Let's die in Dark Souls
Upon begining play, my brother urged me to remove my clothes, which I thought was weird, but whatever. Turns out my character is a dessicated skeleton man, so I guess I'm in the right place. Oddly enough my hair looks perfect despite growing out of a bloody skull.
I am carrying a broken sword, which apparently the guards don't see any reason to take away from me. That would be mean. A mysterious sign on the floor read's GOOD LUCK. Good luck going insane from being stuck in prison for eternity I guess. Like all great silent heroes, I start with a mysterious pendant. The pendant's description reads: "This faintly warm medal, engraved with the symbol of the Sun, is the ultimate honor, awarded to shoe who summon the Warrior of Sunlight and complete a goal." "shoe who summon?" Wha? "A goal?" What goal, game? I think we may have some translation issues. Just goes to shoe that Atlus cares as much about this game's storyline as I do.
I loot the body recently dropped in and find... the cell key? They threw a dead body in here that held the key to leave my prison? This is probably the worst run prison of all time.
After murdering a fellow inmate because the tuturial told me to, I make it outside, light a bonfire, which despite it's name is not actually comprised of fire, and are warned again by my old friend Floor that there is an enemy ahead. Time for my first real battle. Which turns out to be a giant invincible blob monster. Oh well, I leave him to do his thing and run down a side passage.
After following the directions of a lot of poorly worded messages from Floor, I end up with a cracked shield and a small axe and murder another inmate, who for some reason was shooting arrows at me. I then come across a staircase with about five steps missing and an Item clearly glowing on top. Floor advises me NEED KEY! Um, no, game all I have to do is just boost myself up. Come on it's only like three feet. Sigh.
Ouch, giant boulder rolled down on me.