Fantasia 2000: The same, with battling butterflies, Mount Saint Helens, Depression-Era New York, and a flamingo with lots of yo-yos. Also, Donald Duck has trouble finding his girlfriend at the worst time possible.
Fantastic Four (2005): Slimy Corrupt Corporate Executive tries to make the moves on his geeky college rival's ex-girlfriend, but everything he does just ends up pushing her back to him. Eventually, the executive puts on a mask and tries to freeze the college rival with liquid nitrogen.
Fargo: Car salesman can't convince his employer that his paperwork is finished, also fails to up-sell a promotional extra to his customers. Grumpy Old Man shits on everyone beneath him, refuses to help his daughter in an important financial transaction. A pregnant sheriff tries to work out who the main character is in the movie.
Or: A film that shows cats having sex and brutally killing each other.
Ferris Bueller's Day Off: Kid neglects his education, shamelessly manipulates the sympathy of his parents and those around him and, for his own self-gratification, triggers a series of events that results in the destruction of his best friend's father's priceless car. Without remorse. Despite this, everyone loves him (a fact lampshaded by his sister, until she makes out with a drug dealer).
Alternatively, a depressed high schooler is taken advantage of by his best friend, who wrecks the high-schooler's father's priceless car, somehow teaching him to stand up for himself.
Fido: The heartwarming story of a young boy and his pet zombie.
Fierce Creatures: Multinational corporation acquires small English zoo and turns it into corporate nightmare.
Alternatively: John Cleese owns a zoo, shoots at a few trainers, drinks the blood of an old lady, and things happen.
Field of Dreams: Undead sportspeople make a farmer destroy his crops and kidnap a writer so he can solve his daddy issues.
The Fifth Element: The world will be saved by a hot girl with weird name. With the assistance of a cab driver and a cross-dressing radio disc jockey.
Insurance worker with multiple personality disorder takes up hypochondria and illegal bare-knuckle fighting in an attempt to cure insomnia. Unwittingly becomes founder of a nationwide anarchist paramilitary force which he subsequently defeats by blowing one side of his own face off.
Middle-aged WASP finds meaning in life through "Murder, Mayhem, and Soap". Lots of soap.
Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children: Lots of children get sick, and join a cat-eyed cult led by three brothers, whose mother is a head in a box. One brother eventually grows up to become their father, only to get beaten up in a spectacular fashion. Meanwhile, a man sees dead people, thinks about deep things, and fights lots (often doing all three at the same time). Also, much of what occurs during this movie is almost completely incomprehensible to anybody who either has not played the video game on which this movie is based or has a basic understanding of physics (particularly the effects of gravity).
Finding Nemo: A widower and a Cloudcuckoolander with blue skin go on a quest to rescue the widower's son, who has been captured in a watered crystal jail with tiki figures in it by a dentist who is several times their size.
Alternatively: A man's wife is murdered by a serial killer and his son is left physically disabled. In a twisted turn of events the son is kidnapped and the man has to chase him thousands of miles with the help of a mentally challenged woman. Intended for children.note this description of the film was the subject of several humorous text messages posted on the Internet.
Finding Dory: The Cloudcuckoolander decides to go on a quest to find her family. It all culminates in vehicle hijacking and endangerment of several wildlife specimens.
Rambo III: Man from before fights evil with rebels. Over the top gunplay ensues.
Rambo (2008): The same man comes out of retirement. Everything dies.
Alternatively, The same man shows a bunch of pacifists the goods of mass murder, and how you should never trust yellow people.
A Fish Called Wanda: Femme Fatale bank robber falls in love with stuffy barrister whilst attempting to locate stolen diamonds. Her boyfriend is a psychopathic Buddhist hit-man who torments a stuttering animal lover who keeps killing dogs.
Alternately: Two members of Monty Python pretend not to know each other. Americans act rudely, behave selfishly, speak in vulgarities, and eat fish.
Fletch: A wise-ass is hired by a wealthy businessman for assisted suicide. The wise-ass decides that the best way to react to this is to dress up in a variety of weird costumes and sleep with the businessman's wife. The wise-ass is treated as the hero and as being completely in the right.
Fletch Lives: Same wise-ass heads down south to hang out with stereotypes, sleep with a dead woman and sing Zippidy-do-da.
The Flight of Dragons: Bookstore owner gets pulled into fantasy world to Save Both Worlds from mad sorcerer; he ends up destroying said fantasy world with grade school science. And this is supposed to be a good thing.
Flightplan: A widow boards a plane with her young daughter and promptly falls asleep. (This comes from an actual newspaper listing, submitted on BBC's News Quiz)
Fritz the Cat: A talking cat has lots of sex and does a lot of drugs. And he's voiced by a children's show actor. The creator of the character hated the film so much, he killed him off.
The Nine Lives of Fritz the Cat: The talking cat, despite having an icepick put through his head a year earlier, is now married and has either hallucinations or flashbacks about being a Nazi and going into space. Satan is homosexual.
Frozen: Woman reacts coldly to her sister's new boyfriend. The ensuing argument leads her to exile herself.
Alternatively: An animated Wicked on ice, with a talking snowman and singing trolls, where gloves are Serious Business.
Alternatively: A Disney movie in which a witch-queen places a curse on a beautiful princess and her entire realm, dooming both to destruction. A courageous and handsome prince storms the witch-queen's enchanted palace, battling his way past the terrifying monster that the queen created to guard it, in order to defeat the queen and lift the curse from the realm. The prince is the villain.
Alternatively: A girl announces her engagement to her sister. The sister says no... by cursing their entire kingdom.