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->''"Goat Simulator is a small, broken and stupid game. It was made in a couple of weeks so don’t expect a game in the size and scope of [[VideoGame/GrandTheftAuto GTA]] with goats. In fact, you’re better off not expecting anything at all actually. To be completely honest, it would be best if you’d spend your $10 on a hula hoop, a pile of bricks, or maybe a real-life goat."''
-->--'''Coffee Stain Studios'''

Pretty much ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin: ''Goat Simulator'' is a simulator game in which you play as a goat. Originally a silly experiment done internally by Creator/CoffeeStainStudios, but it unexpectedly gathered interest from gamers. ''Goat Simulator'' is a treasure trove of deliberately broken physics and silliness.

Several additional areas have been added or released as DLC:
* ''Goatville'' - the original area.
* ''Goat City Bay'' - added with the multiplayer patch.
* ''Goat MMO Simulator'' - a free update with an area largely satirising ''World of Warcraft''
* ''[=GoatZ=]'' - a ZombieApocalypse themed area that incorporates (bizarre) weapon crafting and (obnoxious) survival mechanics.
* ''Goat Simulator: PAYDAY'' - a desert area themed after ''VideoGame/Payday2'', right down to having several assets directly incorporated.
* ''Waste of Space'' - a sci-fi themed area with an overarching mockery of Kickstarter built in.

Buy it [[http://www.goat-simulator.com/ here]] or on Platform/{{Steam}} [[http://store.steampowered.com/app/265930 here.]] An Platform/XboxOne version was released in 2015, a [=PS4=] version was released in 2016, and a Platform/NintendoSwitch release in 2019. A sequel, ''VideoGame/GoatSimulator3'', was announced at Summer Games Fest 2022 and was released in November 2022 on the Platform/XboxSeriesXAndS, Platform/PlayStation5, and on PC via Epic Games Store.

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!!Provides examples of:

* AbsurdlyHighLevelCap: ''Goat MMO Simulator'' has a level cap of 101. This is pretty difficult to reach without exploiting Angel Goat. Leveling up does nothing, but you get an achievement for reaching it.
* ActionBomb: Microwave Goat's special ability makes it explode, ragdolling the microwave and knocking over anything close by.
* AdjustableCensorship: You can opt to turn off adult elements in the game. For example, the "No penis-shaped food" protest signs will change to read "No pointy food". Averted in the mobile and console versions, however, where the censorship cannot be disabled.
* AlienAbduction: You can trigger one on the Goatville map. You get stranded in space until you choose to respawn.
* AnimateInanimateObject:
** Shopping Goat, a shopping cart.
** ''Goat MMO Simulator'' has Microwave Goat, a microwave on legs.
** ''Goat Payday'' has a small bag stall near the drive-in cinema with a box that will transform your character into a black duffel bag if they run into the floating bag in the box.
* AntiFrustrationFeatures:
** Given the many hilarious ways you might get yourself stuck, there's a handy respawn option that drops you back at the spawn point.
** Averted with ''Goat MMO'' and ''Goat Payday'', where you cannot respawn back into the main world once you are trapped on the treasure dimension and moon respectively (the latter being worse as all four crew members will appear on the moon, regardless if they were on the pirate ship or not).
* ArtisticLicensePhysics: One of the first things you'll notice about the game, as shown in the page image. The game is not just a simulation on how to play like a goat on the streets, but the hilarity that comes with it. How did they manage to incorporate such level of comedy? By breaking several laws of physics and making ragdolls out of anything mobile, so as long as it doesn't crash the game outright.
* AscendedGlitch: WordOfGod says that the only bugs that will be fixed are the crash bugs. Everything else, particularly the variety that involves the physics engine doing weird things, will be kept in [[RuleOfFunny because it's funny]]. The boxed version even boasts that it has "More bugs than any other game!"
* AwesomeMomentOfCrowning: [[spoiler: Becoming King[=/=]Queen of the Goats. Which coincidentally confers the power to make it rain goats.]]
* AwesomenessMeter: You can get points for stuff like making things explode, crashing parties, and doing 360 flips.
* BilingualBonus: The traffic signs above the road tunnels in the first map are written in Swedish. They translate into "Heaven" and "Hell", respectively.
* BlatantLies: Much like ''VideoGame/SurgeonSimulator2013'', the veracity of this simulation is questionable, to say the least.
* BlowYouAway: Finding the Wind Statue on the beach map and returning it to the Wind Altar gives you the power to create localized tornadoes.
* BodyHorror:
** The physics in this game can result in some fairly disturbing-looking positions for anyone involved. Walk up any ladder and watch the goat's head twist in all sorts of unnatural ways. [[spoiler: The Demon Goat power activates a black hole in front of your goat that can inflict this on other objects and people.]]
** Combine two or more goats when at least one isn't just a cosmetic change. For example, [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZhuJEF_hV_M Space Goat and Ripped Goat.]] The June 2014 update actually added this example as Slendergoat on the beach map.
* {{Bowdlerise}}: The console ports changed dialogue to remove uses of the F word.
* BreathWeapon: How the zombie virus is spread, and also your special ability in ''[=GoatZ=]''.
* CallASmeerpARabbit: The various "goats":
** Ripped Goat: [[spoiler:A muscular goat]]
** Tall Goat: [[spoiler:A giraffe]]
** Feather Goat: [[spoiler:An ostrich]]
** Giant Goat: [[spoiler:A whale]]
** Classy Goat: [[spoiler:A penguin]]
** Old Goat: [[spoiler:A T. rex]]
** Mermaid Goat: [[spoiler:A fish with legs]]
** Snail Goat: [[spoiler:An elf from Goat MMO Simulator performing an imitation of its namesake]]
* CircleOfStandingStones: Goathenge. Destroying it is a unique action worth more points than normal.
* {{Combos}}: Like a skateboarding game, you get points for doing flips and spins. Hilariously, the "combo counter" doesn't settle for boring double, triple, and quadruple. Using various tricks, it's possible to go right past real numbers and into Integer Overflow numbers, which when done enough can actually net the Hard level high score achievement ''in a single combo''. In fact, if you go too far, it is possible to achieve a '''literal''' integer overflow and do a combo so insanely high that the score resets to 1.
* CoolMask:
** You can earn these by completing some of the objectives, such as [[spoiler: going to the Goat Castle and proclaiming yourself [[AwesomeMomentOfCrowning King/Queen of All Goats]] by sitting on the throne]].
** You can purchase different masks from BAA Machines and wear said masks on top of the Payday crew masks in Goat Payday. One achievement requires you to purchase and wear 30 masks at once.
* CreatorCameo:
** Almost all of the NPC models found in Goatville and Goat City Bay are named after the developers, with ''[=GoatZ=]'' adding the Gone North Games developers to the roster.
** Coffee Stain Studios is an actual building in the map, and you get an achievement for finding it and going inside. [[RecursiveReality You'll find the developers working]] on ''Goat Simulator''.
** You can find this house again in ''[=GoatZ=]'', now shared with the DLC's creator Gone North Games. Inside you can find a developer weeping at a large screen as negative reviews for the game are displayed.
*** On the other hand, [[spoiler:you can find the developers again on an island separate from the mainland partying it up like there's no tomorrow, complete with music, a money cannon, a wine paddle pool, a giant gold goat statue and a stripper cage where the developer inside it performs a very convincing Snoop Dogg impression.]]
** A Prank in Goat Payday involves you [[spoiler:using a drillcopter to save a dev from the prison. You complete the mission by returning the dev to the other developers, who can be found in the casino showering a gold goat statue with money]].
* DealWithTheDevil: [[spoiler:You can sacrifice five humans or goats to the Blood Goat to become Devil Goat. You can also sacrifice the [[VideoGame/{{Sanctum}} two Walker statues and the G-2 robot]] to become Sanctum Goat.]]
* DefeatMeansPlayable: After completing the quest to vanquish Old Goat, you unlock it as a Mutator. [[spoiler:Of course, [[ZeroEffortBoss "defeat" is probably a strong word here...]]]]
* DevelopersForesight: It's possible to destroy the hang glider by licking the Boulder of Death and dragging it to the top of the crane. Doing so will net the message "How? Seriously, how did you manage that?"
* DevelopersRoom:
** In ''Goat MMO Simulator'', [[spoiler:you can find the game's servers in a hidden room. Hitting them repeatedly messes up the graphics, starting with the textures failing, and then everything becoming wireframe and removing the status displays, until eventually the player is booted from the game]]. You get an achievement for it.
%%** See CreatorCameo above.
* DieChairDie: There are very few things in this game you can't headbutt for points. Pretty much anything not nailed down is fair game.
* DonutMessWithACop: The police station's sign in ''Goat Payday'' is a giant doughnut like the one at Randy's Donuts painted white with a blue band and letters.
* DoubleJump: The [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin Double Jump]] mutation allows the player to jump a second time in mid-air.
* EpisodeOfTheDead: ''[=GoatZ=]'' is a dedicated episode about the ZombieApocalypse which also parodies titles like ''VideoGame/Left4Dead'' and ''VideoGame/DeadIsland''.
* EscortMission: Parodied in ''Goat MMO Simulator'', where one quest is to escort a ''painfully'' slow moving man halfway across the map. The intended solution is just to grab him with your tongue.
* EveryCarIsAPinto: Parked cars will blow up if force is applied to them, whether from you headbutting them or something else hitting them at a high enough speed. Moving cars and cars found in the Goat Payday map, on the other hand, are [[MadeOfIndestructium the opposite]].
* EverythingsDeaderWithZombies: The DLC ''[[VideoGame/DayZ GoatZ]]''. Also a TakeThat as it prominently advertises itself as the "First Survival Game Not in Early Access".
* ExtremeOmniGoat: One of the in-game mods lets you play as this as a [[VideoGame/YoshisIsland Yoshi]] parody.
* {{Facepalm}}: Human {{Non Player Character}}s tend to do this in response to you making a ruckus if they don't run away or fall over.
* FetchQuest: Most of the quests in ''Goat MMO Simulator'' are some variation of "Find x."
* FlyingSaucer: There's a flying saucer in ''Goat Payday'' that abducts various protesters that stand on alien markings on the ground... as well as clip though buildings.
* ForegoneVictory: It's basically impossible to die in ''Goat MMO Simulator'', since nothing can actually hurt you, just repel at most. As such, you can accomplish quests at your leisure.
* GoingThroughTheMotions: There is only one short animation loop for dancing. Finding a big crowd doing the same dance move over and over again, perfectly synched with one another to boot, is both hilarious and slightly unnerving.
* GroundPound: Tank Goat's special ability makes him pound the ground, damaging anything nearby.
* HappyCircusMusic: In Cabrito Park, the AmusementPark in Goat City Bay, [[https://youtu.be/446fEajOVO8 a traditional-sounding carnival waltz tune]] plays. The song sounds slightly off-key, fitting the game's StylisticSuck nature.
* HellIsThatNoise: The dragon cry from the Goatborn setting will destroy your ears the first time you hear it. And that's before you [[ButtonMashing start spamming it]]. Said dragon cry occasionally plays in place of a regular "baa" even when not using Goatborn.
* HitboxDissonance: In line with the intentional brokenness of the rest of the game, the player character in ''Flappy Goat'' has an extremely unforgiving hitbox in which even if you come within two pixels from an obstacle, you'll still lose.
* HookersAndBlow:
** On the beach map, it's possible to find a house with a pile of "sugar" neatly cut into a line. Licking it increases the game speed for 30 seconds or so.
** You can find an [[Series/BreakingBad an RV and three blue barrels]] on the [=GoatZ=] map. Delivering all three barrels to the RV will cause small piles of crystal meth to pop up all over the map. Licking one of these piles will give you the ''Crystal Breath'' ability, allowing you to freeze {{Non Player Character}}s in front of you for a short time, turning them into breakable ice sculptures.
* HorseOfADifferentColor: You can get people to ride you with by jumping onto the bucking bull ride in the Goat City Bay map.
* InvoluntaryDance: [[Music/Deadmau5 Deadgoa7]]'s active power forces everyone in the area to dance, even when they're aflame or fleeing in terror.
* JetPack: You can pick up a jet pack on the city map. You cannot, however, control your flight. There's also Rocket-Skate Goat. In this case, your legs just bounce around in every direction and it does absolutely nothing. You can even walk around.
* JokeCharacter:
** Giant Goat. [[spoiler:Understandably, a beached whale is a bit difficult to move around.]]
** Shopping Goat. [[spoiler:A shopping cart is easier to move around, and can even jump, but it's an inanimate object that can't headbutt.]]
** The Microwave class in the MMO update. It has all the abilities of a normal goat, but moves slower and its special abilities aren't all that great.
* {{Knockback}}: As part of the messed-up physics, a lot of things will cause your goat to go flying across the map.
* LadderPhysics: Goats climb ladders by spastically spinning their head and tongue around while walking through the air by the ladder.
* LightningBruiser: Classy Goat (a penguin) is the slowest goat when walking, but has the fastest running speed in the game.
* MadeOfIron: The player goat as well as all [=NPCs=] can get blown back by an explosion, hit by a car, fall hundreds of meters from the air, and the like, and the worst that will happen is that go into {{ragdoll|Physics}} mode (which can be undone for the player by pressing Q or moving) or respawn due to falling into the void below the map.
%%* {{Mordor}}: Old Goat Mountain in ''Goat MMO Simulator''.
* MovesetClone: Almost all of the "[x] Goat" Mutators change the species of the player character, but don't fundamentally alter the playstyle, though some have different physics or other properties to make them feel more distinct, such as Feather Goat's floatier physics.
* MushroomSamba: The beach map has mushrooms you can eat by licking. Doing so causes parts of the goat's head to enlarge. You have to put down a few of them to get the full effect, or else it will only enlarge an ear.
* NoFairCheating: While the slowdown feature slows everything down, including the music, it does ''not'' slow down ''Flappy Goat''.
* NotQuiteFlight:
** Angel Goat reduces gravity to a fraction of normal as long as its power is active. You can leap off the tallest building in the game and land with the grace of a cat. This makes getting absurd combos hilariously easy, and is great for general travel. The Flappy Goat mutator has a similar effect, giving the goat wings which grant a glide ability. Combining them is the closest thing to actual flight the game has.
** The MMO update adds in the anti-gravity mutator, which brings it even closer. However, it doesn't turn gravity off completely, but reduces it to a small fraction of normal. Your distances are greatly improved (far larger than the map's area), but turning in midair is hard and your goat will eventually start falling. Combining Anti-Gravity with the Tank's charge attack allows faster travel, and can be quite effective if you still have quests to complete.
** Fully averted in the ''Goat Payday'' DLC. one of the crew members you can play as is Valentino Salami, a flamingo capable of true flight.
* OurZombiesAreDifferent:
** Apparently, animals like goats, giraffes, penguins and even elephants are also highly susceptible to the zombie virus. The zombie goats can be difficult to escape due to their high speed and ramming abilities.
** Unique [=NPCs=] including The Governor and fortune teller will have a different appearance when zombified.
** If you survive for long enough, you can encounter the stronger, crimson Dead Ghost zombie varieties.
%%** {{Raising the Steaks}}
* OverlyLongTongue: Licking something causes the goat's tongue to stuck to it... and stretch to freakishly long distances if that thing gets stuck somewhere, or gets hit by a car.
* RagdollPhysics: Knocking over human characters will cause them to flop to the ground in a very strange way. Your goat will do this too -- in fact you can get it to "ragdoll" on command by pressing a button, which is actually vital to getting one of the trophies and one of the achievements.
* RaidersOfTheLostParody: The Boulder of Death, which is the only object in the game that can destroy moving cars.
* RewardingVandalism: You get points and achievements for breaking stuff.
* RougeAnglesOfSatin: Sent up with the MMO update's Rouge class, which uses a variety of makeup without being seen. Yes, it's actually spelled "rouge".
* RuleOfFunny: Why are the physics so messed up? Why can you lick things and then drag them around with your tongue? Why are there trampolines at the bottom of an empty swimming pool? This is why. The creators have outright admitted this: one of the key features on the Platform/{{Steam}} store page is "MILLIONS OF BUGS!", with the disclaimer that anything that doesn't crash the game is "hilarious and we're keeping it". You even get an achievement for crashing the game.
* ScoringPoints: The "goal" of the game is to complete objectives and earn points. Some of these objectives are given to you, most you have to find for yourself. Some of the basic ways to earn points are by destroying things, jumping over things, or licking things.
* StuffBlowingUp: Some things explode when you run into them. Also how you get the Creator/MichaelBay achievement, by [[spoiler: blowing up the gas station]].
* StylisticSuck: Could easily be called ''Stylistic Suck: The Game''. It's a [[MundaneMadeAwesome mediocre premise]] in a game that's intentionally filled to the brim with glitches and terrible ragdoll physics[[note]]The developers explicitly note in the game's store description that they only ever bother to fix crash-bugs, since [[GoodBadBugs everything else is funny]].[[/note]]. It's essentially if someone made a terrible VideoGame/GarrysMod video into a playable game.
* SuperStrength: Ripped Goat comes with a massive increase to headbutt power. The one you fight can headbutt you high into the air.
* SuspiciouslySpecificDenial: In ''Payday'' you can find a sign reading "Selling totally not stolen stuff"
* SyntheticVoiceActor: The chat has the same text-to-speech chat as VideoGame/MoonbaseAlpha.
* TakeThat:
** The achievement for reaching level 101 in MMO is titled "Better than ''[[VideoGame/WorldOfWarcraft Warlords of]] [[{{VideoGame/DungeonsOfDredmor}} Dredmor]]''". The first of the two games referenced has a level cap of 100, one lower than ''Goat MMO Simulator''.
** ''Waste of Space'' contains a lot of thinly-veiled satire toward {{Website/Kickstarter}} through "Crowdkicker"; beyond the CEO of the company being named "Lawrence [[PunnyName S. Windle]]" and many of the ultimately pointless stretch goals, one of the denizens' random commentary is "''VideoGame/StarCitizen'' took all my money!".
* TeenageMutantSamuraiWombats: {{Parodied}}. You can find the "Creator/MichaelBay [[ToiletHumor Turdles]]" hanging out in a sewer in Goat City Bay. On the console edition, they look like normal humans wearing green tracksuits and bandanas, but in the PC and mobile versions they much more closely resemble the original Ninja Turtles, except with the head of Franchise/{{Shrek}}.
* TooDumbToLive: Most of the humans in ''[=GoatZ=]'' go about their daily activities, you know, as if there wasn't a mass Zombie outbreak.
* UnlockableContent: Collecting trophies and completing certain in-game events unlock new goat skins (some are applied immediately, others can be activated in a Custom Game). These include Tall Goat ([[spoiler:a giraffe]]), Feather Goat ([[spoiler:an ostrich]]), Giant Goat ([[spoiler:a whale]]), and many more.
* VideoGameCrueltyPotential: You're a goat, who cares about those pesky humans? Kick them off buildings, into traffic, and set them on fire! You can even mistreat your goat, like throwing it into traffic and have it smushed by a truck (though nothing can kill you, just hop out of ragdoll mode once you're done playing roadkill). You can also lick things in motion and be dragged along limply.
* VillainProtagonist: The goat can beat up innocent civilians, destroy stuff, and [[spoiler: participate in a Satanic ritual]], among other things.
* ViolationOfCommonSense: Getting hit by cars and licking random things gives you points! It's even an in-game goal.
* WalkingDisasterArea: Repulsive Goat's ability emits a stench which is literally repulsive; anything that gets near/touches the goat is instantly repelled, assuming it is an object the goat would be capable of moving. Intact and moving cars aren't affected, instead causing the goat to ragdoll and stretch from the interaction.
* WallCrawl: One of the new features in ''Goat Payday'' and it's pretty much the only way to escape the police jail (read: pit where police throw criminals). It should be stated that you don't climb ''just'' walls either, you can climb '''everything''' whether you like it or not.
* WallJump: Added with the June 2014 update, you simply jump in the middle of a WallRun.
* WallRun: A new feature added with the June 2014 update. By running and then jumping at a wall, the goat will run up the wall for a brief period. If there's another nearby wall, you can jump to that wall and keep running. Angel Goat can scale a sheer wall through its hover ability.
* WavingSignsAround: The group of people protesting against penis-shaped foods in ''Goat Payday''.
* YouKillItYouBoughtIt: Beating Ripped Goat in the Goat Fight Club turns you into Ripped Goat, [[spoiler: a sheep.]]
* ZombieApocalypse: The entire premise of [=GoatZ's=] "After".
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