- A Crown Of Stars: Asuka hears from Ching that the Avalon Empire makes known where its main fleet is located, even giving out coordinates and portal generator plans. Why? Because whoever wants to pick a fight with them -and is stupid enough to follow their directions with no question- is welcome to:
Ching:"Sure do. If someone’s mad enough to want to take a swing at us, we make it easy. You’d be surprised how few are smart enough to question their ‘good fortune’ that some third party always pops up to give them the information. Then they spend incredible amounts of resources to get here, and never have much time to wonder why we give them coordinates that walk them right into our strongest defenses and a major fleet presence. It makes our enemies waste their energy, brings them within easy reach of tons of our weapons, and gives the Imperial Navy units stationed here some nice, reliably appearing live-fire exercises to play with. The mice never question why the cheese is sitting there, do they? Snap!"
- Advice And Trust: Asuka gives one about herself and Shinji in chapter 3:
Asuka:"Don't. Being the second greatest Eva Pilot in the world isn't exactly making you one of the unwashed masses, Shinji, especially when I'm the top mark. You brought your score up six points in a week, and almost matched me. And who beat Sachiel with no training? Who beat Shamshel despite two Stooges in the Entry Plug with him weighing him down? Who was right there with me against Gaghiel and Israfel? Hm?"
Asuka:"Damn straight. So straighten up and be proud of it, Shinji. You're more than good enough to fight with me. We're elite Eva Pilots, one in a billion. Don't you ever stop chasing me, either. You and me are the most dangerous people on the planet. There's no one else I'd trust to have next to me in a fight like you."
- In the Jackie Chan Adventures and Teen Titans crossover fic A Shadow Of The Titans, Jade has one after the mess caused by the Master of Games, when she says she'll find her way home before the Queen overtakes her mind.
"It won't be easy, but I'm Jade Chan. I do the impossible and make it look easy!"
- Tiberium Wars: An eloquent summation of Tank Goodness:
"Yea verily, though I charge through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no evil, for I am driving a house-sized mass of "fuck you."
-Anonymous Mammoth Tank crewman
- Nobody Dies has put his own spin on this one.
Mana: "It's like a religious experience. Wanna know my prayer? Yea, though I walk through the Valley of the Shadow of Death, I shall fear no evil! For I am driving 35,000 tons of F_ YOU."
- From the Fallout 3 Modus Operandi fanfic:
The Lone Wanderer:"If Sarah Lyons dies, or I find Pitt raiders causing trouble in the capital wasteland again, I will come back here, and I will end you. I will kill you, your wife, and your child. I will burn your city street by street until there is nothing left. Every trace of your existence will be wiped from every file and noone will even remember that you ever tried. I took down Raven rock. I took down the Landcrawler. I took down Evergreen Mills, twice. I have traveled to point lookout and back, marched into the Supermutant's den, and nothing has stood against me. Destroying this city would be child's play. You know the legends. Ignore them at your peril."
- A smaller one:
Ashur:"What's to stop me from calling my guards?
The Lone Wanderer:"They're all dead, for one thing,"
- A short one from Thicker than Water:
Kai: Don't come closer—I'll shoot!
Ad what, exactly, do you suppose that that
- Controversial character D.J. Croft from the Mega Crossover Fan Fic Neon Exodus Evangelion by Eyrie Productions Unlimited eventually gets one of these. Based on an I Have Many Names passage from the game Marathon, it first appears in the story as a set of Arc Words and eventually evolves into a Badass Boast:
"Know you that I am he who was once Longinus, centurion of the Tenth Legion. I have been Roland, Beowulf, Achilles, Gilgamesh
. I have been called a hundred names and will be called a thousand more before the world goes dim and cold. I have been killed a thousand times and every time I return. I fight for truth. I fight for glory. I fight for love. I fight for beauty. I am Hero. I will return."
- "I have walked as a god! I have fought as a god! You will not frighten me, LITTLE MAN!" Not a bad boast, but made all the more awesome considering who's making it.
- "Alright. So. Introductions first, along with whoever's your command squad. I'm Michael, I own this house and can crush you with a tank. Repeatedly, if necessary. Or with something heavier. How about you?" From this fic called ToyHammer
- Darkly played in the Gurren Lagann/Evangelion Crossover: Neon Toppa EVA Lagann by a desperate Simon to a scared and confused Shinji (while pressing the sharp point of his drilling tool against the latter's stomach) to get information on where he can find an injured Kamina some medical attention:
"Who am I? I'll tell you who I am. I'm Simon, a member of the Gurren Brigade, but more importantly I happen to be the best driller in Jiiha Village. I hold the record for cleanest bedrock penetration (don't you dare laugh!), most feet of earth excavated in a single day, and best of all, fastest tunneling through granite and diamond. WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM?!"
- It's cool in the sense that we are made to remember that Simon is a fantastic and skilled driller, the Squick comes from being made to imagine (along with Shinji) what those drilling skills can do to soft, human flesh.
- From Wizard People, Dear Reader: "I am a beautiful animal! I am a destroyer of worlds! I am Harry fucking Potter!"
- The awesome Doctor Who fanfic The Man with No Name gives us this:
"Yes, I think war is a fool's game. Yes, I believe life — all life — is precious. But tell me something, Vharaj — did you ever listen to my enemies' tales of me? If you did, it's obvious you weren't paying attention. The Daleks do not have emotion, Vharaj. They don't know fear. But do you know what they called me? Ka Faraq Gatri. It means Destroyer of Worlds. I am the Bringer of Darkness, Vharaj. The Oncoming Storm. I've watched worlds and galaxies fall, and rise, and fall again. I fought the Vampires at the dawn of Creation, and I may yet witness the end of the Universe. I brought about the destruction of my own race, the deaths of my children, my grandchildren, my siblings, my friends, all in the name of peace, to save this Universe. So you tell me, Vharaj: what do you think I am capable of?"
- Child Of The Storm has a few of these:
"I am the God of Thunder and Lightning spoken of in ancient myth and whispered legend, Snape," he said softly. A powerful static charge began to build, until sparks danced around Thor. "I am he who battled Jormungand, the father of all great serpents, and fought the greatest Jotunheim had to offer when Merlin was but a suckling babe. I am Thor Odinson, God of the Vikings. Not a petty conjuror of cheap tricks. All the power of the storm, from all the world, flows through my veins. It can be summoned by my hammer at any time, wherever it is. Do you have any idea what that means? [Beat
] A lightning storm in Japan? Mine. A hurricane off the coast of Barbados? Mine again. A brace of tornadoes in Kansas? Mine. All that might, all that destructive force, mine to command. The moment I will it, I wield it. Channelled and guided through the mystic might of my hammer. And if you hurt my son or his friends, it will be guided right at you. Understood
- Charles Xavier and Sebastian Shaw II exchange boasts:
Shaw: You are familiar with the organisation I represent.
Xavier: More than we would like.
Shaw: Then, gentlemen, you will know that a dispute would not be wise. For you. Hellfire burns eternally, and consumes all things. Even dreams. I am a good friend to have. And a terrible enemy.
- Bruce/The Hulk when Harry is kidnapped.
Rest assured, Thor. We will find Harry. Well find the people who took him. And Hulk will smash.
- Agent Wisdom gives a lengthy one (when asked by Betsy Braddock why he isn't letting the Avengers and various Asgardians deal with the villains.
Because, Lady Elizabeth Braddock
, hundreds of good men and women, loyal servants of the crown, died horrible deaths at the hands of these bastards. I watched friends and colleagues gunned down by the Winter Soldier
, who’s now under HYDRA command. I had to identify the remains of old friends after the attack at MI6
, and that was after I spent half a night running for my life from the Soldier.
This was an attack on Britain and her people, Lady Braddock
. We are not helpless little children, running to hide behind our big, tough friends after we get hurt. Any aid we receive is welcome. But this is our country, and our problem. And I intend to solve it by hunting down every single one of the bastards responsible for this and personally escorting them to whatever hell they believe in, Avengers and Asgardians be damned.
- And from the villains:
[I am] A man of magic, Callidus Nott. And a man of magic can do anything.
[To Greyback after a Curbstomp Battle
that lasted approximately five seconds] And to answer your earlier question, zer reason ve
command you is because we are better
Death is a gift, little man. And tonight, I am feeling generous.
- And one by Harry Dresden as he unleashes his Death Curse on Gravemoss.
You like death, big guy? Here's mine. BURN!
- Lucius has a decent one in chapter 58.
- Steve (finally) gets a succinct one in chapter 59. On seeing a vast, supernaturally conjured storm consume the upper reaches of a mountain, trapping Harry and his friends on said mountain and being informed that it's been conjured by a pissed off Genius Loci powerful enough to leave Loki awestruck, he has this response.
I've fought in worse.
- Loki gives a light hearted one when Steve asks him if he can track down the HYDRA's wizard commandos.
Captain, I could do it blindfolded and drunk.
- Parodied with the Kingdom Hearts Fan Fic Those Lacking Spines.
"There are none who can avoid trembling at my power! None! No man alive! Not one! No man alive can avoid trembling at my power!" Jeffiroth cried redundantly, holding his sword straight up above him in a dramatic fashion. "I am the black wind that echoes in the—"
"There he goes again," Xaldin sighed heavily and recalled his lances.
Lexaeus groaned. "I would be much more mildly impressed with his fighting abilities if he would stop taking breaks to spew out poetry."
- The Firefly fanfic Forward has several of these, from both Jayne and Mal. At one point, when being held at gunpoint by a couple of jittery pirates....
Jayne: Look. I've gotten into fights with idiots ten times meaner than you two. I fought militia, mercenaries, and goons just like you. Hell, I've fought Alliance marines before(...)I've even tangled with Reavers.
- In an earlier arc, Mal slights Badger, who warns him to never come back to Persephone again. Mal's response....
Mal: Badger, I've got personal beef with Adelei Niska. And you know I've got all manner of trouble with the Alliance. Now, on top of all that joy, I've got a bunch of happy little low-life Browncoat terrorists who want me dead too. So, you want to join the party, feel free. Just get in line.
- In "Wrath" River delivers one while captured and being interrogated by an Academy agent. She starts laughing at him, prompting a confused demand for an explanation.
River: You have made multiple assumptions, based on fallacious reasoning, which I find hilarious. First, you think I am still an emotional wreck. You believe that I am unstable, ineffective, defeated. That is a reasonable but terribly erroneous assumption. I am functional. (...) The second fact is that you assume physically restraining me will keep you safe. You should know better by now that restraints are irrelevant. Because I can kill you with my brain.
- Sonic the Hedgehog, while in Tranquil Fury, gives out an awesome boast to this sorry bastard who hurt Tails (of another dimension... long but very well done story: He Is My Master).
: "My name is Sonic. Sonic the Hedgehog. I move at speeds faster than you can imagine...I am the protector of Mobius, a dimension you have never even heard of. I am capable of channeling the power and even the wrath of Chaos when I chose to...I have saved moons tied to planets. I have watched the world burn. I have defeated Chaos, the God of Destruction with my own bare hands
...And you...just hurt my little brother
- From Pokemon Storm Clouds, Missy sets the Scyther straight.
For all your claims to be invincible, for all your bragging and pride, I've beaten you twice. That's why you searched me out in this rain; not for revenge, but to prove to yourself that I'm not better than you. My victories over you eat you alive, and you know it. And even if you do kill me, even if I'm dead and gone, your damaged, imperfect blade will always be there: an eternal reminder of my triumph over you.
Do you remember what I once told you? ‘You cannot control a marionette with only one string’. You dared to think you controlled me?!...I’ve made you dance this way and that for years now, Giovanni. You were my plaything. Well, now you and your organization bore me. I’ll cut your strings.
- Warren Mears in the Buffy the Vampire Slayer fanfic Difficult to Fight Against Anger: "Oh, fine; this is like nickel-and-diming a cyberdemon when you're in god mode."
- Azrael in Knightfall: The Movie: "You have no idea what you're dealing with, Bane. You broke Bruce Wayne, but the Bat is something not so easy to destroy. It's bigger than him, me, all of us; and it's more powerful than all your petty ideas about vengeance and retribution. That is why Wayne spared Napier's life. He knows death and destruction are not the answer. I am not so forgiving. If I ever see you again, Bane, I promise, you will never see me."
- Hal Jordan's threat to Jerkass God Hades during the JLA Watchtower Olympics plot. He's Badass enough as is...but he proceeds to remind everyone what he was between his snit as Parallax and his return.
Hal: "ENOUGH! I have seen enough, Hades. I have seen you cheat time and again, and these heroes succeeded despite it all. You may be a god, Hades, but I was once the wrath of the God Himself. Do you dare risk that I have forgotten all your sins, which were once laid bare for me to see? You have lost. Return Troia and Nightwing to us, and call off your armies, before you face punishment that would make even the Furies cry."
- Wandering Wordsmith's Rosario + Vampire fanfiction Thawing Permafrost gives Ruby a particularly nasty Mama Bear threat:
Ruby: “I’m not telling you anything. Now get out of Yokai, and stay out if you don’t want me using these vines as creatively, and as painfully as I see fit.”
- This is countered quickly by Kaze:
“Your first mistake was thinking you could threaten me with those little cotton threads. (takes Ruby down and leaves her cold on the floor
) Your second mistake was thinking you were going to tell
me about Mizore."
- Gregg Landsman writes Eva fics, and in them he likes to have some of the Angels introduce themselves. With all of his stories together, he's almost got all of them:
- ADAM/The First: I am he who is named "I am." My feet shall walk the breadth of the Base Earth once more. My mission shall not end with death. I shall seed the ground with new truth. And that which has come before and from Me shall bow in worship. I am the Alpha. I am the original. I am the Creation of God. I am the first of the Messengers and I am coming for the one who is my Opposite. I am ADAM. I AM COMING.
- Lilith/The Second/Pending: I am she who is named "I think." My feet shall walk the width of the Blessed Earth once more. My Mission is your salvation through creation. Ascending, my children shall rally against the Enemy. They shall rise up. And the Enemy shall fall. I am opposite to he who is named "I am." I am his Equal. I am the Creator of Man. I am the True Ancestor. I am Lilith. I...RISE.
- Sachiel/The Third: I am. Through License of he who is called 'I AM' I have come. Though my feet must stomp upon the Base Earth for this blessed quest, I have come. I am the first of the many. I am the Harbringer of your destruction. I am the Covering of God. Angel of Water. I am Sachiel. I have come.
- Ramiel/The Fifth: I AM. THROUGH LICENSE OF HE WHO IS CALLED "I AM" I HAVE COME. THOUGH MY FEET SHALL NEVER TOUCH THE BASE EARTH ON THIS BLESSED QUEST, I HAVE COME. MOUNTAINS SHALL SHATTER IN MY PASSING. MY SONG IS THE CALL OF THE END OF DAYS. IN MY PASSING SHALL THE DEMON CHILDE OF LILITH BE EXCISED FROM THIS WORLD. I AM THE THUNDER OF GOD. ANGEL OF LIGHTNING. I AM RAMIEL. I HAVE COME.
- Ramiel II/Legion: I have come. And this body shall be my church! These sheep shall be my congregation! By license of he who is called ?I am? I have come. Though I have already touched the base Earth on this blessed quest, I have come. I am Legion. I am numerous. When I strike down your army, it is with SIX THOUSAND FISTS! When I stare my hatred into the depths of your soul, it is with SIX THOUSAND EYES! There has never been before one like me! There shall not be again. I am the Lightning of God! I am Ramiel. And I have returned.
- Gaghiel/The Sixth: I am. Through license of He who is called "I Am" I have come. Though my feet shall never touch the base Earth on this blessed quest, I have come. In my wake, I leave a Dead Sea. Before me, lies completion. I am the Roaring Beast of God. Angel of the Creatures of the Sea. I am Gaghiel. I have come.
- Sandalphon/The Eighth: I am. Through license of He who is called 'I am' I have come. Though I must drag my feet along the Base Earth on this most holy quest, I have come. I shall merge with the enemy of Father, becoming a being of perfection and peace. Through my Song, shall the hopes and dreams of the filthy Lilim be fulfilled in peaceful non-existence. Let My words be the seeds of your ending bliss, growing within your souls. I am the Master of the Heavenly Song of God. Angel of the Unborn. I am Sandalphon. I am here.
- Matariel/The Ninth: I am. Through license of He who is named 'I Am' I have come. Though I shall never touch the base Earth, I have come. The tears I shall shed for Father shall burn the Lilim to bones and slime. The sky itself I shall turn against them. I am the Premonition of God. Angel of Rain. I am Matariel. I have come.
- Sahaquiel/The Tenth: I AM. THROUGH LICENSE OF HE WHO IS CALLED "I AM" I HAVE COME. THOUGH I SHALL ONLY ONCE TOUCH THE BASE EARTH ON THIS BLESSED QUEST, I HAVE COME. MY FORM SHALL BE VAST AND NUMEROUS. NEW TRUTH SHALL BE FORGED WITHIN MY PASSING. AND THE NUMEROUS FORMS THROUGH WHICH I SHALL SCOUR THE LILIM OF THE EARTH SHALL BE WRIT DOWN IN THE WAY OF PRAYER AND LEGEND. I AM THE INGENUITY OF GOD. ANGEL OF THE SKIES. I AM SAHAQUIEL. I AM COMING.
- Iruel/The Eleventh: Please allow me to introduce myself. I'm an Angel of wealth and taste. Pleased to meet you! Hope you guess my name! But what's troublin' you is the nature of my game. I am. Through license of he who is called "I Am" I have come. Thought I shall never touch the base earth on my quest, I have come. I am the multitude. I am the endless expanse. I am the Many. Even standing alone, I am Legion. I am within your systems, within your story and rewriting this final act for my own ends. I am the Fear of God. Angel of Terror. I am Iruel. I am here.
- Leliel/The Twelfth: I AM. THROUGH LICENSE OF HE WHO IS CALLED 'I AM' I AM COMING. THOUGH I SHALL NEVER TOUCH THE BASE EARTH ON THIS BLESSED QUEST, I AM COMING. I AM THE DARKNESS BETWEEN STARS. I AM THE BRIDGE OF UNIVERSES. I AM THE HOLE OF THE WORM AND THE TUNNEL OF THE MOUNTAIN. LAST I AM, THOUGH NEW TRUTH SHALL BE FORGED IN MY PASSING. I AM THE JAWS OF GOD. ANGEL OF NIGHT. I AM LELIEL. I AM COMING.
- The Nobody Dies version: I AM. Through license of he who was called "I AM" I have come. Though I shall never touch my feet to the Base Earth on my most blessed mission, I have come. I am the Keeper of Father. I am separate from my Brothers, both above and below them. I am the Void. I am the bridge between the worlds and the Hole of the Worm. I am the Jaws of God. Angel of Night. I am Leliel. I have come.
- Zeruel/The Fourteenth: I AM. THROUGH LICESENSE OF HE WHO IS NAMED "I AM". I HAVE COME. THOUGH MY FEET SHALL DRAG UPON THIS BASE EARTH, I HAVE COME. I AM THE SECOND TO FATHER. INHERITOR OF HIS BOUNDLESS RAGE. YOU HAVE EXISTED SO FAR AT MY PLEASURE AND PATIENCE, AND THAT, AS SHALL YOUR WORKS OF CIVILISATION, SHALL NOW COME TO AN END. I AM THE GREATEST OF THE MESSENGERS, MOUNTAIN OF THEIR STRENGTH. CITIES SHALL FALL UPON MY PASSING. SONGS SHALL BE SUNG OF WHAT IS LEFT IN MY WAKE. I AM THE ARM OF GOD. ANGEL OF MIGHT. I AM ZERUEL. I HAVE COME.
- Arael/The Fifteenth: I AM. THROUGH LICENSE OF HE WHO IS CALLED 'I AM' I HAVE COME. THOUGH I SHALL NEVER STAND UPON THE BASE EARTH ON MY BLESSED QUEST, I HAVE COME. MY LIGHT SHALL BURN AWAY FALSEHOODS. THE TRUE AND STRONG SHALL NOT FEAR ME. I AM THE LIGHT OF GOD. ANGEL OF BIRDS. I AM ARAEL. I HAVE COME.
- Tabris/Kaworu Nagisa/The Seventeenth: I Am and I Think. By the Power of He who is called "I Am," and the Genius of of the descendants of She who is called "I Think," I was Born. Though I Walk on this Base Earth, seperate from the Lilim and my Brothers, I Am Here. Though my Father is I Am, I have another Father who was descended of I Think. Despite our Collective Goals, I will fight my Brothers to further my own Goals. I Plan, and I Live, and I Improvise. When I strike, it Will be without Warning. And when you Believe that I Am not a Threat, that is when I Am the Most Dangerous. I Am the Last, the Reborn First. I Am The Pilot of Provisional Evangelion Unit 6. I Am the Will of God. I Am the Lilim Spirit of Life. I Am the Angel of Free Will. I Am Kaworu Nagisa. I Am Tabris. I Am Here. And I Will Remain. Though Gregg has given some approval for it.
- And now in NGE: Nobody Dies, new Angels have appeared with equally boastful intros.
- Shateiel/Third Cherub: YOU ARE, ALL OF YOU, GARBAGE. Born of hate and refuse. Born of greed and fear. Your works of civilization are the mad ramblings of the already dead. You worship us and discard us. And now we have come to discard you. I am the Interrogation of God. Angel of Silence. I am Shateiel. I am here.
- Raziel/Fourth Cherub: You are, all of you, garbage. You have debased the sacred site of the Father. You have ended your world through your own curiosity. You have defiled the cosmic order through your own hunger for knowledge and power. But now you will find some answers are not worth knowing. The secrets you have judged worthy of your attention have now decided you are worth theirs. I am the Secret of God. Angel of Mysteries. I am Raziel. I am here.
- Turel/Seventh Cherub: You are garbage. Trash. Father has said above all, you must be destroyed. Humiliated. Laid low like the simpering parasite you are. I am the Spear of God. Angel of Walls. I am Turel. And you are NOTHING.
- Tamiel/Eighth Cherub: You are, all of you, Garbage. You have gathered yourselves like sheep. And like sheep, can the wolf gut you all. You are prey. I am the hunter. And I have been waiting for you all. I am the Observer of God. Angel of the Flood. I am Tamiel. And I am here.
- Camael/Eleventh Cherub: You are, all of you, garbage. You have reigned victorious against my brethren. But you have become complacent and weak. You become soft in your own victories. But I do not seek victory. I only seek to watch you squirm. I am the Chief of the Powers. Angel of Joy. I am Camael. I am here.
- In The Rebuild of Nobody Dies:
- Iblis: I AM I. THROUGH LISCENSE OF HE WHO IS NAMED "I AM" I HAVE COME. THOUGH MY FEET MUST DRAG UPON THIS BASE EARTH ON THIS BLESSED QUEST, I HAVE COME. I AM THE SECOND OF THE MESSENGERS, TESTED AGAINST THE MIGHTY OF THOSE WHO WOULD PROFANE GLORY. YOUR MIGHT SHALL BE TESTED, MEASURED, AND FOUND WANTING BEFORE US, AND YOU SHALL BE WASHED AWAY LIKE DEBRIS AGAINST THE STREAM. I AM THE SWORD OF GOD, ANGEL OF PRIDE. I AM IBLIS. I HAVE COME.
- Shamshel:I AM. THROUGH LISCENSE OF HE WHO IS NAMED "I AM" I HAVE COME. THOUGH I SHALL TREAD THE BASE EARTH BENEATH ME, I HAVE COME. YOU HAVE BEEN TESTED, YOU HAVE BEEN FOUND WANTING, AND NOW I HAVE ARRIVED. I AM THE MOTHER OF MONSTERS, THE BURNING WHIP OF THE DESTINY OF YOUR DAMNED RACE. I AM THE MIGHTY SUN OF GOD, ANGEL OF THE MORNING. I AM SHAMSHEL. AND I HAVE COME.
- From the canonised Expanded Universe, Kei Ayanami has one:
I am. Through decent of She Who Is Called "I Think", and her Child, I was made. One of Eight, a tool for petty revenge by one too weak to seize it herself, forced to dream for fear of what I might become if left awake. Not permitted, and rarely able, to walk the Base Earth. I am not like my sisters, for I have eaten from the Fruit of the Tree of Knowledge, devoured it whole, and then reached out for more. Inhuman instincts born of the Divine cry out within me, but I reject them, for I am aware, not only of the World around me, but of what I am. What I can be, and what I will choose to be. But I have slept too long, and in awakening, I am reborn. The Earth is not Base, but it is not enough. Not enough to sate me. I am of the Nephilim, a child of Lilith and Lilim, a product of Hubris and Wrath and Lust and Envy. My mothers are monsters, and I have sculpted myself in their image. I bear no title assigned by God, for I was made by man as a weapon. But I am Kei Ayanami. And they will never see me coming.
I am. Through License of she who is called 'I THINK' I have come. Though my flippers must touch the floor of Misato's apartment, I have come. I am a penguin. I am the Eater of your fish and the Drinker of your beer. I am the Comedy Relief. Penguin of Water I am Pen-Pen. I have always been here.
- And now Jet Alone Prime has one: i am. Through the license of those who are called "humanity", i stand, though the blood of angels does not flow through me, i stand, i am a machine, a construct of steel and fury, i am the anvil upon which the enemies of man shall be broken, i am the hammer that shall crack the gates of heaven and hell, the big guy of f__king metal, i am jet alone prime! And i stand against all who dare threaten humanity!
- Revised due to new events: With Adam gone, you cannot change the fate of our Blessed Earth. Yet fate has yielded a humble reward: a unique and newborn soul. I live among its people now, hiding in plain sight, but watching over them in silence, waiting...protecting. I have witnessed their capacity for courage in the face of insurmountable odds. Though we are worlds apart, they of blood, and I of metal, there's more to us than meets the eye. I am Jet Alone Prime, and I send this message to any surviving Angels hidden in waiting amongst the the stars: I am here. I am waiting.
- Even Humanity has one now: WE ARE. THROUGH DESCENT OF SHE WHO IS CALLED "I THINK" WE ARE BORN. THOUGH SIX BILLION FEET POUND THE BASE EARTH, WE ARE AS ONE. WE ATE FROM THE TREE OF KNOWLEDGE AND STAND AGAINST THE PROGENY OF THE TREE OF LIFE. WE ARE MANY, AND YET WE ARE UNITED. THROUGH OUR DEEDS, SHALL FLESH AND MACHINE AND MIND UNITED STRIKE DOWN THOSE WHO OPPOSE OUR BILLIONS OF SELVES. LET OUR WORDS SPLIT ATOMS, AND CALL FORTH THE PRODUCE OF THE BASE EARTH TO SERVE US, AND ONLY US. WE ARE THE KILLERS OF ANGELS. AND THOSE WHO WE SPARE SHALL BECOME ONLY TOOLS IN OUR SERVICE. WE ARE THE FINAL ANGEL. WE ARE THE LILIM. CHILDREN OF LILITH, MOTHER OF MONSTERS, WHO SHOW THEIR MOTHER NO MORE MERCY THAN ANY OTHER ANGEL. WE ARE LEGION. AND WE ARE WAITING.
- Thanks to that thread, The King of the Monsters himself has one: I WHO AM BORN OF FIRE AND DEATH. MY STEPS SHAKE THE FOUNDATIONS. MORTAL MAN FEAR MY WAKE. CALLED TO SHATTER THE CHAINS OF MAN. OF RAGE AND POWER NOW SET FREE. NEITHER GOD NOR MAN DARE CHALLENGE ME. WRATH AND RUIN LEFT OF MY FAIR PREY. BUILT ONCE MORE BY THEE DO I RETURN AGAIN. EVEN IN SUBLIGATION TO MY WHIM. DOTH DEVASTATION FORMED BY ARROGANCE WALK FORTH IN THE WORLD OF MAN. I AM UNSTOPABLE BY ANY WEAPON YOU CHOOSE TO WIELD. I AM KING UPON THE THRONE OF MONSTERS I AM GODZILLA I LIVE AGAIN!
- In addition there's the boast the thread created for one of the most terrifying of tropes, a boast that is specifically used as the page quote for that trope: I Am. Through Nature of He who is called "I Speak," I Have Come. Though my Feet shall Touch upon Two Base Earths, I Have Come. My Existence has been used in Stories for generations. One is a Tale of a Cunning Rogue. One is the Epic of a Courageous Knight. Through my Influence, these two shall meet. I Am the Literary Device of Unity. I Am the Trope of Mingling Worlds. I Am Crossover.
- Personally, I think Commander Pieter Sohryu has an epic one of his own from Chapter 7 of Mother Issues:
Pieter: Ladies and gentlemen. This is Commander Sohryu. As you are no doubt aware, in a few minutes we will be engaging the Seventh Angel. It has been two months since an Angel appeared. Many of you have been wondering if they had given up. I'm sorry to disappoint you, but they have not. We do not know how many there are. What we do know, though, is that they are more intelligent than we believed. In particular, we know they can feel fear. You are all part of an organization without precedent. You are not fighting for a nation, for a belief, or even for anything as simple as revenge for Second Impact. You are fighting to give humanity a chance to survive. When you eventually die, either in battle or surrounded by your grandchildren, you will walk past the pearly gates, look God in the eye, and tell Him to get out of your seat. You will have earned that right for what you have done in your life. Doctor Akagi has told me the Angels are re-organizing. They are re-assessing. They are doing this because they are afraid. They should be. Today, we are going to remind them why. Pilots; bounce that thing's buggy ass all the way up the Stairway to Heaven. Evas Launch!
- In Chapter 20 of Uzumaki Harry, by Shadow Crystal Mage, the First Task gives us this one:
"You think I'm scared of you, you overgrown luggage set!" Harry cried, standing in the middle of the scorched circle of ground the dragon's fire had made, his voice ringing across the stands. "I'm HARRY POTTER, BITCH! I killed my first unholy force of evil when I was ONE! YEAR! OLD! WITHOUT A WAND! I've been working in the porn industry SINCE BEFORE I KNEW I COULD WRITE! I've been supporting my little brothers since the orphanage threw us out for being too awesome when I was five! I do more insane things before dawn than both Weasley twins will ever pull off during their lifespan! Slytherin's fucking BASILISK couldn't kill me when it actually managed to get one of its fangs INTO MY ELBOW! I'm building a harem and so far no one's tried to stop me, even though they know I'm doing it! And now, I HAVE MY BOOMSTICK BACK! This isn't a counter attack, suitcase! Ever since the last time someone I loved was taken away from me, I've never stopped! My whole LIFE since then has been a counter attack! You? You're not even a choice flag event in the eroge of my life! "'
- Fuck The Jesus Beam has one in the eighth chapter.
O.B.A.M.A.: "You," he said, "You're..."
Kaminic: "The only Absolution given form. The Former God of Water. The Aspect of Evolution. The Name of A Thousand Suns. I am the Alpha and Omega, Beginning and End, I am HE Who is CALLED I AM, you arrogant bastard. I am the Logos, the Garden, the Primal Meme. I am Kaminic. And," I said, twisting through fivespace in less than an instant, coming out right behind the Man who had become a God, "I am your death."
- Horus has one in the Warhammer fanfic PRIMARCHS:
Yes ... I am Warmaster ... I was not made for peace ... I was not made for the world my father saw ... my world is in endless bloodshed ... my world is the crucible of war ... my world is the grim darkness of the far future ...
I am Horus, Warmaster of Chaos. I bow to none but lords of war. Where my blade falls, death follows. Where my blade points; legions conquer. Dark has my dreams been of late, filled with moral values and family-friendly entertainment. No longer will this plague my domain! The grim darkness of the far future shall return, by my command!
- In Luminosity, Elspeth, whose powers are all based around effective communication, delivers a supremely spoiler-heavy one.
"That's right. I am the princess of the Golden Empire. I can erase a human personality with my thoughts. I remember more centuries of experiences than you can even count. I can resurrect the dead. And you are going to calm down and listen to me."
- The Dollhouse crossovernote Survivors' Hearts where just as the Big Bad is bearing down on a hostage (also evil, but more experienced in the crossing-over universe's conventions), the hostage warns that he better surrender, because an acquaintance is coming and is going to say the four scariest words in the universe, and goes on for quite some time about how he needs to give himself up now, despite holding the high ground, because once he hears those four words, he is dead meat and has no chance whatsoever, not even for mercy. This is, naturally, followed by the acquaintance arriving and saying those four words:
- The lead-up is a conventional example, and unusual in that it turns the perfectly ordinary introduction into one as well.
- In The Service's originator/extra material Monsters has Signum explaining why making her angry is bad, while in the midst of torturing someone by turning unnecessary bits of their body to ashes.
"I am not some innocent Bureau mage. I am a Wolkenritter. Hell followed in my footsteps once. I am nightmare, I am hatred, I am rage and the death of worlds. Now do you understand why you should never have sought to see how far I may be pushed?"
- In The Service itself gives us the introduction of the Immortal Order. Worse yet, they mean it. “We are the Immortal Order. Defeat is temporary. Death is meaningless.”
- A Numbered Existence gives us Sette's take on her job: "When nightmares have their own bad dreams, they dream of me."
- The Alpha Houndoom in Poké Wars: The Exigence says this prior to battling the Golem leader.
"My pack is strong. You may have taken many of us, but not all of us are gone, and you will not take another! I will show you their strength, for I carry it on my back! I will defeat you for those that have fallen!"
- Takato from the Tamers Forever Series FREQUENTLY attempts this, though it invariably comes out as Narm both In-Universe and out
Takato://moves his right leg forward and clenches his right fist// "What did you do to my friends!"
Takato (Thoughts): "Hey…how did that sound?"
Chaos: "Oh, dear God…"
- However, he does get one genuinely epic one during his battle againgst Rika.
Rika: You're underestimating us Gogglehead!
- A Hero has Dalek Sec Giving one to Kyubey:
: NOT ME. A WO-RD; IT IS A WO-RD THAT CAU-SES SUCH FE-AR, THAT E-VEN THE LORDS OF TI-ME ARE SENT TO THEIR KNE-ES
Kyubey: And what word is that?
Dalek Sec: EX-TER-MINATE!!!
- Naruto: Myoushuu no Fuuin gives us this gem when Ino tries to bully Kakashi into letting her look after Sakura after her parents die:
'Ino: "I… I…"
Inoichi': "Now wait a second, Hatake."
Kakashi: "But I'm not just Sakura's sensei. Do you know what else I am?"
Asuma: "That's enough, Kakashi."
: "No, I wasn't finished. I have seniority over both your father and your sensei, both in rank and in years of service to Konoha, little girl, yet both of them are older than I am. I've killed more, bled more, and lost more than either of them. I'm better than them, both individually and combined. And I should tell you, little girl, that if someone tried to take Sakura from me just now, I wouldn't bother being nice enough to let a court-martial go through. No, I'd use every ounce of the skills I've earned to make whoever took her regret it. Now tell me, little girl. How are you and your daddy and your sensei going to make me give Sakura to you
- Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality gives us a combined Badass Boast and Crowning Moment of Heartwarming:
Harry: I know you now I comprehend your nature, you symbolize Death, through some law of magic you are a shadow that Death casts into the world. And Death is not something I will ever embrace. It is only a childish thing, that the human species has not yet outgrown. And someday... We'll get over it... And people won't have to say goodbye any more..."EXPECTO PATRONUM!" And someday when the descendants of humanity have spread from star to star, they won't tell the children about the history of Ancient Earth until they're old enough to bear it; and when they learn they'll weep to hear that such a thing as Death had ever once existed!You are not invincible, and someday the human species will end you. I will end you if I can, by the power of mind and magic and science. I won't cower in fear of Death, not while I have a chance of winning. I won't let Death touch me, I won't let Death touch the ones I love. And even if you do end me before I end you, Another will take my place, and another, Until the wound in the world is healed at last...
- Later: "I'd fight the Dark Lord without any magic at all, if I had to. Homo sapiens didn't become the dominant species on this planet by having the sharpest claws or hardest armor - though I suppose some of that point may be lost on wizards. Still, it's beneath my dignity as a human being to be scared of anything that isn't smarter than I am."
- Power Rangers GPX; if you thought Power Rangers was silly, think again:
Sean: We're Power Rangers! We don't quit, we don't surrender, and most importantly, WE DON'T LOSE!!!
- From Only Smile When I Lie, a Doom/Loki Thor fanfic:
Doom: [smiling] I have seen enough horror in my life that I'm not impressed. I have walked the road through Hell itself. I have loved monsters and had my monstrosity loved in return. I am not afraid.
- In A Sticky Situation series, specifically the Digimon / Star Wars crossover sequel "Secret of the 327th", there is a particularly impressive one that covers plenty of events in Aayla's life both prior to the story's beginning and during the fanfiction itself.
"I am Aayla Secura. I have survived a brush with the Dark Side and recovered from losing all of my memories. I have leapt out of moving gunships and crossed chasms without bridges. I have escaped from Separatist facilities that were exploding all around me and come out without suffering a scratch. I have flown through space, blasting apart any droid that I find without prejudice. I have battled rancors, survived an assault from a swarm of Gigantoformicums and scared a bunch of pirates away from a farm by making them believe they were being attacked by a ghost. I have ridden Acklay into battle and even gone so far as to befriend them. I have destroyed Geonosian droid factories from within and faced off against zombies and Jedi infected with mind-controlling parasites. I have stood in the face of giant blasts from defoliator cannons and emerged unscathed. I have passed into the Palace of Jabba the Hutt and come out with my sanity intact. I have infiltrated an entire base of Dooku's Dark Acolytes to convert my Master back from the Dark Side and helped him to fight all of them off. I have assisted in diffusing an anti-matter bomb before it could destroy the whole of Naboo. I have fought off powerful ice monsters and run up and down on the back of the Zillo Beast – the most dangerous creature that has ever been born in this universe. I have defeated Asajj Ventress and Count Dooku, and I shall defeat you in just the same way."
- Short but sweet in A Growing Affection. The Daimyo of the Land of Fire wants to talk to Tsunade alone, but his bodyguards protest, leading to this exchange:
"Tsunade-san," the Daimyo did not bother to argue with his samurai, "If I asked you, how long would it take you to incapacitate my guards and toss them outside?"
"Assuming you didn't want them seriously injured?" she prompted, and the Land of Fire's ruler waved his hand in agreement. She looked around at the twenty, thickly muscled, well-armed, and heavily armored men. Then she shot the ranking warrior a smug grin.
"Thirty seconds," she answered, "forty, tops."
- Josh delivers one in Blood In The Water
He spread his arms wide, grinning madly. "Look around you, Haleigh! Your world is crumbling. Your Pokemon have been defeated. I am the true Master. You see, I'm the one people are truly afraid of. I'm the one who makes the likes of Giovanni and Ghetsis tremble in their sleep. I can wipe the floor with anyone. I've defeated Cynthia and Naomi
Rayquaza rose up from behind him, glaring at Haleigh.
"Do you really think," he whispered softly, "that you will stop me?")
- Second Wind: After Luffy once again survives being executed by Buggy due to a lightning bolt, he shouts this to the entire watching audience in Loguetown:
Luffy: I am the man who will become the pirate king!
- The My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic/Sonic the Hedgehog crossover Chaotic Harmony; Dr. Eggman finds out harshly what happens when you tear through a certain purple unicorn's home.
Dr. Eggman: A foolish choice, you stupid horse. Those who dare stand in my way will be destroyed. Now, be a good little horsy and back off!
: First of all, I’m not a horse, I’m a pony. A unicorn to be exact. A very powerful unicorn who has defeated more powerful enemies with the help of my friends. Second, you terrorized Ponyville, attempted to harm innocent bystanders, and caused widespread destruction on our peaceful town. But the biggest mistake you made was destroying MY
library. Now, I’m going to show you why getting a unicorn angry is a very bad idea! Cue a Sonic Rainbooming ass kicking by Rainbow Dash.
- In the Deliver Us From Evil Series, Dr. Watson delivers a passionate and pretty scary one to a captured Mook...
Watson: “If your master’s actions destroy him whom I regard as — as the best and wisest man I have ever known… make no mistake that I shall hunt down, to a man, everyone who played a part in his destruction.”
- Time Lords and Terror has the Doctor delivering a subdued but effective one to the S'Muz.
"I'm The Doctor, and these (MLP Mane Cast...and Zecora
) Are my friends. And we are going to stop you. Understood?"
- During the "Origins" arc in the Pony POV Series, Mimic gives one to Discord right before her Dying Moment of Awesome:
: You float one inch towards my daughters
, I'll kill you and seal your spirit in one of my horseshoes!
- During the Dark World Series, Banana Pie delivers one on behalf of the entire Apple/Pie family when assuring Derpy that they'll protect Dinky while she's off with the rest of the new Mane Six fighting Discord:
"They'd have to get through every Apple and Pie alive to so much as touch her. And anyone who tries will walk away on crutches!"
- Rancor manages to get one when she's literally only a few minutes old (and still adorable):
"...I am revenge. I am violence. I am passions. I am rancid to the core. I am one of the winds of chaos. I am nature's fury against nature's law. I am of the Draconequi!"
- She gets another one during her Big Entrance into Discord's throne room:
"I am Rancor Adrestia Typhon, Animosity. All behold me, and give into your passions! Your rages! Your lusts! Your dramas! Bring forth the blood of all who have wronged you upon my altar!"
- And another after she steals Destruction's power from Discord and transcends to adulthood:
"Follow your passions, let the fire devour you, become the fire itself. Let loose the savage that exists inside each of you. And bring destruction on those who you crave revenge against."
- Celestia's sister Rota Fortuna, the Goddess of Fate, gives one to the Eldritch Abominations she helped imprison in Tartarus, during her cameo in Clover's 7 Dreams/Nightmares chapter.
"You should leave all the same. Or would you rather I 'kick your flanks', as she so eloquently put it, again?"
- The Magician Alicorn, Amicitia, has the following as her very first line in the series after having ascended from Dark World!Twilight:
"With the rainbow of light in one hoof. And the rainbow of darkness in the other, I do not write the rules, I do not oversee the rules, I am the rules! I AM MAGIC!"
- Shining Armor gets a good one at the climax of his arc, after fighting his way through Makarov's prison complex in order to rescue the rest of Misfit Actual. The best part is, he isn't bragging; it's a simple statement of fact.
Captive Audience: But, how'd you get here?
- Chrysalis gives an epic villainous one to the Unicorn Interviewer in the Wedding Arc after the latter is freed from her control:
"I knew fate would contort and twist back upon itself before ever allowing me to claim my hard earned victory. But tell fate this
, Half-Light Dusk
. If the game will cheat before letting me win, I simply have to change the rules. I WILL stand on equal footing with her. I will no longer be her or anyling else's slave. Not her, not Cocoon's, not my flesh, and most certainly not that mad creature that thinks himself king of everything. He's next on my list
. So tell me I am doomed, tell me I have no chance of winning, that I never had any chance of winning, I've heard it many times before, and I have proven them all wrong! I always grant those who look down on me their just reward. Send me to Hell and I SWEAR
by every changeling that has ever lived, I will devour it from the inside out like a cancer!
Tell me an infinite number of others have made the same boast and failed and were but toys for Havoc
in the end, I will be the one to make that boast reality! Lock the gates of Heaven and I will break through them! Dump me in Oblivion and I will claw my own way out! I've come too far, I have struggled for too long, to see all I have made with literal sweat, blood, and tears, to crumble to dust now. I refuse to lose!"
"Have you figured it out cattle? You didn't trap me: I am the trap
- In The Machinations of a Trickster MLP:FiM, the main character Karen finds that a council mage is planning on usurping Celestia and Luna and the following discussion happens
More-than Tardy: “Had I known of your abilities I would have come more prepared. But since the game is up there is no more need for subtlety. Leave Canterlot before the sun has set and I will not hunt you, you can keep your life and watch from afar as I take what belongs to me.”
Karen: “How about no.”
More-than Tardy: “If you remain, I will take everything you cherish and twist it beyond recognition. All that you once looked on with pride and love will be a broken mockery of what it was. An ugly, corrupted, deformed shadow of everything you hold dear. I will not kill you, when I am done with my work, you will kill yourself.”
Karen:“And what makes you think I just won't take all of this to Celestia and have her deal with you mr. Oh-so-scary.”
More-than Tardy: “Had your intentions been of exposing me you would have gone straight to her. Instead you remained and is feebly trying to outmaneuver me, you cannot win. I have made traitors out of foals, twisted them with greed and hate until they murdered their own parents for their power. I have tortured more ponies than any monster ever has, turned their souls into empty despair and burned their hearts. You cannot win, you cannot stop me. Nopony can.”
Karen: “You seem to forget something.”
More-than Tardy: “I take it you are about to enlighten me.”
Karen: “I am not a pony, and you have no idea who you are up against.”
More-than Tardy: “I think I shall enjoy this.”
- To drive the point home, back when Karen had just entered Equestria, he took on Celestia and Luna at the same time, and held his ground.
- In Angrboda's Children, Hela, who looks about nine, is under threat by a group of Aesir. She points a bony finger at them, and says,
Hela: Death I am, and death I shall be to you if you lay hands on me, with diseases that no healer can cure nor your golden apples abate!
- In Fallout Equestria: Heroes, a Steel Ranger equipped with a Balefire Egg Launcher informs Silver Storm that Blackwater sent him to kill her.
Silver Storm: Do your worst. And when you're done? I'll climb out of the crater. Fight my way through every last one of you. And kill Blackwater myself. You tell her that. Tell her you killed me. And that I'm going to kill her back.
- Harry delivers one when he gets sick of the Mouth of Sauron taunting them over Frodo's possessions.
The Mouth: Ah, the black wizard speaks at last. And I see you have brought companions, lesser in power, but still, you would have been useful to Lord Sauron if you had been but willing to serve him. As it is, you are mere fleas compared to the might of the Lord of Barad-dûr.
: And why would I want to serve a being that is restricted to existence as a giant eyeball on a tower, who sends petty emissaries to lie to us and try and crush us with despair? If Sauron had the One Ring, he would not send something as pitiful as you out to 'negotiate' with us
] You spoke of whether any of us were fit to negotiate with you. When I look at my companions I see people of power, nobility, impeccable lineage and courage
. You have the Royal House of Rohan
, whose current King fought the Witch King of Angmar, a millennia old sorcerous wraith and your master's second to a draw
. You have the new King of Gondor and Arnor
, who under the name of Thorongil burnt out your miserable lair of Umbar and other deeds too numerous to name
. You have Gandalf the White, a being of such power and wisdom that you could not know or understand a fraction of his thoughts
, who was sent back by Eru himself
to face your Master's evil after fighting a dark creature of the same order as your Master to the death
. And then you have me. I, who faced a Balrog of Morgoth, Durin's bane, and lived to tell the tale, I who fought Saruman the accursed and cast him down, I who drove the Witch King of Angmar into the earth with a power this world has not witnessed since the elder days
, I who killed a Dark Wizard of equal power to any of the Nazgul in single combat at the age of 17, after drawing at the age of 14 and driving him off at 11
. And that is just the beginning, you miserable piece of Black Numenorean slime. My fellow wizards and witches have faced dark wizards whose cruel deeds and power would curdle the blood in your veins since they were little more than children.
All my other companions have been slaughtering your master's minions in uncountable numbers
. I think Sauron is frightened. He has seen his greatest servants fended off and destroyed, some by myself personally, by our power. [Beat
] And what are you in comparison to that? You are simply the latest and by far the most pitiful of his attempts to destabilise us. Run back to your Master, wretch, grovel in front of him and tell him that he is right to fear us. We have courage, steel, powers your master will never understand
and the strength to wield them effectively. Go, now, while we feel merciful, you worthless piece of shit
. Or I will fight you to the pain. I feel I should explain at this point what that means. To the pain means the first thing you will lose will be your feet below the ankles. Then your hands at the wrists. Next your nose. After that, you will lose will be your left eye followed by your right. But your ears you keep and I'll tell you why. So that every shriek of every child at seeing your hideousness will be yours to cherish. Every babe that weeps at your approach, every woman who cries out, "Dear Eru! What is that thing?" will echo in your perfect ears. That is what to the pain means. It means I leave you in anguish, wallowing in freakish misery forever.
Harry: But they probably do that anyway, don't they? So you hide yourself behind a mask of metal and words that drip foul poison, hiding your twisted visage and soul from the world because you can't bear others seeing it. You serve the biggest bully because you think he can protect you from the screams and contempt as people see how far you have debased yourself in your fruitless quest for power.
- In My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, Princess Celestia and Princess Luna raise the sun and the moon, and phrases used in the series such as "thank Celestia," "for Celestia's sake," and "as Celestia is my witness" being thrown around in the show suggest a divine status, though of course you can't throw the word 'goddess' around in a kids' show. Fanfic authors greatly enjoy writing Badass Boasts for them.
“I have survived more than a millennium for every year that you’ve existed. Do not presume to lecture me on the nature of power, Twilight Sparkle.”
- Celestia can also pull off a few good Badass Boasts:
The sun above flared from yellow to dazzling blue-white.
- The God Empress Of Ponykind:
- Celestia gets a few, being The Emperor and all, such as this one during her fight against Queen Metamorpha:
"You are nothing! You are no more than a child lashing out against forces they could never understand! I am the Bane of Chaos, the Anathema, the Light of the Immaterium and Beacon for all whom travel its currents! I am the Empress of Ponykind, the mightiest being to have ever walked the land, and I shall smite you and purge your pathetic race from this earth for daring to challenge my power!"
- There's also her comment during her and Luna's fight with the Windigos in the Warp:
- Commander Icewind to Sombra when the latter takes over the Crystal Kingdom:
"You wish to take over the Crystal Kingdom’s inhabitants? You may as soon as the last of my blood has been spilled!"
- Later, Blackmane during the siege of Aesir Pass:
"Know this, Servants of Sombra! I am Blackmane, Wolf Lord and loyal servant of Icewind and Equestria! My ancestors tamed this land eons before your kind even had a coherent thought! I have slain wolves and other beasts with my bare hooves, killed Diamond Dogs and minotaurs in service to my lord and my Empress! And you? You are nothing compared to a true warrior, and I will slaughter you and your ilk with nary an ill thought!"
- Celestia gets another one during the Siege of Canterlot when fighting the Shadowbolts:
"Did you really think that you pathetic wastes of flesh could stand against me? I forged this world from dust and breathed life into it. I commanded the celestial bodies, and they moved at my words. I defeated the Windigoes and stood in the face of Discord, and you think that your gods will grant you victory over me? Your gods lead you to destruction, and I am more than happy to deliver it."
- The sequel The Warmistress of Equestria continues the trend. Anlindē and Luna trade a couple in Chapter 4. First, when Luna finds and tries to arrest her for using the Warp:
Anlindē: I will not be treated like some beast! I am Anlindē, Seer of the Clan Elynia, devoted leader of deer, and I will erase you from existence for your intrusion!
- Then, when Luna No Sells her attack and prepares to actually start fighting:
: You may be a powerful mage, deer. But I am the Warmistress of Equestria
, sister of Celestia, Empress of Ponykind and Forger of Worlds. And I shall make you suffer for threatening my subjects.
- In the Portal 2 fanfic "Cake and Lies", Alternate Dimension/Wheatley delivers an hilarious one to GLaDOS after she insults him one time too many and he is escaping the test chambers:
Wheatley: I HAVE A BLOODY DOCTORATE!
Wheatley: THAT'S DOCTOR MORON TO YOU!
- Getting Back on Your Hooves: During the Mane Cast's final confrontation with Checker Monarch in a dreamscape, she threatens them by transforming into an alicorn. They're not impressed, and Rarity explains why:
- The Prayer Warriors exchange them with Hades during the last chapter of The Evil Gods Part 1.
- Clarisse gets one before her death in Threat of Satanic Commonism
Clarisse: "To all those that want to fight me, beware, God is on my side. Jesus will have his revenge on Soviet Russia. Soon a greater Prayer Warrior coming and he will kill you communist leader John Lennon. Amen."
- In Equal And Opposite Attraction, Negi is testing Nanoha in her capacity as a magic fighter. She out-maneuvers him and powers up a Starlight Breaker:
"I have fought demons, monsters, robots, and summons, I have faced down the darkest depths and rescued my precious ones from its grasp. There is no obstacle I cannot surpass, no foe I that can outrun my shot. I am Takamachi Nanoha, AND I AM NOT A PERVERT!
- In The Pride of Sunnydale, Xander delivers this example: "I am a vampire hunter with over a hundred kills, I have slain an Octress Hound, an M'doka Fire Breather, a Sungoh, a Frangth, a Dessemer, and the last of the Brotherhood of Seven. I bested and slew the Vampire Warriors Three in free combat, and destroyed the demon Moloch the Corrupter."
- For the sake of context, he was possessed by a lion instead of a hyena and retained the possession."
- Tenhawk's Journeyverse contains several examples. One of the simplest is from Year Zero: East Coast and Down: "I'm sorry, I didn't introduce myself... I'm Xander Harris, Independent Demon Hunter. I save the world."
- From We Three Kings: "Nice weapon." Xander said, standing in full armored glory a bare twelve feet from the demon lord as it reached it's feet again, "but I wield Elanthielle. Sister weapon to Excalibur, Mjolnir, Sienele, and Turok. Let's see who has the most powerful ally in this battle, Demon. My money ain't on you."
- In the chapter 24 of Tengen Toppa Gurren Solvernia, Nia gives three badass boasts in sucession:
- First: "My brother loved me! But now he's dead! He's gone! But his love is still with me! In my heart, and in my memories…that is where he continues to live! And even without him…as long as our spirits remain unbroken, he will always live! And we will be able to fight back all the worst nightmares of the world! Dawn IS coming! I AM NIA THE DIGGER, WE ARE TEAM DAI-GURREN, AND WE KNOW THAT THE DAWN IS COMING!"
Yoko: "With the memories of the man we loved!
Nia: "We move together towards a new future!"
Yoko: "The prayer of a maiden is heard!"
Nia: "The tide of battle is turned upside down!"
Both: "SISTERLY COMBINING! DAYAKKAISER SOLVERNIA!"
Yoko: In the hell...]]
Both: "DO YOU THINK WE ARE?"
Nia: "Emerging from the shadows of despair!"
Prince Simon: "The sword of our souls cleaves through the darkness!"
Nia: "Armored by our courage…"
Simon: "...and our trust in our friends!"
Both: "The Great Protector! The Knight of Dai-Gurren!"
I am no one's doll!
- Zerael, Spiral Knight on Lordgenome's side also gives one:
"YOU LOWLY HUMANS COULD NEVER UNDERSTAND! THE MIGHT, THE INEXHAUSTIBLE POWER THAT FLOWS FROM THE SPIRAL THRONE OUT TO THE FOUR CORNERS OF THE WORLD AND EVEN INTO THE DEPTHS OF SPACE! HOW COULD YOU APPRECIATE ITS ABSOLUTE GLORY? HOW COULD YOU COMPREHEND THE MARVELLOUS FEATS OF THE SPIRAL KING, SOVEREIGN OVER ALL THE EARTH? YOU CANNOT! YOU DARE TO DOUBT HIS INFINITE SPLENDOUR? BLASPHEMY! HERESY! SHEER SHORTSIGHTED ARROGANCE! ALL SHALL PERISH BEFORE THE ENDLESS MIGHT OF THE SPIRAL EMPIRE! ALL SHALL FALL BEFORE HIS MIGHT, AS IS RIGHT! NONE WILL BE ABLE TO WITHSTAND OUR COSMIC STRENGTH, OUR DIVINE HONOR! AND WHEN AAAALL HAS FALLEN THERE WILL BE NOUGHT BUT OUUUUUR EVERLAAAAAAAAAASTING VEEEEEEEHCTOOOOOOOORRRYYYYYY!"
- Kiyal found him be hilarious, and developed romantic interest in him because of this.
- Burning Black has this in Act 4, Chapter 22, when Remy and Timmy face off at the lot of Dark Spire 2. Timmy has spent the past few hours going through the worst possible night he's ever been through, is running on magical fumes, and Remy has just impaled him on a sword not two minutes ago when he finally gets fed up and growls this out:
"You have really, really
gotten on my nerves tonight, Remy. You've kidnapped my friends, you hurt your own fairy, you teamed up with pixies to murder Timmy Turner
, you threw my anti-fairies out a window while they were hurt, you clocked me on the head with a freaking fireplace poker
, and worst of all, ruined
the dress Caleb bought
The boy billionaire's eyes seemed to just bug out of his head at the list of crimes.
"So you know what? I'm going to tell you something, and you'd better listen good, because I'm only saying it once." [[He takes Remy's dagger out of his hand and holds it up to show him.]] "I am an immortal; I can never die. I can take this dagger, which has your name written on it, and stab myself in the heart with it. Just stab it right in there. It'll hurt, but it won't kill me. I'll bleed all over it, and then I'll send it to the police, with a note, that says 'Remy Buxaplenty used this knife to kill Timothy Neogene, adopted son of Hounder and heir to the Hounder Organization.'"
"And then I'll go to your house and lie down on the floor and wait. Wait for the cops to show up and take pictures and collect evidence and put me in a body bag for autopsy. And you'll be hauled in and arrested and charged with my
murder. And I'll just get up and walk out of the morgue. Just like that."
"Now, Remy, be glad, so very
glad, I'm the good
Cue Timmy singlehandedly destroying a 500 foot tall spire with a snap of his fingers by launching it into the skies and detonating it as a magic missile.
- The Kings In The Mountains has Gilgamesh deliver one to the Reapers as they invade.
yourselves are the ones who come to conquer my kingdom? It has shattered, and my people have fallen and they have forgotten those golden times, but all this world is mine! And you think you will take it?
Machines, tools? You think you can destroy even the pathetic fragments which are left of my realm?”
“Let me show you what tools I
have. Let me show you what submits to me!”
“You come for my kingdom's destruction? Then learn of creation! Learn of how Heaven and Earth were divided and Hell was sealed below! Learn it from the tool of the gods which was Creation itself! Learn this and die!”
- The Immortal Game has Twilight's comment during her last fight with General Esteem (in a Shout-Out to Prototype), when he realizes she's become too strong for him and attempts to flee.
- She gets another big one near the end of the story.
"I am Twilight Sparkle, and I am the end of war."
- Thinking In Little Green Boxes has the following from the "Punisher's War Journal":
I've finally figured out how to bypass the defenses of Voldemort's hideout. It was actually easier than dealing with the Mob, since Death Eaters aren't quite as good as taking pain as they are dishing it out. They also have absolutely no experience or talent for psychological warfare or interrogation, rather they just choose to cast a few spells and expect things to work. They also don't expect people to be able to dodge. They called me a muggle, whatever that means, I called them target practice.
- Madhouse is full of these from the Chaos Gods and their followers, complete with Break Them by Talking, discussions on What Is Evil?, recruitment offers, and Badass Boasts. It is 2975 words of despair. And then one lone Imperial priest shuts. Them. All. Up.
So come on, lost children. We’ve all made our choices, and now those choices have made us. I shall bring you into His light with cleansing flame and prayers, and redeem us all in death. Come one or come all, you shall not put a foot into this hallowed ground while I still draw breath.
For I have faith, and that is enough.
- Coincidences and Misunderstandings has a rather dark one when Beast Boy threatens Raven over the fact she's apparently dating Jinx.
Raven: "Let me be clear, Garfield Mark Logan. You will keep silent about my outing, not out of loyalty or friendship, but because you know how quickly I can destroy you should you get in my way. Speak, and I will demonstrate exactly how cruel the daughter of Trigon the Terrible can be."
Beast Boy: "Except you're not your father! The four of us can take you on."
Raven: "If you couldn't even scratch Him, how could you possibly hope to defeat His killer?"
- Calvin and Hobbes: The Series: Calvin attempts one as Batboy:
"I am Batboy! Defeater of all evil and evil like things. The new form of bat super hero mutant things! The new form of humans who have bat DNA! And you can not possibly..."
- He later manages to deliver a proper one after going through a lot of Character Development, and it astounds the rest of the cast:
Well, I have news for you! You're not taking a bit of Jethrick back to Planton V! But I do have something else you can take back to your people. Nesbin:
What's that? Calvin:
A word of warning! As long as the Supreme Earth Potentate is around, Annkor... is ... defended!
- For all that he tends to suffer from The Worf Effect, Kakashi gives an awesome one to the Slender Man in Black Flames Dance in the Wind: Rise of Naruto.
Kakashi: "You're wasting your time. You couldn't break my father, and you will not break me. So go ahead, do what you want. Peek out from behind corners. Stand over me while I sleep. Follow me wherever I go. It makes no difference. At this point, there is nothing you can do to me, and nothing you can take from me. You did your worst, and I made you bleed on your own turf. So try me; we'll see how tough you are in MY world."
- In Magical Pony Lyrical Twilight, a crossover between My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic and Lyrical Nanoha, when Princess Celestia needed to let the Belkan navy know why what it would be a very bad idea for them to target Equestria, this was what she had to say.
“Let me explain something to you, Wilhelm Albrecht the Second, Admiral of the Fourth Fleet, because it seems that you are woefully unaware of the forces with which you treat. I am Princess Celestia of Equestria. In the ancient tongue of the dragons, I am Vaal Kreinsejun and Vaal Unslaad Yol, the Sun-Queen and the Eternal Fire. To the zebra tribes I am mama wa majira ya joto, the mother of summer. To the griffon clans, I am the sun-tyrant and the witch-princess. And to your Sankt Kaiser, I was Kind der Sonne, Sun-Child.
I am fire and heat and light. I bring dawn and dusk, and warmth and order follows in my wake. I am older and brighter than the very stars and I bow to nobody. You think your fleet invincible. You think yourself unbeatable. However, should your ships dare to enter my world’s borders, I will be more than happy to prove you wrong. Your machines will melt. Your fleet will be turned to glowing slag. Your soldiers will die burning and blind, and you yourself will be reduced to nothing more than ash. Because it does not matter how great your fleet is. It does not matter how many machines or men you have, nor how thick your armor or how powerful your magic. I will turn the full fury of the sun upon you without hesitation. You. Will. Burn.”
- Justice League of Equestria:
- The Princess of Themyscira:
- Diana's statement when facing down Ares' demonic army:
"Come, you spawns of hell! Come and face me, and I swear by Athena and the gods of Olympus that I shall send you back to the pit from whence you came!"
- Ares himself gets a villainous one during the climatic fight between him and Diana:
"Did you honestly think you could challenge me?! I am the God of War! I killed thousands during the War in Heaven! I drove Nightmare Moon from the steps of Olympus, and I broke the walls of Tartarus! Why do you not see that anything you do is pointless, Amazon?!"
- Sonic X: Dark Chaos
- Maledict introduces himself with an epic one in Episode 63.
"I am who I AM. I am the Master of the Emeralds. I am the god of this world, the Evil One, prince of the powers of the air. My eyes bring perdition, my hands reap what is sown. My words strike fear into the hearts of mortals. I am Lord of the Demons, Conqueror and Unifier of the universe. I am the roaring lion that devours the souls of my enemies! I am the Old Serpent, the Dragon that cleanses the stars, maker of all the dark places of creation. I am the devil, the one called Satan!
- In Episode 75, Jesus gets an awesome one too;
"The Son of Man didn't come to be served... but to serve up your ass on a platter!"
- Worldwar: War of Equals: When the Race invade Iran, President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad declares Jihad on the alien invaders, stating that "It is the sacred duty of every Muslim to destroy the reptilian invaders from hell."
- Ichigo gives one regarding Tatsuki in After The Fairy Tale Ends.
Ichigo: "Come back when you've got a captain's haori. Matter of fact, come back when you've got a captain's haori and two friends that also have captain's haoris. No, better make that three friends, because by the time you're at that level it will take at least four captains to hold me back."
- Shinji gives one to a Leviathan in the Neon Genesis Evangelion/Mass Effect cross over Alpha and Omega.
Leviathan: "WHO ARE YOU TO STAND BEFORE US, TINY ONE?"
Shinji: "I am Lilim, the last Angel. I am also Adam and Lilith, the first Angels. I represent the beginning and end of all things as well as everything that came between. Who are you... to stand before me?"
- In System Restore, Togami, having survived the first murder in this fic, gives one to the rest of the students when they're assembled after the second murder, inviting the murderer to confess.
Togami: Yes, you heard me. I know you're listening. We've solved a murder before, and we'll do it again. You know what this entails, and you can save us all a lot of trouble by confessing now. Go on.
- ''The Warlord Era: Internal Perspectives by Blex Luthor finishes gang leader Sai Mock's monologue with:
Sai Mock: Let 'em come. I've stood against hurricanes. Against gangsters. Against lawmen. Against armies. The Pig Pen couldn't kill me. The Liquid Swordsman couldn't kill me. The Yasuki still can't kill me. These silk shirts won't either. I went into the Tong Wars as a boy and came out as a king. I am exactly who I say I am. My branches reach far and my roots run deep. I'm ready. Let 'em come.
- Another MLP example: The Twilight Child,
- When the main character's been on the receiving end of a "Freaky Friday" Flip from Trixie for humiliating her. After talking Trixie out of running, she decides to point out one last thing, as a warning.
Midday: You're a firecracker, Trixie. Me? I am the sun.
- As Princess Luna and the Changeling Queen are fighting, and the Changeling Queen is beating Luna, she asks what she's got.
Queen Chrysalis: You haven't stopped me, and you haven't slowed me down. You're the weaker of the two sisters and we both know it, so the fact that I beat your sister so easily doesn't say much for your chances. So why oh why are you smiling?
Princess Luna: Well, you do have your army, and all that stolen love you're being fuelled by, which I presume requires access to Shining Armor to maintain, and you are, without a doubt, a difficult opponent. Most of the foes I've fought were brainless brutes, or the occasional animated corpse, but there's something I have that you don't. (glances up at the sky)
Queen Chrysalis: Really? What's that? Suicidal overconfidence? I'm stronger, faster, more powerful than you "princess", so why are you smiling?
) Because, I brought my dog
. (Cue Changeling Queen being Trampled Underfoot by Cerberus.
- RWBY Reckoning has Sky Lark threatening Darrel with Cardin's supposed power. Darrel isn't intimidated.
- The Bleach fic Hell Butterfly has Yamamoto and Barragan face off, and they battle in Badass Boasts more than in actual combat.
- In A Protector's Pride Orihime gets an awesome one.
Orihime: "This is my power. You may be able to rot away flesh, bone and sinew. You may be able to decompose earth and metal and even dissipate reiatsu. But my technique is based on none of those, nothing but the eternal force of my will to protect! This is my power, Baraggan, Lord of Hueco Mundo! This power that intrudes on Kami's territory! The power to reject and reshape reality! And I reject you and your power! Tsubaki! Koten Zanshun! I reject!"
- Yamamoto gives a brilliant one to Hell.
Yamamoto: "Allow me to tell you exactly whom you are dealing with. My name is Yamamoto Genryusai Shigekuni. I have lived for millennia, in times of war and in times of peace. I have made damning mistakes. I have won impossible victories. I have committed terrible atrocities, ordered and led utter genocide, not once, not twice, but thrice in the name of world balance, in the name of sanity, in the name of the human soul. I am he who conquered Soul Society and united the strongest under my rule! I am he who fought and survived the First Quincy, Yhwach, one thousand years ago, destroying his powers! I have had one thousand years since then to increase my powers, Hell! Now taste the ever-burning flame of my soul! Bankai! Zanka no Tachi. Now... can the fires of Hell compare to me?"
- In Aurora, Luna gives a serious one to Dawnbringer right before the Final Battle:
"Your life is the blink of an eye. I have slain more creatures than you could even imagine. I saved this world, and then brought it to its knees. Your power means nothing to me!"
- A Brief History of Equestria: Talonhoof the Reviled' only message to the newly-formed Equestrian government, sewn onto the flank of a pony he allowed to escape from his clutches in the place of his cutie mark.
Talonhoof the Reviled: I Come. Through the License of my Hate-Forged Will, I Come. With my Wings and my Talons I Dominate the Base Earth as I Come for You. I am the Scourge of the Spirits. For if you had not committed great sins I would not exist. My Air Legions shall darken the Skies. My Dog Hordes will sunder the earth. With my lance I will gut all I survey. I Am Talonhoof. I Am Coming.
- The Thor fanfic Ordinary Love is an AU in which Odin banishes both Thor and Loki to Midgard, and chapter 29 has this from Frigga:
Frigga: (upon being told that Thor and Loki are in danger) Tell [Sif] my sons — both of my sons — are to be retrieved. At any cost. If not, Midgard shall learn the wrath of the All-Father can pale in comparison to my own.
- In Getting It Right, when threatened by three Shinigami, Ichigo has this to say:
Ichigo: "I eat Bankais and Arrancar for breakfast."
- In Life After Hayate Tiida Lanster gives one on behalf of his companion, Vita Yagami, when speaking to Number Seven on the Bureau's Most Wanted list. After tell the criminal that he's there to negotiate a surrender, and Vita is there to kill the criminal if Tiida fails, the criminal threatens to kill his hostages.
Tiida: "That only gives her an excuse. You know I have to try and stop you then, and that means letting her do what she does best. Belkan Knights don't think in terms of minimum acceptable force. She's a Wolkenritter. The only thing she cares about is the quickest and most efficient way to render you inert. She doesn't care if you survive it. You can kill the hostages, you can even take a shot at killing me. But it won't solve your problems and you won't be walking out of here that way."
- Moderately controversial Mega Crossover The Open Door features one in a wedding proposal:
Lars: Yeah, but you look and, most importantly, act like you're fifteen.
Skuld: I am a goddess, twice over. Such things are trifling considerations.
Lars: Oh, so it's a 'whose voice can get more reverb' pissing contest is it? Well I am a daemon, and while this form may be nascent, the essence within me can trace back tens of millions of years. I have infinity behind and before me. A paltry three millennia means nothing to me.
Skuld: Then we have time to wait for you to get over your hang ups once we are through this, but so long as we fight with deities we do not have time in the present. We will marry
- The Equestrian Wind Mage: As they're trying to escape King Sombra, Shining Armor asks Maulgrim if he can run in all that armor. His response?
Maulgrim: Little shrimp, I can run with a mountain on my back.
- In Origin Story, Alex Harris has a little "discussion" with Tony Stark on the SHIELD Helicarrier about her problems with how he's enforcing the Metahuman Registration Act:
Alex Harris: “I am unilaterally declaring Florida a free state. I am defending the Constitution, something you swore an oath to do when you took government office, I might point out.”
Tony Stark: “But you can't...”
Harris: “Oh can't I? What are you going to do, send in the army to catch one person?” (grabs Stark by the lapels and lifts him into the air) "Here's what's about to happen. I'm going to leave. When I've left, you're going to turn this crate around, or so help me God, I will knock it out of the sky and into space. If I need your help, I'll ask for it. Until then, stay in New York!”
- In a Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann-inspired Chrono Cross fanfic Heaven-Smiting Masked Magician, Guile frequently gives out this.
- For starters: "Are you aware of who I am?"note
- Then there's one with a pose which is modified from Kamina's 'pierce the heavens'.
- "Let me tell you something important now. I am Guile the Masked Magician. I am a man of indomitable spirit and masculinity. I do the impossible, break the unbreakable, and beat the unbeatable." He paused. "With my magic," Guile clenched his right fist and raised it to the point his knuckles were facing the sky, before shouting, "I shall smite the heavens!"
- "I am Guile the Masked Magician. I am a man of indomitable spirit and masculinity. I do the impossible, break the unbreakable, and beat the unbeatable. My magic...is the magic that smites the heavens!"
- In Field Of Innocence, Lu Ten finds out that Ozai has been using training sessions as an excuse to physically abuse his children, and gives him a threat made of pure, undiluted Big Brother Instinct.
Lu Ten: Now you listen to me, Uncle, and listen good. If you hurt either one of those kids again, if you say anything to make them feel bad, if you so much as look at them wrong, I will face you in an Agni Kai and I will break and humiliate you in front of the whole court. I don't care who you are. I don't care if our family is watching. I'll hold nothing back, I will destroy you!
- The Golden Age series has one courtesy of Commander Keelus, as he prepares to take on the Alternian Empire's attack.
"In this civilization, in our civilization, a helmsman commands his own ship!"
- In Kitsune no Ken: Fist of the Fox, Sai gives seven simple words in response to Aoi, to whom he's about to give a nasty No-Holds-Barred Beatdown as revenge for force-feeding him an overdose of drug-pills that put Sai into a coma and almost on the brink of death and for, just at that moment, attempting to rape Ino, Sai's love interest.
Sai: Death knows better than to touch me.
- In Spark of Creation, Obito tries to prevent Naruto from destroying Pain's rinnegan by warping to their location with kamui, only for it to fail instantly and Naruto to warn him telepathically.
Naruto: "If I had wanted you to move, I'd have told you where you were going."
- The basic plot of To Be A King is that Merlin has been crowned king of the country Carthis. Since he's a bastard son and was a peasant for most of his life, a good Badass Boast is sometimes necessary to let everyone know exactly what they're dealing with.
Merlin: I have survived more battles in the last eleven years than this entire kingdom has seen in over a century. I have fought trolls and griffins and questing beasts and sidhe. I have destroyed two immortal armies singlehandedly. I killed the High Priestess Nimueh with a single blow. I defeated the immortal spirit of Cornelius Sigan and held audience with the Fischer King himself. I alone among mortal men have survived the touch of the Dorocha. I have wielded the Cup of Life and held the power of Life and Death in my hands. I have seen the land of Avalon and glimpsed the future in the Crystal Cave. I have faced Morgana in battle and walked away the victor. Tell me, Lord Tennison, do you still think me untried?
- The epic Supernatural fic Down To Agincourt has Castiel mentioning that he's accurate with ranged weapons at a distance of up to a mile. Bewildered, Dean mentions the curvature of the Earth as a limiting factor.
Castiel: I can calculate that in the time it takes to pull the trigger.