[[quoteright:350:http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/c875733e6e587c53625def38b3f470d0_1826.jpg]]

''Unskippable'' is a weekly web series hosted on Website/TheEscapist. Graham and Paul [[DeadpanSnarker snark]] over the opening {{cutscene}}s of various video games, [[AlternateDVDCommentary in a style]] [[WordOfGod inspired by]] ''Series/MysteryScienceTheater3000''.

The show was born as part of the Escapist Film Festival, where its pilot episode garnered enough votes to become a regular feature. It proved successful with the site's audience (who liked a bit of [[WebAnimation/ZeroPunctuation game humor]]), and has continued ever since.

Cutscenes are chosen based on several factors ([[ArtifactTitle and yes, they can be skippable]]). Terrible writing, poor pacing, and [[ClicheStorm Cliche Storms]] are a plus, but even great cinematics can get the Unskippable treatment if the duo can think of enough silly things to say about them.

In 2009, Unskippable finally took on Hideo Kojima, the king of overwrought cutscenes, with [[VideoGame/MetalGearSolid4 Metal Gear August]], a satirical look at ''Guns of the Patriots''. As expected, the game was so cutscene-heavy that it took them 5 episodes to get through an amount equivalent to most of the other games they review.

The episodes can be found [[http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/unskippable here.]]

The snarkers in question, Graham Stark and Paul Sanders, are also the creators of ''LoadingReadyRun''. They have also experimented with a live LetsPlay, found [[http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/lets-play/2031-Legaia-2-Part-1 here]]. This morphed into a new series called Graham & Paul Let's Play, found [[http://loadingreadyrun.com/videos/archive/gplp/date/desc here]].
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!!!This series provides examples of:
* AerithAndBob: Noted in ''MagnaCarta 2'': "Schuenzeit, Rzephillda, and... Alex?"
* AlternateDVDCommentary: The whole point of the series. Directly parodied in their ''Wolverine'' review:
-->'''Narrator:''' In the not-too-distant future...
-->'''Graham and Paul:''' ''(singing)'' [[MysteryScienceTheater3000 Next Sunday, AD...]]
** And becomes a brick joke in their ''VideoGame/MetalGearSolid4'' review:
--->'''Openning Text:''' In the not-too-distant future...
--->'''Graham:''' ''(singing)'' [[MysteryScienceTheater3000 In the not-too-distant future...]]
--->'''Paul:''' We've already done this joke.
--->'''Graham:''' Well it's not my fault it starts the same way as Wolverine!
* ArbitrarySkepticism: In their ''VideoGame/{{Damnation}}'' video:
-->''"I don't think [[FanService that shirt]] is historically accurate."''
-->''"And the robots are?"''
-->''"...Yes?"''
-->''"Okay."''
* AGoodNameForARockBand:
** [[SubvertedTrope Subverted]] in the ''[[MagnaCarta Magna Carta 2]]'' video:
---> ''"...formed by Count Alex and the lords of neighboring cities."''
---> "Despite the name, Lords of Neighboring Cities is actually a solo artist, he and Alex used to be roommates, so they formed an army."
** "The Power The Baby Gave Me" in ''MetroidOtherM''.
** ''DarkSouls'' gives us "The Witch of Izalith And Her Daughters Of Chaos", "The Furtive Pygmy", and "Foggy Forest".
*** Not to mention their cover band from ''[[VideoGame/DeusExHumanRevolution Deus Ex: Human Revolution]]'', "Backblast Problem".
** Disgaea 2 gave them "Massive Demon Power Vacuum".
* AllMenArePerverts: Watching ''VideoGame/{{Bayonetta}}'':
--> '''Paul:''' Are we allowed to keep watching this?
--> '''Graham:''' ...I hope so!
** Also during their ''VideoGame/DarkMessiah'' review.
** Paul hints at it with a comment about the girls' outfit in the ''VideoGame/{{Vanquish}}'' review.
* ArtifactTitle: they now mock skippable cutscenes, and even not-particularly-interactive first-person sequences. This is [[LampshadeHanging Lampshaded]] first in the ''Videogame/QuantumOfSolace'' episode, and then again in the ''VideoGame/Left4Dead'' episode.
* BaitAndSwitch - ''Venetica'' Part 2's [[TheStinger Stinger]];
-->"And so begins the adventure of an unlikely hero. But he got killed, so now we get to watch his girlfriend get clothes from the blacksmith."
* BigNo - In their ''[[VideoGame/RedFaction Red Faction: Guerilla]]'' video, when [[spoiler: the brother dies]]
* CheeseEatingSurrenderMonkeys: Subverted. They doubted other countries would do much better against the demon invasion in ''VideoGame/{{Onimusha}} 3''.
** However, in an episode of their ''[[VideoGame/LegendOfLegaia Legaia 2]]'' Let's Play, they joke that the "Flag of Retreat" that they just found is France's flag.
* ClusterFBomb: They tend to mock its use as filler or generic intensifies, often by pretending its literal meaning is intended.
* ColorCodedCharacters: [[LampshadeHanging Lampshaded]] in the E3 2010 trailer of ''{{Tron}} Evolution: The Video Game''.
* ContinuityNod: These are usually the same as their running gags. The ''VideoGame/GrandiaIII'' episode included a throwaway reference to a joke from their ''VideoGame/TheGetaway'' episode.
** And again in the ''The Bouncer'' episode with a reference to their ''VideoGame/DirgeOfCerberus'' vid.
*** And again in their ''DigitalDevilSaga'' episode. This appears to be a trend.
*** The Darkness spawned a running tally on the theme of "And that was the ''Nth'' time I died", for whenever the protagonist loses consciousness while in first person.
*** [[ShoutOut It even popped up]] in the [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8Kvuu68Xlo&t=1h3m22s first episode of]] ''LetsPlay/SpoilerWarning'' (a LetsPlay of ''Franchise/MassEffect''), done by fellow Escapist contributors, [[DMOfTheRings Shamus Young]], Josh Viel, and Randy Johnson.
---->And that was the seventh time I died.
---->(laughs) I don't think we can use that joke, Randy.
** Many references to Samanosuke from ''VideoGame/{{Onimusha}} 3'', and "That guy from ''LostOdyssey''". "Well hello there, Mister Resilient. Didn't he just get blown up? Twice?"
** And the shouting of "MATILDA!!!" when the planes took off in ''VideoGame/{{Haze}}'', a nod to an emotional cutscene from ''AceCombat 6''.
** Flowers coming from "scenic [[EternalSonata Tenuto]]"
** [[http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/unskippable/1431-Darksiders A reference]] to the "Bernie" cutscene character from ''LostPlanet'', which goes all the way back to [[http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/unskippable/394-First-Place-Unskippable-01-Lost-Planet the pilot episode]] (which some viewers might not have seen, because the pilot wasn't available among the regular episodes initially).
** When they did ''VideoGame/JakIIRenegade'', they equate the Dark Jak transformation with a Werehog. When they actually ''do'' ''VideoGame/SonicUnleashed'', One of the lines used for Sonic's transformation scene is "I'm gonna kill Praxis!"
** Their riff of ''VideoGame/GrandiaIII''' involved them mistaking a particularly hot mom for the main character's older sister. The very next video had them purposely going out of their way to avoid referring to the characters' relationships to avoid a repeat mistake.
** From their ''VideoGame/{{Battlefield}}: [[VideoGame/BattlefieldBadCompany Bad Company]]'' episode: "And thus is the curse of the controllable vehicle section at the beginning of first-person shooters. ''VideoGame/TheDarkness'', ''VideoGame/FarCry2'', ''BadCompany''... you will never end one ''conscious''."
** Several times now, if a crow (well, it was a raven once) shows up in the cutscene, they refer to him as "[[RussellCrowe Russell]]," and even act as if this is the same bird throughout the various games.
*** In the episode for ''VideoGame/MortalKombat9'', they refer to an undead vulture as "Russell's evil brother from the Netherrealm."
** DeadRising. "It's quiet." "Yes, [[EternalSonata almost strangely quiet...]]"
** LostOdyssey: [[EternalSonata "Hey, I thought you said puddles don't make waves."]]
** ''{{VideoGame/Dishonored}}'': "So ''these'' were the guys that attacked Bayman in ''[[VideoGame/DeadOrAlive DoA]] 5!'' It all makes sense now!"
* CrazyPrepared: The bandits from the ''Fist of the North Star'' game, who evidently put up cages in ten foot increments across the ''entire desert''.
* CreditsGag: Since most of the cutscenes that they lampoon are the intros, they get a lot of mileage out of this type of joke.
* {{Crossover}} with ''WebAnimation/ZeroPunctuation''. Yahtzee joined them for ''Star Ocean'', and in return Graham gave a brief ''X-Blades'' review as an opener for Yahtzee's ''Halo Wars'' video.
* CutscenePowerToTheMax:
** In the ''VideoGame/DirgeOfCerberus'' video, when Vincent jumps up, flips over a helicopter, and shoots it out of the sky.
-->'''Paul:''' [[LampshadeHanging You know, this seems like a really fun game to]] ''[[RunningGag play]]''. Maybe we could get to do that at some point.
-->'''Graham:''' Yet somehow I suspect when you actually do get to play the game, you can't do any of those things.
** Also in the video for ''DMCDevilMayCry'', when Dante activates a power he doesn't have to heal a bunch of cuts on his back after a night of rough sex.
-->'''Graham:''' Wait, he has a HealingFactor?! That's not part of the gameplay!
-->'''Paul:''' Unfortunately it only works on sex scratches. Most enemies don't do that to you.
* DarkReprise: Graham gives the main KatamariDamacy theme one in ''Cabela's Survival: Shadows of Katmai''
* DeadpanSnarker: Two of them. Plus a third in the episode where [[{{Crossover}} Yahtzee shows up.]]
* DefconFive: Averted in their review of ''Tom Clancy's Ghost Recon Advanced Warfighter 2'':
-->(screen lists Defcon 4)
-->'''Paul:''' ''(sarcastically)'' Oooh, Defcon 4. Just so you know, Defcon 4 is not that scary. The US is ''currently'' at Defcon 3.
-->'''Graham:''' Defcon 3 is worse, by the way.
* DesignatedVillain: [[invoked]] In the episode for ''VideoGame/{{Genji}}'', the expository narration lays out that the villainous Heishi have already been defeated, and the opening cutscene is basically an extended conspiracy by the Genji clan, who are supposed to be the heroes, to carry out an ethnic cleansing campaign against the no-longer-a-threat Heishi. This leads the guys to a sudden realization:
-->'''Paul:''' You know, the more I hear about these guys wanting to exterminate the Heishi, the more I realize we only have these guys' word to go on that the Heishi are the bad guys.
* DiagonalCut: In ''{{Genji}}''. "Good to see this game's hitting on all the right cliches."
* DisturbedDoves: Commenting the wedding at the start of ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyXII'' must have had a JohnWoo fight scene in there.
* EnsembleDarkhorse: Okay, not really an ensemble, but the guys declared the chicken in the opening of ''VideoGame/FableIII'' to be the "most compelling" character of any cut scene they watched.[[invoked]]
* FakeOutOpening: Done for their AprilFoolsDay 2010 episode. [[spoiler: Instead of ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyXIII'', they riff the opening cinematic and credits for ''[[VideoGame/FinalFantasyVI Final Fantasy III (USA).]]]]''
* FauxToGuide: Their 100th episode was about how to make more cutscenes like those they mock.
* FlatWhat:
** Their response to the weird ending to the opening of ''Cursed Crusade''.
** Their response to ''a horse doing a barrel roll'' in the opening of ''Dynasty Warriors 8''.
* FranchiseZombie: "You get the impression Sonic Team really wants to be making other games, but they aren't allowed to, so they keep having to ram Sonic into the games they'd rather be making?"
* FreudWasRight: "''That'' did ''not'' sound like dying." [[invoked]]
** CreditsGag in ''ShadowsOfTheDamned'': "Let's just say what the developers were all thinking: PENIS PENIS PENIS PENIS"
* FridgeLogic: Invoked in the ''Film/XMenOriginsWolverine Uncaged'' video. "[[ShootingSuperman Were these guys]] ''[[ShootingSuperman briefed]]''?" "Why would you arm your men with weapons you ''know'' won't hurt him?", etc.
** They also wonder where all the skeletons that make up [[DarkSouls Nito, First of the Dead]] came from if there wasn't anyone to die and make skeletons. [[invoked]]
* GameplayAndStorySegregation: Thoroughly mocked in several episodes. In their ''DevilMayCry'' video, they [[CrowningMomentOfFunny actually took a moment to demonstrate this.]]
* GenreSavvy: They sorta have to be to spot all the clichés.
* GilliganCut: DoubleSubversion. In ''VideoGame/JakIIRenegade'', they called one, it didn't happen, but another cut happened, and they were happy.
* HeyItsThatVoice: Their reaction when they realized that the same voice actress did the opening monologues for both ''EternalSonata'' and ''AceCombat 6'', and again, though with a different emotional response, when they realize "Commander 'Lightspeed' Kenny" is also in ''VideoGame/RedFaction: Guerilla''.
** And in the end credits of ''VideoGame/AssassinsCreedII'', it becomes "Hey its that guy", with "Nolan North isn't just doing the same voice in every game, he's doing the same character."
** The ''{{Halo}} ODST'' credits read "NathanFillion plays the same character in everything and, frankly, I'm okay with that."
* HilariouslyAbusiveChildhood: Used for a quick joke in their ''VideoGame/{{Bayonetta}}'' video:
-->'''Bayonetta:''' You look tired. Let me tuck you in.
-->'''Paul:''' By which I mean, punch you in the face repeatedly.
-->'''Graham:''' ''(verbal shrug)'' That's how my mother used to tuck ''me'' in.
* {{Homage}}: Noted in the video for ''Hunted: The Demon's Forge''.
-->"This shot courtesy of ''Series/GameOfThrones''." (later) "This shot courtesy of ''[[Film/TheLordOfTheRings The Two Towers]]''."
* HostileShowTakeover: Graham took over ''WebAnimation/ZeroPunctuation'' on AprilFoolsDay 2009 (Yahtzee regains power less than two minutes in).
* HoYay: Hooo boy, [[VideoGame/DevilMayCry Dante vs. Nero.]] "Stop it, now I'm seeing symbolism in everything!" [[invoked]]
* HurricaneOfPuns: The ''VideoGame/BionicCommando'' video. "All right, you guys might wanna settle in, [[LampshadeHanging we got a million of these]]."
* InsistentTerminology: Like a fair portion of the old-school Sonic fans. From the ''VideoGame/{{Bayonetta}}'' review: "It's ''Robotnik''!"
* InstantAwesomeJustAddNinja: Civil War Ninjas in ''VideoGame/{{Damnation}}''.
* LamePunReaction: In the ''VideoGame/ArcRiseFantasia'' video, the hero and a dragon are falling from the sky, and Paul says the game should be called "Arc ''Fall''Fantasia". Graham imitated a shout, saying "Get off the stage!".
* LaughablyEvil: A variant. They think [[FarCry3 Vaas]] would be fun to hang out with 75% of the time, and "ungodly terrifying" the remaining 25%.
* LoadsAndLoadsOfLoading: In a different sense than the usual one. Early in ''The Darkness'', the protagonist receives an unloaded shotgun. Which he then spends several minutes slowly, carefully loading in the middle of a heated car chase. This is thoroughly mocked.
* MadeOfIron: That chicken at the start of ''Fable 3''. Hoo boy. However...
** [[spoiler:ShootTheShaggyDog: Eventually its luck runs out.]]
* MemeticBadass: They think the dog in ''DeadToRights'' is way more badass than his owner and suggest that to underscore this there should have been a scene of the dog lapping up whiskey out of a bowl.[[invoked]]
* MoralDissonance: Lampshaded InUniverse with ''{{Genji}}: Days of the Blade'', when they note the good guys were apparently trying to commit genocide.
* MundaneMadeAwesome: "FRANK WEST, ACTION PHOTOGRAPHER"
* NamesToRunAwayFromReallyFast: Mocked in the VideoGame/{{Prototype}} episode. "Gent- *sigh* ...Has anything good ''ever'' come out of a company called Gentek?" "No. Not once."
* NinjaPirateZombieRobot: (From ''VideoGame/{{Damnation}}'') "What, mechs ''and'' Lincoln?! Fingers crossed for [[HistoricalHilarity Mecha Lincoln]]!" And later, Zombie General Mecha Grant.
* NoYou: From ''DigitalDevilSaga''.
-->'''Graham:''' That's a terrible strategy.
-->'''Paul:''' YOU'RE a terrible strategy.
-->'''Graham:''' ...Ouch.
* ObviouslyEvil: From their StarWarsTheOldRepublic episode.
--> We know he's a Sith, but just to make sure, let's make him ''look like {{Satan}}.''
** The also commented that Queen Catalina in ''{{VideoGame/Trapt}}'' could look a little more evil. Her [[GoodColorsEvilColors hair could be black]] and [[HighCollarOfDoom her collar could be even higher]].
* ReferenceOverdosed
* RunningGag:
** The line "And that was the [number]th time I died," every time a cutscene ends with the main character's apparent death. Lampshaded in the stinger for ''VideoGame/TheDarkness'' where they mention they considered retiring the gag but it just comes up too often.
** Also from ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyVII: VideoGame/DirgeOfCerberus'': "I've got my eye on you, moon."
** Today's soundtrack brought to you by Eyebrows And The Thugs.
** This is Three Dog, Aooooo!
** "Hey X, you're a Y." "So are you. Shut up."
** " That's the second [adjective]iest [noun] that I've ever seen!"
*** ...which is a ShoutOut to ''VideoGame/MonkeyIsland'' or ''Series/GetSmart''.
** The frequent appearance of a [[RussellCrowe crow named Russell]] to talk to the audience whilst he eats dead bodies.
*** Recently [[LampshadeHanging Lampshaded]] in their ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyXII'' video.
---->''"You know, I never noticed how many crows there are in cutscenes."''
*** The best part about this one is that, according to WordOfGod, the pun in Russell's name was ''unintentional''.
** "''(I) blame the taint''." referencing the ridiculous name for the forces of evil from the ''TwoWorlds'' intro cutscene
** "Traffic chopper nine, we have serious [event] here" whenever a helicopter appears.
** Evil porpoises.
** Whenever a character is named in front of them (Exxaple: Jack in Syndicate), they say, completely [[DeadpanSnarker deadpan]], "Hello X".
** Whenever a StandardEstablishingSpaceshipShot is used, they'll sing "Rip-off, this is a rip-off! Get to the show!" to the tune of the StarWars theme.
** Whenever someone is referred to as the elder, they'll insist the elder is not that old.
-->''I'm only a couple of years older than you, stop calling me the elder.''
** Not used quite as often, the name Chad gets mocked quite often, particularly in the episode for ''VideoGame/XMenDestiny'', when they declare that both male playable characters are clearly named Chad.
* SayMyName: Thoroughly mocked in the ''[[DevilMayCry Devil May Cry 4]]'' video.
-->''"Nero!"''
-->''"Kyrie!"''
-->''"Dante!"''
-->''"KRATOS!"''
-->''"SPAARRTAAA!"''
* [[ShootingSuperman Shooting Wolverine]]: "Were they not briefed?"
** In the ''VideoGame/{{Prototype 2}}'' review they call out James Heller for his repeated attempts to kill the near-invincible Alex Mercer by stabbing him despite this not even messing up his jacket.
--> "Your knife is not doing anything! Stop trying to use it!"
* ShoutOut: Many.
** To ''TheGoonShow'', of all things:
---> Game: "She's a spy!"
---> "She's a shepherd."
---> "SHEPHERD SPY!"
** And in the Dark Sector episode ''Six String Samurai''.
** In the ''VideoGame/ValkyriaChronicles'' episode:
--->'''Alicia:''' Flowers, bugs and fish.
--->'''Graham and Paul:''' [[WizardOfOz Oh my.]]
** There's a subtle one in the Assassin's Creed 2 video.
--->Game: "Time is precious, doubly so these days."
--->"[[TheHitchhikersGuideToTheGalaxy Is it lunch-time]]?"
* SorryILeftTheBGMOn: Played with in ''VideoGame/RadiataStories'', but also in ''{{Genji}}'': Days of the Blade'': "Oh, there's an actual flute in the scene. I thought that's just what Japan sounded like at night."
* SpaceWestern:
** When seeing a duster-and-fedora-clad man pull out pistols in the trailer/opening cutscene of ''VideoGame/StarWarsTheOldRepublic'', they remark that Star Wars was always a Space Western, but they'd never seen it have a ''space cowboy'' before.
** Also mocked in the episode for ''VideoGame/{{Starhawk}}''. The guys joke that the cowboy-themed outfits are the result of a villain stealing everyone's clothes while they were at a cowboy-themed costume party, thus forcing them all to wear their cowboy costumes full time.
* SpaceX: If a spaceship was full of slaves, they should be rowing with space oars.
* SpecialGuest: Ladies and Gentlemen, [[http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/unskippable/644-Star-Ocean-The-Last-Hope Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw]], of ''WebAnimation/ZeroPunctuation''. One of them returned the favor.
* SteamPunk: "Oh man, I wish steam power was ''this'' cool."
* SticksToTheBack: Mocked in the ''TwoWorlds'' episode.
* StockScream: Lampshaded in the intro of ''VideoGame/RedFaction: Guerilla''.
** Also in the Bionic Commando intro, when there is a particularly out-of-place Wilhelm scream.
* TheCoronerDothProtestTooMuch: When a woman in the ''Vampire Rain'' intro feels like she's being followed on a brightly lit street, [[TooDumbToLive she ducks into a dark alley]]. The crew comments that in horror movies, this is clasified as a suicide.
* TheyFightCrime: The protagonist setup in ''VideoGame/{{Onimusha}} 3''.
** Also in the episode for ''VideoGame/DMCDevilMayCry'', at the title screen Graham suggests that "DmC" stands "Donkey, Marmot, and Cow. They fight crime!"
* ThrowingYourSwordAlwaysWorks: "Huh, I guess arrows are for sissies, real men throw swords."
* TranslationConvention: "Why is it that everyone was speaking English in feudal Japan, but now in modern day France they're speaking French?"
* UnnecessarilyCreepyRobot: A variant, they question the choice in ''VideoGame/{{Defiance}}'' to have the [[HolographicInterface EGO interface]] manifest as a creepy ghost that appears behind you.
* UnnecessarilyLargeInterior: Really called on ''VideoGame/{{Vanquish}}'' for having this on a space station.
* UnskippableCutscene: Sort of.
** In the ''Videogame/QuantumOfSolace'' video, Graham suddenly realizes that there's a Press A To Skip prompt in the corner and seemed embarrassed.
** Likewise, in their review for ''VideoGame/Left4Dead'', both are taken by surprise at the ability to skip the cutscene that they scramble looking for the controller, only to find it has run down its batteries, forcing them to continue to watch.
** For their LetsPlay of ''Legaia 2'' Graham noted that he was pressing every button he could to try and skip the opening.
** In the episode for ''VideoGame/DeadIsland'' a "Press O to Skip" prompt appears in the corner, but the guys refuse to press it for fear that it's a trap.
* UnstoppableRage: ''Wolverine Uncaged'' - "Good ''lord'' man, do you have a stabbing quota?"
* WallOfText: ''{{Zoids}} Assault''. "Did you load a ''book'' into the 360?"
* WeirdMoon: A RunningGag is that the moon in (especially JRPG) cutscenes is "so big that if real, the Earth would long ago have been torn apart by tidal forces". Seeing a big moon in a non-JRPG game sometimes causes them to quip "Is this set in Japan?"
* WhatDoYouMeanItsNotForKids: [[invoked]]''VideoGame/JakIIRenegade'' shows content they say makes parents regret buying this cartoony game.
* WhyDontYouMarryIt: Joked about in ''StarOceanTheLastHope''
* XCalledTheyWantTheirYBack: "Todd [=McFarlane=] called. ComicBook/{{Spawn}} wants his cape back." to Vincent's cape in ''VideoGame/DirgeOfCerberus''.
* YeOldeButcheredeEnglishe: Made fun of in the ''TwoWorlds'' episode.
* YourMom: courtesy of [[WebAnimation/ZeroPunctuation Yahtzee]]:
-->Oh yeah? Well I think I gave his mum a "small straight" last night. AND SHE LOVED IT.
** In the ''Viking'' video, Paul does this to ''himself:''
-->'''Narrator:''' ''What was once green and fertile was now soured and barren.''
-->'''Paul:''' ''Hey! Leave my mom out of this!''
----