Anom's Super Mega Egg Run

Anomalocaris 20

Chapter 19: The Champion of Unova

"Now, no battling for a while for you!"

Lucario seemed upset. Regardless, it was time to head on to the next place. I went east of Nimbasa.

Route 16

"Huh. Did I go the wrong way?"

Police Officer: "Grack! You not pass!"

I defeated his Pokemon.

Police Officer: "Grack! Pretty lady come this way to laugh at Officer Daniel?"


I went past the bizarre officer, and was rammed into by a cyclist.


One Pokemon battle and one mangled bicycle later, I continued on my way.

"Exeggcute, use Strength!!"

Exeggcute looked at the boulder, then back at me, then back at the boulder, as if to ask if I had gone insane. Nevertheless, it found itself pushing the boulder into the pit.

Boulder: "Ow! What did I do to deserve being trapped in this square hole?!"

"Sorry... You were in the way..."

Boulder: "Now I'll be trapped here for the rest of my life! Which is infinite!"

"...Weren't you trapped just outside the hole anyway?"

Boulder: "So?"

The path north of the boulder was grassy. In it, I fought a Trubbish and a Gothita at the same time. Murkrow randomly pickpocketed the Trubbish and found a Black Sludge.

-Murkrow is hurt by its Black Sludge!-

"Stop trying to eat that stuff!"

I put the Black Sludge in my bag. I then realized how gross that is, but mysteriously it was somehow being safely contained inside the bag, without seeping or getting all over everything.


In the grass I found a Payback, then exited the grassy area. Unfortunately, my journey down the rest of Route 16 was cut short; some workers were blocking the path to Marvelous Bridge.

Returning to Nimbasa, I went west this time. Only to be stopped by Cheren.


Cheren: "I've got you this time!"

Anthony vs. Cheren

His Pokemon were, to be fair, stronger. But I'm too lazy to transcribe the battle, so...


Cheren: "Why? Why can't I destroy you!?"

Elesa: "LMAO. |-|3 T0T4LLY 0WN3D U! F0LL0W M3."

We followed her, and felt an imposing aura nearby. It was strong enough to make my knees shake.

???: "Oh! Why, if it isn't Elesa! Aren't festivals grand? Life should be enjoyed!"

Elesa: "(|-|4MP10N Alder, D353 4R3 T3H N00B13 TR41N3R5."

Cheren was compelled to begin bowing before the paragon of awesomeness that stood before us.

Alder: "My name is Alder. I'm the Unova Pokemon League's Champion. Pleased to make your acquaintance.

Cheren: "I-"

Alder: "You wish to become Champion, no? What, then, would you do after reaching that?"

Cheren: "Uh..."

Alder: "I think it's in your best interest to beat up those two preschoolers and take their money.

Author's Note: Hey, I didn't strike that out...

Alder: "I think it's in your best interest to murder the preschoolers and mug their corpses.

Author's Note: Again?

Alder: "I think it's in your best interest to have a peaceful battle with those young trainers.

Author's Note: Alder, stop! Let me make fun of you here!!

Alder: "I cannot allow that, young sir."

Author's Note: Get out of my side of the fourth wall!

Alder: "This battle will have no losers, only four smiling winners."

Cheren and I fought on a team, and took down the preschoolers' Herdier duo. They were surprisingly powerful. We won out in the end, though, no thanks to Cheren.

Alder: "Nicely done! You didn't win, but that was a terrible battle! For that, you shall die!! good battle. Your Pokemon looked like they were suffering. having fun.

Alder's aura of power and awesomeness then allowed him to fly away into the sky. I met up with Elesa and Cheren at the end of the route, at a bridge.

Elesa: "|-|0LD 0N, N33D 2 C0NT4(T 50M30N3."

She whipped out a small portable computer and typed out a message to someone. Her fingers were very, very fast due to years of practice.

Elesa: "T|-|3R3 W3 60. (|-|3(K T|-|15 0UT!"

The drawbridge lowered into place, spanning across the body of water nicely.

Elesa: "GTG N40. 600D LU(K, N00B5!"

She walked away. Cheren and I crossed the bridge.

Driftveil Drawbridge

"Please stop following me, you creep me out."

Cheren: "We're going to the same place, and I need a guide since I can't see so well anyway."

As we approached the end of the bridge, Cheren stumbled.

Cheren: "Whoa, is the ground shaking or is it just me?"

I felt it too, and sure enough eyed a small pebble bouncing somewhat. The tremors had an odd rhythm to them.

Cheren: "AUGH! WHAT IS THAT!!?"

Approaching us was an utterly large behemoth of an object, slowly plodding toward the bridge. It was gigantic, a large, round brownish object slightly wider than the bridge. It then spoke.

???: "Well, I reckon you two're the ones 'Lesa was talkin' 'bout. I'm Clay. I'm the Gym Leader 'round these parts."

"Uh... So you are the round Gym Leader- I mean you are the Gym Leader of this place, then?"

The bridge creaked unsettlingly beneath us.

Clay: "Yep, sure am. But thanks to yer entry, the Plasidjits we'd caught done escaped in all the ruckus!"

Cheren: "They were able to get past you? I mean, uh, we'll look for them, Clay."

Clay: "Well, slap me and call me a Tauros steak! You'll git it done, then?"

"Yeah. We can't have them wandering here..."

Clay: "You two go'n do that, and I'll gladly let yeh fight me for the badge. Now, I'm gonna go check the diner out for a while."

He walked away, the earth shaking with each step. The bridge finally gave out after he stepped off of it, and Cheren and I were forced to swim to shore.


BadWolf21 9th May 12
Glad to see someone else finds Alder absolutely awesome.
Saiga 9th May 12
Don't make fun of Clay! It's a glandular problem!
EviIPaladin 10th May 12
Hehe, nice one! Alder - 1 Fourth Wall - 0
DarkerShining 12th May 12