* 90 percent of the people who heard this story were not helped by it at all.
** The remaining ten percent were dead.
*** But then again, so was everyone.
* AuthorAppeal: Patrick lives underwater - that's probably why he chose a barnacle as the ugly character.
* HeyItsThatVoice: The story was narrated by none other than [[SpongebobSquarepants Patrick Star]].
* WhatCouldHaveBeen: The Ugly Barnacle was scheduled to make a guest appearance in the short story Fanfic/GarfieldInAlongCameASplut, but cancelled at the 11th hour due to his crew dying because of his ugliness.
* WritingByTheSeatOfYourPants: Patrick literally came up with the story on the spot, simply so he could help SpongeBob. Too bad it didn't help at all.