Robin of Loxley (Robin Hood)
Played by: Cary ElwesOur protagonist, a crusader fighting in the Holy Land who comes home to England only to find his family is dead and his house and land have been taken away. He turns outlaw against the usurper Prince John and the corrupt Sheriff of Rottingham to reclaim his stolen property.
- Deadpan Snarker: Robin rarely misses a chance to make a dry quip at the idiocy unfolding around him.
- Handsome Lech: He flirts with Maid Marian the first chance he gets.
- The Hero: The crusader of Sherwood fighting to free the people from the tyranny of Prince John.
- Honor Before Reason: Particularly in the fight against Little John, when Ahchoo makes the logical point that the "river" John is guarding the bridge over is a little stream he can easily step over. Hits him again in the climax. Despite being warned of Prince John's trap by Marian, he still goes to the archery tournament to prove his skills before the kingdom.
- Improbable Aiming Skills: Robin manages to pin a soldier to a tree with six perfectly placed arrows that he fired in a row down his bow all at once. Of course, the film being an Affectionate Parody of Robin Hood legends, this is Played for Laughs.
- Rousing Speech: He constantly attempts these, only to get interrupted or find out that nobody is listening.
- The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything: We never actually see Robin doing the "steal from the rich and give it to the poor" that made Robin Hood famous in the first place.
Played by: Richard LewisKing Richard's brother, who took the opportunity to usurp the throne while the king was away fighting in the Crusades.
- Bad News in a Good Way: Trope Namer. He hates getting bad news, so he orders the Sheriff to give it to him "in a good way." The Sheriff's subsequent to tell him about Robin's rebellion while laughing just makes John even angrier.
- Beauty Mark: A massive mole that keeps inexplicably moving around on his face inbetween scenes. He didn't even realize he had one, let alone that it moves.The Sheriff: Stop me if I'm wrong about this but... wasn't your mole... on the other side?Prince John: I have a mole?
- Big Bad: He's the primary antagonist of the movie.
- Dirty Coward: He's a whiny spoiled brat who's afraid of combat.
- Non-Action Big Bad: He relies heavily on the sheriff on Rottingham and the guards to protect him. At the end of the film when those are taken care of, he's subdued without a fight.
The Sheriff of Rottingham
Played by: Roger ReesThe sheriff of Rottingham who acts as Prince John's right hand man.
- Angrish: Very prone to this.
- The Dragon: To Prince John as his right-hand enforcer.
- Embarrassing First Name: Mervyn.
- Everyone Calls Him "Barkeep": He's just "the Sheriff" for most of the film. Justified due to his Embarrassing First Name that he clearly hates.
- Fate Worse Than Death: He's forced to agree to be with Latrine for the rest of his life in order to be saved from his injury. He quickly changes his mind once he has a moment to think it over without the pain of his injury.
- Just You and Me and My GUARDS!: Trope Namer when Robin challenges him at the banquet and he summons the guards and runs away.
- Impaled with Extreme Prejudice: He gets mortally injured when Robin accidentally stabs him through the stomach. He gets saved by Latrine, but only because he (begrudgingly) agreed to be hers for the rest of his life.
- Laser-Guided Karma: He's the Abhorrent Admirer of Maid Marian and threatens Robin in order to force her into marrying him. Later, after being struck a mortal blow, he agrees to his own Abhorrent Admirer Latrine's ultimatum of marriage in return for saving his life.
- Malaproper: Has a problem saying his words properly when upset."Sir! Struckey has loxed again!"
- Smug Snake: He remains eternally confident that Robin and his men will die at his hands.
- Trilling Rs: Occasionally.
Played by: Amy YasbeckRobin Hood's love interest.
- Godiva Hair: When she gets out of the bathtub in her first scene, her hair covers her cleavage.
- Neutral Female: To an almost painful degree during the film's climax.
- Smarter Than You Look: Smart enough to sneak out the back and warn Robin of danger. Not that he actually took her advice.
- Virgin Tension: Downplayed if not outright subverted by her chastity belt. She's just as annoyed by it as everyone else.
Played by: Dave ChappelleAn exchange student to England from the Holy Land. He became fast friends with Robin.
- Anachronism Stew: He wears pump-up sneakers.
- Black Best Friend: To Robin.
- Deadpan Snarker: Robin's accomplice in pointing out the stupidity of everyone else.
- The Lancer: Robin's right-hand aid and first ally in his war against Prince John.
- Malcolm Xerox: In his speech, complete with Malcolm's iconic glasses.
- Meta Guy: He made many wisecracking comments along the story which lampshaded many tropes being played in the movie.
- Only Sane Man: Comes across as this, especially when trying to persuade Robin to avoid fighting Little John and hop across the truly pathetic stream.
- Punny Name: Given his father is "Asneeze" (Azeem in Prince of Thieves), that's where Ahchoo gets his name.
- Token Black: One of only two black characters in the film.
- Uncle Tomfoolery: Parodied.
- Unfortunate Name: Whenever his name is mentioned, someone will inevitably respond with "bless you."
Played by: Mark BlankfieldRobin's blind manservant.
- Blind Mistake: Arguably the entire point of his character is to make these.
- Disability Superpower: He's able to catch the arrow fired at Robin, claiming he could hear it coming a mile away.
- Handicapped Badass: He's a ridiculous fast and persistent swordsman, is rather durable as well, and seems to have Disability Superpowers. If he could actually see, Blinkin would likely have liberated England by himself.
- Punny Name: From "Duncan" in Prince of Thieves, made into an eyesight pun.
Played by: Eric Allan KramerA big guy who joined Robin in his quest after he was defeated by him.
- The Big Guy: His main trait is how huge and strong he is.
- Captain Obvious: "Don't let my name fool you. In real life, I'm very big."
- Defeat Means Friendship: He joins Robin's group after being defeated and saved by Robin.
- Gentle Giant: Despite his size, he's a pretty nice guy.
- Hooked Up Afterwards: Implied with Broomhilde.
- Super Drowning Skills: Parodied - he flies into a panic after landing in three-inch-deep water, and never catches on that he's not in any real danger.
Will Scarlet O'Hara
Played by: Matthew PorrettaLittle John's friend who also joined Robin along with him.
- Gender-Blender Name: His middle name.
- Knife Nut: He can even use his knives to cut down an arrow fired straight at his heart. He still can't sheathe them without accidentally cutting his pants down, though.
Played by: Mel BrooksA travelling rabbi. He meets Robin during a robbery and offers the Merry Men some of his wine.
- Creator Cameo: Played by Mel Brooks.
- Good Shepherd: He shares wine and counsel and blessing; the blessings are mostly an excuse for the wine.
- Nice Guy: "Married in a hurry? Wonderful! Invite me to the bris!"
- Shout-Out: "It's good to be the king."
Played by: Tracey UllmanAn old witch who lives in a tower in the castle. She serves as a counsel to Prince John, by way of telling his fortune. She also has the hots for the sheriff of Rottingham.
- Abhorrent Admirer: To the sheriff. She keeps a cardboard cutout of him in her boudoir and likes to cuddle up to it. The Sheriff on his end is disgusted by her, and so is the cardboard cutout!
- Cordon Bleugh Chef: She gives Prince John a dish with crocodile eyeballs and newt testicles in it and expects him to eat it. He spits out the first bite while her back is turned.
- Dirty Old Woman: The kinds of things she'd like to do to the sheriff are not exactly left to the imagination.
- Unfortunate Names: Even though "Latrine" sounds a lot better than her original name of "Shithouse", it's still essentially the same thing.
Played by: Megan CavanaghMaid Marian's lady-in-waiting.
- Big "NO!": She says this when Robin almost unlocks Marian's chastity belt. Her objection leads to Marian and Robin getting married in the next scene.
- Brawn Hilda: Invoked with her name, even. She's the massive, brawny maid of Marian.
- Hooked Up Afterwards: Implied with Little John.
- Matron Chaperone: Similar to Dot Matrix with Princess Vespa, her main shtick is keeping Marian from losing her virginity before marriage."Ah ah ah! No ding-ding without the wedding ring!"
- Team Mom: She's very protective about Maid Marian. Although it's because she wants Marian to be married before she kisses a man or has sex with him.