So You Wanna Do a Cinematech: Nocturnal Emissions Liveblog

Beary Scary

What the Hell-da

Episode 43

Timecode: 0:22: A Cinematech salute to boobs in video games. They included a decently catchy song to boot. Games featured included God of War, Ninja Gaiden, Rumble Roses, Namco X Capcom, and BloodRayne. It ended with a Fan Disservice shot of the titular fat man from Tongue of the Fat Man massaging his massive man mammaries. Augh!

19:49: A montage of madness from Panic. This was a Sega CD game where a boy was all that stood between the world and an uprising of machines gone mad. Armed with a trusty remote control, he had to put a stop to them by... pressing random buttons and hopefully not suffering an embarrassing fate. Such as being stranded in a snowing field where it suddenly starts raining swirly poop (that make farting sounds when they land) or being chased by an electric razor in a Pac-Man maze that also has a random Expy of Chun-Li. Perhaps it was supposed to be a screen with a video game theme?

20:24: A melancholy short film made by Ryan St. Evans with the Animaction program for the Vectrex system. It shows the word “Fine” next to a candle, a man in a hockey mask, glowing hands with eyes on them, a blocky figure walking forward, and a crying man. Possibly disturbing, definitely moody with the piano solo played over it.

Episode 44 General

Episode 44 was pretty boring and forgettable, but at least it had some of those infamous animated scenes from The Legend of Zelda CD-i Games. At the time, I had no idea that they would undergo such Memetic Mutation; of course, I had no idea what a "meme" was back then. I thought they were just "gaiden" games with odd animation and hokey voice acting.

As it turns out that the story of the games' development is pretty interesting, especially in regards to the notorious animated scenes. They were required for the games because Phillips wanted the developers to demonstrate the CDi's capabilities with full-motion video scenes. The animation was actually done by four Russian animators that had no experience with digital animation prior to these projects.

The Zelda CDI games were way ahead of Metroid: Other M in making fans take back their wishes for more voice acting in Nintendo games. What I find most galling is Link becoming an Extreme Omnivore: “I'm so hungry, I could eat an Octorok!” There's also the part where Impa, Princess Zelda's lovable, dumpy handmaiden, goes to comfort the princess over her father's absence and Impa's hand is bigger than Zelda's head!

The Zelda games in particular were criticized, but some insist the games really weren't as bad as their reputations indicate, even praising the games' soundtracks.

For something similarly campy from the same animation studio, please do check out Mutant Rampage Body Slam.