonde in one panel to purple in the rest, before finally settling on the more plausible color black.
  • Fourfer Token Minority: Asian, lesbian, wheelchair-bound and terminally ill.
  • Handicapped Badass: Outside of her Powered Armor she's confined to a wheelchair with ALS.
  • Happily Adopted: By Park Seong.
  • Important Haircut: Very subtly in Chapter 8, when she reveals that she's been using parts of her suit 24/7 for months just to be able to breathe. Her hair, formerly long, black, and straight, is now shorter, and apparently identical in color to her Mecha Maid wig. (It's also disheveled, but that's likely because she's lying in a hospital bed on a respirator.) Word of God is that she dyes her hair purple and wears a black wig in public.
  • Mukokuseki: It's unlikely anyone would have known she was Asian if the comic hadn't told us. (Although that's only with her headset and armor on. As a civilian, her ancestry is more evident.)
  • Ninja Maid: Possesses superhuman strength (though her ALS makes her unable to utilize it without her armor), and has a number of maid uniforms she dresses up in.
  • Powered Armor: Developed by her father to help disabled people walk, and weaponized by her.
  • Precision F-Strike: Though usually calm and rational, she gets very frustrated with Heather's trademark pluckiness while trying to discuss the subject of her mortality.
    Marilyn: God damn it, Heather! Stop making this so hard!
    • These have become more frequent now that Colonel Glass has entered the story.
    Shit. Glass escaped
    I would have vaporized that son-of-a-bitch if you hadn't run in my way!
    Burn in Hell, you psychopath!
  • Reed Richards Is Useless: Invented a device that lets paralyzed people walk, and just uses it for crime-fighting.
    • She claims that she's afraid the tech would be used as a weapon. Given that Dr. Universe's backstory has this exact thing happened to him (U.S. military swooped in and tried to steal his research and kidnap his assistant), it's not all that ridiculous a fear.
  • She Who Fights Monsters: Seems to be slipping into this after her hunt for Colonel Glass.
  • Super Strength: Mecha Maid's superhuman strength derives not from her armor, but from her own muscles, augmented by technology in her maid headband. The armor itself provides weaponry and flight capabilities.
  • Taking You with Me: Equips her suit with a thermite self-destruct charge to kill Colonel Glass. However, when she tries to activate it, her suit, already heavily damaged from her fight with Glass, malfunctions and results in her receiving a nasty shock instead.
  • Tareme Eyes: In her upbeat super identity.
  • Teen Genius: Helped design her own Powered Armor.
  • Transparent Closet: Her attraction towards Heather is pretty obvious, especially for Sahira. However, she chooses to hide her true feelings from Heather.
  • Tsurime Eyes: In her melancholy civilian identity.
  • Tyke Bomb: While Marilyn was still in the womb, her biological mother was exposed to radiation by the North Korean government in order to produce another superpowered individual for the country.
  • Your Days Are Numbered: Comes with the territory of having a terminal illness.

Tiger / Jeff Coleman / Bla... um, never mind

Formerly a police officer who was given superpowers by the previous "Tiger" after he was shot during a robbery gone wrong. His main traits include super-strength and a short temper, but he knows a lot of hidden superhero history. His Canadian ex-wife divorcing him over his alter-ego lead to an irrational prejudice against Canadians.

  • Berserk Button: Many.
    • Being called 'Black Tiger'
    • Thinking his 'Spirit of the Tiger' is a euphemism for steroids
    • Any mention of Canada. He gets over the last one.
  • Charles Atlas Superpower: He is deeply angered by the idea that he gained his bulk via steroids rather than intense training and drinking lots of protein shakes. In the book-only Chapter 5, this is hinted to not be entirely true. The Spirit of the Tiger does indeed account for some of his musculature.
  • Doing In the Scientist: 'Spirit of the Tiger' is not a euphemism for steroids. It is a legitimate supernatural force.
  • Comes Great Responsibility: Ultimately why he continued to be a superhero despite his wife's protests.
  • Genius Bruiser: Is a skilled detective and the most reasonable of the Ohio Superheroes.
  • Hair-Trigger Temper: The most temperamental of the heroes introduced.
  • Heroic Build: The guy is a mountain of muscle with a relatively tiny head on top!
  • Huge Guy, Tiny Girl: Tiger is enormous, especially compared to Mecha Maid.
  • It's All My Fault: He has a tendency to take responsibility for the failings of his team. In Issue 12, it causes him to step down as their leader.
  • Lawful Stupid: Greta states that Tiger will uphold the law to the letter no matter what.
  • The Leader: He's the leader of the superheroes of Columbus Ohio. This is why he takes responsibility for the mistakes made by his two teammates.
  • Noble Bigot: Dislikes Canadians, but is willing to work together with the League of Canadian Superheroes despite his misgivings. Thankfully, he grows out of it.
  • Overprotective Dad: He sees Mecha Maid and Spinnerette more like daughters he has to protect than teammates to rely on and it clouds his judgement on missions. For this he is chewed out by the Canadians.
  • Take Up My Sword: Before his superhero career, he was a cop on the beat. He responded to a robbery gone wrong and found an old man mortally wounded. With a final comment of "You'll do nicely", the old man passed on the Spirit of The Tiger into Jeff... and then died.
  • Team Dad: He sees his teammates like his daughters and thus gets quite overprotective of them.

    Legion of Canadian Superheroes 

Green Gable

A descendant of the original Anne of Green Gables. Despite being a male, his family made him wear the girly outfit, on the basis that Green Gable is a Legacy Character passed from mother to child, and just because that child is a boy is no reason to end the tradition.

Werewolf of London, Ontario

A Canadian werewolf who usually goes by the name London. Annoyed that there aren't many high-level superhero jobs in Canada.

Katt O' Nine Tails

A French-Canadian catgirl with nine prehensile tails. According to Heather, she was working at an animal shelter and somehow found a magical cat that hid there since the War of 1812.

  • Artistic License – Biology: Katt's tails appear to emerge from her sacrum rather than her coccyx.
  • Bifauxnen: With her coat on she looks quite masculine.
  • Bi the Way: Hinted at, but not confirmed, when she suggestively offers Mecha Maid a massage. She also seems a little too eager to Skinship Grope Minerva, who not too long ago was accusing her of trying to steal London away.
  • Cat Girl: Has pointed ears, fangs, claws, and nine prehensile tails.
  • Every Thing Sounds Sexier In French: The team's resident francophone. Since almost everything in Canada has to be written in both English and French, she sometimes repeats what Gables says in French.
  • Hartman Hips: Katt is only slightly above Mecha Maid on the official bust size chart, but her hips make up for it.
  • Just Friends: With London, according to Minerva, although she is a little too quick to deny having romantic feelings towards him.
  • Kimono Fanservice: She puts on a kimono to do massages.
  • Male Gaze: Just like Spinnerette, she gets a few flattering shots that show off her butt. Which is one of the only parts of her that distinguishes her from a male.
  • Mundane Utility: Uses her prehensile tails for massages and lifting heavy objects.
  • Precision F-Strike: Coupled with Bilingual Bonus, since when annoyed she tends to respond with rather vulgar Quebecois profanity.
  • Prehensile Tail: She has nine of them, and they're very strong.
  • Stripperiffic: In contrast to her fairly conservative civilian clothes and military-style uniform, her choice of swimsuit appears to be a strapless bikini and a G-string.

Captain Alberta

A former member of the Legion of Canadian Superheroes who was sent to a three-month sensitivity training camp. He returned prematurely to find Minerva had taken his spot on the team and immediately swore revenge.

    Major/Recurring Villains 

Alexis Woodrow a.k.a. "Evil Spinnerette"

A young girl who claimed to take up the spider motif before Spinnerette. Used magic and instructions gathered from Dungeons & Dragons books to turn herself into an avatar of the spider queen Lolth. Defeated by Spinnerette, but got off with a relatively light sentence as she was legally considered a minor in the eyes of the US justice system.

  • Alpha Bitch: Complete with two underlings, Dakota and Julian the latter of whom she transforms into a spiderwoman because if he'd remained male, he would have been a lot smaller and a tasty snack.
  • Arachnid Appearance and Attire: Has a spider for the lower half of her body and wears a costume with a webbing motif.
  • The Atoner: In Issue 7, she voiced regret for turning herself into a Drider, and voiced interest in somehow reversing the transformation. Ultimately averted, it was all an act.
  • Dangerously Genre Savvy: She knows a baited trap when she sees one. She's also perceptive enough to not just identify but successfully search for superheroes in their civilian disguises, and can catch on to Les Yay undertones, and construct a ruse based off the plot devices her opponent is most likely to fall for given a list of the comic books she likes most.
  • Dark Action Girl: As Heather's evil counterpart.
  • Card-Carrying Villain: Embraces being the villain to the point of demanding Heather refer to her as Evil Spinnerette.
  • Evil Counterpart: To Spinnerette.
  • Evil Laugh: How she generally introduces herself.
  • Extra Eyes: Gets four smaller eyes on her forehead post-transformation.
  • Friendly Enemy: Appears to genuinely like Heather, despite their differences
  • Functional Magic: Dungeons and Dragons magic works the same in real life that it does in the game.
  • Half-Human Hybrid: Turned herself into a drider: human torso, the lower body of a spider.
  • Hellish Pupils: After her transformation she is frequently drawn with slitted pupils.
  • I Am A Humanitarian: Strongly implied by this guest art.
  • It's All About Me: Is very arrogant, and the reason she transformed herself in the first place was to rebel against her controlling parents.
  • Karma Houdini: Because of her status as a minor (and her rich family), she couldn't be tried in a court of law, despite numerous instances of breaking-and-entering, theft, illegal use of magic, and assault, and more or less got off with a light sentence. In Chapter 7, she creates two more Drider minions and soundly beats Heather in one-on-one combat, and leaves the city, facing no repercussions.
  • Lonely Rich Kid: Alexis' upbringing appears to have been both wealthy and painfully stultifying, with implications of endless and unnecessary (to Alexis) sessions with psychiatrists, doctors, and clergy after her transformation. (Played with a bit though; Dakota and Julian are definitely friends, even though Alexis threatens to kill them both if Heather won't fight her.)
  • Manipulative Bitch: Tricks Heather by faking repentance.
  • Meaningful Name: Arguably her last name Woodrow.
  • Most Common Super Power: Lampshaded by Tiger and Mecha Maid.
  • Of Corsets Sexy: Her costume is a webbing-themed corset.
  • Spider People: She's a drider. And she's now got two drider minions at her command.
  • Teens Are Monsters: She's only 16, and unlike Dr. Universe and Greta Gravity, has no sympathetic backstory to explain her Start of Darkness. She became a villain For the Evulz and mutated herself just to rebel against her controlling parents.
  • Walk the Earth: The true motivation of Alexis' confrontation with Spinnerette: to get the hell out of Columbus.
  • Worthy Opponent: Refers to Heather as such before leaving.
  • Younger Than They Look: She's only 16!

Dr. Universe

An Objectivist Evil Genius who is working with Dr. Lambha on an unspecified project. Dr. Universe was once a respected scientist researching the "Cherenkov-Kirby Reaction" but reportedly turned evil after he read an Ayn Rand novel. The Government tried to shut down his free energy research, based on the suspicion that he was a Communist sympathizer, and abducted him and his research assistant (Greta). He read the novel while in capitivity.

  • Anti-Villain: Easily the most sympathetic of the villains, as he's not truly evil.
  • Bald of Evil: Balding, as he appears to have lost most of his hair after he became a supervillain.
  • Benevolent Boss: Both before and after his Start of Darkness, he's shown to treat his assistant, Greta, well and is quite fond of her.
  • Big Bad: The most outstanding candidate thus far, for a given value of bad.
  • Blue and Orange Morality: When you get right down to it, Dr. U isn't exactly evil to begin with. It's just that his principles are way out of step with society.
  • Card-Carrying Villain: A complex case. On one hand, he won't dispute anyone calling him a villain but he considers himself a scientist first and foremost, and berates Greta for "playing the villain". On the other hand, he claims that society at large considers scientists in general to be villains and pop-starts to be heroes.
  • Cut Lex Luthor a Check: Averted in his backstory. He and Greta were working on free, limitless energy but since they planned to give it to China, who funded their research and had the greatest projected need of it, they were shut down and imprisoned by the government.
  • Even Evil Has Standards: Works for Nazis only because he knows their plan will fail, and visibly enjoys it when it finally does. It doesn't hurt that they are paying him a lot of money, and he considers draining racists of their money as a service to the community.
  • For Science!: His primary motivation is the progression of science, but he doesn't ignore potential practical applications.
  • Friendly Enemy: Towards Spinnerette, to the point that he saves her life.
  • Heroic Build: Cuts quite a massive figure for a scientist.
  • I Did What I Had to Do: When he had to cut off Spinny's extra arms to save her life. From the dialogue, he's really apologetic.
  • Kick the Son of a Bitch: Forcefully taking the Genetic Infusion Chamber from Dr. Lambha during the press conference would have been a serious theft if the latter wasn't such a Jerkass Bad Boss.
  • Mad Scientist: In Name Only; in practice he's relatively calm and pragmatic, not to mention reasonable.
  • Mundane Utility: The CK Glove isn't just for power amplification, it also makes espressos and plays flac files
  • Noble Demon: Considering he saves Spins' life twice when she has having a superpower melt down. He had ample opportunity to experiment on her at the time, but insisted on her volunteering for such treatment. He also has the courtesy to not remove Spinnerette's mask as he helps her.
    Spinnerette: Aren't you curious who I really am?
    Dr. Universe: I know exactly who you are. You're Spinnerette.
  • Omnidisciplinary Scientist: He apparently is a nuclear physicist (or whatever field would involve "Limitless Energy") who dabbles into the workings of gravity, a geneticist, and also a surgeon.
  • Only in It for the Money: Keeping up with his Objectivist philosophy, this is the reason he does anything. He doesn't believe in Nazi or Neo-Confederate ideals for a second, but he'll work for them if the money is good (and is confident their idiotic plan requiring his services would fail anyway).
  • Pragmatic Villainy: He calls off an attack on the heroes when he finds out there are other "rogue werewolves" he can take.
  • Steven Ulysses Pervillain: His real name is Ulysses N. Verde.
  • Secret Test of Character: Administers a subtle one to Spinnerette, asking her if she'd accept to selflessly donate her body for testing to give the world free energy. It all sounds like your typical Mad Scientist rhetoric, until you realize that he's an objectivist. He's by definition opposed to altruism. (Either that, or he has a conscience in spite of his beliefs or he believes being a good person when necessary is ultimately more profitable?), making this a case of Blue and Orange Morality.
  • Strawman Political: Dr. U is a better Objectivist than virtually any Rand fan you'll meet in real life, including Rand herself. This makes him a very unusual positive note  case.
  • Un Evil Laugh: A rather lackluster "Heh... haha!" that he occasionally wishes was "more maniacal".
  • Villains Out Shopping: Issue 15 has him and Greta Gravity going out for some ice cream. Super MILF takes the time to stop by and melt their ice creams for no real reason before flying off.

Greta Gravity

Dr. Universe's well-endowed assistant, she and Heather initially do not get along. Greta has the power to create her own localized gravity fields, which lets her pick up and throw objects of almost any size.

  • All Germans Are Nazis: Averted, she's visibly uncomfortable around the Nazi remnants who commission a Hitler clone from her boss. Of course she's German-Brazilian so her "fatherland" is not the same as them.
  • Anti-Villain: Like Dr. Universe she's not genuinely evil.
  • Big Beautiful Woman: She's chubby but extremely well-endowed, and her outfit reveals a lot of cleavage. If she's not providing fanservice in the main series, then it's usually in donation wallpapers. Doctor Universe made her eat enough food to gain over thirty kilograms of weight in their backstory since she would need the extra energy for their escape attempt. Much to her chagrin, since she was trying to lose weight.
  • But Not Too Foreign: She's of German ancestry, but is proudly Brazilian born and raised. note 
  • The Dragon: For Doctor Universe. She tends to do all of the fighting and heavy "lifting" for him.
  • Friendly Enemy: With Spinnerette, to the point that they're more like Vitriolic Best Buds. Despite often being on the opposite side, Greta does seem to be genuinely fond of Heather.
  • Gag Boobs: Her enormous bust prevents her from seeing what's directly below her.
  • Genki Girl: You might not want to get her started about Brazil (or, even more so, futebol). You might not be able to handle the gushing.
  • Gravity Master: Her power is control over gravity within a limited radius.
  • Hot Scientist: Her former job was as Dr. Universe's lab assistant. Glasses: check. Braid: check. Amply filled-out labcoat and cardigan: check.
  • I Was Just Passing Through: Claims that she saved Heather and Mecha Maid from burning to death out of "[her] own rational self-interest."
  • Meganekko: Before she became a villain, anyway.
  • Most Common Superpower: Quite literally. Her size is a side effect of her power - and her power is to defy gravity.
  • Nice Hat: A felt hat that she's quite defensive about.
  • Noble Demon: Like her boss, she's not truly evil, but has embraced being a villain.
  • Oktoberfest: Her costume, given to her by some racist guards.
  • Pet the Dog: Her reaction to Heather's despair at losing her extra arms was nothing short of heartwarming.
  • Vain Sorceress: Heather deduces that she's using her gravity powers to as a makeshift corset and push-up bra. Hence, why she has still an hourglass figure and shapely breasts despite being chubby. While Greta is quick to drop the conversation, she's doesn't deny it either.
  • Villains Out Shopping: Issue 15 has her and Dr. Universe going out for some ice cream. Super MILF takes the time to stop by and melt their ice creams for no real reason before flying off.

Colonel Glass

A member of the Korean People's Army with telekinetic control over glass, and who has a past with Mecha Maid and her family.

  • Absurdly Sharp Blade: He can manipulate glass on an apparently molecular level, enabling him to create blades sharp enough to cleanly slice through metal.
  • Arch-Enemy: Strongly implied to have been one to White Heron.
  • Ax-Crazy: Look at his expression on the cover of Issue 18!
  • Bandaged Face: Is swathed in bandages.
  • Berserk Button: He's from Best Korea, so he doesn't take kindly to insult to Father Kim Il Sung.
  • Boxing Lessons for Superman: He's able to identify different types of glass on sight.
  • Colonel Kilgore: Is a(n allegedly former) colonel in the North Korean People's Army.
  • Commissar Cap: Wears one as part of his military uniform.
  • Crazy-Prepared: Deliberately rigged the hostage exchange to provoke a fight with White Heron and filled a nearby river with glass shards to use as ammo.
  • Dangerously Genre Savvy: He reads TVTropes, and even cites one of the pages to a General he's about to kill (Faceless Goons to be precise)
  • Deader Than Dead:
    • Had his head blasted into a gory mess by Buzz and then had his corpse cremated. No way in hell he survived.
    • Marilyn confirms in the next chapter that he's not coming back.
  • Deadpan Snarker: Colonel Glass is fond of sarcastic humour and making cutting remarks while he shreds his opponents with glass shards.
  • Death by Irony/Hoist by His Own Petard: After being led into a greenhouse by Spinny, he is caught in the spray of glass shrapnel caused by the explosion of the bomb set off by her. Overwhelmed by the dozens of pieces of glass flung down upon him, he is unable to control them all and gets shredded by the stragglers. It doesn't kill him, but it incapacitates him long enough for Spinny and Buzz to finish him off.
  • The Dreaded: Everyone that has heard of him fears him, and his appearance in Columbus is enough to get the city sealed off. Even in a different hemisphere, his name scares people.
  • Even Evil Has Standards: Glass may be a bloodthirsty psychopath, but when he learns that Mecha Maid is dying of ALS as a result of North Korea's superpower-breeding camps, he calls off their fight, apologizes, and tells her to spend her remaining time with her loved ones before leaving.
  • Faux Affably Evil: He can be relatively polite when he wants to be, and may invoke Villainous Valor on occasion. Though he's quick to ditch it when the opportunity arises, and there's still the little matter of him being a Grade-A psycho.
  • Flechette Storm/Storm of Blades: How he uses glass offensively.
  • Godzilla Threshold: Prompts this in Marilyn, who loads up on several highly lethal and incendiary implements in her suit, overriding her AI helper Vesper's safety protocol warnings each step of the way. Including a thermite self-destruct charge.
  • Hair-Trigger Temper: A guy honking his car horn at him sets him off. And by "sets him off" we mean "imagines liquefying everyone in the car and dismembering random passersby." He's able to resist the temptation of doing it for real, but a cat in a nearby alley isn't so lucky.
  • Healing Factor: His secondary power gives him "Level 4" regenerative abilities. In one instance he regrows part of his arm moments after it was severed in an attack. He is even able to recover from white phosphorus. So Buzz blows his head away and than has Heather cremate him before he can try it again.
  • Hero Killer: Is considered a Class Triple-A supervillain and, in a more literal sense, killed the legendary White Heron in the 1980s.
  • In the Hood: Sports a black hoodie while "incognito" in the US, and somehow fits his military uniform underneath it and some jeans.
  • It's Personal: Fought and killed Marilyn's adoptive mother, the South Korean superheroine White Heron, in 1985.
  • Katanas Are Just Better: Forms a katana out of glass to slice apart Mecha Maid's rockets.
  • Kill It with Fire: Since he can block, deflect, or destroy most attacks using glass, and his Healing Factor allows him to recover from any injury quickly, the only way to really defeat Col. Glass is to burn him to death. Which Spinnerette finally does at the end of Glass' arc, using thermite after white phosphorus proved ineffective.
  • Killed Off for Real: By Buzz and Spinny's hands, no less. They cremate him to make sure he doesn't come back. He's the first of the comic's main fatalities outside of a flashback.
  • Knight of Cerebus: Stated as such in the comments. He also appears to be the first truly psychotic villain (Alexis wanted to rebel against her stiflingly proper parents, and Dr. Universe is an Anti-Villain with a case of Blue and Orange Morality. Col. Glass here revels in ripping people to bloody shreds with his glass shards, the first on-panel killing in the comic.)
  • Luke, I Am Your Father: Marilyn believes that Glass might be her biological father.
  • Meaningful Name: He's a colonel with control over glass. 'Nuff said.
  • Mind over Matter: Has psychokinetic control over glass. Any form of glass.
  • Not Quite Dead: This guy just won't go down. Not even when Mecha Maid uses white phosphorous on him. It took a volley of gunshots to the head and being set on fire to finally off him.
  • Older Than They Look: Is at least in his 40's, but looks the same as he did in 1985.
  • People's Republic of Tyranny: Is in the employ of the Democratic People's Republic of Korea, aka North Korea.
  • Pet the Dog: When he finds out that Mecha Maid is dying as a result of the breeding camps and experiments, he apologizes and leaves her alive, telling her to spend the rest of her allotted time with her loved ones.
  • Rasputinian Death: Of the "nothing less would have taken him down" variety. To wit, he has his arm torn off in a building collapse, then Marilyn lights him on fire with white phosphorus, then Heather tricks him into shredding himself with a rain of glass, and then Buzz blows his head off before he and Heather finally cremate him with a thermite charge.
  • Scary Teeth: His teeth are shark-like.
  • Slasher Smile: Sports one on the cover of Issue 16, and throughout the issue as well.
  • The Sociopath: Used glass shards to peel a cat like an orange For the Evulz, and rigged a hostage exchange by bringing one extra prisoner - baby Marilyn - and a truck with glass headlights, and then trying to turn the extra prisoner into a Human Sacrifice for Kim Il-sung as a ploy to get White Heron to drop her guard.
  • Worthy Opponent: Acknowledges Mecha Maid as one after she tries to activate her self-destruct to kill him. When it fails due to her suit malfunctioning, he gives her a chance to stand up so she can die on her feet.
  • Would Hurt a Child: Brings baby Marilyn as an extra prisoner and tries to kill her in order to provoke a fight with White Heron. Especially awful since she could very well be his own biological daughter.



Heather's well-endowed roommate and confidante at school. Sews outfits for Heather and generally puts up with her antics while she stumbles around trying to get the hang of her powers. Also leans on the fourth wall on occasion by pointing out how impossible some of the spider powers are. Of Indian descent (she wears a bindi on her forehead).

Dr. Lambha

Working with Dr. Universe on the construction of the Genetic Infusion Chamber. The main researcher at the lab where Heather works.

  • Bad Boss: Often leaves Heather to work alone in the lab, insisting that she stay up all night if she has to.
  • Dirty Coward: When his life is threatened by Colonel Glass, his first and only concern is himself. To the point that he delivers what is basically a superweapon to Glass on a silver platter. Mecha Maid, Spinnerette, and Buzz all call him out on this in rapid succession.
  • Jerkass: Blames Heather for anything that goes wrong in the lab.
  • Jerk with a Heart of Gold: POSSIBLY. If he was telling the truth, he really DOES want to use the Genetic Infusor for good purposes, and wasn't even trying to make a profit.
  • Jerk with a Heart of Jerk: Glass threatening his life reveals him to be a selfish coward at heart.
  • Hair-Trigger Temper: Is very temperamental.
  • Hollywood Science: He angrily lampshades how Patti, and the media in general, understand nothing about genetics when she makes a remark about how his research into spider mutations could help find a cure for fatness.
  • Irony: Despite being a student of Doctor Universe, his Jerk with a Heart of Gold entry would make him an Altruist.
  • Never My Fault: When Spinnerette and Buzz chew him out for hiding another Cherenkov reactor in the campus, making it a target for Glass thus endangering everyone, he claims he had no choice since Doctor Universe made him do it. Buzz points out that he could have at least told the authorities.
  • Tempting Fate: He doesn't even get to finish saying "At least things can't get any worse." before Colonel Glass shows up.

Buzz Rickards

A security guard at the university. Currently dating Sahira.

  • Anti-Hero: Of the Pragmatic Hero variety. He's a nice man and all, but between being willing to leave Lambha to be tortured to death by Glass and later blowing the latter's face apart halfway through his Famous Last Words, he's not exactly a straightforward hero.
  • Awesome McCoolname: Quoth Sahira: "That doesn't sound like the name of a guy who plays by the rules!"
  • Badass Normal: As attested, with these words no less, by Heather herself.
  • The Cape: He wants to be a cop, not because of better pay or anything like that, but because he wants to do more to "protect what we have" than round up drunken college students.
  • Dark-Skinned Blond: He got blonde hair and is Ambiguously Brown.
  • Fair Cop: Technically he's only a security guard, but that's just because Columbus' Finest aren't hiring at the moment.
  • Genre Savvy: He knows when a girl is just trying to seduce him to break into the security system. He also knows to make absolutely sure a psychopath with vitrokinetic powers and off-the-charge regenerative capacity is absolutely dead by ordering an immediate cremation, despite him unloading his shotty into the madman's head just moments earlier.
  • Multicolored Hair: Light in the front, dark in the back.
  • Off Model: Buzz's second appearance has his skin and hair colors swapped.
  • Reasonable Authority Figure: Despite seeing through Sahira's ploy, he deletes the security footage of Heather using her spider powers and eventually starts dating Sahira.
  • Understanding Boyfriend: It's very heavily implied that he knows Sahira's secret and is willing to just stay outside and simply listen to what she has to say about Fireblade's attack.


The cute guy next door. Both he and Heather have a mutual interest in each other... but things just keep getting in the way. She dates him once, but then ditches him for Marilyn.

  • Dogged Nice Guy: He seems genuinely interested in Heather, but can't ever score a date with her thanks to her superhero career. When he finally does, she leaves early to sort out her feelings with Marylin once and for all.
  • Long-Haired Pretty Boy: He has fairly long hair and is rather handsome.
  • Love Interest: Heather would like to think that he is, anyway. She even states that he's the Mary-Jane Watson to her Peter Parker. It's ultimately averted when she dumps him for Marilyn.

Patti Winters

A local reporter for Channel 4 who seems to focus on following superhero related stories. Also the host of her own morning talk show.

  • Chekhov's News: When interviewing Dr. Lambha she notes that the pool for the Genetic Infusion Chamber is large enough for a person and asks if it could be used to give a person super powers. No guesses for where Heather gets her powers.
  • Coincidental Broadcast: While Sahira is flipping through channels, and arguing with Heather, she comes across a perfectly timed report from Patti.
    "..Dr. Universe and Greta Gravity have returned to the Ohio Research University campus, demanding to speak with Spinnerette."
  • Going for the Big Scoop: She tends to show up where super villains do, sometimes before them, sometimes after to either interview them directly or report from a distance.
  • Hot Scoop: Always seems to be on-scene whenever something big goes down.
  • Intrepid Reporter: She has quite the habit of getting involved with Dr. Universe and Greta Gravity. Of course, she was there for their Start of Darkness so it's likely that helps to keep her safe.
  • Nonindicative Name: Patti Winters in a superhero comic? Clearly she's going to have ice powers? Nope, just a normal reporter.
  • Shout-Out: Both her name and the fact that she runs a talk-show, to "The Patty Winters Show" from American Psycho.
  • Talk Show: In addition to being a reporter, she also hosts "Wakeup! with Patti Winters".

Park Seong

Marilyn's adopted father, who works for DARPA.
  • Dad the Veteran: Worked for the South Korean military.
  • Gadgeteer Genius: Helped create the Powered Armor, missiles, and jetpack Marilyn uses, and works for DARPA developing powered armor and weapons.
  • Open-Minded Parent: Is aware that his daughter is a super-heroine and in a romantic relationship with another woman, and is perfectly OK with it.
  • Secret Secret Keeper: Marilyn's told him Spinnerettte's civilian ID, but Heather doesn't know he knows.
  • The Short Guy with Glasses: Is relatively short, wears glasses, and is incredibly intelligent.
  • Perma Stubble: Has five o'clock shadow in his concept art and his first appearance. He even had it in 1985.
  • Tiny Guy, Huge Girl: The Tiny Guy to White Heron's Huge Girl.

Park the Butler

Mecha Maid's faithful butler. The Alfred to her Batman.

  • Bad Ass: He attacks Colonel Glass despite knowing for a fact that he's severely outclassed, without hesitation, with nothing more than a pair of tonfa.
  • Battle Butler: Used to work under White Heron in the South Korean military, and currently helps look after Marilyn.
  • Eyepatch of Power: Wears one after getting one of his eyes destroyed by Col. Glass.
  • Impaled with Extreme Prejudice: Glass stabs Park when he makes the mistake of taking his attention off him.
  • Secret Secret Keeper: Marilyn's told him Spinnerettte's civilian ID, but Heather doesn't know he knows.


A Class V demon working as a secretary at the Underworld Department of Labor.


Case's old roommate, now employed as a blacksmith in Hell.

  • Berserk Button: Don't criticize his smithing skills.
  • The Blacksmith: Is shown forging a BFS for Minerva to wield.
  • Canon Welding: Like Guinness, he's from Krow's earlier webcomic Krakow.
  • Older Than They Look: While Guinness has aged up from a young teen to an adult, Tom looks more or less the same as he did when he left the world of the living. Possibly justified due to the passage of time in the underworld being extremely convoluted.

    Other Supers 


Cerberus and guardian of Hell whose job is to capture wayward evil spirits and bring them back. She was eventually fired from her job and joined the Legion of Canadian Superheroes.

Mr. Canus

Minerva's father.

  • Freudian Trio: Within one body. His right head is stern, his middle head is calm, and his left head is cheerful.
  • Hell Hound: Is a Cerberus from Hell.
  • Huge Guy, Tiny Girl: He towered over Teen Minerva.
  • Multiple Head Case: Has three heads, and his personalities are even divided the same as Minerva's.
  • Petting Zoo People: He's an antromorphic Cerberus.
  • Secret Test of Character: Minerva's "one final monster to defeat" was her own aggressiveness... but she happened to catch sight of Guinness' reflection in the strategically placed mirror and assumed it was her.

Super MILF/Dr. Laura MacKenzie

A scientist whose body was infused by an alien artefact retrieved from Venus, causing her breasts to grow to a ridiculous size and produce intense heat. She took up the alias Ms. Venus but got shut down by DC's lawyers due to her costume looking too much like Power Girl. She had several children and came back Hotter and Sexier as Super MILF.

Benjamin Franklin

One of the founding fathers, lost in time. After an incident where he saved Hitler's life, a convenient time traveler dropped him off in 2002 to prevent the Subprime Mortgage Crisis. He failed, but makes up for it via superheroics in other areas.

  • Bad Ass: He invented time travel from a musical instrument, then he beat up eveyone in a Bad-Guy Bar while naked.
  • Big Good: He is The Leader of the American Superheroes Association which acts as an umbrella of sorts for all the superhero teams in America.
  • Compound Interest Time Travel Gambit: How he initially funded the ASA, though now they get most of their cash from merchandizing.
    • Truth in Television, minus the time travel and the ASA. He bequeathed £1,000 each to the two most important cities in his life (Boston, where was born and raised, and Philadelphia, the adopted hometown where he made his name), each fund to be partially opened in 100 years and completely opened in 200; the Boston fund, when opened was enough to establish a large trade school after the first 100 years; the Philadelphia fund was used to fund scholarships to local high school students at maturity in the 1990s.
  • Cool Old Guy: It's Benjamin Franklin, the lady's man, famous inventor, and witty humorist. In this verse, he's also a superhero!
  • Dirty Old Man: Of course. He was leering down a woman's cleavage when he was sent through time.
  • Full-Frontal Assault: A little nudity didn't stop him from engaging in Good Old Fisticuffs when he first became time-displaced.
  • Historical-Domain Character: America's Founding Father is now in Columbus, Ohio in the 21st century
  • Language Barrier: When he time traveled to Germany, he couldn't understand what Hitler was saying. Oddly enough, the real Benjamin Franklin did speak German.
  • Merchandise-Driven: invoked He traveled to Columbus Ohio to ask Spinnerette to join the ASA so he could sell Spinnerette themed merchandise. Mecha Maid asked to keep the action figure he brought along.
  • Super Luck: As long as the timeline he's in depends on him surviving to invent time travel, anything in that timeline that tries to hurt him will luckily miss, and any attack of his will be a lucky perfect shot.

White Heron

A Korean superheroine who fought Colonel Glass in 1985.

Silver Age Spinnerette

An alternate universe version of our Spinnerette.

  • Acceptable Targets: The only thing worse than communists and supervillains in her mind is... hippies.
  • Alternate Self: Unlike Schoolgirl Spinnerette, this one is actually a Spinnerette from another universe.
  • Big Beautiful Woman: While she was nowhere near the level of Greta Gravity, she was still well over the minimum weight requirement for joining the army despite being too short. When told this, she angrily snapped "It's called an ass! You should look it up sometime!"
  • Cloudcuckoolander: She wanted to play softball, so she tried to join the army during the Vietnam War. She was too short to join the army, so stormed out of the nurse's office with her shirt undone and immediately signed up to become a super-soldier.
  • Luke, I Am Your Father: Not really, but she wrongly concludes that Spinnerette must be her future daughter once she realizes she's in The New Tens.
  • Medium Awareness: Upon seeing Mainstream Spinnerette, Silver Age Spinny complains that she already had to fight dopplegangers from Pluto three issues ago.
  • Patriotic Fervor: She was extremely enthusiastic about joining the US Army (to play softball) and derides Sahira as a hippie for thinking it's a bad idea.
  • Pint-Sized Powerhouse: She's 4'11", half a head shorter than Heather, who is only 5'1" herself.
  • Purple Is The New Black: Her costume is dark blue rather than black.
  • Super Soldier: She got her powers from a super-solder serum developed by Dr. Universe.

    Minor Villains 


An elderly Nazi plotting to resurrect Adolf Hitler by infusing a clone with his soul.

  • Apocalypse Hitler: His Evil Plan was to resurrect Hitler by cloning him and then summoning the original's soul to possess the clone.
  • Badass Grandpa/Evil Old Folks: He looks like he's over 100, but he can still put up a fight.
  • Badass Mustache: Exactly like Hitler's.
  • Bad Boss: Didn't show any compunctions to burning his henchman, Maus, to death along with his enemies.
  • Berserk Button: Anything having to do with Jewish people.
  • Ghostapo: The "last of the Third Reich's Sorcery Batallion" and a practitioner of "Germanic wizardry".
  • Mad Scientist: Has enough knowledge of cloning to know that simply creating a genetic duplicate of a person doesn't mean creating a copy of them.
  • Meaningful Name:
    • His name means "Ball Lightning" in German, and in astrophysics refers to a black hole formed of energy rather than mass.
    • The Flakpanzer IV Kugelblitz was an experimental self-propelled anti-aircraft gun (essentially a tank) that utilized a twin-mounted version of the MK 103 cannon - but of the five made only one was used.
  • Politically Incorrect Villain: He's a Nazi and thus hates Jewish people.
  • Shock and Awe: As per his name, he uses lightning magic.
  • Those Wacky Nazis: Is a survivor of the Third Reich, but a relatively minor villain.


A tall and heavily muscled Nazi Super Soldier who acts as Kugelblitz's dragon.

Roberta Lee

The great-great-great-great-granddaughter of Robert E. Lee. She plans to clone him and raise the clone to lead the Confederates anew.


An aspiring supervillain that attacks a bus full of kids.

Delta Wave/Justin

A young man with dream altering powers.

  • Battle Harem: Once Spinny realizes they're in a dream Delta has Evil Spinnerette, Kat and the rest attack Spinny.
  • Bitch in Sheep's Clothing: Downplayed. While the overly polite, shy Nice Guy behavior he exudes is just a front, he's not particularly evil, he just got carried away.
  • Black and Nerdy: Has a Geek Physique, Nerd Glasses, and an unhealthy obsession with anime and superhero girls. Though it's been pointed out in-universe that he doesn't seem particularly smart.
  • Compelling Voice: Uses this to control weaker minds trapped by his dream powers.
  • Dream Weaver: His superpower is to control dreams. With it, he traps and brainwashes the cast into believing they're characters in a cliche-riddled harem anime world. When they realize what's really going on, he drops the whole act and starts showing his full mastery over the dream reality.
  • Easily Forgiven: Downplayed - although Spinnerette does let him off with nothing but a couple of slaps to the face and an order to get a girlfriend, he did technically save her life and didn't cause her any lasting harm with his dream shenanigans.
  • New Transfer Student: He's introduced playing this role.
  • Not Evil, Just Misunderstood: He invokes this when Spinnerette calls him a super villain and starts pummelling him.
  • Obliviously Evil: He's not intentionally malicious, but he really doesn't seem to be aware that there's something very disturbing about taking an unconscious girl home instead of to the hospital and using her to live out his sexual fantasies via her dreams.
    "I'm not a supervillain, I'm just misguided."
  • Occidental Otaku: He's apparently a huge fan of harem anime cliches.
  • Scary Black Man: Played with. He poses as a fairly wimpy kid in dreams, but can come across as menacing once he breaks out the Compelling Voice. But in the real world, he really is a completely powerless wimp.
  • Trope Overdosed: Delta seems to have been aiming to experience every harem anime cliche in existence, and then some.
  • You Need to Get Laid: Spinnerette tells him this after she escapes from the dream world.
  • Yuri Fan: Deconstructed, as Spinnerette, an actual lesbian/bisexual, is clearly not amused that he would consider her sexual preferences to be entertainment.

Silver Age Evil Spinnerette

An alternate universe version of Evil Spinnerette. She wears gold-lamé.

  • Alternate Self: She's the Silver Age counterpart of Alexis Woodrow, but has a purple-and-green abdomen and wears a gold lamé costume.
  • Psycho for Hire: She's an assassin, and was hired to kill Spinnerette's loved ones.