* AlternateCharacterInterpretation: While Mr. Welch is clearly a Loonie, there are plenty of cases where the rules seem simply designed to insure the GM can railroad the campaign. For example:
-->410. If the NPC is on the cover of the rulebook, I can't kill him.
* BigLippedAlligatorMoment: Zig-zagged. A majority of Mr. Welch's events are to be reminded as something that never happens again, or otherwise made a BLAM by virtue of whatever rules the DM imposes at the time. Sometimes, Welch himself wishes to perform a BLAM or something of the like and is immediately instructed of how unacceptable the BLAM would be:
-->93. I am to remind my DM that he must never, ever give my paladin a dire boar for a mount again.
-->114. The Demilich only falls for getting stuffed in the bag of holding once.
-->197. My epic level character cannot take on the minor goblin menace to his country just to stay sharp.
-->270. I cannot derail the adventure for a two hour in character discussion on the qualities of rope.
-->316. My character is not allowed to commit suicide five minutes into the campaign.
-->354. Tricking the party into killing each other off and then turning in their corpses for the bounty is frowned upon.
-->382. I can't bet the power gamer he can't solo the module.
-->424. I cannot liven up the adventure with [[Recap/BuffyTheVampireSlayerS6E7OnceMoreWithFeeling snappy musical numbers]]. Even if they did it on [[Series/BuffyTheVampireSlayer the TV show]].
-->426. Thirty minutes after a massive battle against Cathayans I am not bloodthirsty again.
-->434. Never again will I convince a player to keep a character nicknamed "Stumpy [=McLunger=]"
-->570. The DM does not want to know how my human fighter is triple wielding scimitars.
-->575. Even if I'm a near immortal demi-god with the power to create entire worlds with a thought, still bad to throw a party when Dad's away without permission.
-->584. On second thought, a minotaur architect is a really bad idea.
-->598. Any adventure that ends up with my character being worshiped as an orc god was just a dream. Retroactively if need be.
-->599. Cannot start the new adventure with me trying to run down who ever didn't show up for the last adventure.
-->634. Cannot recreate any scene in 2001: Space Odyssey involving women's lingerie.
-->727. Cannot singlehandedly make Starfleet Academy the #1 party school in the Alpha Quadrant.
-->806. My character cannot have a noticeable impact, positive or negative, on a town's population.
-->1273. Any character that makes a seasoned Rifts player flinch is vetoed, and shall never be spoken of again.
-->1327. Just because the Great Race of Yith’s effect on sanity is minimal, doesn’t mean I should invite them over for dinner with the folks.
-->1428. No spending half the game session seeing what rhymes with Nyarlathotep.
-->1708. No bringing up the time we were nearly TPK'd by a jerboa.
-->2002. No flashbacks to the death of the disposable expository NPC at the start of the adventure.
* CrazyAwesome: Can you imagine dealing with just ''one'' of the situations he's barred from?
-->211. If at any point my dwarf takes on the mannerisms of Macho Man RandySavage, he dies.