[[WMG: Squirrel Girl doesn't have squirrel powers.]]
Those are trained squirrels. She's [[Literature/CharlieAndTheChocolateFactory Veruca Salt]]. After being thrown down the garbage chute she became obsessed with getting an army of squirrels. Daddy got her one squirrel, but she traveled the world, getting more squirrels to join her and she trained them to attack whoever she doesn't like. She went through Character Development and chose to be a superhero later.

[[WMG: Squirrel Girl doesn't have squirrel powers.]]
Squirrels have Squirrel Girl Powers.

[[WMG: Squirrel Girl is the 616 universe's [[{{Literature/Worm}} Taylor Hebert]] ]]
* Specifically, she's Taylor if she grew up in the slightly {{Lighter and Softer}} Marvel universe.
** Has the power to control small, seemingly insignificant animals? Check
** Has defeated major supervillains with little more than brains and her powers? Check
** Is a MemeticBadass of such a high order that she makes [[PhysicalGod Physical Gods]] tremble? '''Check'''

[[WMG: Squirrel Girl is the daughter of the Beyonder.]]
Her powers have not fully manifested themselves, but she unconsciously warps reality around herself. This allows the fourteen year old girl to beat heavy hitters of the Marvel universe who should otherwise mop the floor with her.
* WordOfGod is that her Squirrel powers are her ''only'' powers. How much of that you believe is up to you. Maybe she's the MarvelUniverse counterpart of Teela Brown, and was just BornLucky.
** Maybe the real revelation is that squirrels have unconscious reality warping powers!

[[WMG: In relation to the above, Squirrel Girl is A Beyonder.]]
She came from Beyond, where the [[Main/EldritchAbomination others stay and watch from the darkness]], and her ignorance of the Universe is what makes Moody and Gloomy comics so Alien and stupid to her. Her powers are dimmed by her human form, but make no mistake; She is the one of the most powerful beings in the Universe.

[[WMG: Squirrel Girl's real power is PlotArmor.]]
This is a minor power for almost all superheroes but she has made it her primary tool. That squirrel stuff is stage dressing, she would still win of she spent the entire time naked, bound and gagged and at the bottom of a volcano.
* Sounds [[FetishFuel hot]]. Wait how old is she again?
** Sounds [[LamePunReaction hot]]? Oh my god.
** 16-18. It's a little unclear at times.
*** Deadpool notes she's underage and therefore illegal so she's most likely 17.
*** Ages down to 16 are legal in some parts of the United States.
*** In fact, 17 ''is'' the legal age in New York, the center of the Marvel Universe.
* This troper would ''so'' read that comic.
* It is worth noting that Deadpool noted that she was underage something like two years ago.
** Then again, this is like saying "Bruce Wayne's got to be pushing 70 by now.."
*** [[BadassGrandpa Does that matter with Batman?]]
*** [[WesternAnimation/BatmanBeyond Only a little.]]

[[WMG: Squirrel Girl is a student of Miaowara Tomokato, the Samurai Cat.]]
Tomokato was the original practitioner of the martial art based on the Dark Side of Absurdity, which allows the wielder to exercise effective omnipotence and beat any foe, however cosmic, ''but only if the audience is laughing''. Does this sound familiar to anyone? Add in that Tomokato is himself a time-traveling and parallel-timeline-travelling anthropomorphic furry animal, and that his first candidate as his protege (his nephew Shiro) is a hideously unlikeable psychopathic brat, and its not unlikely that at sometime throughout his wanderings through all time and space, he met the utterly charming Doreen and decided that she was a more worthy successor to his school. (The character of Miaowara Tomokato is from the ''Samurai Cat'' novels by Mark E. Rogers).
* Supporting this is that its canonical that among the very long list of fictional realities Samurai Cat has visited is Hyperborea, which as we all know is part of the ancient past of the Marvel Universe. So he is entirely capable of having traveled to Earth-616.

[[WMG: Abilities pertaining to Squirrels are the ultimate power.]]
Power over Squirrels is no laughing matter, Doctor Doom, Maelstrom, MODOK, Terrax, and Thanos never really had a fighting chance. An army of Squirrels is far more formidable than any force of Doombots, Hydra, Skrull, or Mutants. Thank god Squirrel Girl is on our side or we would all be kneeling before our tiny furry Squirrel overlords.
* [[NightmareFuel Don't say army of squirrels]]. They are the one set of our new overlords I, for one, would ''not'' welcome. Rats in fur coats.
** Don't let [[Webcomic/ElGoonishShive Grace]] hear you say that.

[[WMG: Squirrel Girl is the daughter of [[Series/{{Scrubs}} The Janitor]]]]
Undefeatable squirrel army? Mighty fearitude? Please. It's obvious.
* That... That actually makes sense. She's got such an affinity for squirrels because she's training to lead an uprising against her father, for the safety of squirrels everywhere (let's hope she never hears about him trading his squirrel army for a stuffed dog).
** Doesn't quite work--her name's Green, not [[spoiler: Matthews]]
*** And you ''[[ConsummateLiar believed]]'' that?
*** The first thing she and her mom did after moving to hide from The Janitor after he discovered them plotting rebellion was change their names.
* Alternately, she's the daughter of the other [[AlmightyJanitor Janitor]]

[[WMG: Squirrel Girl's using an [[MagicTheGathering infinite loop]].]]
Obviously, she has ''Earthcraft'', ''Squirrel's Nest'', and a ''Forest'' in play.
* That's actually disturbingly plausible

[[WMG: Squirrel Girl's secret is she's a DC character trapped in the MarvelUniverse]]
She's able to do everything she does witha happy-go-lucky outlook on life, is confident, well-adjusted and straightforward, and manages to do it all with no Angst. The excessive Angst typical of Marvel characters, such as Speedball becoming Penance, drives her crazy. If she was in the DC Universe, she'd be utterly unremarkable and typical.
* Actually, this explains why she can't die either. When Marvel and DC do a crossover, they aren't allowed to kill each others characters. So, no matter how deep a hole Marvel puts Squirrel Girl in, she's gonna get out because she's a just a DC guest character.
** She would fit in well with the ComicBook/{{Legion Of Super-Heroes}}...
* Eh, the DCUniverse isn't much brighter than the MarvelUniverse these days (just ask the Franchise/{{Batman}} family). It's ''obvious'' that SquirrelGirl is from the only active comics title with a Golden/Silver Age sensibility -- ''ComicBook/AstroCity.'' She fits in perfectly with characters like Jack-In-The-Box and the Furst Family, and wouldn't be out of place if she joined Honor Guard...
** That's why Batman sent her to the Marvel Universe. 1: If they fought the universe would implode. 2: He doesn't want the competition. 3: He doesn't want the smiles. She could go home but LIKES Marvel better for some reason.
*** Cause Spidey's a barrel of laughs?
**** She's from the Pre-Crisis DC universe.

[[WMG: Squirrel Girl is Doom's next target.]]
The closest thing Doom has to a gimmick is stealing the powers of superbeings (Silver Surfer, Galactus, Beyonder, Haruhi Suzumiya). Doom seeks to steal the power of the being that defeated him with mere squirrels. Surely such power would be the best weapon in his neverending battle against RICHARDS!
* Doom can't steal Haruhi's powers, silly boy. Because Squirrel Girl ''is'' Haruhi! (I know, it's cliched; but what else do you want me to say, that she runs on Spiral Power?)
** Don't be ridiculous. Squirrel Girl doesn't run on Spiral Power. Spiral Power runs on Squirrel Girl.
*** Ouch. Does it leave footprints?
*** No, everyone knows there is no Spiral Power in the Marvel Universe. It's too afraid of Squirrel Girl.
*** In Squirrelian Marvel U., MetaOrigin originates from ''you''

[[WMG: Forcing Squirrel Girl to learn the word "impossible" [[Main/WeaksauceWeakness will rob her of her powers.]]]]
She [[http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b65/Seawolf9/Comics/GLXmaspage6.jpg accidentally blabs about it]] during a battle with MODOK. What do you mean, I'm being too literal?
* [[AchievementsInIgnorance It all makes sense]].
* So her real power is ClapYourHandsIfYouBelieve , she just believes she has squirrel powers, and is too awesome to lose

[[WMG: The Thanos Squirrel Girl defeated was neither a clone, nor the real thing.]]
He was a Skrull. Possibly anal.
* The Watcher confirmed without a doubt that the Thanos she defeated was the true Thanos.
** Except Thanos said he could create clones that could fool even the Wactcher. Also, he's Thanos.
** Meh, what does he know?
*** Where you live.
** Even if the Thanos she defeated WAS a clone that still is an INCREDIBLE defeat considering how powerful he is.

[[WMG: From MightyGodKing: Squirrel Girl is Ratatoskr]]
In essence, Marvel is all about the NorseMythology. Ratatoskr, a squirrel, is a relatively minor figure who relays messages between the top and bottom of [[TheWorldTree Yggdrasil]]. The comment in question isn't too specific, but I think we're supposed to make something of the fact that, despite the 'messages' being primarily insults, Ratatoskr came out of it all okay, without any maiming, or the like.

[[WMG: Squirrel Girl will be directly responsible for undoing One More Day (and much more).]]
In the first page of the CrisisCrossover, {{Deadpool}} will provide Squirrel Girl with information about One More Day, and Squirrel Girl's fangirlish attitude towards real superheroes like SpiderMan will make her furryious, thus she embarks on her quest to defeat Mephisto, whom she defeats in the most epic and breathtaking fight ever shown. The ramifications of this event will affect the Status Quo of the entire MarvelUniverse. Firstly, it will reveal that Peter Parker never sold his soul to the devil, he just divorced Mary Jane and accepted his child with her like any normal, sane, goodhearted person would do. Secondly, it will show that all of ReginaldHudlin's work of ComicBook/BlackPanther will be revealed as a patriotic Wakandian's own deal with Mephisto in a foolish attempt to make Wakanda greater than it was. Thirdly, it will reveal that Norman Osborne and Aunt May, who were both revived during the [[DorkAge Clone Saga]], are really was clones all along, made by none other than Mephisto.
* It will be revealed that [[CreatorsPet the woman that everyone thinks Peter Parker should be dating]] [[TakeThat is in fact an]] EldritchAbomination [[TheManBehindTheMan that is the REAL (in universe) cause of all of Quesada's changes]], and Squirrel Girl will singlehandedly destroy it, thus undoing everything that had happened.
* I was on board with this ''right'' up until the part where Green Goblin is retconned back to dead.


[[WMG:Squirrel Girl has some relation to [[{{Planescape}} the Lady of Pain]]]]
The Lady of Pain and Squirrel Girl are both, mysteriously, more powerful than just about anything else in their respective multiverses. And [[PlanescapeTorment one source]] theorizes the Lady of Pain is six squirrels and a ring of levitation. Obviously this means they're cross-dimensional equivalents or possibly Squirrel Girl is [[CosmicHorror the Lady's daughter]].
* Given that Squirrel Girl can command squirrels, and we are here assuming that the Lady of Pain is, in fact, squirrels, it is more likely that ''Squirrel Girl is TheManBehindTheMan to the Lady Of Pain''. [[ObfuscatingStupidity Obfuscating silliness]]?

[[WMG:Squirrel Girl really is half squirrel.]]
Her mother made up the "mutant" story to hide the shame of the InterspeciesRomance she doesn't like to talk about.
* Actually, it could be him: [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FOig0_3b144]]

[[WMG:Squirrel Girl really is a super powerful meta-human...]]
It's just that she's gotten so sick of [[CrapsackWorld the world that had become such a bleak, dark angsty place]] that she's decided that if she had to save the world, she might as well be a BunnyEarsLawyer and have some fun with it.
* So sort of an Anti-Superboy Prime...?

[[WMG:Squirrel Girl isn't a girl with squirrel-like mutations, she's a squirrel with human-like mutations.]]
Her mother is adoptive.

[[WMG:Squirrel Girl's mutation is a result of her mother eating a radio-active hazelnut during her pregnancy. This is also why Squirrel Girl's lips taste like hazelnuts.]]

[[WMG:Squirrel Girl will be reinvented as a DarkerAndEdgier AntiHero when a sufficiently bad enough writer gets their grimy hands on her.]]
I'm sorry. But given Marvel's track record in recent years, it's inevitable. Soon, SG teams up with ThePunisher. TheyFightCrime.
** It will be still hilarious, but in a [[BlackComedy different way]]...
*** It'd be better if she teamed up with the Punisher, but without any changes to her characterisation.
*** Sure would. Too bad about that.
** Maybe they could do a story where the comic tries to make her darker, and she tries to fight it off like an infection.
*** Oh, so ''that's'' what happened to Forbush Man.

[[WMG:Squirrel Girl's father is ChuckNorris.]]
Because RuleOfCool.
** Of course! And her mother is another MemeticBadass!
*** Her mother is [[Manga/{{Bleach}} Unohana]].

[[WMG: Squirrel Girl's actual power is [[RealityWarper Reality Warping]] to follow the RuleOfFunny]]
So long as she keeps the situation completely ridiculous, she can make anyone her bitch. Since commanding squirrels always makes the fight weird, she can beat DoctorDoom and the like.

[[WMG: Squirrel Girl's power comes from having [[Anime/TengenToppaGurrenLagann Spiral Power]]]]
Because no one else in the Marvel Universe has access to Spiral Energy, she's the most powerful being in it. She also expresses her Spiral Power in a slightly different way, just by being upbeat, cheerful, and genuinely happy, rather than hot-blooded. In other words? She's Nia, but with squirrels.

[[WMG: Thanos [[ActuallyADoombot was lying]].]]
If his duplicates can supposedly fool even the Watcher, he can remain [[ActuallyADoombot tecnically undefeated]] from the point of view of anyone in-universe. Mostly, he just didn't want to admit that he got his butt kicked by a girl with a fluffy tail.
* Confirmed by WordOfGod. Then {{Jossed}}. [[FlipFlopOfGod Then confirmed again. Maybe.]] All of this by the same author.

[[WMG: Squirrel Girl's so powerful because the Marvel Universe runs on the VideoGame/DwarfFortress engine.]]
Someone [[KillerRabbit made the squirrels]] [[MemeticMutation too hardcore]].

[[WMG: There are super-squirrels.]]
She controls these squirrels, and they have the best powers: invincibility, invisibility, creating alcohol, giving people a temporary WeaksauceWeakness...

[[WMG: Squirrel Girl is LightNovel/HaruhiSuzumiya]]

She just doesn't know it yet.

[[WMG: Squirrel Girl was trained by ninja squirrels]]
That's why she's so tough, her squirrel powers are her only powers, it's just that she was trained to use the squirrel version of chakra...wouldn't be surprised if (power wise) she's their {{Naruto}}.

[[WMG: The past incident between Wolverine and Squirrel Girl was]]
One of those fights because of misunderstandings Marvel heroes get into. Squirrel Girl handed Logan the absolute worst beating he's ever had. He doesn't like to remember it, and she feels bad she hurt another hero so badly, so they never want to talk about it.

[[WMG: Squirrel Girl is actually the child of two powerful mutants.]]
It's not her powers themselves that make her so powerful, it's the latent potential hiding in her genes that does it.

[[WMG: Squirrel Girl is a yet unheard of CosmicEntity.]]
She's the Cosmic Entity that embodies Optimism. The reason why Earth-616 is a CrapsackWorld now is because she's abandoned her post/been sealed away. [[UltimateUniverse Earth-1610]] is even worse off because she was killed instead of simply sealed in a human form. Though it could be the reverse-Earth-616 is such a CrapsackWorld that Squirrel Girl(aka Optimism) came into being because the balance between optimism and pessimism was out of wack

[[WMG: DidYouJustPunchOutCthulhu only applies in one-on-one fights]]
If, say, Doctor Doom and Magneto ever attacked her both at once, ''that'' might beat her.

[[WMG: The reason Squirrel Girl can defeat every ultrapowerful supervillain is due to allergies.]]
For reasons unexplained, every villain in the Marvel universe is allergic to squirrel fur. Yes, even Thanos.

[[WMG: Squirrel Girl is a time traveler]]
She's actually a hero from the Silver Age, not the Modern Age.
* ThisExplainsSoMuch

[[WMG: She is S.H.I.E.L.D.s contingency plan for TheSentry]]
I can't think of anyone else who would last, except the Hulk, but he's not as cooperative.

[[WMG: {{Magneto}} will attempt to recruit her into the Brotherhood]]
Y'know, being not only a mutant but also the single most powerful being in the universe.

[[WMG: Squirrel Girl will have a dramatic death for the purposes of Marvel's random Angst Arcs]]
Much alike Pixie's death brought mutant human conflict to a head in Xmen: Destiny. Squirrel Girl will at some point be killed off and carried in the arms of another hero as a way to begin one of Marvel's multiple depressing story arcs. It also may be a potential for a writer to get rid of her from the Marvel Universe because of her Lethal Joke Character status. But it won't stick.
* The sad thing is I can't tell if you're being serious, because that sounds just like something Marvel would do
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