->''"Foolish Earthlings! Don't you know all rides must end near the gift shop?"''
-->-- '''Kang/Kodos,''' ''Ride/TheSimpsonsRide''

->''"Happy World Land. Happy World Land. Where the fun will never stop, at only 80 bucks a pop!"''
-->-- '''Plucky Duck,''' ''WesternAnimation/TinyToonAdventuresHowISpentMyVacation''

->''"Sweetie, [[AmusementParkOfDoom they won't kill you in an amusement park]] as long as [[TakeThat you have a dime]] left [[BitingTheHandHumor in your pocket.]]"''
-->-- '''Homer Simpson''', ''Ride/TheSimpsonsRide'' at Ride/UniversalStudios

->''"And let's not forget some of the other fine natural attractions we have here in the U.S.A., such as Theme Land, Theme World, [[BreadEggsBreadedEggs ThemePark World, ThemeLand Park, ThemeLandWorld Park, and Six Flags over AdventureParkLandTheme World]]. All of these fine attractions offer Fun for the Whole Family, such as food, rides, [[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment food]], and Comical Whimsy in the form of college students wearing costumes with enormous heads. These would make ideal disguises for terrorists."''
-->-- '''Creator/DaveBarry''', "Iowa's Safe But You'll Be Sorry"

->''"In my theme park empire, your entire village will be forced to wait in long lines, buy overpriced merch, and eat week-old turkey legs covered in... preservatives."''
-->-- '''Dr. Eggman''', ''WesternAnimation/SonicBoom'', "Blue with Envy"

->''Worlebury-juxta-Mare is precisely like every other weekend destination: shabbier than advertised and bristling with ways to spend more money than intended.''
-->-- ''Videogame/SunlessSkies''

->''"A majority of these rides end in gift shops and even though it's a smart thing to do in this [[CapitalismIsBad capitalist hellhole]], I just, like, GAH! How evil is that to do to parents who have kids!?"''
-->-- '''WebVideo/{{Alpharad}}''' on Ride/{{Disneyland}}, "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uizzVAltUWw I Rode EVERY Disneyland Ride in One Day]]"