''[[foldercontrol]]

[[folder: From the electronic logs of Galactic Observation Dominion agent #2192, Dr. Squid. BEGIN TRANSMISSION. ]]
''

Agent #2192 of the Galactic Observation Dominion, codenamed "Dr. Squid", has been assigned to observe the people of Earth, up close, from an unassuming house in suburbia. The good doctor, however, hates his assignment with a passion, and would rather destroy Earth, just to rid himself of the annoyance. He begrudgingly performs his task of interacting with the people of Earth, assisted by his hapless manservant Malachi, a reanimated, {{Restraining Bolt}}ed corpse. Occasionally, his boss, Lord Calimar, shows up to monitor Squid's progress and remind him that he is not amused with Squid's shenanigans.

''The Audio Logs of Dr Squid'' started as a series of written articles on [=Sawtooth's=]' Website/DeviantArt page, but became SuddenlyVoiced when they enlisted a few fellow voice actors (including Creator/ThornBrain from [[WebVideo/SgtFrogAbridged TheMidnightFrogs]]) and a few local friends, to read them and post the resulting audio on Website/YouTube.

The channel has since been deleted, and the episodes have not been reuploaded anywhere.

!!Malachi, start the Troping process!
* AliensSpeakingEnglish:
--> "Ah ah ah! You are speaking ''[[VideoGame/CommanderKeen Standard Galactic]]''. We had it first."
* AlienAbduction: To get test subjects.
* TheAllegedCar: Tinsley's car, which goes from being crushed by a transportation pod to being rebuilt by Squid, then driven straight into a tree at top speed.
* BlatantLies: "Lying. Lots of lying."
* BigShutUp: Squid to the mob outside his house in episode 10.
* BreadEggsBreadedEggs: Subverted in Episode 11:
-->'''Dr Squid''': "It's the next day, and we've called in the services of a specialist qualified to provide a [driver's] license. Waiting in the passenger's side of our car is an instructor in the skill of driving these contraptions. An instructor for driving. "Driving instructor". I believe they're referred to as... "[[LastSecondWordSwap transportationados]]."
-->'''Malachi''': "They're not."
* BreadEggsMilkSquick:
** Episode 10:
-->'''Dr Squid''': "Greetings, good evening, morning, or snowstorm. Whichever applies to you."
* TheCameo: Keroro from ''WebVideo/SgtFrogAbridged'' appears in episode 10.
* CharacterCatchphrase: "Can do!" from Mr. Groenendyke. Two by Dr. Squid:
** "Quasars almighty!"
** "This is hardly ideal..."
* ChurchOfHappyology: Averted: Squid is visited by Scientologists themselves in episode 10. And it turns out everything about their religion is real, Creator/LRonHubbard is alive (and a conspiratorial racist), and Squid insulted him to his face at a G.O.D. conference.
* CloudCuckoolander: Mr. Groenendyke and Hannah.
* CombatTentacles: Subverted. They can't flip switches.
* CuteKitten: Spider-cat.
* DropInCharacter: Mr. Groenendyke and Tinsley Limbeck.
* EldritchAbomination: The dread lord [[/folder]]

[[folder: Cosmodar ]]
, who apparently sounds like Creator/ChristopherWalken.
* EmbarrassingNickname: Dr. Squid loathes his codename.
* FateWorseThanDeath: As mentioned in Episode 4, being sent to The Planet Of Noxious Fume People.
* FourOneNineScam: Dr. Squid thinks he's fooling the "Nigerian General" to appear in person to collect, so that he can capture him and use him for ransom.
* FreakLabAccident: When Spider-cat walks across the console.
* FunWithAcronyms: '''G'''alactic '''O'''bservation '''D'''ominion.
* HappyMarriageCharade: Tinsley and Hannah, whose answering machine catches Tinsley as he snaps at Hannah's {{cloudcuckoolander}} moment.
* HilariousOuttakes: From episodes 2, 4, 5, 8, 9, and 11.
* HisNameReallyIsBarkeep: Robot.
** WhoNamesTheirKidDude: Malachi is very incredulous about it.
* INeedToGoIronMyDog: Hannah, in a moment of awkwardness.
-->"[[SayingSoundEffectsOutLoud Ding]]! Oh my, the roast is done. Gotta go!"
* InsistentTerminology:
** It's not a beard; they're his "faceticles".
** From episode 9:
--> "COMPOUND! Don't you DARE use a pathetically humanoid term such as 'house' to describe my base of operations!"
* LargeHam: Dr. Squid.
* MediumAwareness: Heavily lampshaded.
--> "Too bad you can't see this, listener, because it really is a sight to behold! My descriptions don't do it justice at all! I can't believe you don't get to see this, because it's astounding! SERIOUSLY!"
* MegaCorp: [=SmegCo=].
** ForInconveniencePressOne: The hold music is a cover of "[[Music/DaftPunk Around The World]]".
** OperatorFromIndia: Rajiv.
* MetaphorIsMyMiddleName
--> "Scarcity is my middle name! Pieter Scarcity Groenendyke! ...or maybe it's Neville."
* NoIndoorVoice: Robot.
* TheOnlyOneAllowedToDefeatYou: Squid doesn't want [[/folder]]

[[folder: Cosmodar ]]
to destroy Earth, because then he wouldn't get to do so.
* OnlySaneMan: Malachi.
* [[PrecisionFStrike Precision S Strike]]: By Robot, upon searching the internet for the meaning of "lawsuit".
* RunningGag: They just can't seem to get rid of Spider-cat.
* SesquipedalianLoquaciousness:
** Episode 11:
-->'''Dr Squid''': "You'll recall several months back the automaton whose orbital conveyance pod totaled our neighbor lump's automotive apparatus?"
-->'''Malachi''': *Sigh* "Yes, I remember how the ''robot'' in the ''spaceship'' crushed Mr. Limbeck's ''car''."
* SharedUniverse: With ''WebVideo/SgtFrogAbridged''. Hinted at with Carl's Commodes, made official with Keroro's cameo in Episode 10 and a remark from Giroro in SFA Episode 18.
* ShellShockedVeteran: Episode 11 hints at Malachi's traumatic past as a [[spoiler:pizza delivery driver.]]
* ShoutOut:
** He lives in the same universe as, and has had contact with, the [[VideoGame/StarCraft Protoss]], the [[WesternAnimation/InvaderZim Irkens]], the [[WesternAnimation/ExoSquad Neosapiens]], [[Franchise/StarWars the Gungans, the Jedi]], [[{{TabletopGame/Warhammer40000}} the Imperium of Man]]...
** He ordered a Thermal Core Buster Starter Package from [[Series/RedDwarf Smeg]]Co.
** The Carl's Commodes commercials are this to Todd's Toilets from ''WebVideo/SgtFrogAbridged''. The second commercial directly references Todd, though in a more TakeThat [[PrecisionFStrike fashion]].
** "[[Music/ThrobbingGristle Genesis Brand POrridge: it'll leave you throbbing!]]"
* SpiderLimbs: Spider-cat.
* TheStinger: Occasionally includes an additional scene or bloopers after the end credits.
* StockScream: There is a Wilhelm scream at the end of episode 10, from a huge fight which includes members of [[ShoutOut the Jedi Council]].
* TakeThat: Squid rips into Creator/LRonHubbard's infamous religion to his face in episode 10.
* TechnoBabble: From episode 3.
--> "The tachyon anomaly oscillator is still shot, the interface sublimator is leaking in a few places, every time we try to activate the neutron transference module it gives off some thick black smoke, and the molecular omniprocessor is completely scorched."
* ToiletHumor: The Carl's Commodes fake ad spots.
* UnusuallyUninterestingSight:
** Robot's sudden appearance in episode 9, to Squid. Malachi and Tinsley instead react as expected.
-->'''Malachi''': "'Just' a robot?! It fell out of the sky and nearly squashed us!"
-->'''Dr. Squid''': "Feh! You've seen one atmosphere-breaking pod with a robot inside, and you've seen them all."
** Several angry mobs outside Squid's house break into a fight in episode 10. Squid watches for a moment in amusement, then calmly closes the episode with this:
-->"Yyyep. Feels like Monday to me."
* WhatDoesThisButtonDo: Switch the visual to stock footage of a badger while a bass line plays in the background, apparently. Or overload the console.
----