If you’ve seen this movie before, then you probably remember what the next scene is. You remember it because it won’t let you forget. If you have no idea what comes next, then I have two things to say. First, that I envy you. Second, that you’re in for quite a treat.
Where does our next scene open? Back at the castle, in the dead of night, with light in only a single window. Yes, the Queen is still in this movie. “Magic mirror on the wall, now who is the fairest one of all?” she asks the mirror, holding the heart box and sporting some wicked eyebrows.
Alas, the mirror is no longer interested in feeding her crap about how hot she supposedly is. “Over the seven jeweled hills, beyond the seventh fall, in the cottage of the seven dwarfs dwells Snow White, fairest of them all.” The queen tries showing him the heart, but he informs her that it’s only the heart of a pig. And the queen, it seems, really has a thing against pigs.
"The heart of a pig? Then I’ve been tricked!” she exclaims. Sweeping her cape in a suitably evil fashion, she stalks off down into her dungeon/part-time mad science lab. If you want something done right, you gotta do it yourself. But to get into the dwarfs’ cottage, she’ll need a disguise. Little old ladies are harmless, right?
She gets the ingredients for the disguise potion together: mummy dust to make her old, the black of night to shroud her clothes, an old hag’s cackle to age her voice, a scream of fright to whiten her hair, a blast of wind to fan her hate, a thunderbolt to mix it well, a clump of peyote to terrify the audience, a slab of ham to…honestly, she’s doing pretty well with the ham already. But I digress.
The potion’s all nice and green when it’s done. “Now…begin thy magic spell,” she says as she drinks it up. And lordy, does it do so. She starts to choke, the room starts spinning and suddenly there’s rainbow bubbles everywhere. Her hair turns white, and her hands stretch out until they’re all long and wrinkled and LOOK AT THE BONES! Sorry, I had to lighten the mood somehow.
When the transformation ends, she’s hunched over and dressed in a black cloak. “A perfect disguise!” she cackles in her new voice as she reveals her new face, which makes even her raven freak out. She then goes about preparing a special death for her rival. A poisoned apple oughta do the trick! “One taste of the poisoned apple,” she reads aloud from her book, “and the victim’s eyes will close forever in the sleeping death.” She looks up and — no, not right at the camera! GEEZ, lady! It’s still the first movie! You aren’t supposed to know the audience exists until Aladdin!
…And speaking of future Disney movies, did you think the transition after Bambi’s mom died was a bit harsh? Well, the tradition didn’t start there! Off we fly to the dwarfs’ cottage, where things have taken a turn for the worse! Yes, the dwarfs have grown tired of Snow White and are sacrificing her to some dwarf god whom they communicate with in bizarre ululations and…wait, they’re just yodeling. Easy mistake.
Our next number is “The Silly Song,” which is exactly what it sounds like. One dwarf steps up and sings a little nonsense verse, and the rest of the group sings about how silly and dumb the song is. Grumpy and Dopey play an organ and makeshift drum set, respectively. Snow chimes in with a note that really ought to have shattered every window in the cottage. A fly trolls Dopey. Doc helps Snow up from her chair, and we get the iconic image of Snow dancing with the dwarfs.
If the animation for Snow seems a little odd compared to that of the dwarfs, it’s because she and the other human characters were rotoscoped. I think this dancing scene is where it’s most obvious. And it’s pretty much the only worthwhile thing to come out of this song. I would much rather see more of Snow actually interacting with the dwarfs and befriending them, but we seem to have skipped over all that. Not only does this song serve no real purpose, but it happily admits this fact. Sneezy gets an eruption worked up, blasts Dopey into the rafters and the whole thing finally comes to an end.
"Now you do something!" Happy tells Snow.
"Well, what shall I do?"
"Tell us a story!" they say. A true love story, to be exact.
"Well, once there was a princess," Snow begins as the dwarfs gather around her.
"Was the princess you?"
"And she fell in love."
"Was it hard to do?"
Uh oh. They’re rhyming. This isn’t going anywhere non-musical.
"Did he say he loved ya?"
"Did he steal a kiss?"
"He was so romantic, I could not resist…"
"Someday My Prince Will Come" is either the most famous or second most famous song from this movie. Probably the former. The teeny-boppers loved to cover it on Disneymania, but did you know that it became a jazz standard? Miles Davis even did a version! It’s been sung by all kinds of people in all kinds of styles. So what is it about this song that’s made so many people love it?
The opening is a little bouncy, but it quickly calms down into a leisurely sway once the vocals start up. The lyrics are nice and innocent; Snow is sure that all her dreams are going to come true someday, and she’s going to be patient until they do. A quaint notion today, but appropriate for the 30s. It’s about hope, a little like “Over The Rainbow” in that regard. The only thing I could really criticize is Adriana Caselotti’s singing voice, but even that sounds fine on this track once you hear it a few times (although it is pretty funny when they have her high note wake up Sneezy).
The lone holdout is of course, Grumpy. He’s tucked away in a corner, muttering about this is all mush. Normally this would be a funny moment, but it’s actually a bit sad this time around. The rest of the dwarfs sigh happily when the song ends, and so have many people since.
The cuckoo clock shatters this beautiful moment, as cuckoo clocks are so prone to doing. Snow tells the dwarfs to go upstairs and get some sleep, but they insist that she use their beds. They’ll be quite comfortable downstairs, or so they say. It’s no surprise when they start mauling each other over the only pillow as soon as she closes the door.
Meanwhile, another heartwarming moment comes right on the heels of the last one. Snow is kneeling by the beds and praying. “Bless the seven little men who have been so kind to me, and make all my dreams come true. Amen. Oh, and please make Grumpy like me!”
Grumpy, who is downstairs trying to sleep in the kitchen pot, isn’t too impressed by this. The other dwarfs are already sound asleep, though; they’ve found some passable (if unconventional) beds, all because they care for Snow that much. The sound of chirping crickets carries us back outside as we fade to black.
…I’m usually not one for gushing, but AWWWW. :)
