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Chapter 37: Dennis the Menace
Final final battle!
Anthony vs. DennisDennis: "This shall be our final battle!" "It's our FIRST battle!" Dennis: "So? It's our first and last!" He led with a nasty-looking Cofagrigus, while I led with Mamoswine. Mamoswine used Earthquake. Dennis: "I was expecting exactly that kind of move!" Cofagrigus used Toxic, poisoning Mamoswine. I casually used an Antidote on him while Cofagrigus wasted a turn using Protect. I eventually goaded Dennis into wasting a Full Restore on Cofagrigus, and defeated it with little damage to Mamoswine. Dennis: "Fine then! I'm bringing out the big guns now!" He sent out Hydreigon. Dennis: "Three heads of pure destruction and malice! Like me!" "You only have one head." Dennis: "THAT'S WHAT YOU THINK!" Mamoswine got the first strike with Ice Shard, and dodged Hydreigon's Fire Blast. I struck with Ice Shard again, and Mamoswine dodged Fire Blast yet again. Dennis: "That isn't fair!" "Should have gone with Flamethrower!" Mamoswine struck with Ice Shard again, and Hydreigon missed with Focus Blast. Dennis: "HYDREIGON, ARE YOU BLIND?!" Mamoswine finished it off. Dennis: "WHAT?! My precious Hydreigon!! That's it! Get her, Seismitoad! Use-" Seismitoad was defeated by a single Leaf Storm. "This is kinda easy." Dennis: "Oh, yeah?!" He sent out a Bisharp. Dennis: "I'm totally original with this one! It's not like one of the Elite Four used a Bisharp as his strongest Pokemon!" Lucario took out the Bisharp in one hit with a Force Palm. Dennis: "Stop that! Let me use my Pokemon!!" He sent out Bouffalant, while I sent out Honchkrow. Honchkrow successfully paralyzed the Bouffalant but fell to a Head Charge. Dennis: "Ha HA!" "It's still five on two." All of a sudden the Shadow Triad began chanting. Shadow Triad: "Deeeeennissss. Deeeeennissss." "So that's why they're here! To chant your name." Dennis twitched and looked at the Shadow Triad, who continued. I sent Exeggutor back out, who took Bouffalant out with Leaf Storm. Dennis: "That's it! time for my final Pokemon! And it has no weak!" He sent out an Eelektross. I sent out Typhlosion. They fought, and Eelektross defeated Typhlosion, but not without taking damage. I sent out Omastar. Dennis: "Hahaha! Look, she thinks Water types can fight Electric types!" Eelektross used Wild Charge on Omastar, dealing calamitous damage but not defeating it. Dennis: "So! What are you gonna do now, foolish idiot?"
"Omastar, use Surf." Omastar created a massive wave, washing Eelektross against the wall and soaking Dennis. Eelektross attempted to stand back up, but collapsed and the glowing marks on its body ceased to glow. Dennis: "My plans! Trashed! My calculations! For naught! My awesome cobalt crown! Didn't even start production!" "Too bad!" Dennis: "Nonono! I wanted to win! Waaaah! Waaaah! Let me win!" Alder: "No." Dennis: "But I'm perfect!! I made Team Plasmoron! I am the perfect ruler of a perfect new world! Because I'm perfect!" Alder: "So N, how are you?" Dennis: "HEY! I'M STILL RELEVANT HERE! TALK TO MEEEEE!" "Shut up, Dennis." Dennis: "NOOOOOOOO! MY NAME'S! NOT! DENNIS!!!!!!!" Cheren: "Come on, Alder, let's take Dennis away to the authorities." They grabbed Dennis's arms and dragged him away, him throwing a fit the entire way. N: "Anthony. Can we talk?" "Sure." N: "Remember back in Accumula, when Cheren told me I talk too quickly?" "Yes?" N: "Back then, your Pokemon said it liked you. I thought it was kinda creepy. But now I see... uh... something. I don't know what. This whole story has been sorta lost on me." "Oh." N: "So... I guess that's it. Maybe I'll see you again another time." He sent out Zekrom and climbed on its back. N: "Away, Zappy, away!" He took off through the Zekrom-shaped hole in the wall, soaring off into the distance. "And so that settles that." I walked away, toward the exit of the castle. Suddenly I became aware of a discomfort I had forgotten about. "Huh, forgot I still had these." I pulled Cheren's glasses out and put them in my pocket. I then resumed my walk. "I really need to stop talking to myself, exposition be darned."
And the moral of the story is... is... is... Fuck, I forgot.
Nice. Like the way you turned Clyde's comment into sort of a Chekhov's Gun/Brick Joke.
I see the RNG worked in your favor for once Anom.
The lesson is, H 2 O is H-too-awesome!
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