!! Half-Way Horrible

[[quoteright:350:https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/half_way_horrible.jpg]]
[[caption-width-right:350:Someone's got the wrong idea about severance pay.]]

-> (''the Crypt has been turned into a beauty salon; the Crypt Keeper, wearing an earring and a leopard skin outfit with matching bandanna, checks up on a woman under a hair dryer, discovering that her head has shrunken from to the intense heat'')\\
'''Crypt Keeper:''' (''in a feminine voice'') Ooooh! I just love how your hair has ''groan'' out! A little ''scream'' rinse and conditioner, and it'll look fa-''boo!'' If you don't look dead, ''we'' don't look dead. (''to the camera'') Oh, hello kiddies! You're right on time for your appointment. (''in his regular voice'') You know, it was always one of my ''ghouls'' in death to open my own ''scare'' salon. Now, let’s see... a few ''shrieks'' in your hair would look good. A ''boo''-faunt would look even better! Or maybe you'd like to try tonight's ''die''-fashion statement. It's a nasty nugget that asks the question, ''zombie'' or not ''zombie''. I call it: '''Half-Way Horrible.'''

Roger Lassen (Creator/ClancyBrown), the president of a highly successful chemical company, is called to the city morgue to identify a body. The corpse turns out to be that of Dan King (Creator/CostasMandylor), the co-founder of Roger's company, having been killed with a massive injection of Exthion-B, the company's newest, longest-acting preservative. The police have found a note in Dan's coat pocket which reads "I have not forgotten or forgiven", as well as a photo in his apartment of him, Roger, and their friends Kevin and Alex (Brian Wimmer and Creator/JonTenney). The photo is found to have been taken during an illegal business trip to Brazil six years ago, during which Alex died.

While in Brazil, the men met with a native tribe and participated in a ritual human sacrifice, in which said sacrifice drank an herbal formula and was buried alive. Roger had quelled the others' objections to the scene by saying every person has an evil side, and that the trick is to keep it under control. Roger had also secretly made a deal with the tribe to sacrifice Alex's in exchange for the herbal formula, which his company eventually developed into Exthion-B. In the present day, Roger returns to his apartment and finds the message from Dan's note spray-painted on the wall. A voodoo doll of Roger also rests on a table among his collection of tribal artifacts, one half of the doll showing him as a normal man, the other half as a demon. Roger insists that he doesn't know anyone who would want him dead, but mutters "Nobody ''alive.''" to himself after they leave.

Dan's death prompts the FDA to withhold final approval for Exthion-B. Acting on advice from his lawyer, Colin (Creator/CharlesMartinSmith), a badly shaken Roger tracks down Kevin, only to find him dead from an Exthion-B overdose, another note on the body. He accuses Colin of trying to frame him for the murders and fatally bashes his skull in, but Roger finds that he isn't alone. The zombified Alex emerges from the shadows, having returned from the grave thanks to the formula and sacrificial ritual. He points out that the handwriting on the notes and on Roger's memos is the same, revealing that Roger himself killed Dan and Kevin. Alex explains that he was given voodoo magic thanks to his undead state, and put a curse on Roger as revenge for selling him out, a curse that allowed for Roger's evil side to escape his conscious control and act on its own accord. The reveal infuriates Roger so much that he decapitates Alex, then decides to get to work solving his problem.

Roger soon calls in a witch doctor, Dr. Beneloy ([[Creator/CheechAndChong Cheech Marin]]), to regain full control of himself. After undergoing a ritual to destroy his evil side, a weakened Roger asks his secretary Withers (Judith Baldwin) to bring all the Exthion-B in stock to his office, only for her to begin screaming bloody murder at the mangled and decayed ruin that now makes up half of Roger's body. The delirious Roger rambles on about having beaten Alex and prepares to inject himself with the Exthion-B, aiming to either keep himself alive or put himself out of his misery.

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!! Tropes:
* AmbiguousEnding: Regarding Roger deciding to inject himself with Exthion-B, is he doing so because he wants to stay alive longer? Or does he plan to overdose and relieve the pain of his half-destroyed body?
* AmnesiacDissonance: Roger has no idea that his evil side escaped his control and is killing his friends one by one.
* AndIMustScream: Roger ends up destroying his evil side, but half of his body is left a rotted mess. He injects himself with all of the remaining samples of Exthion-B to preserve himself, but that won't ease the pain a half-rotted body will bring. The police are also hinted to have found him out, so he'll be spending his newfound eternal life behind bars.
* ArcWords: "I have not forgotten or forgiven.", which Roger sees on nearly every piece of paper and wall that he looks at.
* BANGFlagGun: The Crypt Keeper fires one off in his closing segment.
* BigRedDevil: Half of Roger's voodoo doll appears as one of them, representing his evil side.
* BodyHorror: The bloody, decaying half of Roger's body after he destroys his evil side is enough to make Withers scream bloody murder.
* BodyPaint: Roger's evil side leaves pitch-black illustrations of tribal markings on the bodies of its victims.
* BuriedAlive: This is how the Brazilian natives accomplish their human sacrifices. Alex was duped into meeting this fate by his best friend.
* CallingCard: The tribal markings and the "forgotten or forgiven" notes that Roger's evil side leaves behind on/with the victims' bodies.
* ChromosomeCasting: The episode's cast is composed almost entirely of men, the only female present being Roger's secretary Withers.
* ColdHam: Dr. Beneloy, who can easily deduce Roger's advanced curse by observing him and the voodoo doll. He goes full on LargeHam during the voodoo ritual to destroy Roger's evil side, dolling himself up in tribesman's apparel and levitating to Roger as it commences.
* CorruptCorporateExecutive: Roger is the president of a major chemical company who ''tries'' to be a respectable businessman in the office. When his evil side escapes his control and kills his friends, he plays the trope partially-straight.
** Even ''before'' his evil side escaped, Roger was shown to be a villainous man. He and his friends entered Brazil illegally, stole sacred healing herbs, and sacrificed his best friend to a native tribe in exchange for ''more'' herbs.
* DeadpanSnarker: Roger is quick to lay on the snark, being the stressed-out corporate honcho he is.
* DeathActivatedSuperpower: Being sacrificed to the natives and coming back as a zombie apparently gave Alex voodoo powers, as he places a curse on Roger that makes his evil side escape his mind.
* DirtyCop: The Brazilian police are said to have been bribed by Roger to allow him and his friends into the country illegally so they could steal the natives' herbs. When the bribe wasn't big enough for their tastes, they turned traitor and decided to bust them for entering the country without visas.
* DownerEnding: Though the Crypt Keeper says the episode had a happy ending, it's clear that the ''real'' ending is anything but:
** Roger destroys his evil side, but doing so renders him half-dead.
** He then proceeds to use all of the Exthion-B samples left in stock to keep himself alive (which may not even succeed), leaving him virtually penniless.
** Withers notes that the police have found the bodies of Alex and Colin in his office, which reveals that he's the killer. So even if Roger ''does'' survive injecting himself, he's going to be spending eternity in prison.
* EnemyWithout: Alex's curse caused Roger's evil side to escape his subconscious mind and act on its own volition, killing Dan and Kevin. Roger has new-age witch doctor Dr. Beneloy perform a ritual on him in order to mitigate this, but the result leaves [[BodyHorror half of his body a rotted, mangled mess]].
* EveryoneHasStandards: Roger's friends clearly weren't as ambitious as him while they witnessed him joining a native tribe into performing a human sacrifice, even telling him that they were going straight to Hell for their association with the act.
* ExactWords: When the police ask Roger if there are any people who might have access to his preservative and would want him and his friends dead, Roger insists that he doesn't know anyone who fits that description, before muttering to himself "Nobody ''alive''." after the police leave. He was referring to Alex, whom he sold out as a HumanSacrifice to a native tribe six years ago, but has no idea about the extent of truthfulness in his words.
* FantasticDrug: Exthion-B has shades of it, given that it's used to kill Roger's friends and business partners via an overdose.
* {{Flashback}}: We get a couple of scenes featuring Roger and his friends in Brazil six years ago, one of them showing the moment where Alex was sold out as a human sacrifice.
* {{Foreshadowing}}:
** The voodoo doll of Roger depicts him as half-businessman, half-devil. When Roger destroys his evil side at the end of the episode, he appears half-rotted, similar to the doll.
** In Brazil, Roger told his friends that everyone has an evil side, and how the trick is to keep it under control.
** Roger suffers from headaches when he brings up his trip to Brazil and his dead friends, and has been known to miss entire days because of this. This is because his evil side has been escaping his psyche, thanks to Alex's curse.
** Colin also tells him that everyone needs at least ''one'' person to dish out a little truth. This is exactly what Alex reveals himself to Roger for.
* FoulFlower: The herbs that produce Exthion-B grow these kinds of flowers. They're able to turn any liquid they come into contact with blue, and are utilized for ritual sacrifice by the tribesmen who harvest them. When processed into Exthion-B, they allow for any organic matter they come into contact with to stay preserved forever.
* GilliganCut: A shot of a mask-wearing native in Brazil allows for the scene to change to Roger's office, where that same mask sits.
* HeadacheOfDoom: Roger suffers from headaches whenever his friends die or when he remembers his trip to Brazil, hinting that his evil side is either leaving or returning to his mind.
* HealingHerb: The herbs that the natives in Brazil used in their formula are hinted to be these. When Roger's company processes them into Exthion-B, they allow for anything organic to be kept preserved forever.
* HealingPotion: Exthion-B is processed from an herbal formula used by a Brazilian tribe. Anything organic that's injected with it will be kept fresh for eternity.
* HereWeGoAgain: The episode ends with a half-dead Roger preparing to inject himself with a batch of Exthion-B so that he can survive. Either that, or he's planning to overdose and put himself down.
* HollywoodVoodoo: The natives in Brazil are shown to practice this. Their magic allows Roger's evil side to escape his mind and go on a killing spree.
* HumanSacrifice: The tribal ritual that Roger and his friends witnessed. Roger secretly sold out Alex as a sacrifice in exchange for the tribe's formula, which his company processed into their new preservative. Unfortunately for Roger, Alex didn't stay dead.
* TheIllegal: Roger and his friends were these six years ago, when they illegally entered Brazil by bribing crooked police officers. The cops are shown to have been displeased with Roger's meager bribe and began hunting them down, hoping to bust them for entering the country without work visas.
* IndestructibleEdible: Exthion-B turns any food that's injected with it into this, allowing it to stay fresh forever.
* IronicEcho: As Roger tells Alex, just before he sacrifices him, "We came down here to go all the way!"
* TheKillerInMe: The killer turns out to be Roger himself, his evil side having escaped his mental control after a curse from his undead former friend Alex.
* LaserGuidedKarma: If Roger survives whatever he intends to use the Exthion-B for, the police have figured out that it was him who killed his friends and his lawyer, so he'll be spending his extended life in prison.
* LaughingMad: Roger maniacally laughs after Dr. Beneloy's ritual, thinking he's beaten Alex's curse.
* LiteralSplitPersonality: A variation of the trope comes into play with Roger's evil side. It's been established to have escaped his control, but it's never seen controlling Roger or actively killing his friends. Regardless, Roger ''does'' throw out a factoid that he's been blacking out for entire days because of this.
* MysteriousNote: Roger finds one in Dan's pocket that reads "I have not forgotten or forgiven." The statement keeps turning up in all sorts of places Roger looks.
* NoodleImplements: Roger observes a number of surgical tools next to him as the ritual to destroy his evil side begins. We never learn what they're used for, but we see a puddle of blood surrounding them when the deed is done.
* NothingIsScarier: Whatever Dr. Beneloy did to Roger that got rid of his evil side, and therefore destroyed half of his body, is never revealed at any given point.
* OffWithHisHead: Roger decapitates Alex when he starts digging into the truth behind his friends' murders.
* OneDoseFitsAll: A single syringe of Exthion-B is enough to keep anything organic preserved forever. As Roger discovers, it's also enough to kill a man and turn his body into a zombified husk.
* OneSceneWonder: Dr. Beneloy, the witch doctor played by Cheech Marin who rids Roger of his evil side.
* PersonaNonGrata: Roger and his friends are shown to have snuck into Brazil without visas by bribing some crooked local cops. The cops weren't satisfied with Roger's bribe and decided to turn on them, looking to bust them for illegal entry and bar them from the country.
* PleaseIWillDoAnything: Roger begs Dr. Beneloy to get rid of his evil side, saying that he'll pay everything he owns, including the profits of Exthion-B.
* PoliceAreUseless: Demonstrated both in America and Brazil:
** The cops in America simply call Roger to identify bodies and investigate the scenes of the crimes. Beyond that, they're no better at finding the culprit than Roger is.
** The cops in Brazil were even worse, having been bribed by Roger to let him and his friends enter the country illegally. They quickly turned traitor when they were unimpressed with the bribe, and aimed to bust them for not having visas.
* RedHerring: Alex is teased as being the killer and is looking to kill Roger himself as revenge for being sacrificed. The undead Alex ''does'' come to confront Roger, but he admits that he isn't the killer; Roger himself is, thanks to a curse he put on him that allowed his evil side to escape his control.
* RevenantZombie: Alex became one of these, even equipped with voodoo powers, after Roger sold him out as a HumanSacrifice. Revenge is his only motivation as the result, and he does so by laying a curse on Roger that causes his evil side to escape his control.
* RichesToRags: Roger gives all of his money to Dr. Beneloy so he can destroy his evil side, and is implied to have become dirt poor in the final scene. He also aims to use all the Exthion-B samples he has left to preserve himself, costing him any other opportunity at riches.
* RiddleForTheAges:
** We never see Roger's evil side in person, so we have no idea what it looks like. The voodoo doll that Roger finds hints that it may be a BigRedDevil.
** What exactly happens during Roger's evil side-destroying ritual is also intentionally left vague.
* SarcasticClapping: Alex does this toward Roger as he introduces himself, right after Roger kills Colin.
* SuperSerum: Exthion-B, which keeps any organic material injected with it permanently fresh. Clothing will never fade, wood will never rot, food will never spoil, etc. It does the same on human bodies, but it kills them in the process.
* UnnaturallyBlueLighting: Exthion-B emits a strong blue glow whenever it's shown on screen.
* VillainWithGoodPublicity: Roger's interview where he describes how Exthion-B works shows that he's pretty well-respected, in spite of all the shady dealings he's committed.
* VoodooDoll: One of them is used to represent Roger and his newly-freed evil side, appropriately appearing as half-man, half-devil.
* WayPastTheExpirationDate: Food injected with Exthion-B can stay fresh long after the expiration date. Roger demonstrates this with a pair of apples that were harvested two years ago, still looking as fresh as when they were picked from the tree.
* WeUsedToBeFriends: Roger and Alex were best friends in the past, but after Roger sold Alex out for the formula and made him a human sacrifice, Alex has only revenge in mind regarding Roger.
* WhamShot: When Alex reveals that Roger's handwriting is the same as the notes the killer has been leaving, revealing that the killer is Roger's liberated evil side.
* WhatNowEnding: Roger ends the episode half-rotted and barely alive, preparing to inject himself with Exthion-B. We don't know whether he intends to live longer, or overdose and kill himself.
* WhereAreTheyNowEpilogue: The Crypt Keeper says that Roger's company was still successful after everything that went wrong for him.
* WitchDoctor: Dr. Beneloy, who Roger calls to perform a ritual that will destroy his evil side to get back at Alex. He looks like an ordinary doctor when he and Roger first meet, but he dons the traditional witch doctor attire and makeup during Roger's ritual.
* WithFriendsLikeThese: Alex has nothing but hatred towards Roger when he returns from the dead, since Roger sold him out as a human sacrifice in Brazil.
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->'''Crypt Keeper:''' Well, at least in the end, Roger knew ''rot'' from wrong. If only he'd learned a little ''fester.'' You'll be happy to know, kiddies, that our story has a happy ending. Roger's company did very well. Its shares shot up... on the New York ''Shock'' Exchange! (''cackles'') So, have we made up our minds? You want bangs? Perfect. (''pulls out a pistol'') I have just the thing! (''cackles and fires the gun, revealing it to be a BANGFlagGun'') Bang! (''cackles some more'')