[[WMG: Doug Funnie is an UnreliableNarrator]]
A few things are fact, mainly the important events establishing the point of the series (moving to Bluffington; making friends with Skeeter; being frienemies with Roger; being a StalkerWithACrush in the making with Patti; getting into the music of The Beets, etc). Many of the things are skewed variations of what really happened (the bag a nematoad resolution, how Judy learned to parallel park, the cousin Melvin fiasco) while some things are wishful fantasies written in his journal. (There is no way he'd be hanging out The Beets at the Honker Burger or basketball star Sky Davis asking for Doug's autograph; not to mention everything Porkchop does.)

[[WMG: Doug has a SpiritualSuccessor in {{Futurama}}]]
Not a reincarnation necessarily, but they have a lot more similarities than their respective protagonists being voiced by BillyWest (though there's that, too).

* A BookDumb guy, hopelessly average in everything he does, is implanted into a new environment completely different than the one he's used to (Doug, Fry).
* The name Yancy is a prominent family name (Doug's middle name, Fry's brother's first name)
* He lives with his best friend, a bluish-gray non-human who nonetheless leads a full social life and gets treated almost like a full human (Porkchop, Bender).
* He has a superhero identity (Quailman, Captain Yesterday).
* He develops a crush on the first girl he sees, a girl who outclasses him in everything, but especially athletics. (Patti, Leela).
* The girl's best friend is the daughter of the world's most [[Fiction500 prominent multimillionaire]], but herself is SpoiledSweet and friends with most of the cast (Beebe, Amy Wong).
* Arrogant, smug rival after the love interest of the everyman. (Guy Graham, Zap Brannigan)
* An older mentor character, who's also pretty loaded, and has a high-tech gadget for any occasion (Mr. Dink, Professor Farnsworth).

[[MyFriendsAndZoidberg What About Zoidberg?]]
* Maybe it's Doug's friend Bobby from the Disney series.
** Bobby Bodingo has more in common with Fry's Girlfriend from the 20th Century, mainly due to the whole being from their past and annoying their social circle. Plus, Bobby Bodingo was only in one episode of Doug, where as Zoidberg is more of a buttmonkey that is a regular in Futurama.

[[WMG: Patti and Chalky will end up dating]]
Ever notice how similar they are?
Two people who are athletic, popular, smart, nice, etc. Eventually they'll see how much they have in common with each other. Assuming neither of them gets [[CharacterDerailment derailed]] in the future, they would be happy together.
* They would seem more like just friends or perhaps friends with benefits. Or maybe Patti pits Chalky and Guy (the potential suitor who filled almost the same role as Chalky in the Disney episodes) in a battle of one-upping each other for her affection. This is assuming that the WMG of Chalky being attracted to Doug below is wrong and that Patti isn't into girls herself.

[[WMG: Patti is a lesbian.]]
Short hair, check. Hatred of typically girly things, check. Not caring and/or even getting annoyed with the advances of Doug, Roger, Chalky, and/or Guy, check. More butch than pretty much the rest of Bluffington, check. All that was missing in there was her father stumbling onto his daughter looking at girl on girl porn, and that could've happened at any time after the Disney show ended.
* Peppermint Patty, anyone?

[[WMG: Roger Klotz is gay and has a crush on Doug.]]
Roger picks on Doug and takes interest in him to the point where it's creepy. He makes many [[DoubleEntendre double entendres]] and has his fair share of HoYay moments. He puts on a tough guy facade so people won't make fun of him or figure out his secret.
* Considering that he's developed crushes on girls, he's more likely to be a DepravedBisexual.

[[WMG: Chalky Studebaker is gay and has a crush on Doug.]]
Chalky Studebaker wears a pink and purple letter jacket and in the mess that is his planner (in the episode he cheats on a test) that he is keeping track of tasks, one of the tasks on there was inspect bathroom. Factor this in with the fact that someone who is smarter than Doug having the same test answers as him, and the reason why he had the same answers as Doug on that test become obvious, he's infatuated with the green vest wearing everyman. A way to compare it better is to look at Doug's fantasies and how Patty would always cheer Doug on and observe the reality in each episode and the cheering would always come from Chalky. Doug has an admirer in Chalky the same way he's an admirer of Patty. Doug being oblivious and delusional doesn't pick up on this at all.

[[WMG: Doug's neighbor Bud Dink is a pedophile.]]
For someone who isn't a relative, parent's friend, or teacher, Mr. Dink takes quite an interest in Doug. He doesn't seem to have any adult friends, and in the pilot of the Nickelodeon series he is seen hiding in the bushes with a video camera. He doesn't have any kids of his own, he's the boyscout master, and his name is slang for penis.
* Bluffington must be a haven for sexual predators because Mr. Shalackey (the creepy guidance councilor with the "Hug Me" shirt) gives off these vibes even more than Mr. Dink does. Somebody should let [[ToCatchAPredator Chris Hansen]] know about this.
** I could've sworn that Flounder (The Beets Guitarist) was dating Judy at some point in the Disney series, which puts a member of Doug's favorite band on the registered sex offenders list due to Judy being underage.

[[WMG: Mr. and Mrs. Dink are unable to have children, And Mr.Dink sublimates his desire for fatherhood into his relationship with Doug.]]
You will note Mrs. Dink often steps in when Bud tries to show off his latest purchase to Doug, she knows this isn't healthy and tries to keep them apart yet at the same time realizes that doing so will hurt her husband. Her air of disinterest is due to their mutual disappointment in being unable to conceive. Also, "DINK" is an acronym for "Dual Income, No Kids"; notice how every episode Bud has a new item that is "very expensive".

[[WMG: Mr. Dink is a [[Series/DoctorWho Time Lord]]]]
And his Tardis is [[MemeticMutation the grill that Doug and Skeeter broke]]. Luckily for them, breaking the grill top was merely the equivalent of breaking a window on the door and Mr. Dink could merely press a button to fix it. He did force them to grill for him as punishment because that's what adults do when neighborhood children accidentally break stuff, regardless of whether they're a Doctor or not.

[[WMG: Skeeter has TourettesShitCockSyndrome.]]
His goofy noises are an undiagnosed case of Tourrettes.

[[WMG: In the Doug Universe, blue people are African American.]]
Skeeter is Doug's BlackBestFriend. In a couple other episodes, we see blue people who are basketball stars and people with hairstyles from early 1990s hip hop.
* I thought that Sky Davis (the Basketball Star) had purple skin, like all of the other people with money to spend.

[[WMG: Mr. Bone really does wear pink underwear.]]
He likes wearing pink underwear because he feels that RealMenWearPink Underwear. He also feels that it's nobody's business but his own what type of undies he wears under his trousers so obviously when a bunch of bratty kids are using this for humor and undermining his authority, he's got every damn right to be pissed. This gets even worse when receiving a gift of pink boxers during the school news program where everyone in the whole school is going to see.

[[WMG: Skeeter is the nephew of Michael Winslow from PoliceAcademy.]]
Both are African American and experts at making sound effects with their mouths.

[[WMG: Al and Moo are related to Mr. Dink somehow.]]
They have similar skin tones, they are interested in gadgets (Mr. Dink buys them, Al and Moo make them), and their leitmotifs have similar notes in some respects.
* Al and Moo Sleetch have a light green skin color (similar to Connie Binge), Mr. Dink had purple skin (similar to the Bluffs). Now that doesn't mean they can't have a distant ancestor from the "Settling Betwixed Two Forketh Trees" days.

[[WMG: Doug's friend from the Disney Series, Bobby, has Asperger's Syndrome.]]
The kid lacks social skills, is immature for a twelve year old, and is fixated on comic books.
* Strangely, if you add the unrequited crush, this pretty much describes Doug Funnie.

[[WMG: Doug at one point lived in [[WesternAnimation/{{Arthur}} Elwood City]] prior to living in Bluffington]]
He was stated as being friends at one point with Arthur and Buster by Judy reminding him of this (while stating that Doug had reservations about moving). Yes, it was stated that the Funnies moved from Bloatsburg to Bluffington, but that doesn't rule out the possibility that they've moved more than once. Plus moving from one town to another every few years would be a good explanation for why Doug hates change.

[[WMG: Patti Mayonaise's eating disorder was a long time coming and didn't get resolved in the end of that VerySpecialEpisode]]
Patti has the tragic back story of her mom's death and her father's near death. Factor on top of that her perfectionist tendencies (the episode with Doug's winning streak shows how much of a wreck Patti was when she wasn't the best at everything) and it was a ticking time bomb that was waiting to happen. Also, the issue was going on a lot longer than anyone realized. The episode itself is merely Doug's retelling of what he found out about her. It doesn't show the long hard road to recovery that Patti goes through on the show because everything is told from Doug's point of view.
* Another disturbing element about this is how she learned how to have her eating disorder, she and her friend [[MeaningfulName Connie Binge]] go on a diet. Connie, being the one sent off to fat camp between the Nick and Disney series to lose weight taught Patti how to starve herself and possibly the binge and purge elements of bulimia too.

[[WMG: Boomer Bledsoe started smoking between the Nick series and the Disney series.]]
It would be an in-universe explanation of why he went from sounding like a kid in 6th grade (the Nick series) to sounding like a miserable 75 year old man in the 7th grade (the Disney series) in spite of the fact that the character had the same voice actor throughout both shows. It would also explain why there wasn't an episode based on him in the Disney series like there were for Roger Klotz's other two tag-alongs (Ned's house burning down and Willy getting Ms. Krystal fired), even though it would've been better than yet another episode that veered off into a Quailman fantasy.
* Even a Quailman fantasy could've been used for this story. A villain that looked like Boomer could've been forcing people to turn into smokers like him. He's made Roger into a villain in a Quailman fantasy for less (The time Roger coordinated a surprise party for Doug).

[[WMG: Skunky Beaumont is on some sort of mind altering drugs by the time he's permitted to go to middle school]]
He pleaded insanity when that yodeling trophy was placed in his locker, forcing him to spend all day with that creepy guidance counselor. When he talks to Doug from off screen, he sounded like a nerd. Cue his appearance in the Disney show where he sounds like a stoner. Either he is smoking weed to calm him after that insanity plea's major backfire or he's on some mind altering drugs of sorts that changed the way he talks; whether it's LSD or actual experimental prescription drugs not yet tested by the FDA. The webbed toes he has may suggest the experimental drugs.

[[WMG: Chalky Studebaker grows up to be ComicBook/TheCreeper]]
Both are athletic yellow-skinned green haired people with goofy smiles. All it would take for Chalky to go over the edge into that sort of CreepyGood insanity is being tossed into a vat of chemicals while being doused with laughing gas by another lunatic with green hair. Plus it explains why he isn't incorporated as a hero/villain/anti-hero/anti-villain in any of Doug's Quailman stories, because he is one in real life (also explains why he doesn't have time for studying for tests.)

[[WMG: Doug Funnie eventually grows up to be Edward Norton's character in ''Film/FightClub''.]]
Given that he is socially awkward and tries to conform so he can impress Patti, that failure could result in quite the dark path to Douglas Yancey Funnie. Throw in some of the more odd aspects of how he sees the world (Technicolor people and an anthropomorphic dog that walks on two legs are hardly a normal world view) will set himself up for a crushing soul sucking reality as he gets older. Since he is quite the over imaginitve and high strung individual, creating an alter ego that is cool and cerebral (not unlike how he perceives Quailman to be although better dressed than wearing a towel as a cape) to deal with his terrible life is yet another form of escapism is not too much of a stretch.
* There are plenty of signs that can suggest that that Doug Funnie is [[http://dougfunniesjournal.tumblr.com/ crazy]]

[[WMG: Skeeter's dad is showing early signs of Alzheimer's.]]
He always forgets what he's going to say until someone reminds him, and even forgets his own name. This could be why he has a short temper.

[[WMG: Ned Coffee, one of Roger's goons is a cousin of Doug's.]]
This explains why he doesn't harass Doug like Roger does. He's the only other character in the show who's Caucasian flesh colored. There was the episode where he stays with Doug and it's not mentioned, but he could be a distant cousin on the other side of Doug's dad.
* It seems more likely that the Coffees moved to Bluffington much like Doug's family did, which would explain why Ned's skin color isn't the technicolor that most people born in Bluffington have.

[[WMG: The show takes place in the mid to late 1990s.]]
The first show was released in 1991 and shows technology and fashions of the time, but isn't a total UnintentionalPeriodPiece. In Disney's Doug it is stated to take place around 1996 and they have the internet. The first series could take place around 1994, 1995.

[[WMG: Mrs. Dink had a miscarriage.]]
This explains why Mr. Dink sees Doug as the son he never had and why Mrs. Dink is deadpan and indifferent to the world.

[[WMG: Bluffington has the most polluted water supply in North America]]
This would definitely explain why most of the citizens have skin colors of Blue, Green, Purple, and Orange. The "Lucky Duck Monster" stories and the movie that reveals it exists pretty much makes this canon thanks to the Bluff Corporation dumping toxic waste into Lucky Duck Lake.
* Possibly jossed. Fentruck the Yakastonian exchange student is green. In another episode we see a man who moved from Bloatsburg and he's blue, as well as every movie star and actor.
** Yakastonia sounds like a name for a former part of the Soviet Union and for all we know could border Ukraine near Chernobyl (in universe). As for the man from Bloatsburg, he could've been born in Bluffington and moved to Bloatsburg when he was 11. As for the celebrities; they are known for having unhealthy life styles. Perhaps side effects for Yakastonisian Opium mixed into their drugs.
* The "Nematoad" could also be a product of the Bluff Corporation polluting Bluffington. The fact that it is considered mythical like bigfoot even though the Lucky Duck Monster is real proves two things; one the Bluff Corporation has been getting away with this for a very long time and two they have been able to manipulate the local government with this.

[[WMG: Doug is related to J.D. from Scrubs]]
Both are unathletic daydreamers who have black best friends and develop lasting crushes on blonde female friends. Both also act out their fantasies from time to time oblivious to what is really happening in the world. It's possible that Doug's mom and JD's mom or dad come from the same family making them cousins. Imagine the hell that is a family reunion involving the both of them, especially if the meal being served is lasagna.

[[WMG: Doug's Crush on Patti won't end well]]
Doug's social awkwardness combined with the fact that Patti doesn't seem to have the same feelings towards Doug that he has towards her means that Doug will likely be relegated to the [[http://xkcd.com/513/ friend zone]] at best and at worst it could turn into a case of LoveMakesYouEvil via [[RapeIsASpecialKindOFEvil rape]] as illustrated [[http://www.ebaumsworld.com/pictures/view/153274/ here]].

[[WMG: Doug takes place in the same universe as PepperAnn]]
The two premises are similar, geeky middle schoolers who want to be cool and accepted. The animation styles and character designs are somewhat similar, but going by the theory that Bluffington is polluted, that's why everyone on PepperAnn is normal looking.
* Additionally; other OneSaturdayMorning shows such as ''WesternAnimation/{{Recess}}'', ''TheWeekenders'', and ''WesternAnimation/{{Fillmore}}'' are all part of this universe.
* ''HouseofMouse'' is the nexus point, along with Lilo and stitch that links all the Disney series together.


[[WMG: Doug is the center of a major universe of cartoons]]
Playing a little more with the theory above featuring the OneSaturdayMorning shows being in the same universe, since Doug is also a Nicktoon, it effectively places the Nicktoons and the OneSaturdayMorning shows in the same universe (assuming that the Nicktoons are all one universe) which as a result makes PepperAnn and HeyArnold in the same universe.
* Taking this theory further, RenAndStimpy (and to an extent SpongeBobSquarePants) was shown on both Nickelodeon and MTV, effectively connecting the MTV Animated Shows in this universe, which means that ''WesternAnimation/{{Recess}}'' is in the same CrapsackWorld as BeavisAndButthead.
** Playing a little more with this, a character from the short lived MTV show ''WesternAnimation/{{Downtown}}'' named Goat was also in an episode of ''WesternAnimation/{{Metalocalypse}}''. Now playing with the theory of the MTV universe being part of the same universe as Nicktoons, this character appearing on both shows links AdultSwim shows (and Cartoon Network shows in general) into the same universe; which means that now SuperJail and MoralOrel belong in this universe and since FamilyGuy appears on AdultSwim and Fox; and Futurama has appeared on Fox, AdultSwim, and ComedyCentral; those shows link TheSimpsons and SouthPark respectively into this universe.

[[WMG: Why The Honker Burger Closed Down]]
I think the reason why The Honker Burger closed down is because its customer base was made up almost exclusively of middle school kids, so almost no adults or younger children wanted to go. I wouldn't be surprised if Swirley's suffered the same fate at the end of the Disney series.
* Considering the way Mr. Swirley runs his Ice Cream Factory and his factory that makes Bluff Scout Booster Bars, I'd be surprised if his restaurant passes a health inspection without massive amounts of bribery (and a morally bankrupt health inspector).
* Wasn't the Honker Burger bought up by the former trailer park owner once he got paid money from Mr. Bluff so he can build a new school shaped like his daughter's head.
** It was bought and turned into a French restaurant.

[[WMG: Patti's dad was paralyzed when her mom died.]]
Her mom died in a car accident and he was in the car. He lost the use of his legs in the accident.
* I believe this is canon and was touched upon in the episode where Patti's dad starts dating Ms. Crystal.

[[WMG: Guy Graham is a womanizer and was Typhoid Mary to the Bluffington Mono epidemic]]
Guy is smart, rich, and can get almost any girl he desires (making him the perfect foil for Doug). In addition to that, he is quite the charmer which helps with getting younger girls. The fact that as a middle schooler he contracted Mono (the kissing disease) and gave it to Patti while "rehearsing" for that ludacris play Skeeter came up with says that he was playing the field even then (the other option that Patti was the village bicycle makes Doug even more pathetic). Now imagine what other girls Guy could've been with while doing this:

* Beebe Bluff - Both come from rich families and Mr. Bluff is a mentor of sorts to Guy, giving him plenty of time around Beebe for fooling around.
* Connie Binge - Doesn't appear in many Disney's Doug episodes aside from ones that either involve Patti's girl posse or ones involving music, giving plenty of time to hook up with Guy.
* Sally - Plenty of nights in Newspapers together, though this one seems less likely since Sally was around in the episode where Guy and Patti get Mono and yet she doesn't get sick as well.
* Cassandra Bleem - Popular girl in the same grade as Guy, plus it gives a reason for her to hate Patti in that episode where Doug tries to impress her.
* Muffy Silverson (and by extension the rest of the Junior Daughters club) - Like Beebe, also rich. Plus, that country club lifestyle could include some mingling with Guy.
* Elaine Perigrew - Unlikely but could happen, after all she didn't appear much towards the end of the Disney series.
* Loretta Laqigley - Rich and has a tendency to stretch the truth. Might have given Guy Mono in the first place.

And that doesn't even factor in background characters in the school like the girl that was in Al Sleetch's group of new friends or the girl in that Beets shirt.

[[WMG: Cassandra Bleem isn't the Vile Self-Centered Bitch she was made out to be]]
There is more to her than what was seen in the episode Doug's Older Woman I.E., from [[TheRashomon Doug's point of view]]. This theory does rely heavily on the theory above that Doug is an UnreliableNarrator. About the only things in that episode that were correct was that she was around Doug for a time, she invited him to a party, and she is older than Doug. The rest of it can be questioned including:

* Cassandra laughing and insisting that Doug was funny: Perhaps she was laughing at Doug in a consistent rate because Doug was having fantasies and re-enacting them every time he was around her. After all, he does have a history of doing this, [[FridgeHorror IN TRAFFIC NO LESS]]. This does put [[TheCassandra Cass]][[MeaningfulName andra]] in a new light that she can see how Doug really is and oddly enough was okay with it until...
* The Party itself: There were quite a bit of Geeks and Nerds at this party and there could be some reasons why that is the case. Maybe some of them were there for the sound system (there were some A/V kids there). Maybe Cassandra and her friends think NerdsAreSexy and/or merely GiveGeeksAChance. Maybe Mrs. Bleem had forbid her daughter from inviting the [[AllGirlsWantBadBoys Bad Boys]] and [[JerkJock Jocks]] to said party. Maybe there was a combination of some of these things. Either way, Doug was oblivious to anything wrong until...
* The subject of Patti came up: Cassandra seemed to hate Patti Mayonaise when the subject of Patti came up (whether Patti was at the same park and within distance for this to come up is questionable). This set off Doug to call out Cassandra before he left. What it doesn't take into account is why she could possibly hate Patti. Perhaps she was Guy Graham's girlfriend before he dumped her for a shot at Patti. Perhaps she is to Patti like Roger is to Doug or vice versa. Either way, it wasn't touched up on because Doug has an quite the [[StalkerWithACrush odd]] relationship with Patti and as a result anyone that dislikes Patti (or Patti dislikes) is in his eyes pure evil (The episode with the Junior Daughters Club is proof of this example). What Doug seems to gloss over is the fact that...
* Doug and his friends tried using Doug's brief time around Cassandra as their ticket to popularity: If Cassandra is as bad as she appears from Doug's vantage point after the fact then Doug doesn't understand the meaning of hypocrite. He used Cassandra being interested in him for all that he could until he realized that he hated her. The fact is that Cassandra should've called out Doug for this, however she didn't. This may lead to the idea that Cassandra is actually a lot nicer than given credit or was completely shattered by Doug calling her out.

In the end, Cassandra was the only girl in his relative age group besides Patti that Doug really showed any interest in and unless he only liked her for vain superficial reasons (He only likes blondes or he was using her for her status and nothing more) or is attracted to horrific bitches, she couldn't have been as bad as she was made out to be.

[[WMG: Dirtbike Funnie is going to have a rough life ahead of her]]
Despite the fact that her first name is Cleopatra (which can be shortened to Cleo), everyone refers to her by her middle name of [[WhoNamesTheirKidDude Dirtbike]] (a name that in universe was off of Doug's Christmas list). Sure it may seem [[IncrediblyLamePun Funny]] and perhaps cute to an extent to be calling a baby girl Dirtbike but once she enters grade school all of the other children will pick on her mercilessly. Not to mention what'll happen when she is in high school; which if Doug took place in the mid to late 90's, than Dirtbike will be a teenager right around the time that cyber-bullying via text and facebook started getting national attention (cue crude jokes about her being the "Village Dirtbike"). One would be surprised if Dirtbike didn't turn to drugs or outright suicide to end the life of torment all because her idiot parents mistook her brother's Christmas list in 1996 as a names list and chose the name "Dirtbike" because of her older sister's sarcastic comment about it being an excellent girl's name.
* Or, due to the sheer Irony she'll be the most popular, well adjusted girl at her school, because hipsterism, and just a guess here she'll turn into a total hard-ass butch girl who no one will mess with, fixin up Dirtbikes and become a reality tv show star. both are very possible.
** Based on the description of Dirtbike being well adjusted, popular, and good at most things, it seems like she grows up to be just like Patti Mayonaise (only without baggage of losing her mom, nearly losing her dad, etc...). This could possibly lead to some [[BrotherSisterIncest squicky]] problems with her older brother down the road.
** Considering that Judy has some violent mood swings and issues to the point of having to go to a special school and Doug is already established to be [[http://dougfunniesjournal.tumblr.com/ crazy]], it seems like there is something wrong with the collective genes of Mr. and Mrs. Funnie, or their parenting methods at least are to blame. Either way, their first two kids are messed up and their [[EmbarrassingMiddleName embarrassing middle names]] aren't the names they go by. The cards are stacked against Dirtbike becoming a MarySue though stranger things have happened (especially in Doug's mind).

[[WMG: Skeeter Has A Borderline-Abusive Father]]
His father is angry all the time, he wasn't even aware of his own intelligence until earning a perfect score on that intelligence test, he often downplays his own book smarts despite being revealed to be an excellent student in the Disney version. And, on top of all this, he seems bent on never actually "growing up." Me thinks this guy has some major unresolved daddy issues!

[[WMG: Mr. Dink's inventions are created by [[{{Rugrats}} Stu Pickles]]]]

[[WMG: The Lucky Duck Monster was really a mutated "Nematoad"]]
It originally was a smaller size (more like the size of a dog if that) but in the case of the Lucky Duck Monster, a trip from Stinson's Pond to Lucky Duck Lake messed with it's size to the point that it was a cross between Swamp Thing, a Velocirpator, and the Toxic Avenger.

[[WMG: Judy went to a School for Troubled Teens]]
Judy has quite the high strung personality and a flair for the overdramatic. It could be that she has some deep emotional problems (which could be one of the reasons the family kept moving). If going by the episode where Doug tries to sabotage their float, that school has nothing remotely similar to a regular school. Perhaps this give a glimpse of where Doug will be going to High School in if he continues to act out his fantasies in the middle of class.
* Hell, the name of the school is [[MeaningfulName The Moody School]]!

[[WMG: Theda Funnie is the daughter of a Hoarder]]
Theda Funnie is way too obsessed with trash and recycling in that episode where Doug tried making that horrible monster movie, more so than any normal person would've been. Perhaps the reason why is because she grew up with a hoarder for a mother; this mother being Grandma Opal. The episode where Grandma Opal spends the day with Doug (and gives everyone in the family crappy gifts that they pretend to like) may be a common example of the family dealing with her issues with hoarding (not to mention that she rarely appears in their lives). This makes one think that maybe Doug is estranged from his maternal grandmother due to Theda's trauma growing up with a hoarder for a mom, the zealous attitude towards trash being an outlet for said trauma that has been accumulating since childhood.

[[WMG: Doug Funnie Really does have a cousin Melvin]]
Melvin is the son of one of Theda's bald brothers so Melvin does look a lot like Judy's disguise (aside from the wig color) and was supposed to visit but couldn't due to being sick. The part that was made up about this lie was Melvin staying with the Funnies,which was enough to cascade into the horrible snowball of a lie, mainly due to Doug and Judy being crazy.
* Perhaps the real Melvin lied about being sick just to avoid his insane cousins.