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HamburgerTime2018-05-19 10:51:29

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Chapter 21: ...And I Storm the Castles

The attack on Konganji begins! We head over there to find that the Angels have busted through the main gate, seemingly killing Ganesha and Berserker, so we don't get to fight them, sadly.

Parvati: My poor, misguided son... I feel we'll see him again; I don't sense that he's be observed out of existence, but even so... Also I sense an annoying maze in there; he would've been helpful with that.

Lilim: This place reminds me of my mama! She lived here, you know, before that buzzkill Flynn killed her...

Nanashi: Huh. Demons have families. Who knew?

Thoth: We have families 'cause you humans believe we do! We exist to provide explanations for your mysteries, remember - you saw us as living like you!

Nanashi: I still don't understand how gods and demons were created by humans. I always hear that gods created the world.

Thoth: We did, because YOU believed we did!

Nanashi: But, wait, wouldn't that mean humans came first? I'm very confused.

Vouivre: What a silly human; he still sees time as linear!

Moh Shuvuu: Failure as a human!

Isabeau also meets us here and rejoins the group, though everyone should now be caught up to her - remember what I said about her being a Crutch Character, yes?

Welcome to the most obnoxious dungeon in the game bar the final dungeon. The Divine Powers have evidently beefed up security from when the Gaeans ran the place, so now the teleported maze is at least twice as big and comprises multiple floors. Funtimes. To begin we take the portal to the west, then from there, the one to the north.

Taraka: Well well well, what have we here? Some little shrimp lost in the maze, huh? You know I might join you just out of pity, Nancy Boy!

Nanashi: I need all the help I can get, but... she's going to be a chore, I can tell.

Prometheus: In about five seconds I feel I will be in a discomforting presence...

Beat

Da Peng: Hey you brats, what's with all the ruckus!? Tring to sleep here.

Prometheus: ...of course. a large avian. I shall make my exit that way...

Da Peng: Who the Hell are you!? You got something against birds? Huh? HUH!?

Persephone: Oh do leave that old fool be. His fears are not entirely irrational...

Athena: Aha! Sister Persephone! At last a voice of reason among this crowd! I've been stuck with my least favorite brothers for what seems like forever!

Ares: ...so that's when I crammed the other eye up his ass!

Dionysus: How perfectly marvelous. We must drink over anecdotes again sometime!

FEMME TARAKA

Character notes: A powerful female Rakshasa in Hindu lore. She dwelled in a dark forest and ate humans that entered it. Sh'es one of the villains in the epic poem Ramayana, where she fights and is eventually killed by Prince Rama, avatar of Vishnu. Phys specialist.

Personality notes: Talks like a really angry female gym coach.

FLIGHT DA PENG

Character notes: Quite literally "Huge Bird," a Da Peng is another bizarre creature from China. As its name implies it's an absolutely enormous bird, said to be so huge its true size is incomprehensible. It's called a Peng in bird form, but can also shape shift into an equally large fish called a Kun, which is reflected in Kaneko's art. Wind and ailment user.

Personality notes: Perpetually crabby old man. Prometheus is afraid off him.

REAPER PERSEPHONE

Character notes: The goddess of both spring and death in Greek lore, she is the daughter of Zeus and Demeter. She was kidnapped by Hades, the god of death, and forced to marry him (though despite this he actually treated her a lot better than many Greek gods treated women). Hades' gardener tricked her into eating the food of the underworld, meaning she could not return even if she wanted to; Zeus eventually brokered a compromise between her, Hades, and Demeter, where she would spend half the year with her mother and half with Hades. Thus we get the changing of the seasons. Some mythologians believe she was the main death deity of a people conquered by the Greeks, who then forced her into a secondary role to their death god. Ice and Dark-user.

Personality notes: Moody Goth girl.

The northern warp spits us out in the section called "Training Hall A," specifically the first floor. Many of the passages are blocked by Wormwood with the breaking point facing away from us, so instead we head to the elevator. We ride that up to the third floor of Training Hall A, and take the central warp here, spitting us out in the third floor of Training Hall B on the other side of the building.

Balor: My munificent self wants to hurl again. My ostentatious self hates warp sickness.

Brigid: And you Fomorians wonder why we Tuatha De beat you...

Jeanne d'Arc: Oui, zat is no way for 'eroes storming a nest of 'eretics to behave! Egad! Zat 'uge woman wears no clothing!

Horkos: B-BUONO... IS THAT WHO I THINK IT IS?

Tiamat: Mamamamama... what a delectable treat! Maia Ouroboros and I have been in communication... The time for me to show myself is now! I shall take you, young one, unto my ample bosom...

Nanashi: Not sure if terrified or aroused right now...

Dantalian: Precisely 57% aroused, 43% terrified. We are Dantalian. We know these things.

DRAKE TIAMAT

Character notes: The goddess of the sea in Babylonian lore, she was at once the mother goddess and the primal chaos-monster. She was the wife of Apsu, the primal god of fresh water, and their waters mixing together spawned the main gods. She later fought them, spawning monsters such as the Mushussu, but the gods triumphed over them all. The war god Marduk slew tiamat and, like many chaos-monster myths, made the world from her corpse. Ice and buff specialist, who has the distinction of being one of the few Ice-users resistant to Fire.

Personality notes: Total Stacy's Mom type, constantly going after younger men.

FALLEN DANTALIAN

Character notes: Yet another of the Goetic demon nobles, Dantalian is known for his many heads with faces that change constantly, and his intelligence. He wields a book that contains all knowledge in the world, but only he can read it. He's a very useful support demon who gets Makarakarn, Makakaja, and Majakamaon, which mutes the entire enemy party!

Personality notes: Talks about everything in terms of statistical probabilities.

At around this point Nanashi's team will encounter a group of fellow Hunters. They will explain that they've been searching the temple, but have found not a single sign of the Maitreya Faction Gaeans. They speculate that they committed mass suicide - were voluntarily devoured by Shesha!

Naga: These "Powers" are building up to something big, I can feel it...

We have to bounce between several warps on this level, clearing Wormwood as we go, but eventually we can take the next elevator here down to level 1. Our ultimate goal is the southwest passage here, which sends us straight to the boss room - it's sadly blocked by Wormwood.

Nanashi: Who designs these places!?

Frost Ace: Want me-hee to tell you-ho? I'll warn you, it might send you into an even bigger ex-hee-stential crisis-ho.

Taotie: Well tell him or not - I don't care - just give me FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD! That little pig looks scrumptious!

Katakirauwa: Me not numnums, me need numnums!

VILE TAOTIE

Character notes: A terrifying Chinese creature that looks like a sheep with a twisted human face; it's known as one of the Si Xiong, the four wickedest animals in the world. It's an insatiable glutton that devours everything in its path. One can often find its face on ancient Chinese pots and bronzes. He's a Phys-specialist who... honestly kinda sucks; he's weak to all four elements and has negative skill affinities toward them as well. Meh.

Personality notes: What part of "insatiable glutton" don't you understand?

Fuu-Ki: All things must be in moderation. One must learn the true way of the ninja...

Kin-Ki: Disregard our weedy brother; even he doesn't know what he's saying!

Chernobog: Dahahahaha! So you are the young Comrade who bears much Magnetite, I see. My salutations. The Axis Mundi behaves strangely in these times...

Haoma: Enlist this poisonous one if you must, but remember - keep the air clean!

FURY CHERNOBOG

Character notes: The ancient Russian god of darkness. He's one of the two children of the primordial god, Rod, along with his brother Belobog; their names simply mean "Black God" and "White God." Christian missionaries attempting to convert the Slavs syncretized him with Satan, but it's pretty likely he wasn't truly all that malevolent and was simply seen as a necessary force of the universe. He gets mainly ailment-causing Phys moves, as well as Critical Eye and Sea of Chaos, which inflicts more damage to Lawful demons.

Personality notes: Talks like a stereotypical Russian spy.

TREE HAOMA

Character notes: A Zoroastrian deity representing the religion's most sacred plant, of the same name. The plants were used in ceremonial drug use, but a positive identification of the plant eludes modern scholars. As a god, it's said he was the first-ever priest, and serves the higher deities in this function. His name is cognate with the Hindu Soma, in one of many naming similarities between Persian and Hindu gods that cause scholars to believe that the two pantheons were once one. He's a light and healing specialist who is the first demon with Amrita, which cures all ailments, making him a must-fuse!

Personality notes: Total naturist.

From here we make a hole bunch of elevator and warp trips - take the elevator to the second floor of Training Hall B and go into the north warp. This spits us out in 2F of Training Hall A with another warp right behind us. Take that to go back to Training Hall B again, on the other side of the Wormwood there. Go east, then north to another warp, which ejects us in front of the third and final elevator in Training Hall A. Take that to 1F, take the warp due west of here, which finally gets us to Training Hall B on the other side of the Wormwood. Take the warp there to enter the main hall again, in front of a large, foreboding door, from whence emanate sounds of battle...

Enter to find Flynn, now apparently free and locked in combat with Odin. Both are heavily wounded, but Flynn is able to land a killing blow and the Allfather fades away...

Sleipnir: Neheheheh! NO! I felt I could reason with him!

Sukuna-Hikona: The scales now balance...

Flynn is bleeding and about to keel over, but Isabeau catches him. We don't have time to convalesce, though, as the leader of the Divine Powers himself enters! Krishna is going to serve us some "Salvation," whether we like it or not!

Nanashi: Everyone that died as a result of my fuckup... NOW BE AVENGED!

BOSS: DEITY KRISHNA

Level 60. Resist Light, Weak Dark

I'm not going to lie, Krishna is... actually kind of easy for all he was built up. A weakness to either Light or Dark is a severe disadvantage, and this is on top of his offense not being all that strong - he just has Zandyne and Ziodyne, which should be pretty easily survivable to anyone not weak to them.

That's not to say he can't get annoying, though - his signature moves, Dream Raga and Venomous Raga, respectively drop defense by two and inflict Sleep, Panic, and Charm, and drop attack by two and inflict Poison, Sick, and Bind. That's an awful lot of ailments, obviously, especially as he gets three turns per round... however, you can totally cheese it. Set Hallelujah as your partner, and his Warding Shout will block all the ailments for you.

Nanashi: Frick YEAH! That's the power of teamwork. That ass in my phone can kiss it!

Krishna also supposedly has an Almighty move, Moxagita, which is effectively a re-skinned Megidola that does extra damage to foes with ailments, but I've literally never seen it in any of my runs. It must be something that's triggered by doing something he doesn't like, but I don't know what that is. When beaten, he states that now the city belongs to the demons and angels again, and he'll be "watching from the gallery"...

Nanashi: And don't come back. Rest in peace, everyone that died because of me...

Sarasvati: This might not be what you feel you need to hear, but... do not fault Lord Krishna. Enlightenment for humanity was always the goal of we Devas, and I still feel it is an admirable one - evidently, however, the Great Disaster made Lord Krishna feel as though he had to accelerate his timetable, and do so without humanity's consent. The psychometric analysis of the Gaean artifacts confirms it...

Nanashi: So he was just trying to do what he's always done, just... more aggressively. That fits with what you guys keep saying about being "observed" into roles, I guess...

Unfortunately, we've got company. Two angels, a Dominion and a Throne, enter, intent on claiming Flynn for Merkabah. You have no opportunity to save and are immediately launched into battle... with two guys who have no more HP than a random encounter. Waste them.

Nanashi: I was actually scared for a second there...

We're then ejected into a new passageway where we have to make our escape. As we traverse it, there are several more scripted encounters with demons trying to claim Flynn for either Lucifer or Merkabah - in order, Murmur, Abaddon, and Master Therion and Gemori together.

Zhu Yin: Never underestimate a foe, no matter how weak it may seem!

Nanashi: Wow, he barely fits in the hallway...

DRAGON ZHU YIN

Character notes: Zhuyin or Zhulong is a Chinese sun god, taking the form of a dragon with a human face. He has the body of a crimson serpent and spends his time coiled around the peak of Mt. Zhongshan (Bell Mountain) in northern China. His smallest actions, such as blinking and breathing, are believed to control the weather. He's a pure buff specialist who maxes out with the questionably-useful Silent Prayer.

Personality notes: Old Master.

After clearing out the goon squad, head for the warp in the west passage. This is our ticket out of here but, oh no, what is that I spy? Could it be?

Yes, it's time for everyone's favorite(?) JRPG sequence, WHACK-A-SUPPORTING VILLAIN! You know, the part of every JRPG ever made where the notable-but-not-main villains sort of line up in a nice little row for you to knock down? Think the end of Disc 2 of FFVII for a good example, with you dispatching the Turks, Scarlet and Heidegger, and Hojo in back-to-back boss fights.

Anyway on round 1 of Whack-A-Supporting Villain today, we've got Mii and Kei, who've brought with them a horde of Yuriko Faction Gaeans and Toki to boot, who they order to kill Flynn. And Toki... refuses? She states she's done being a pawn and her loyalty lies... with Nanashi!

Nanashi: EHRMAGERD a totally cute girl wants me and- wait, focus, angry mob right in front of me...

Mii and Kei then order their mob to kill Toki, too.

BOSS: GAEA MAN X3, GAEA WOMAN X2

Gaea Men: Level 62. Null Light

Gaea Women: Level 62. Null Light

We've got five Gaeans to deal with here and they aren't too tough at all. The women typically begin the fight with Taunt, a weird de-buff that buffs your attack while weakening your defense. You can thankfully just Dekunda that away and keep the sweet attack buff! All their attacks are Physical so you can just throw Tetrakarns up and merrily watch as they beat the tar out of themselves.

Dantalian: Statistical probability 99.99999987% of meatheaded Gaeans sealing their own doom..

Mii and Kei take their loss in stride. They eject Toki from the Ring but for now are just glad to have their temple back. And Toki is... glad to be around Nanashi, having experienced a rather inexplicable personality shift causing her to seemingly be in love with him. Asahi, of course, notices this immediately and behind rattling off reasons why she'd be a better match in a pretty funny scene.

Nanashi: Is having two pretty girls after you supposed to be this awkward? I feel like it should be... less so.

Regardless, we exit the temple and... get dropped straight into another fight! Yes, on Round 2 of Whack-A-Supporting Villain, we've got Adramelech, our oldest foe! He's here to claim Flynn for Lucifer - and thankfully, we're now strong enough to paste him!

BOSS: FALLEN ADRAMELECH

Level 65. Drain Fire, Weak Ice, Resist Dark

Adramelech, not Krishna, is inexplicably the final boss of the Divine Powers arc... and is just as inexplicably much, MUCH harder than Krishna. His magic stat is through the roof and he's got many nasty moves to use on you. Among them are Maragion, Eat Whole, the third-tier random-hitting Phys move Madness Nails, and his unique move Hellinsh Brand, which is not only equal to Agidyne, but also removes all buffs from whoever it hits!

Nanashi: I... understand now. I understand... why I died.

Fire users are often difficult to fight because Ice-users, their typical weakness, are also weak to Fire, and the reverse applies as well. Thankfully we've got Tiamat, an Ice-user who nulls Fire!

Tiamat: Stay safe, child. Nestle yourself within my motherly body!

Incubus: Is there such thing as a single entendre?

You cal also cheese him with Makarakarn, too. Do note that if you lose here you have to fight the Gaeans again, because of course you do, this is SMT! Eventually, however, he will fall.

Asahi wishes Nikkari and Manabu rest in peace, and we get showered in experience for a job very, very well done.

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