[[quoteright:350:http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/Inquisitor.jpg]]
[[caption-width-right:350:The mighty Inquisitor himself]]

->''Obey! Conform! Abstain! Ignore! Deny! Refrain! Cease! Appease! Shun! Avoid new sensations. Avoid all sensations! Avoid any sensation! Avoid unnecessary pleasantries! Avoid necessary pleasantries! Avoid libation! Avoid fermentation! Avoid all these in combinations. [[HeKnowsAboutTimedHits Save often!]] [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking Floss regularly!]] Floss meaningfully! Floss athletically! And above all, never forget who is the boss of you.'' '''ME! I am the boss of you! ''I'' am the boss of you! I ''am'' the boss of you!'''
-->-- '''Mir Yannick, Grand Inquisitor'''

'''''Zork: Grand Inquisitor''''' is a humorous 3D Point-and-Click AdventureGame, part of the ''VideoGame/{{Zork}}'' series, combining high quality (for 1997) 3D pictures, slightly lower quality animations, and text to describe the ending and the death scenes.

(Full back-story can be found [[http://thezorklibrary.com/theinquisition/zgi_backstory.htm here]], though parts of it conflict with the story in the game.)

About a hundred years before the start of the game, two fellow wizards-in-training, Mir Yannick and Dalboz of Girth became friends. However, while Dalboz was the most powerful and promising wizard in training, Mir was found to suffer from M.D.D. (Magic Deficit Disorder), and flunked out of the school. The two friends had a falling out, as well as Dalboz accidentally casting an immortality spell on them, and they went their separate ways. Dalboz retired to a cottage underground and became extremely bored (yet unable to kill himself), while Mir joined the Zorkastrian Seminary and advanced its ranks. During this time, magic began to decline, aided by Mir's use of the Totemizer, an ancient invention he refurbished, which rather than killing a magical creature or user (and thus allowing their magic to escape back into the environment), it would pulverize them and squish them, sealing them in a tiny token, forever unable to escape without the use of magic.

Dalboz came out of retirement to confront Yannick, but in the ensuing struggle Dalboz was nearly killed, but was transformed into a lantern (which Mir didn't see), and forgotten about.

With magic on the decline and the world in his hands, Mir Yannick ruled the land with an iron fist, using Totemization for the smallest crimes, and banned all magic use, instead forcing everyone to rely completely on technology, which had previously just been a supplement to magic (Zork has a technology level somewhere around WorldWarII. They can harness the power of electricity, and have radio, television, and movies, but don't have the technology for cars, planes, or firearms).

Enter the player, a vacuum salesman from PartsUnknown, who enters Port Foozle moments before curfew, and must find someplace to stay before he's found by Inquisition guards.

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!!This game provides examples of:
* {{AFGNCAAP}}: TropeNamer
* AliensInCardiff: One possible death sequence involves being totemized, tossed through a wormhole, and ending up spending eternity as a piece of litter lying on the side of the Jersey Turnpike.
* AllCrimesAreEqual: Stand around after curfew, and you'll be Totemized. Use magic, and you'll be Totemized. [[TooDumbToLive Climb into the Totemizer machine]] and you'll be Totemized. (Also, the penalty for solving a puzzle incorrectly is almost ''always'' a [[HaveANiceDeath gleefully narrated death.]])
* AlwaysClose: [[AvertedTrope Averted]] when you pour Cola onto Zork Rocks, making them go critical, but played straight when Antharia Jack is always right about to step into the Totemizer when the power goes out.
* AndIMustScream: Getting Totemized definitely falls into this category. And yes, it can happen to the player (although the game mercifully spares you the details of the long-term effects except in text form).
* AscendToAHigherPlaneOfExistence: [[spoiler: Dalboz in the ending. You end up taking over his role as Dungeon Master.]]
* BeneathTheEarth: The Great Underground Empire
* BigNo: Over an uncooperative vending machine.
* BottomlessPits: You don't die, and raise a family with someone else who fell down the bottomless pit. (But it's still a NonstandardGameOver.)
* BreakingTheFourthWall: If you enter the well as soon as you get the rope when you start the game but not the lantern and wait. You hear loud snarling, chomping and then a belch. The game-over text says "You were eaten by a Grue, what was going through your head? A pitch black cave in a Zork game, what did you think was going to happen?"
* {{Calvinball}}: Double Fanucci
* CannedOrdersOverLoudspeaker: You encounter this a few times through the game; fiddling with a loudspeaker in Port Foozle is part of the solution to a puzzle.
* ContinuityNod: One of the {{Cosmic Keystone}}s is kept inside the white house. The one with the mailbox. The Coconut of Quendor was also featured in ''Beyond Zork'', as the perfect container for the knowledge of magic during magic's destruction.
** The Cube of Foundation was the main plot device in the last game in the ''Enchanter'' trilogy, ''Spellbreaker''.
*** Many of the spells in the game first appeared in the ''Enchanter'' trilogy.
** Flood Control Dam #3 features in several earlier ''Zork'' games.
** When the player gets [[spoiler:the door to Dalboz's house]] drunk, he says "Want some rye? Course ya do!" This is an [[CatchPhrase oft-repeated line]] from ''Return to Zork''.
** Scenes from ''[[VideoGame/ZorkNemesis Zork: Nemesis]]'' appear as images on the pillars puzzle at G.U.E. Tech, and there's a reference to Thaddium on the soda machine [[spoiler:(appropriately enough, the time-delayed explosive item shares some similarity with the Irondune breakout puzzle in ''Nemesis'')]].
** The flickering and bickering torches at the white house were first seen in ''VideoGame/ZorkZero''.
** Indeed, the game can be seen as one big ContinuityNod to the earlier ''Zork'' games.
* ControlRoomPuzzle: Two of them, one at the dam and the other in a prison.
* CoolAndUnusualPunishment: The Totemizer
* CosmicKeystone: A Cube of Foundation, the [[TheZerothLawOfTropeExamples Skull of Yoruk]], and the Coconut of Quendor.
* CuttingTheKnot: [[spoiler:That cage surrounded by chessboards? All you have to do is smash it with a wooden plank.]]
** Also, the easy solution to the Hades Shuttle Courtesy Phone is to [[spoiler: cast Kendall, the "Simplify Instructions" spell.]]
** When you face a six-armed invisible guard blocking your way on a rope bridge, [[spoiler: you cut away the bridge, letting him fall to his death. You then build a new bridge using magic.]]
* DiscardAndDraw
* DangerouslyGenreSavvy: The two-headed beast's opening monologue.
--> Let's cut the crap, okay? You got this far, you know the drill: you're the adventurer, [[strike:I'm]] ''we're'' your basic two-headed guardian-of-Hades-type creature. You're looking for treasure, mana, crystals, [[{{Myst}} red pages, blue pages]], whatever. It's all the same, really. The point is: you wanna get by. They always do. And we gotta kill ya. We always do. There's a little banter, a little slaying, chop-chop-chop yada-yada-yada, and then I gotta string your entrails all over the place and make a big mess. [...] Yeah, that's right, pull out the old inventory! ''Something's'' gotta work!
* DoesThisRemindYouOfAnything: The Flickering Torch's flicker and psychological ailment.
* {{Expy}}: Antharia Jack is an Franchise/IndianaJones type. Subverted, in that he's a sissy.
* FascistsBedTime: Curfew starts ''seconds'' after the game begins.
* FeaturelessProtagonist: [[Administrivia/RenamedTropes Former]] TropeNamer: it was once called AFGNCAAP.
* FMinusMinus: Apparently, Mir Yannick's overall grade at G.U.E. Tech was a ''Z minus''. That's a record, even for this trope.
* ForgottenSuperweapon: Lampshaded, as Dalboz points out a certain spell you've had since the beginning that would be ''really'' useful for finishing the game.
* ForInconveniencePressOne: Part of a puzzle to summon Charon and cross into Hades.
* GlobalCurrency: Zorkmids
* GoofyPrintUnderwear: Antharia Jack strips himself down to his heart-print boxers in a game of Strip [[RockPaperScissors Grue Fire Water]].
* {{Hammerspace}}: The vacuum, [[LampshadeHanging lampshaded]] by Dalboz. When the player puts a large vacuum on a vending machine, he comments "Just where were you keeping that?"
* HaveANiceDeath
* {{Hypocrite}}: After running his entire regime persecuting and stamping down magic in favor of technology, the Grand Inquisitor succumbs to the temptation of the Coconut of Quendor's magic. [[spoiler:This gets him killed.]]
* KleptomaniacHero
-->'''Lucy Flathead''': Ahh, the Adventurer's Creed. Steal anything that isn't nailed down, even if it's a federal offence.
* LaResistance
* LotteryOfDoom: In the form of a multiple-choice scratcher ticket that ''immediately transports your soul to Hell'' if you choose incorrectly.
* MythologyGag (dozens of them, all from the ''Zork'' and ''Enchanter'' games)
** The HaveANiceDeath screen and summation is a MythologyGag to the text adventure format of the originals.
* NinjaButterfly: Dalboz
* PaintingTheMedium: When playing other characters or impersonating other creatures with magic, your view changes according to how they would see
* PlotTailoredToTheParty
* PsychicPowers: Lucy Flathead's telepathy
* ReadTheFreakingManual: Early on in the game, there is a glass case with a sword, a map and a hammer that reads 'In Case of Adventure, Break Glass.' You can open the case to take out the hammer, but you cannot remove the sword or the map until you close the case and smash the glass cover with the hammer.
* ReadingYourRights
-->'''Wartle''': Go ahead and read him his rights.\\
'''Inquisition Guard''': ''(opens tiny book and reads)'' You have no rights.
* RockPaperScissors: "Grue Fire Water."
* SchizoTech
* SharingABody: The Hades beast, with two heads on one body.
** After sending the Griff through a Time Tunnel, he'll start to complain about what you're making him do (stealing mail, touching a dragon's tooth, etc.). Is the AFGNCAAP sharing his body, or is it just a case of [[BreakingTheFourthWall Breaking the Fourth Wall]]?.
* ShoutOut: The Coconut of Quendor is an apparent parody of the Amulet of Yendor, the MacGuffin from ''VideoGame/{{Rogue}}'' (and subsequently ''{{Nethack}}'').
** Two types of things the Hades beast assumes you're looking for are [[{{Myst}} red pages and blue pages]].
*** If you try to gain entrance to the tavern whilst playing as Griff, you'll occasionally get;
-->'''Floyd:''' We don't serve your kind here\\
'''Griff:''' Okay then. [[Franchise/StarWars I'll just wait out here with the droids.]]
** Near the start of the game, there's a computer in Antharia Jack's store showing a screen from the text adventure game ''VideoGame/{{Planetfall}}''.
** In the endgame, an off-screen guard says "[[WesternAnimation/SouthPark Oh my god]], {{they killed Kenny|Again}}!"
* SpeakFriendAndEnter
* SpiderSense: Dalboz and your [[TheLordOfTheRings glowing sword]]
* TeleportersAndTransporters
* TheCoronerDothProtestTooMuch: The previous Inquisitor "Tripped on the rug and accidentally strangled himself".
* TheManyDeathsOfYou
* TimeyWimeyBall: At one point near the end of the game, Lucy Flathead time travels back to Port Foozle before the Inquisition took over, and ends up playing a game of Strip [[RockPaperScissors Grue Fire Water]] with Antharia Jack. If you lose, Lucy would run out of Jack's house in a panic and hide in a nearby building, where she eventually becomes the unseen fish merchant that you had to take a can of Mead Lite from at the beginning of the game.
* ToHellAndBack
* HoldYourHippogriffs: "Sweet Yoruk!" and "Holy Hungus!"
* {{Unwinnable}}: At one point in the game, the Griff gets the Coconut of Quendor from within the mouth of a dragon, but then someone in the dragon's stomach says that he needs a coconut to make a piina colada and tosses you rope for you to tie to a tooth. If you decide to drop the Coconut of Quendor down the dragon's throat instead to appease the guy, the Griff will comment, "Somehow I don't think that was its intended usage."
* WhoWantsToLiveForever: Dalboz tries to kill himself in many ways, but cannot because of his immortality spell.
* WrongGenreSavvy: Upon defeating the Six-Armed Invisible Guard, Dalboz will inform you that "You gain 86 experience points and found a healing potion," before realising that he's being the [[DungeonsAndDragons wrong kind of Dungeon Master]].

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