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You play Final Fantasy Five, the best Final Fantasy game. The only difference is, you are allowed only four jobs, one from each crystal. And they are randomly assigned to you. When you beat Exdeath, your picture must show all four of those jobs being used to qualify you as a winner.Here we go.
I watch the intro, realising that excretement just got real. Alas, I do not have a team to pose with. Yet. I'm minding my own business, worshipping the fire gods, when suddenly a meteorite comes out of the sky and causes an earthquake. Resolving to find out what just happened (because I presume I was busy worshipping the fire gods to notice the meteorite), I jump onto my trusted mount, who happens to be some sort of chicken. I realize that my chicken mount has suddenly become a giant as he enters the after the overworld. Darn, I really must stop taking all those- GASP! I have been attacked by goblins! And my mount is no longer a giant! What sorcery is this? It can't be mine, I'm still a freelancer right now. Oh, if only I had given away my soul to the Eldritch Abominations earlier to recieve unholy powers before now! Alas, When All You Have Is a Hammer..., hit the enemy with a sword! ... Well, that was easy. I hear that having things on your bearing may make it harder to breathe when unconcious. I shall mug the body of 20 gil. For saftey reasons. I don't even want to know why they had a kidnapped person with them. Ooh, look, she's awake. Huh, my name? Well, originally it was Buttz, but, uh, let's not go with that. Hello, I am Bartz. The fire gods did inform me corretly! It was a meteorite! Wait, the pretty lady is leaving. Nooooooooo, I don't want to be alone again! Wait, I think we found an unconcious old man. Why are unconcious people all over the place these days? Well, forget him, I'm going to randomly walk around to find a secret Phoenix Down. Aw, darnit, the overworld has me trapped. Darn railroading physics. What's this? The old man, Galuf, has amnesia. Well, I'm sure that's the only affect being so close to a meteorite as it hit the planet will have on him, I'm sure he won't suffer any other consequences. The other have gone to the windy place. I'm all like, so what man? Darn you. I got stuff to do man. With my giant chicken. Wait, more goblins. Hahah, taste my sword, ye naives! No, wait, stop that chicken. No! Do not rescue them! I command you! Darnit. Since you've gone to the trouble of rescuing them, I may as well get on this big lump of land and wait until they get up, looking all badass. The others are all woken up now. Such a shame all those earthquakes have made it impossible to get back to where I originally was, so I guess I now have to go with you. Darnit. Apparently, these earthquakes have caused the creation of a cave, which already has a secret pirate hideout in it and special items hidden through it. Darn, those pirates work fast.
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