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Live Blogs Let's Play FFIV: The After Years
SomeColorMage2012-01-03 14:32:03

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Ctrl-F, "Battle of Fabul", Ctrl-C, Ctrl-V

Well, it's time we headed back to Fabul. Maybe we can outrun the Red Wings, considering how slow NPCs fly in this. We reach Fabul and head up to the throne room.

Chancellor: Your Highness! You have returned!

Yang: The Red Wings are flying this way as we speak!

Duke Consort: So the rumors about Baron were true all along... What shall we do Yang? They are surely after our Crystal.

Yang: ...

Ursula: The Wind Crystal symbolizes everything Fabul stands for! Handing it over to them is the same as abandoning this kingdom's honor!

List of things Fabul stands for: Punching, punching and more punching.

List of things the Wind Crystal stands for: Um... air?

Duke Consort: But Ursula, if we were to fall into a prolonged battle, I fear there would be untold bloodshed.

Ursula: But still...!

Yang: Something has happened to Cecil. Of that much I am certain. Until we know the truth behind it, the Crystal must not be surrendered.

Duke Consort: You wish us to fight back, then?

Yang: No. I shall greet them at the gates and guage matters accordingly.

Ursula: I'm going with you!

Yang: You will not.

Ursula: Why not!?

Yang: If disaster befalls me, the kingdom will be yours to protect. Your mother needs you... and so do our people.

Ursula: Father...

Yang: Gather all the monks! We must ready our defenses at once!

We head outside.

Monk: Here they come!

Yang: Hold your attack. We will observe their next move.

The soldiers arrive.

Yang: Welcome to Fabul. How is King Cecil?

They approach us. This isn't exactly working out.

Yang: !!!

We get into a fight with a Captain and two Baron Marines. This formation seems familiar...

Monk: Incoming cannon fire! It's coming from the Red Wings!

Explosions happen.

Monk: Master Yang! Our defences will not hold!

Yang: Retreat into the castle!

And so we do.

Yang: (So it begins anew...)

Here comes the next fight, against... a Sahagin, a Leshy and a Domovoi?

Wait a sec, this is the exact same formations as in the sequence in Fabul in FFIV! I mean, what the hell! This is not how you do a reference to another work. Instead of making a sequence reminiscent of the battle in FFIV, the developers have managed to make AN EXACT COPY! The original FFIV is 20 years old, couldn't you guys make something a little better!?

I will be Facepalming for the rest of this update, I assure, you.

Anyway, we win easily, monsters kill the guards, monsters surround us.

Yang: Fall back!

Upstairs we go.

Monk: Our backs will soon be up against the throne room!

Yang: Fear not! Sheila has been safely evacuated!

We get into another fight, then the monsters surround us. Again.

Monk: Master Yang!

Yang: Haaah!

We back into the throne. Sheila and Ursula are still here.

Yang: You! Why are you still here!?

Ursula: To fight alongside you!

The next fight begins, although Ursula doesn't join us for it.

Yang: To the Crystal Chamber now! Both of you!

Sheila: What about you!?

Yang: I will stay here... They must be stopped!

Ursula: Father!

Yang: Go!!!

Sheila: Ursula!

The two retreat, and we start another battle. All of these fights have been effortless.

???: Sorry I've been scarce lately.

Yang: You...!

We cut to the Crystal Chamber. The door opens.

Sheila: Honey!

It's not Yang who enters. Considering how much has been blatantly stolen from FFIV in this update, we should know who just entered the room.

Sheila: Kain!

Ursula: What...?

Sheila: Are you here to lend us a hand, then?

Kain: Indeed. I am here to help... Help myself to the Wind Crystal, that is!

That was horrible. I'd facepalm again, but I need a hand free so I can actually play through this travesty.

Ursula: Mother, get back!

We start a fight with Kain, but aren't getting to far. Yang then Kicks his way into the fight.

Ursula: Father!

Yang: Stay focused, Ursula!

This fight's easy enough. We have Yang set up Cover Counter on Ursula, which will protect her unless Kain Jumps. After that, we just need to heal a bit, then it's not much of a problem.

Kain: Impressive. Your are undoubtedly your father's daughter, girl.

(sic)

Kain: But no matter!

He jumps over us.

Yang: No!

He then takes the Crystal.

Yang: Kain... How could you...!?

Kain: Lest you be confused, allow me to assure you that this is not a repeat of the past. I am acting on my own volition - my own free will!

He leaves.

Yang: Ugh...!

Cut to later, in the throne room.

Duke Consort: In the end, we couldn't stop the Wind Crystal from being taken to Baron.

Yang: Forgive me. It was because of my weakness...

Chancellor: The flames of past wars flicker anew.

Ursula: This isn't over! We haven't lost this battle yet! Not by a long shot!

Yang: Ursula...

Ursula: We can take back the Crystal!

Flashback to the event that this game has shamelessly copied, just after Golbez kidnapped Rosa. Understandably, Cecil, Yang and Edward were pretty upset.

Rydia: What's wrong with you? They took Rosa, but they didn't hurt her. We just need to rescue her! And the Crystal - we can take it back, too!

Rydia, however, doesn't give a damn how upset anyone is. Back to the present.

Yang: Yes... you're right!

Ursula: Father...!

He starts to leave.

Yang: Take care of the castle for me.

Sheila: Where are you going, hon?

Yang: To Baron.

Chancellor: Wh-what!? That would be suicide!

Yang: I must see Cecil about this!

Ursula: I'm coming, too.

Yang: You're staying here.

Can we please not have this argument again?

Ursula: This isn't just Fabul's problem. he entire world is under attack!

Yang: !

Sheila: Please be careful, Ursula.

Yang: Sheila!

Ursula: I'm prepared for whatever happens!

Yang: My duke... please forgive the selfish deeds of your monarch.

Duke Consort. Quite all right. I'm not too old to serve my kingdom yet.

Sheila: The two of us'll keep everything running while you're gone.

Yang: Thank you.

I think I've had quite enough of this. See you next time.

Stats are unchanged since last update.

Comments

EndarkCuli Since: Dec, 1969
Jan 3rd 2012 at 11:36:50 PM
"This is not a repeat of the past," says Kain. Aside from the parts where Baron knights invade the kingdom for its crystal, Yang & his allies fight back in roughly four battles, and a dragoon acts like a real [CENSORED]. I'd go on, but since the main joke of this update was how heavily it 'borrowed' from the original title, it just wouldn't feel right.
SomeColorMage Since: Dec, 1969
Jan 4th 2012 at 2:06:14 AM
I'm pretty sure if I knew the writer of that line, I would slap them. This is probably the worst part of the game until we reach endgame, and considering some parts that are still to come, that's a big claim.
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