MASH 4077 celebrates the birthday of one of their nurses, Edwina Ferguson, but the party goes awry when it turns out Edwina is sad because she had signed up to be a military nurse to [[SingleWomanSeeksGoodMan find the right guy]] to spend the rest of her life with and has not had a man in her life at all since being dumped. And it seems like she never will, as her round of service in Korea is near completion, and she will be going home in a couple of weeks.

When it appears that no man at the camp will date Eddie, the nurses launch into action by enacting a blanket "No Date" strike at the 4077 until it happens. The men panic and try to find a way around it, but it soon becomes clear the nurses are standing firm and resolute, and they surrender. What they need now is for one of them to volunteer...

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!!Attention, attention! This whole affair involved the following tropes:

* ActuallyPrettyFunny:
** Nurse Margie Cutler, Hawkeye's current LoveInterest, thinks this about Hawkeye "winning" the date with Edwina. Frank thinks it's funny too.
** After everyone suffers AmusingInjuries, Hawkeye can't help but laugh his ass off at how the night has gone.
* AmusingInjuries: Let's count the many Hawkeye received during his date with Edwina.
** 1. Hit on the forehead with the edge of a door.
** 2. Martini accidentally thrown in his face.
** 3. Headbutted in the left eye
---> '''Hawkeye''': Okay, okay, it's over. We're just two people waiting for a bus. Or, in my case, an ambulance.
** 4. Rear end burned on the tent furnace stove.
** 5. Feet cut to ribbons on broken glass.
** 6. Falls back into shelving.
** 7. Shelving topples onto his head.
** 8. Injures his shoulder.
---> '''Edwina''': I killed you.
---> '''Hawkeye''': [[LampshadeHanging I don't have that kind of luck.]]
** 9. Even when things do get romantic, it still happens. Furnace stove pipe falls on Hawkeye's head. Hawk laughs this one off.
*** Radar comes to the doctors after taking another finger to the eye. Seems like he'll never learn about looking in the nurse's shower...
* ApologeticAttacker: Edwina always says sorry every time she inadvertently hurts someone or get somebody humiliated.
* AsskickingLeadsToLeadership: Flipped around. Trapper attempts to get Henry to use his authority as the commanding officer to stop the strike.
--> '''Trapper''': Henry, you're the commanding officer. Command the girls to cut this out! It's driving us nuts!
* BlatantLies: Henry tells Hawkeye and Trapper that he's been hit by the strike just as badly as the are. That part's true. What isn't is his claim that he's not falling apart.
--> '''Radar''': Shower's ready, sir.\\
'''Henry''': Is it cold?\\
'''Radar''': Icy, sir.
* ButNowIMustGo: Edwina departs the 4077 in the final scene.
* CantBelieveISaidThat: Henry really blows it when trying to ask Leslie out.
* CooperationGambit: Hawkeye threatens Frank when he doesn't agree to help end the protest.
--> '''Hawkeye''': Frank, I think I speak for everyone when I say that if you don't lend your full co-operation in our little enterprise, you will be stripped naked, painted purple, and dropped by helicopter behind enemy lines.
* CoveredInGunge: It's Hawkeye's turn to [[CallBack have his face covered with soot]].
* CovertPervert: Unfortunately, Radar wasn't as covert as he would have liked to be.
* DeadpanSnarker: Hawkeye's hilarious summing up of the nurses' "no-date" strike.
--> '''Hawkeye''': The whole thing is inhuman, unfair and un-American. ''[pauses, as tries to get a random nurse's attention, and fails]'' Besides, it's bad for the health.
** Hawkeye gets really irritated at Frank at one point.
---> '''Hawkeye''': What do army regulations say about strangling a man with his own tongue? ''[looks at Trapper]'' Get out of my way.
** Margie Cutler gets one of her own. Apparently, she's getting tired of his ladies' man tendencies.
---> '''Nurse Cutler''': Now we'll see how the great lover operates.
** Edwina loves the way the Swamp has been fixed up for the date. Hawkeye responds:
---> '''Hawkeye''': Trapper took a correspondence course in interior decorating. He failed it, of course.
* DrawingStraws: This is how the men choose to decide who will take Edwina on a date.
* TheDreaded: All the guys in camp are afraid to date Eddie, even [[TheCasanova Hawkeye]].
* TheEeyore: As Edwina will tell you, she's not jolly. And she's not a fella either.
* FakeOutOpening: The episode opens with tense music playing while the camera pans across the characters' anticipatory faces, as Radar listens intently for someone's approach and then whispers a ten-second countdown. Incoming wounded? An enemy patrol? Nope, they're all just waiting in the mess tent for Edwina to show up for her [[SurpriseParty surprise birthday party]].
* HilarityEnsues: The nurses stick to their protesting in the utmost of fashions. Of course this means a lot of laughs when the men are continually turned down.
* INeedAFreakingDrink: Hawkeye says the line almost word for word when he loses at straws.
** [[LiquidCourage He downs two martinis later on, just before his date with Eddie]].
* INeedToGoIronMyDog: As part of the boycott, Leslie repeatedly stonewalls Henry's advances by claiming that she needs to wash her hair... even as she's just finished washing it. Though [[OpenMouthInsertFoot Henry doesn't do himself any favors]] when he retorts that, [[ComicallyMissingThePoint if she keeps washing her hair that much]], she's going to end up with a head like a cueball.
* JerkWithAHeartOfGold: Frank behaves unusually nicely at Edwina's birthday party.
* TheKlutz: Edwina's reputation for being a magnet for calamity is the reason the she doesn't get any attention from the guys at camp; they're all too afraid to get close to her and risk accidental injury.
* LysistrataGambit: The basic plot of the episode.
* [[OneOfTheBoys One of the Girls]]: Given that Frank is among the men spurned by the nurses at Hawkeye's meeting, it is implied that Margaret supports the nurses' protest. The implication has added strength when the two are not seen together until after the men have surrendered.
* OOCIsSeriousBusiness:
** Edwina Ferguson is a smart woman, so she knows when Hawkeye is seeking her romantic attention, she can tell something is up right away.
** It is heavily implied that Margaret sided with the nurses against Frank, something we don't see again until her marriage to Donald.
* QuestForSex: It's more implied than stated outright (this being early-'70s network TV and all), but Edwina is shipping back home soon and is hoping to lose her virginity before leaving Korea.
--> '''Edwina''': ''[to Nurse Cutler]'' Margie, I am twenty-eight years old and I have never... ''[beat]'' ...[[LastSecondWordSwap had someone to care for me]].
* ReallyGetsAround: Hawkeye does his usual hitting on Henry when they get no love from the nurses, and the first episode where his reputation works against him.
* SadClown: More jokes from Hawkeye about being scared his family will abandon him.
* ShrinkingViolet: Edwina.
* StealthPun: The episode about unlucky Edwina is [[ThirteenIsUnlucky episode 13]].
* SureLetsGoWithThat: Henry tries to make a speech at the party and is eventually drowned out by the camp doing a hearty rendition of "For He's a Jolly Good Fellow". He stops speechmaking and joins in.
* SurpriseParty: The episode opens up with the members of the 4077 throwing a birthday party for Edwina.
* TemptingFate:
** Trapper thinks the nurses wouldn't dare to carry out their protest. Guess what, Trap? '''They. Would.'''
** Hawkeye puts on a bravado speech to the man who will draw the short straw and take it upon himself to date Edwina.
---> '''Hawkeye''': There comes a time in every soldier's life, from the lowliest private to the lowliest officer, when he must put his own wellbeing second to the greater good of his fellow fellows, his comrades in arms, his war buddies. Let us each, in his very own quiet heart, say to that courageous man whoever he may turn out to be: "And there, but for the fickle pick of fate, go I. And què serà serà?" No hard feelings. May the best man, uh, well, whatever.
---> ''[Hawkeye draws the short straw]''\\
'''Hawkeye''': [[OhCrap Shall we make it]] [[ThisIsGonnaSuck two out of three?]]
* UnfortunateNames: Edwina's ex, Seymour Chomkey. At least, that's how Nurse Cutler sees it.
* WeirdTradeUnion: The nurses build up an interesting strike. If no man dates Eddie before she leaves for home, then all of the men in the camp won't ever have a date again.

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