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New Recruits Tend To Drown A Lot

Ranger Six
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Combat Report, August 24, 2040 - Part I: Surface Garrison

Personnel deployed:

  • Commander Kwas
  • Lieutenant Myst Rose
  • Lieutenant Princeps Augustus
  • Ensign x2wolf
  • Ensign dmboogie
  • Ensign Jacques Cousteau
  • Ensign Guido Talbot
  • Ensign Siegfried Farnan
  • Able Seaman Arilou
  • Able Seaman Parson Gotti
  • Able Seaman Sophie Aldred
  • Able Seaman Virgil Griffiths

Yana (via remote link): Okay, people, the mission's the same as before: get in, blow the command center, and get out. Get it?

Kwas: Got it.

Yana: Good. Now go for it!

(CLUNK CLUNK CLUNK)

Kwas: Clear fore of the Triton.

(CLUNK CLUNK CLUNK)

Arilou: Whistler to the rear! Taking the shot!

(PSSHOW-CRACKLE)

Echo: WHISTLE.

Arilou: Echo down.

Kwas: Okay, people, move out - two by two, leapfrog towards the colony entrance!

(CLUNK CLUNK CLUNK CLUNK CLUNK)

Myst: In position behind the sub. Tossing flare.

(WHSS-THUD)

dmboogie: Arilou! Jellyfish at two o'clock high!

Arilou: Taking the shot.

(KSSHOW-CRACKLE)

Arilou: No go.

dmboogie: Let me give it a go.

(KSSHOW-CRACKLE)

Hallucinoid: SPLAT.

(CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH)

dmboogie: 'Nother jellyfish, twelve high!

Arilou: Taking the shot.

(KSSHOW-CRACKLE)

Hallucinoid: SPLAT.

(VWOINK-BZBZBZ)

Kwas: Must . . . kill . . .

(THUPP-CRACKLE THUPP-CRACKLE THUPP-CRACKLE)

(FZZT-CRACKLE)

(BLOOP)

Echo: WHISTLE.

Princeps: C'mon, Kwas, snap out of it! Echo's not all that - he blew himself up, for fuck's sake!

(VWOINK-BZBZBZ)

(FZZT-CRACKLE)

(BLOOP)

Echo: WHISTLE.

(VWOINK-BZBZBZ VWOINK-BZBZBZ)

Kwas: Must . . . stand . . . alone . . .

Princeps: . . . Yeah, whatever.

Kwas: Wha-? What just happened?

Myst: I dunno what happened to you, but I see one of those Tentaculats comin' up over that arm of the colony!

(THUPP-CRACKLE THUPP-CRACKLE)

Myst: No effect!

Griffiths: I see it!

(KSSHOW-CRACKLE)

Griffiths: Missed! Arilou, you got a clear shot?

Arilou: Affirmative. Brain is lined up.

(KSSHOW-CRACKLE)

Tentaculat: SPLORP.

(CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH)

Myst: Echo to the north of the sub!

Princeps: I see it. Taking the shot.

(KSSHOW-CRACKLE)

Aquatoid: EEEOW!

(SQUISH SQUISH SQUISH SQUISH)

Cousteau: I 'ave an Echo sighted. Taking the shot.

(THUPP-CRACKLE)

Aquatoid: EEEOW!

Cousteau: 'E will no longer be a burden.

(KSSHOW-CRACKLE)

Princeps: Oh, HELL no Echo!

(KSSHOW-CRACKLE)

Echo: WHISTLE.

(SHLERK SHLERK SHLERK SHLERK SHLERK)

Princeps: BRAIN!

(KSSHOW-CRACKLE)

Tentaculat: SPLORP.

(THUMP THUMP THUMP)

dmboogie: Whistler outside the lift-room door. Taking the shot.

(KSSHOW-CRACKLE)

Echo: WHISTLE.

(SQUISH SQUISH SQUISH)

Aldred: Echos in the lift room! I count three!

dmboogie: Aldred, catch!

(WHSS-THUD WHSS-THUD)

(WHABOOM)

(INCOMPREHENSIBLE ALIEN SCREAMS FROM THE LIFT ROOM)

Aldred: Sounds like we pissed 'em off, sir!

Kwas: Well, let's get busy killing them off, shall we? Move in, people - clear out that lift garrison!

Aldred: Aye, sir!

(THUPP-CRACKLE THUPP-CRACKLE)

(KSSHOW-CRACKLE)

Echo: WHISTLE.

Gotti: Fire in the hole!

(WHSS-THUD)

(WHABOOM)

(THUMP THUMP THUMP)

Griffiths: Brain on the upper balcony!

(KSSHOW-CRACKLE)

Tentaculat: SPLORP.

Arilou: Aquatoid on the balcony, above the door!

(KSSHOW-CRACKLE)

Aquatoid: EEEOW!

dmboogie: Whistler near the access lift!

(KSSHOW-CRACKLE)

Echo: WHISTLE.

dmboogie: Looks like the lift garrison's clear, sir!

Kwas: Okay, people, make for the lift! Double-time!

(THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP)

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