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Awesome: Warning! Readers Advisory!
  • Derek the Bard defeats an evil time-traveling Black Lantern vampire on Christmas Eve. By casting Dragon Slave.
  • And when the vampire returns and traps him in a void-dimension in episode 18, the Bard uses the Full Body Bind Curse. "Until the next time you come back, this is Derek the Bard. Be seeing you, bitch!"
  • Winning the duel against immortal book-thief Dorian Gray in episode 19.
    • And afterward:
    • "Just so we're clear, I'm not going to kill you. I want you to take a message back to all your little evil friends out there to please, for the love of God, leave me and this library alone. I didn't sign on to fight the forces of evil, I just signed on to maintain these books. But if you put my back up against a wall you would not BELIEVE how unpleasant I can make your existence. I'm not a fighter, a thief, an adventurer, or a gunslinger. I... am a LIBRARIAN. And if you force me to, I will take all the secrets locked within these stacks and I WILL use them against you! Do we have an understanding, Mister Gray?"
  • The Bard reviewed The Toxic Avenger for Better Off Read and drew a heap of praise from Lloyd Kaufman, president of Troma studios, for his work!
    • Praise, and an offer for voiceover work in future trailers!
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