Chapter 3: The Mysterious N-igmaRoute 1
Juniper's Minccino roared as it tore the wild Patrat's head off with its teeth.
"And that is how you MURDER
wild Pope Imams."
"That was awesome, Juniper!
"YOU ALL HAVE BALLS.
Juniper handed each of us 5 Pokeballs.
"I had the most original idea ever! We'll have a contest..."
"...to see who can catch the most Pokemon!"
"Oh. That's not very ori-"
"YOU'RE ON. BRING IT, GIRLS. I WILL CATCH EVERY POKEMON IN UNOVA!"
"I'm not supposed to be a girl, y'know...
And could you two stop always interr-"
Bianca and Cheren:
They ran off.
I stepped into the tall grass and was accosted by a Lillipup. I didn't bother to weaken it, and caught it.
"WILD POKEMON ARE IN THE TALL GRASS."
I proceeded to defeat a second Lillipup, and Tepig learned Ember.
"WE ALL HAVE THE SAME NUMBER OF POKEMON."
I walked back to catch a Patrat, so that I wouldn't have to deal with their praise of me having more Pokemon than them. We then entered Accumula Town, and Juniper showed us a Pokemon Center which was boring.
Suddenly, PLASMORONS IN THE PLAZA.
"My name is Ghetsis."
"Huh? Did he say Dennis?"
"Yeah, I think he did."
"Shush, trying to listen to Dennis talk."
"I am here representing Team Plasmoron
. Today, ladies, gentlemen, and gender-ambiguous individuals, I would like to talk to you about Pokemon liberation. It's simple. You're all selfish idiots who need to release your enslaved Pokemon now, because you're all scum."
"Wow, he's a good speaker!"
"I feel envigored by his rousing speech!"
"He's so sweet and nice!"
The crowd cleared, and another individual with green hair, but not Dennis, approached me.
"Your Pokemon are saying-"
"...Okay, then. My name is N."
"Wow, what a loser. Who names their child with only one letter?"
Anthony vs. N
N sent out a Purrloin to scratch my Lillipup to death, but Lillipup put up a good fight and defeated the Purrloin. And that was it.
"I must free Pokemon from Pokeballs."
"Didn't you just send that Purrloin out from one?"
"What a loser. I'ma go fight Gym Leader."
Finally alone, I healed my Pokemon then strolled around Accumula with a feminine
strut. Deciding there was nothing else to do there except talk to old people
and listen to music, I moved on.
My Xtransciever rang.
She threw a pair of shoes through the screen and at my face before hanging up.
-Anthony obtained the Running Shoes!-
Now capable of breaking Pokeworld physics by running, I ran out of control and smacked into a large boulder.
"You shall not pass!"
The Youngster's Patrat was destroyed.
He jumped off a small ledge.
"It's like MAGIC."
I decided that everyone here was insane. Unfortunately the Lass up ahead didn't think so and sicced a Purrloin on me.
"...Is that N's?"
Tepig destroyed everything in its path. I sure hope I don't somehow lose Tepig and be forced to use 6 Pokemon hatched from eggs or something like that.
Anthony vs. Bianca
Tepig burned everyone and everything.
"You're a tough cookie, Anthony! Us girls
have to stick together, you know!"
"I'm not going to bother..."
I left her behind and walked into Striaton City, home of the first Gym...
Dennis is a pretty good speaker. That's the most persuasive argument I've ever heard.