Anom's Super Mega Egg Run

Anomalocaris 20

Chapter 37: Dennis the Menace

Dennis stomped his foot on the ground, and N glanced away in shame.

Dennis: "Son I am disappoint."

N: "Aww, but dad..."

Dennis: "Shut up! You stupid ignorant foolish moronic unintelligent idiot!"

"Hey, that isn't very-"

Dennis: "Nice?! I'll tell you what isn't nice! It took me 19 years to make this N! It was supposed to do what I told it and use the legendary Pokemon under MY command! But nooo, you lost to the Moop, didn't you!?"

N: "Aww, but-"

Dennis: "No buts, mister! You are grounded!"

N: "Oh?"

Dennis: "Into hamburger meat!"

N: "Oh..."

Dennis: "I want a full refund! I want it I want it I want it Mommy I want it!"

"Throwing a temper tantrum isn't going to help, Dennis."

He growled at this, before resuming his insult-N parade.

Dennis: "Anyway, son, I forgive you. After all, I love you still. Aaah! Wrong! As if! LOOK BOY!"

N turned to face him.

Dennis: "Now you have two options here. You leave, and we pretend this whole thing never happened, or I kill you here because you're ugly and I hate you. Which do you want?"

N: "The... first one?"

Dennis: "Ha! Trick question! You never had that choice! Ha ha!"

N sat on the ground and moped.

Dennis: "And you!"


Dennis: "I should have dealt with you earlier! Now you know too much, so you have to die!"

"Can't we talk this out?"

Dennis: "No! I don't talk things out with Moops!"

Alder and Cheren entered.

Cheren: "Wait, Dennis was a villain the entire time?! Say it ain't so!!"

Dennis: "Yes! I was secretly evil! And now only I will command Pokemon!"

Alder: "You fool! That's a ridiculous idea!"

Dennis: "Is it? IS IT, ALDER?!"

Alder: "Uh, yeah. It is."

Dennis: "Oh. Well, who cares what you think?!"

"I do."

Dennis: "Shut up. This is MY show!"

N: "Anthony!"

He healed my Pokemon.

Dennis: "Hey! No fair! I wanted to fight him with his weakened team! Nonono!"

"So we ARE fighting, then?"

Dennis: "Of course! Chorus, get in here!"

The Shadow Triad darted in and stood at the sides of the arena.

Final final battle!

Anthony vs. Dennis

Dennis: "This shall be our final battle!"

"It's our FIRST battle!"

Dennis: "So? It's our first and last!"

He led with a nasty-looking Cofagrigus, while I led with Mamoswine. Mamoswine used Earthquake.

Dennis: "I was expecting exactly that kind of move!"

Cofagrigus used Toxic, poisoning Mamoswine. I casually used an Antidote on him while Cofagrigus wasted a turn using Protect. I eventually goaded Dennis into wasting a Full Restore on Cofagrigus, and defeated it with little damage to Mamoswine.

Dennis: "Fine then! I'm bringing out the big guns now!"

He sent out Hydreigon.

Dennis: "Three heads of pure destruction and malice! Like me!"

"You only have one head."


Mamoswine got the first strike with Ice Shard, and dodged Hydreigon's Fire Blast. I struck with Ice Shard again, and Mamoswine dodged Fire Blast yet again.

Dennis: "That isn't fair!"

"Should have gone with Flamethrower!"

Mamoswine struck with Ice Shard again, and Hydreigon missed with Focus Blast.


Mamoswine finished it off.

Dennis: "WHAT?! My precious Hydreigon!! That's it! Get her, Seismitoad! Use-"

Seismitoad was defeated by a single Leaf Storm.

"This is kinda easy."

Dennis: "Oh, yeah?!"

He sent out a Bisharp.

Dennis: "I'm totally original with this one! It's not like one of the Elite Four used a Bisharp as his strongest Pokemon!"

Lucario took out the Bisharp in one hit with a Force Palm.

Dennis: "Stop that! Let me use my Pokemon!!"

He sent out Bouffalant, while I sent out Honchkrow. Honchkrow successfully paralyzed the Bouffalant but fell to a Head Charge.

Dennis: "Ha HA!"

"It's still five on two."

All of a sudden the Shadow Triad began chanting.

Shadow Triad: "Deeeeennissss. Deeeeennissss."

"So that's why they're here! To chant your name."

Dennis twitched and looked at the Shadow Triad, who continued.

I sent Exeggutor back out, who took Bouffalant out with Leaf Storm.

Dennis: "That's it! time for my final Pokemon! And it has no weak!"

He sent out an Eelektross. I sent out Typhlosion. They fought, and Eelektross defeated Typhlosion, but not without taking damage.

I sent out Omastar.

Dennis: "Hahaha! Look, she thinks Water types can fight Electric types!"

Eelektross used Wild Charge on Omastar, dealing calamitous damage but not defeating it.

Dennis: "So! What are you gonna do now, foolish idiot?"

Opelucid City Gym, after I had defeated Drayden

Clyde: "So that's it, then! Go on to the Pokemon League, and remember, Anthony: Always, always trust in the power of water!"

"Omastar, use Surf."

Omastar created a massive wave, washing Eelektross against the wall and soaking Dennis. Eelektross attempted to stand back up, but collapsed and the glowing marks on its body ceased to glow.

Dennis: "My plans! Trashed! My calculations! For naught! My awesome cobalt crown! Didn't even start production!"

"Too bad!"

Dennis: "Nonono! I wanted to win! Waaaah! Waaaah! Let me win!"

Alder: "No."

Dennis: "But I'm perfect!! I made Team Plasmoron! I am the perfect ruler of a perfect new world! Because I'm perfect!"

Alder: "So N, how are you?"


"Shut up, Dennis."


Cheren: "Come on, Alder, let's take Dennis away to the authorities."

They grabbed Dennis's arms and dragged him away, him throwing a fit the entire way.

N: "Anthony. Can we talk?"


N: "Remember back in Accumula, when Cheren told me I talk too quickly?"


N: "Back then, your Pokemon said it liked you. I thought it was kinda creepy. But now I see... uh... something. I don't know what. This whole story has been sorta lost on me."


N: "So... I guess that's it. Maybe I'll see you again another time."

He sent out Zekrom and climbed on its back.

N: "Away, Zappy, away!"

He took off through the Zekrom-shaped hole in the wall, soaring off into the distance.

"And so that settles that."

I walked away, toward the exit of the castle. Suddenly I became aware of a discomfort I had forgotten about.

"Huh, forgot I still had these."

I pulled Cheren's glasses out and put them in my pocket. I then resumed my walk.

"I really need to stop talking to myself, exposition be darned."


And the moral of the story is...



Fuck, I forgot.
PippingFool 12th Jul 12
Nice. Like the way you turned Clyde's comment into sort of a Chekhov's Gun/Brick Joke.
DarkerShining 12th Jul 12
I see the RNG worked in your favor for once Anom.
rmctagg09 12th Jul 12
The lesson is, H 2 O is H-too-awesome!
Tangent128 12th Jul 12