'''Airdate:''' January 17, 2002

Brian, depressed over dating nothing but bimbos[[note]]though the later episodes wouldn't have this[[/note]], gets busted on a DUI after a night at the planetarium and is sentenced to care for an elderly shut-in who used to be famous. Meanwhile, Peter decides to grow a beard so he can be manly like Grizzly Adams, but ends up housing three rare birds.
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!!"Brian Wallows and Peter Swallows" contains examples of:
* BittersweetEnding: SethMacfarlane considered this (at the time of the DVD release) the one episode that contained "real human emotion". Essentially, Pearl dies, yet gets to spend her last moments imagining what her life would be with Brian. Peter, meanwhile, has to release his birds, yet does so knowing they grew up.
* BrickJoke: At the laser show, Mayor West is seen in love with his left hand. Later after Brian's court case is dismissed, West and his hand arrive in court to be wedded.
* ButtMonkey: Brian
* ChekhovsGun: The virtual reality glasses from the show Peter and the guys go to plays a very important role in the final scene.
* CommercialBreakCliffhanger: Some versions of this episode cut to commercial just before Brian saves Pearl from her noose.
* DisappointedInYou: Joe tells Brian this when he arrests him.
* DisneyAcidSequence: "You've Got a Lot to See".
* DivingSave: Brian saves Pearl from hanging herself.
* DoubleEntendre: In a CutawayGag, we see Brian selling food at a Hickory Farms store at the mall asking a man if he wants to taste his "smoked meat log", which gets him punched in the face.
* HypocriticalHumor: [[LampshadeHanging Lampshaded]] when the ornithologist who tells Peter that his bird is endangered points out the irony of him going to a restaurant that exclusively sells poultry.
* IWishedYouWereDead: Brian told Pearl to drop dead, only to feel bad when he finds out about her past and comes back just in time to stop her from committing suicide.
* InterspeciesRomance: Brian and Pearl. One simulation in the virtual reality scene is them having children both being humans and puppies.
* JustTestingYou: Pearl yells that she fell and can't get up and Brian comes to her aid, but it turned out to be a test.
-->'''Pearl:''' Five point three seconds! I could have been dead by now!
* MoodWhiplash: After Peal dies.
-->'''Dr. Hartman:''' Hey, who wants to see a dead body!?
* MyGodWhatHaveIDone: Brian feels this way for letting Pearl go outside only for her to get run over.
* RealTime: The scene with the de-lousing powder.
* ShoutOut
** Lois and Brian have a conversation while one of her piano students plays a scale in a scene reminiscent of ''TheMusicMan''.
** Peter watches ''TheLifeAndTimesOfGrizzlyAdams'' on TV, in which Grizzly and his bear Ben are gay lovers.
** [[SchoolHouseRock "It's great to learn, CAUSE KNOWLEDGE IS POWER!"]]
* SpeakNowOrForeverHoldYourPeace: When Mayor West marries his left hand in court, the judge asks this and West raises his right hand.
-->'''Mayor West:''' Shut up! You had your chance.
* StatusCellPhone: Brian sings a song about how society has changed since the 50's. He sings a line about a businessman with a cell phone and how busy his life must be, then mentioning how the phone will give him a tumor, but his doctor will see it and admit how cool he is.
-->Those fancy cellphones, make people mumble "gee whiz, look how important he is, his life must rule!"
-->He'll get a tumor, but on the surgery day, the doc will see it and say "Man, you must really be cool!"
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