->So there's absolutely no reason to be suspicious!
-->-- '''Barney Fife''', ''Series/TheAndyGriffithShow''

->'''Krieger:''' I'm not a... ''serial'' killer!
->'''Archer:''' Wait, why did you emphasize "serial?"
->'''Kriegar:''' Wait, I did -- ''whaaaat?'' Are we doing? Did I mention I have a surprise for you?
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/{{Archer}}''

->'''Cute woman:''' Hello!
->'''Stuart:''' (''[[CannotTalkToWomen silent and uncomfortable, unable to talk, but he likes her a lot]]'')
->'''Cute woman:''' It's a great party!
->'''Stuart:''' Thank you.
->'''Cute woman:''' The monsters' food, they're really fun.
->'''Stuart:''' Yes, thank you. I like to think of fun things like that. Because I'm ''fun''. I'm not clinically depressed at all.
-->-- ''Series/TheBigBangTheory'', "The Holographic Excitation"

->I made the zombies! I was never as good as my totally not made up brother Zed, and we're totally different people!
-->--'''Dr. [[strike: Zed]] Ned''', ''VideoGame/{{Borderlands}}'', approximately every other sentence

->MAYHEM CAUSED, MONSTERS CERTAINLY NOT INVOLVED
-->-- A newspaper headline from ''Series/BuffyTheVampireSlayer''

->"Good afternoon. This is your captain speaking. Just to say there is absolutely nothing to worry about."
->"Hello. Captain Crieff here again. Still no need to panic. I repeat, there is ''no need'' to panic."
->"Or to look out of the windows."
-->-- '''Captain Martin Crieff''', ''Radio/CabinPressure'', "Douz"

->This is an emergency! Control must be believed and obeyed! No-one in the colony believes in Macra! There is no such thing as Macra! Macra do not exist! There are no Macra!
-->-- '''[[spoiler:Macra speaking as]] The Controller''', ''Series/DoctorWho'', "The Macra Terror"

->'''Worker:''' [[ConstructionCatcalls Tight-looking piece, eh?]]
->(''Workers are looking up the girl's ass for two panels while she talks to an old lady. The girl finally notices'')
->'''Miriam:''' '''Hey! What's going on?'''
->'''Worker:''' Just taking a break, ma'am! These boxes are heavy. I wasn't admiring the view or nothin'! Hahaha!
-->-- ''Fansadox'' #191, "Mad Justice"

->AUTHOR'S NOTE: The following is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to persons living or dead is purely coincidental.
->Especially you, Jenny Beckman.
->Bitch.
-->-- Opening subtitle, ''Film/FiveHundredDaysOfSummer''

->Hey, you're doing great! Most people don't last this long! I mean... y'know. [[ReleasedToElsewhere They usually move on to other things by now]]. [[VerbalBackspace I'm not implying that they died. That's not what I meant.]]
-->-- '''Phone Guy''''s Night 3 message, ''VideoGame/FiveNightsAtFreddys''

->'''Ki:''' It's not caffeine, not sugar... not time for ''Franchise/StarWars'' [[Film/AttackOfTheClones Episode II]] yet... doesn't look like "Mr. Colon" is acting up again... could be job anxiety...
->'''Nick:''' Nope! No job anxiety here! Didn't get an impossible-to-turn-down dream job, nosiree! Not me!
->'''Ki:''' Bingo.
-->-- ''Webcomic/GeneralProtectionFault'', [[http://www.gpf-comics.com/archive/2002/03/28 March 28, 2002]]

->M.U.T.O. ASSURES ALL PERSONNEL, THERE IS NO CONSPIRACY IN OUR ORGANIZATION.
-->-- ''Film/{{Godzilla 2014}}'' M.U.T.O. Research website

->I don't care if Ewald Jackson is from Adelaide, wherever that is. It doesn't impress me at all, and Bridgette's not impressed either, and she only spoke to him to be polite. Anyway, he was only congratulating her on winning first prize with her bark picture. Bark pictures aren't really art so it doesn't matter about Bridgette winning and not me because we weren't in the same category.
-->-- '''Kirsty Dean''', ''I Hate Fridays'' omnibus

->They say that the more specific a denial is, the more likely it is that the accusations are true.
-->-- '''Hisao Nakai''', ''VisualNovel/KatawaShoujo''

->'''[[PlayerCharacter Jedi Exile]]:''' Are you responsible for this?
->'''HK-50:''' Defensive Answer: Master, I am a protocol droid, not a well-crafted assassination droid of unrivaled sophistication. To have carried out the actions that took place here would have required an unusual set of skills. It is highly unlikely I possess the knowledge of how to reprogram the memory cores of base-worker class droids into killing machines let alone to terminate the organics at this facility, utilizing only Aratech 500 series laser mining drills and explosives fashioned from proton missile cores!
-->-- ''VideoGame/KnightsOfTheOldRepublicIITheSithLords''

->'''Kro-Bar:''' Aliens? Us? Is this one of your Earth jokes?
->'''Fleming:''' See? See?
->'''Lattis:''' You should not have said "Earth jokes." Don't you see how that gave us away?
-->-- ''Film/TheLostSkeletonOfCadavra''

->This is not a {{hentai}}. [[NoExceptYes It's a marital aid text printed in the manga style.]]
-->-- ''MangaSutra''

->'''Doctor:''' This is not a KangarooCourt.
->'''Patrick:''' Did I say it was? [[LampshadeHanging Interesting that you'd deny an unmade accusation.]]
-->-- ''Series/TheMentalist''

->'''Sawaki''' (''after being sucked by a girl and a transvestite''): You got it wrong! Mutou-san, you got it all wrong! It's a misunderstanding! I'm completely normal!
->'''Mutou:''' I didn't see anything! Me, Aoi Mutou, naturally didn't see anything with these eyes!
->'''Sawaki:''' [[HypocriticalHumor Don't just lie to me!]]
-->-- Hentai doujin based on ''{{Manga/Moyashimon}}''

->[[FaceFullOfAlienWingWong And then I ram my ovipositor down your throat and lay my eggs in your chest]], [[MostDefinitelyNotAVillain but I'm not an alien!]]
-->-- '''[[Series/MysteryScienceTheater3000 Tom Servo]]''' mocking the obviously alien Exeter in ''Film/ThisIslandEarth''

->'''Elan:''' I promise to be the bestest [[SpoonyBard bard]] ever and never be bad and never accidentally lead you into an ambush and--
->'''Roy:''' That's an oddly specific promise...
-->-- ''Webcomic/TheOrderOfTheStick: On the Origin of [=PCs=]''

->After making these statements, he assured us that he was (in fact) "stable." Itís funny how ''asserting'' oneís stability tends to create the opposite impression.
-->-- ''WebComic/PennyArcade'', the [[TheRant news post]] for "[[http://penny-arcade.com/comic/2007/04/30 Unique Fauna]]"

->Contact with the colony on Mars will be shortly re-established, and this has nothing to do with the impending arrival of the mysterious aliens.
-->-- ''VideoGame/QuakeII'' intro

->'''[[Anime/NeonGenesisEvangelion Shinji]]:''' Did you see anything?
->'''Misato:''' No, I didn't see anyone.
-->-- ''Manga/ReTake''


->'''RYAN REYNOLDS:''' Well allow me to shake your hand.
->'''JEFF BRIDGES:''' No loser, you must earn my handshake. (''[[BreakingTheFourthWall to camera]]'') This setup wonít be forgotten and is totally going to pay off in the end. Honest. Pinky swear. Wink.
->'''Aside:''' [[CaptainObvious Heís LYING]].
-->-- [[http://www.the-editing-room.com/r-i-p-d.html The Abridged Script]] for ''Film/{{RIPD}}''

->'''Tribe Leader:''' The blue-haired woman will make a good sacrifice.
->'''Marge:''' What's he saying?
->'''Mr. Burns:''' Aaaaaaaaah... he's saying... ummmmm... we wouldn't ''dream'' of sacrificing the blue-haired woman!
->'''Marge''': [[TooDumbToLive Awwwwww, well isn't that]]--
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'', "TreehouseOfHorror III"

->If I were a girl... AND I AM... I'd watch my step.
-->-- '''Jerry aka "[[DisguisedInDrag Daphne]]"''', ''Film/SomeLikeItHot''

->'''Dr. Eggman:''' This amusement park was constructed entirely out of a sense of remorse for my past transgressions, and is in no way associated with any sort of evil plot or premeditated misdeeds.
->'''Sonic:''' [[SarcasmMode Well,]] ''[[SarcasmMode that's]]'' [[SarcasmMode a relief.]]
-->-- ''VideoGame/SonicColors''

->'''Colonel Sandurz:''' (''opens door'') Lord Helmet!
->'''Dark Helmet:''' (''quickly hides dolls'') WHAT!?
->'''Colonel Sandurz:''' You're needed on the bridge, sir!
->'''Dark Helmet:''' KNOCK ON MY DOOR! KNOCK NEXT TIME!
->'''Colonel Sandurz:''' Yes, sir!
->(''{{beat}}'')
->'''Dark Helmet:''' ...Did you see anything!?
->'''Colonel Sandurz:''' No, sir! I didn't see you playing with your dolls again!
->'''Dark Helmet:''' GOOD!
-->-- ''Film/{{Spaceballs}}''

->A silly rumor, really. It has to do with viral contamination of lubricants at Bearing Works Twenty-three. Ah, excuse me -- I mean with the ''non''contamination of lubricants at... Never mind. It is totally without foundation, the Health Center informs us. And there is no cause for alarm. It is absolutely not true that it causes impotency among males-- Correction. There is no contamination -- but if there were, it would not affect the potency of males.
-->-- '''Ida''', ''{{Literature/Sten}}''

->So you really want to know, eh? All right, fine, Jeane is... a very nice young lady, with absolutely no mind-boggling secrets to hide. None whatsoever. Moving on...
-->-- '''Oboro''''s final investigation on Jeane in ''VideoGame/SuikodenV''

->'''Anise:''' Huh? It's a [[MixAndMatchCritters rappig]] doll...
->'''Tear:''' Ah, n-no! You got it wrong! I just found it in a shop at Belkend. It's not like I thought it was cute or anything. Yeah, I just... ehm... that is... Anise, don't tell anyone, okay?
-->-- A skit in ''VideoGame/TalesOfTheAbyss''

->'''Disclaimer:''' [[Franchise/{{Transformers}} TFWiki]] is well aware that [[http://tfwiki.net/wiki/Image:LegionRape1.jpg this picture]] contains no visual references to rape, [[FreudWasRight phallic symbols]], [[HumongousMecha giant robots]], frightened cartoon females [[{{Lolicon}} who may or may not be of pre-voting age]], or manga-convention background lines. In fact, [[http://tfwiki.net/w2/images2/4/4f/LegionRape1.jpg this picture]] is [[BlatantLies completely blank]].
-->-- [[http://tfwiki.net/wiki/Atari_Hitotonari#Fiction Transformers Wiki]]

->"Good evening, everybody. We are the Umbilical Brothers, and '''not''' superintelligent alien dinosaurs. We do not intend to replace the Umbilical Brothers using their own DNA. We do not intend to replace the front row of the audience using the Umbilical Brothers' DNA."
->"Yes, we do."
->"No, we don't. Shh!"
-->-- '''Creator/TheUmbilicalBrothers''', ''Speedmouse''

->'''Stuart:''' Freddie's scared he's never going to work again. There, how does that feel?
->'''Freddie:''' I never said such a thing, ''and you swore you'd never mention it!''
-->-- ''Series/{{Vicious}}''

->hey come check out our cool bunker, guys. I promise there's no crazy wormhole thing under our base continuously killing us
-->-- '''LetsPlay/{{Sips}}''', ''The LetsPlay/{{Yogscast}}'' [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F2ohslGivm8 Voltz Special: "The Bomb"]]


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