->'''Obi-Wan:''' We're messing up the GM's plans again. He probably had this whole city mapped out.\\
'''GM:''' No, you guys have been great for my improvisation. [[IndyPloy I've learnt not to plan ahead more than ten minutes.]]
-->-- ''Webcomic/DarthsAndDroids'', [[http://www.darthsanddroids.net/episodes/0041.html #41]]

->'''GM''': The Prophetess of Kell reads your omens and says that each of your number is destined to find one of the Signets of Power and be a Champion of Light in the coming Holy Wars. Once all of you have the Signets the Champions of Darkness will be released, and the fate of the world shall be decided.\\
'''Player''': ''([[InAndOutOfCharacter Out of Character]])'' Champion of Light, huh? So that explains all the stupid stuff going on lately. I ask the Prophetess where my Signet is to be found....\\
'''GM''': ''(as Prophetess)'' Ritualist Timon, your Signet may be found in the ruins of the Tower of Theurgy, guarded by wards only your hand may breach.\\
'''Player''': ''(in character)'' Tower of Theurgy, huh? I pull out my map and a compass. I draw a 10-mile radius circle on the map, centered on the Tower of Theurgy.\\
'''GM''': ''(looking confused)'' Okay....\\
'''Player''': I then ritually Geas myself to never set foot within the area represented on the map, lest I instantly die.\\
'''GM''': WHAT?\\
'''Player''': ''(addressing the Prophetess)'' Looks like the war has been called off...\\
'''GM''': ''(sobs quietly)''

->I just blew up my first gate. I'm not sure why I did it, really. I am not playing by the rules anymore.
-->-- '''Rose Lalonde''', ''Webcomic/{{Homestuck}}''

->Heck, as far as I'm concerned, the presence of players is a necessary evil at best. I think most {{gamemaster}}s will agree that their world functions significantly more smoothly before the [=PCs=] ever show up.
-->-- '''Redcloak''', preface to ''Webcomic/TheOrderOfTheStick: On the Origins of [=PCs=]''

->'''The Mouth of Sauron:''' Is there anyone amongst this rabble with the authority to-\\
'''"Aragorn:"''' Yeah, let's speed this up. (''[[OffWithHisHead decapitates the [=MoS=]]]'')\\
'''DM:''' What? [[AggressiveNegotiations You attack him? During parlay?]] [[WhatTheHellPlayer What is wrong with you guys?]] This is [[RuleOfThree the third time]] you've killed someone during negotiations!\\
'''"Legolas:"''' [[CombatPragmatist And yet they keep falling for it!]] It's hilarious.\\
'''DM:''' You're supposed to be a king! Can't you at least ''pretend'' to be one for a few seconds?\\
'''"Aragorn:"''' If I hadn't shot him Legolas would have.\\
'''"Legolas:"''' He's right, too. I was just about to [[CallingYourAttacks announce my attack.]]\\
'''"Aragorn:"''' What's the big deal? So he's dead.\\
'''DM:''' I have like, four pages of dialog written for him.\\
'''"Aragorn:"''' Oh now I'm ''really'' glad I killed him.
-->-- ''Webcomic/DMOfTheRings''

-> "Mahyar writes the plot, [[TheMunchkin Bob]] [[SelfDeprecation criticizes it]], [[TheRolePlayer Krayn]] enjoys it, [[TheRealMan Fred]] ignores it, and [[RandomNumberGod Seb]] balls it up!"
-->-- '''LetsPlay/BobLennon''', on the plot of ''WebVideo/{{Aventures}}''

->'''Mahyar:''' The quest was bring a crown from point A to point B.\\
'''Seb:''' We can't do it! It's too hard!
-->--''WebVideo/{{Aventures}}''

->'''Mahyar:''' Okay, I've made a one-shot campaign, we'll probably be done around 1 am.\\
(''Beat before the four players start laughing'')\\
'''Bob:''' (''still laughing'') He thinks we can do it in four hours! You know what that means, we won't leave until 5 am.\\
'''Seb:''' I'll go make some coffee.
-->--''WebVideo/{{Aventures}}'', the beginning of the 5th Live scenario

->'''[[MoralGuardians Fundamentalist fearmongering video]]''': This dungeon "master" is given complete control and "players" must do whatever dark things are demanded of them.\\
'''Real DM''': Please, just cross the river. You've all tried to [[BestialityIsDepraved seduce the catfish]] and it didn't work. I'm begging you.
-->--Tumblr chat post [[http://autiegotmoves.tumblr.com/post/173890516621/fundamentalist-fearmongering-video-this-dungeon by autiegotmoves]]

->''"'Freelic jumps into the pit [[SchmuckBait to gather the treasure!]]' Jay Jay nerdily proclaims, 'How much does Freelic get?' ...The camera switches to Daniel, whose [[OhCrap expression]] is priceless. It's the look a DM gets when an otherwise sharp player does what could be [[TooDumbToLive the most blitheringly stupid, disasterous thing possible]] to his campaign and it's going to take him a minute to fully process a description of how dead Freelic is. ''Oh dear God, ''his face reads'', there aren't enough clerics in the world to rez this guy.''"''
-->--'''WebVideo/TheSpoonyExperiment''' [[http://spoonyexperiment.com/mazes-and-monsters/ on]] ''Film/MazesAndMonsters''

->''With this character's death, the thread of prophecy is severed. Restore a saved game to restore the weave of fate, or persist in the doomed world you created.''
-->--''VideoGame/TheElderScrollsIIIMorrowind'', if you kill a plot-essential NPC

->'''Magnus:''' '''Okay.''' Here's the thing; you should ''[[HopelessBossFight run away]]''.\\
'''Lord Commander:''' That's an option?\\
'''Magnus:''' ''Yes''. Run away! Go back West! And I'll set you up with a brand new adventure. A fair one, in the Moot! It'll be fun! You'll have a clean slate! You won't be killed by the guards, you won't be eaten by an ogre, and most importantly, you can finally [[{{Railroading}} experience a story]]! With ''themes'' and ''characters''! You'll be making a brand new mythos in a way. You will be the centerpiece of a story! Weavers of a tapestry of dreams and jubilation! Just run away, [[ItMakesSenseInContext take father's pseudo-corpse with you]], and ''GO BACK''!\\
'''Whammudes:''' [[BigNo NO!]] You are dishonorable, Magnus! I will not run to this land of empty promises like a ''coward''! This may be a tram ride into hell, but it was forged of our own decisions. We made this adventure our own, through the pitfalls, and the mistakes, and the critical failures, and [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking the destruction of my fabulous knightly bottom]]! But it is ''ours''! And the fact that it's ours, the fact that ''we'' have ''made'' this... That makes it worth fighting for! I will stay to ''SPITE'' you, AND YOUR RAILROADING WAYS!\\
'''Grand Provost Marshall:''' Yeah...\\
'''Master of the Administratum:''' YEAH!\\
'''Rogal Dorn:''' [[BluntYes Yes]].\\
'''Grand Provost Marshall:''' Fuck you, [[AccidentalMisnaming Magno]], [[ItMakesSenseInContext you ruined my clown-goblin illegality law]]!\\
'''The God-Emperor of Mankind:''' [[foldercontrol]]

[[folder: New game goal: Spite Magnus. ]]
\\
'''Magnus:''' [[RageBreakingPoint Okay]], '''[[RageBreakingPoint FINE]]'''! ''If you want to fucking DIE, [[KillerGameMaster then you shall fucking]] '''[[KillerGameMaster DIE]]'''!''
-->-- ''WebAnimation/IfTheEmperorHadATextToSpeechDevice''

%%->''Anything you expect your players to fight, they will run from or talk to. Anything you expect them to run from or talk to, they will fight.''

%%-> [[spoiler:You know, you could ''totally'' reverse that guy's plan by just [[ExactWords cutting his hand off]] and bringing it to the tower.]]


->'''DM:''' [As Spike] [[BigNo NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!]]\\
'''Applejack:''' Twilight, did you [[RunningGag derail the campaign again somehow?]]\\
'''Twilight:''' What are you talking about? I'm not even in the same ROOM!
-->--''Webcomic/FriendshipIsDragons''

->''If you try to enforce a "serious" tone, [[TheComicallySerious it just makes the gags funnier]], and the players will treat you with the same casual blasphemy orangutans show to God.''
-->-- '''Website/{{Tumblr}} user theaustintollhaus'''

->There were ten unmolested locations, and several of them were having meetings this very night. Clearly the [[KillerGameMaster GM]] was wanting us to get back to investigating.\\
[[{{Munchkin}} Henderson]] instead bought enough gasoline to make about fifty [[MolotovCocktail Molotovs]], and we burned every one of those motherfuckers down that evening, before dropping off the kids at home for a good night's sleep.
-->-- ''Fanfic/OldManHenderson'', one of '''many''' examples of this trope

->''...And that's the story of how you went up the ''outside'' of the tower, because ''I'll never learn''.''
-->-- '''Johnny Chiodini''', ''WebVideo/{{Oxventure}}''
----