->''There is probably no more terrible instance of enlightenment than the one in which you discover your father is a man with human flesh.''
-->-- '''''{{Dune}}'''''

->'''Scrooge:''' I'm not used to relatives either. The few I had seem to have... disappeared.
->'''Huey, Dewey and Louie:''' We know how ''that'' feels, Unca Scrooge.

->'''Kitty:''' Eric, I'm sure she's not abandoning Steven. She's his mother!
->'''Eric:''' Mom, her exact words were "I know I'm your mother, but I'm abandoning you Steven."
-->-- ''Series/That70sShow''

->"Okay, basically, my parents abandoned me, I was being raised by ocelots."
-->-- '''Dr. Doofenshmirtz''', ''WesternAnimation/PhineasAndFerb''

->''Father left home, poor mother died\\
Leaving Susie alone\\
Grandfather's soul too had flown...\\
No one to care...''
-->-- '''MichaelJackson''', "Little Susie"

->'''Natsuru''': Oh, of course. The missing parents. What is it this time? Dead? Fugitives?
-> '''Shizuku''': Diplomats.
-> '''Natsuru''': Oh, okay.
-->-- ''LightNovel/{{Kampfer}} Abridged''

->'''Daryl''': Do you have any family movies that have families in them?
-->-- ''ComicStrip/BabyBlues''

->"No, you know what, uncle Phil? I'll get through college without him, I'll get a great job without him, I'll marry me a beautiful honey and I'm having a whole bunch of kids. I'll be a better father than he ever was. And I sure as hell don't need him for that, 'cause there ain't a ''damn'' thing he can ever teach me about how to love my kids!"
->[long pause]
->[[TearJerker "...How come he don't want me, man?"]]
-->-- '''Will Smith''', ''TheFreshPrinceOfBelAir''

->'''Silver:''' Didn't your pap ever teach you to pick your fights a bit more carefully?\\
''[Jim looks away]''\\
'''Silver:''' Your father not the teachin' sort?\\
'''Jim:''' No. He was more the "taking off and never coming back" sort.
-->-- ''Disney/TreasurePlanet''