''Toss The Turtle'' is an online game that is almost ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin. You shoot a turtle out of a cannon and pepper him with bullets in the hope of getting major distance. Along the way, you can grab cash for upgrades at the shop and ammo for the gun to continue shooting the poor turtle.

Also, the land is littered with [[SpikesOfDoom spikes]], [[TheGoomba goombas]], bombs, [[FunnyAnimal gangster hounds]], angry suns, [[PlayingWithFire flame dudes]], small and big birds, bananas, cars, [=UFOs=], chainsaw-wielding maniacs, and angry ground creatures. That pretty much makes it a [[WidgetSeries Weird and Hilarious American Thing]].

You can find it on {{Newgrounds}} [[http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/508440 here]]. The artist, Gonzo, has also gone on to create art for another game, ''Goin' Up''.
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!Tropes:
* AmusingInjuries
* BlingBlingBang: The Golden Gun, probably the best out of all your weapons.
* BloodyHilarious
* CatchPhrase: [[StreetFighter SHORYUKEN!]]
* CollisionDamage
* CosmeticAward: Several. Some of them, however, actually increase your effectiveness in torturing the turtle.
* DepthDeception: You can collide with the sun without even ''leaving the atmosphere''.
* DeusExNukina: You can buy several nukes to bolster your speed and height.
* EquipmentBasedProgression: The game has this as the main game mechanic. The farther you launch the projectile the more money is available for upgrades, and each upgrade helps you go further, and so on ad infinitum.
* EverythingsBetterWithSpinning
* {{Expy}} - That Squirtle, I mean, turtle sure [[{{Pokemon}} looks familiar]].
** Also the [[strike:Diglett]] angry ground creature.
* FunnyAnimal: The gangster hounds.
* TheGoomba
* [[InfinityPlusOneSword Infinity Plus One Items]]: The Newgrounds Tank and the Golden Gun. With both of these weapons, you can easily breach the 100-mile mark.
* JustOneMoreLevel: There's an achievement for that.
** Three of them!
* LethalJokeWeapon: That banana gives you the biggest boost out of anything you could possibly hit.
* MadeOfIron: It doesn't matter how much abuse the turtle goes through, he just sits up and breaths a sigh of relief when he comes to a stop. And even if you hit the spikes, he's still up and about, none the worse for wear.
* MoreDakka: You buy increasingly more powerful tanks and guns over the course of the game.
* {{Pun}}: "Get shot up" says the achievement for landing in the gunfire of a ganster dog and being propelled upward.
* {{Shoryuken}}: The banana performs this maneuver if you so much as touch him.
* ShoutOut: Several, to ''SuperMarioBros.'', ''StreetFighter'' and perhaps Newgrounds' own revered characters.
** And the bonus modifier for somehow not hitting any objects is "[[VinceOffer Boring Life]]".
** In some stages there are the remains of ''VideoGame/MetalGearSolid'''s cyborg ninja on the ground.
** The title image, with the turtle on a cliff looking at a distant city, is reminiscent of ''NinjaGaiden''.
** And the title theme is taken directly from ''{{Contra}}.''
** One of the enemies is a [[SuperMarioBros Goomba]] wearing a [[HighClassGlass top hat and monocle]]. Stomping only one of these gets you the bonus modifier "[[MemeticMutation Weegee]]".
* SpikesOfDoom: This particular variety stops you instantly, unless you have a chest bomb on.
* StandardFPSGuns: With a slingshot as your [[WithThisHerring starter weapon]].
* TurtlePower
* VideoGameCaringPotential-You can guide the turtle to a safe landing and end his suffering...
* VideoGameCrueltyPotential-...After launching the poor shmuck out of a cannon and shooting at him.
* [[WidgetSeries Weird and Hilarious American Thing]]
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