[[foldercontrol]]

[[folder:Comic Books]]

->'''Spider-Girl:''' Darkdevil! I was wondering when you'd deign to horn back into my life. ''Horn''. Get it?\\
'''Darkdevil:''' Very funny. I am suitably underwhelmed by your wit.
-->--''ComicBook/{{SpiderGirl}}''

[[/folder]]

[[folder:Comic Strips]]

->'''Dilbert''': Wally, would you like to be on my TTP project?\\
'''Wally''': What does "T.T.P." stand for?\\
'''Dilbert''': [[RecursiveAcronym It's short for]] '''T'''he '''T'''TP '''P'''roject. I named it myself. So... do you want to join?\\
'''Wally''': I'd rather be your archnemesis.
-->-- ''ComicStrip/{{Dilbert}}'', May 18, 1994

->''Though her husband often went on business trips, she hated to be left alone''\\
''"I've solved our problem", he said. "I've bought you a St. Bernard. It's name is Great Reluctance."''\\
''"Now, when I go away, you shall know that I am leaving you with Great Reluctance!"''\\
''She hit him with a waffle iron.''
-->-- ''ComicStrip/{{Peanuts}}''

[[/folder]]

[[folder:Fan Works]]

->'''Yang:''' Somebody's acting confident there. Don't get too cocky, otherwise you'll be getting a bad case of ''freezerburn.''\\
'''Nora:''' Booo.\\
'''Yang:''' Hey that was actually a good one!
-->-- ''Fanfic/JauneArcLordOfHunger'', "[[Recap/JauneArcLordOfHungerVytal Vytal]]"

->'''Salem:''' So, that's how it stands. Are you ready to round up a posse? I guess that'd make me a posse cat, but hey...\\
'''Archie:''' ''(groaning)'' A talking cat that makes bad puns. Why me, Lord? Don't answer that.
-->-- ''Fanfic/MaybeTheLastArchieStory''

[[/folder]]

[[folder:Film -- Animation]]

->'''Douche''': Okay, so...\\
'''Queso''': Did someone say 'Queso'?\\
'''Douche''': That's a fucking stretch and you know it, Queso!
-->--''WesternAnimation/SausageParty''

->'''Chi Fu''': Order, people, order!\\
'''Soldier''': I'll have a pan-fried noodle.\\
'''Chien-Po''': Ooh, ooh, sweet-and-pungent shrimp.\\
'''Soldier''': Moo goo gai pan.\\
'''Chi Fu''': That's not funny.
-->--''WesternAnimation/{{Mulan}}''

[[/folder]]

[[folder:Film -- Live-Action]]

->'''Brick Fields''': Now it's time to meet your maker, prepare to face the butcher baker, for tonight your ass it toast.\\
'''Millard Findlemeyer''': You gotta be shittin' me.
-->--''Film/TheGingerdeadMan''

[[/folder]]

[[folder:Literature]]

->The success of a pun is in the ''oy'' of the beholder.
-->-- ''Literature/CallahansCrosstimeSaloon''

->[[DontExplainTheJoke That was a Pune, or play on words.]]
-->-- [[RunningGag Several characters]], ''Literature/{{Discworld}}''

->'''Shallan:''' I think hanging people is a poor choice of professions for an executioner. Better to be the guy with an axe.\\
'''Kaladin:''' (''frowns'')\\
'''Shallan:''' You see, with the axe, it's easier to get ahead...\\
(''beat'')\\
'''Kaladin:''' Oh, storms. That was awful.\\
'''Shallan:''' No, it was ''funny''. You seem to get those two mixed up a lot. Don't worry. I'm here to help.
-->-- ''Literature/TheStormlightArchive: Literature/WordsOfRadiance''

->'''Enid:''' Are you planning to be like this through dinner tonight? Because I was going to roast the chicken, but I suppose there’s room for both of us to stew.
->'''Alexander:''' [[[{{Beat}} after a long pause]]] That pun was horrific.
->'''Enid:''' I know.
->'''Alexander:''' There should be a law.
->'''Enid:''' There probably is. But look: you're speaking to me. So if you choose to turn me over to the authorities, I'll go quietly, and feel that I have earned my punishment.
-->-- ''Literature/InCryptid'', "Target Practice"
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Live-Action TV]]

->'''Man-Bull:''' Do I look like a mechanic? My name is "''Man-Bull''" not "''Mechanical-Bull''"!\\
'''Alejandro:''' Wooow... How long have you been waiting to say that?\\
'''Jen:''' Yeah. That felt very forced.
-->-- ''Series/SheHulkAttorneyAtLaw'', "The Retreat"

->'''Sookie Stackhouse''': ''Fang''-tasia?\\
'''Bill Compton''': You have to remember that most [[BornInTheWrongCentury vampires are very old]]. Puns used to be the highest form of humor.
-->-- ''Series/TrueBlood''

->'''DJ''': Okay, we're gonna take a little fiver, so your MC can go pee.\\
(''brief moment of silence'')\\
'''DJ:''' ...That joke never gets a laugh.
-->-- ''Series/{{Victorious}}'', "Freak the Freak Out"

->'''C.J.:''' Duchamp was the father of Dadaism.\\
'''Toby:''' I know.\\
'''C.J.:''' The dada of Dada.\\
'''Toby:''' ...It's like there's nothing you can do about that joke, it's coming and you just have to stand there.
-->-- ''Series/TheWestWing''

[[/folder]]

[[folder:Tabletop Games]]

->The mini-markets attached to [[ToxicInc Endron]] [[GasStationOfDoom stations]] are called "End Runs." The pun is abominable, but it makes [[HonestJohnsDealership the wares sold within]] look that much better by comparison.
-->-- ''TabletopGame/WerewolfTheApocalypse - Subsidiaries: A Guide To Pentex''

[[/folder]]

[[folder:Theatre]]

->'''Commander Up:''' Well... at least we [[AllWebbedUp stuck together!]]\\
'''Everyone Else:''' (''CollectiveGroan'')
-->-- ''Theatre/{{Starship}}''

[[/folder]]

[[folder:Video Games]]

->''But it's great that you've come to the party, and you even brought me a present. I get to beat you into the ground just like I did last time. It's the gift that keeps on giving.''
-->-- '''Hero''' to Lionfang during the Frostval Events, ''VideoGame/AdventureQuestWorlds''

->'''Sek-Duat''': Once again, you prove what a nuisance you are, half-breed.\\
'''Zhoom''': It's good to see you too, mummy.\\
'''Hero''': I thought your mom was dead...\\
'''Sek-Duat''': Can we skip the puns this time?
-->-- ''VideoGame/AdventureQuestWorlds''

->''I got a chambered nautilus!\\
Who loses? Not us! Just go with it...''
-->-- '''PlayerCharacter''', ''VideoGame/AnimalCrossing: New Leaf''

->''Phew, Delphineus, your jokes make me sick! [[BlatantLies Oh, I'm just kidding. You're the best joke teller in the ocean.]]''
-->-- '''Adam''' to Delphnieus, ''[[VideoGame/{{Ecoquest}} Ecoquest: The Search for Cetus]]''

->'''Cat Burglar''': If you have four legs, you live. Two legs, you die.\\
'''Dweller''': What if you lost one leg after [[VideoGame/TheElderScrollsVSkyrim taking an arrow to the knee]]?\\
'''Cat Burglar''': You'll die for making that crossover joke!
-->-- ''VideoGame/FalloutShelter''

->'''Shez:''' I'll come with you to the monastery—but I'm not staying a single minute longer than I have to.\\
'''Alois:''' Bless you, my friend! What a noble soul you are! I'd say you saved my bacon, but that would be utterly ''hammy!''\\
'''Shez:''' ... Alois, has anyone ever told you that—\\
'''Arval:''' Don't. Some truths are simply too painful to bear. While I'm no expert, I fear the poor man's heart couldn't handle the shock.
-->-- ''VideoGame/FireEmblemWarriorsThreeHopes''

->'''Eugen:''' I've got an axe to grind with this one! No bones about it!\\
'''Io:''' No comment.\\
\\
'''Eugen:''' Credit where credit's due; it was no lazybones.\\
'''Io:''' Sigh.
-->-- ''VideoGame/GranblueFantasyRelink'', during and after a boss battle against a Gerasene on Dahli Island

->'''ComicBook/BlueBeetle:''' Bane of all existence.\\
'''ComicBook/{{Bane}}:''' [[SarcasmMode You are very funny.]]\\
'''Blue Beetle:''' And very angry.
-->-- ''VideoGame/Injustice2''

->'''Cheetah:''' Let's play a game, Quinn.\\
'''Harley Quinn:''' Nah, no fun playing with cheat-ahs!\\
'''Cheetah:''' I'll silence your puns...

->'''Harley Quinn''': Make like a tree, and ''leaf''!\\
'''Swamp Thing''': I hate that joke, Quinn.
-->-- ''VideoGame/Injustice2''

->'''Howard:''' That's a clever solution to a ''thorny'' problem.\\
'''Kreese:''' Wow, the shit you say sometimes makes me wanna smack you.
-->-- ''VideoGame/MadWorld'', after tossing a {{Mook}} onto a wall of spikes

->'''Triborg:''' We are Triborg, human...\\
'''Johnny Cage:''' More like ''Failborg!''\\
'''Triborg:''' PUN DETECTED. ERADICATE.

->'''Cassie Cage:''' Cage match.\\
'''Johnny Cage:''' You did ''not'' just say that.\\
'''Cassie Cage:''' [[DaddysGirl I am your daughter]].
-->-- ''VideoGame/MortalKombatX''

->'''Johnny Cage:''' Li, ''Mei'' I have this fight?\\
'''Li Mei:''' Ugh, that was criminal, Earthrealmer.

->'''Shang Tsung:''' Today your life goes up in smoke.\\
'''Smoke:''' Ugh, and people think you're clever?
-->-- ''VideoGame/MortalKombat1''

->'''Lettuce:''' LETTUCE be thankful that we have a new heir to the forest! HA HA HA HA!\\
'''Heart:''' That was a real knee-slapper!\\
'''Soul:''' Get out of my sight.
-->--''VideoGame/SomaSpirits''

->'''Sans:''' hey, take it easy. i've gotten a ''ton'' of work done today. a skele-''ton''. \\
(''camera zooms in, RimShot, Sans winks at the player'')\\
'''Papyrus:''' SANS!!!\\
'''Sans:''' come on. you're [[ActuallyPrettyFunny smiling]].\\
'''Papyrus:''' I AM AND I HATE IT!
-->-- ''VideoGame/{{Undertale}}''

->'''Lann:''' Hey, you know what they call a locomotive with fangs?\\
'''Tama:''' [[GenreSavvy I sense a bad the-joke coming]]...\\
'''Reynn:''' [[TemptingFate Honestly]], I'm more surprised [[BookDumb he knows the word "locomotive]]."\\
'''Lann:''' A "chew-chew" train. [[DontExplainTheJoke Because it's got fangs. Fangs that chew.]]\\
'''Reynn:''' I think I need a pillow to cry in.\\
'''Tama:''' There's just no hope for us any-the-more.
-->-- ''VideoGame/WorldOfFinalFantasy''

->''"Ah, the Outside Inn. My only regret during my last stay was not lodging my daggers in the little wag running the place. I swear, he laughs himself silly every time he says his establishment's insipid name."''
-->-- '''[[MurderInc Elam Drals]]''', ''VideoGame/TheElderScrollsOnline''
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Visual Novels]]
->'''Mary Anta:''' So, would you consider it a successful date?\\
'''Crowven:''' Oh yeah, totally! I mean, they looked ready to kill me by the end of it, but in the fun way, you know?\\
'''Mary:''' Kinda like how my Mom looks at Dad whenever he makes a bad pun?\\
'''Crowven:''' EX-ACT-LY!
-->--''VisualNovel/CemeteryMary''

->There's a special exhibit called "Gobblin' up Goblin Lore." I groan at the pun.
-->--'''Takayuki Nakamura''', ''VisualNovel/RootLetter''

->'''Kaoru Hazuki:''' Lettuce see if the turtle shell answer our prayer.\\
'''Akira Kijima:''' ...Think I lost some brain cells.\\
'''Kaoru Hazuki:''' Urk, don't look at me like that. It hurt me to say, too...
-->--''VisualNovel/SpiritHunterNG''

[[/folder]]

[[folder:Webcomics]]

->''If the Internet were an auditorium, I'd be on stage grinning proudly against [[CollectiveGroan a chorus of groans]].''
-->-- '''Chris Hastings''', creator of ''Webcomic/TheAdventuresOfDrMcNinja'' (AltText [[http://drmcninja.com/page.php?pageNum=40&issue=5 here]])

->'''[[PungeonMaster Dick Grayson]]''': Are you asking us to '''leaf''' you alone?
->'''[[GreenThumb Poison Ivy]]''': I'm not going to dignify that with a response.
-->--''Webcomic/BatmanWayneFamilyAdventures'', "Lesson Learned"

->'''Pinkie Pie:''' The whole party's here! Now we can have a '''party party!'''\\
'''Rarity:''' ... If this was my game, everyone would take [=1d4=] damage from that pun.
-->-- ''Webcomic/FriendshipIsDragons'' [[http://friendshipisdragons.thecomicseries.com/comics/31 #31]]

->''Ugh, that was horrible! I swear, I'm going to kill you, then pay a cleric to raise you, and kill you again, just to make you pay for the puns!''
-->-- '''Nale''', ''WebComic/TheOrderOfTheStick''

->It turns out that saying "Oh, so THAT'S why they call it Boxing Day" is a good way to get punched a second time.
-->-- '''AltText''' of ''Webcomic/{{xkcd}}'' [[https://www.xkcd.com/2089/ #2089]]

->'''Frigg:''' Fire elementals? You ''dick!''\\
'''Kobold Summoner:''' What's the matter? Afraid to [[PlayingWithFire play with]] ''[[PlayingWithFire fire]]?''\\
'''Frigg:''' Puns?! You '''''superdick!'''''
-->-- ''Webcomic/GuildedAge'' [[http://guildedage.net/comic/chapter-1-page-3/ Chapter 1, Page 3]]

->'''Sawtooth:''' It's a hat.\\
'''Dvorak:''' A detective hat! You wanted a method to keep your video feeds from [[EverythingIsOnline being public]]. It's a hot spot. You're in complete control of the feeds of anyone who links through this. You can broadcast them or cut them off entirely. If a client has a secret, you can keep it under your hat.\\
'''[[TheBigGuy Sawtooth]]:''' This is such a nice gift, [[SubvertedTrope I'm not even tempted to step on you for that pun]].
-->-- ''Webcomic/{{Freefall}}'' [[http://freefall.purrsia.com/ff2300/fc02287.htm #2287]]

->'''Mimic:''' Yoiks! Who're you? We don' wanna hurt youse!\\
'''Night Wight:''' I...was once...the White Knight. But now, I am... the Night Wight.\\
'''Mimic:''' A'ight, well...''now'' we wanna hurt youse.
-->-- ''Webcomic/RustyAndCo'', [[https://rustyandco.com/comic/5/ Chapter 1, Page 5]]

->'''Undine:''' Kokoro!!! Where were you?\\
'''Kokoro:''' I'm so sorry! A monster turned me into a ghost! A ghost... of ''[[Literature/AChristmasCarol Crimmus Present!]]''\\
''[Undine shoots Kokoro in the face with a jet of water]''\\
'''Kokoro:''' blurbleubleurbleurble
-->-- ''Webcomic/SleeplessDomain'', [[https://www.sleeplessdomain.com/comic/merry-crimmus-2021 "Merry Crimmus 2021!"]]
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Web Original]]

->''There isn't enough wah-wah music in the world to make up for that pun.''
-->-- '''[[WebVideo/AtopTheFourthWall Linkara]]''', on the "carried away" pun from ''Adventures of the Kool-Aid Man #1''

->'''Chris''': This is the part where we find out that Creator/BenjaminBratt's character’s name is DETECTIVE TOM LONE.\\
'''David''': That’s appropriate for the character, because as he later says, he's a loner!\\
'''Chris''': And Tom, like a male cat!\\
'''David''': Oh my God, I didn't even think of that. I mean, I'm GLAD I didn't think of that.\\
'''Chris''': I heard the guy that named the cop in the [[Franchise/AceAttorney Phoenix Wright]] games "Detective Dick Gumshoe" walked out of the theater in disgust when he heard that name.
-->-- '''Chris Sims''' and '''David Uzumeri''' [[http://comicsalliance.com/catwoman-movie-review-2/ on]] ''Film/Catwoman2004''

->''I'm not sure why, exactly, but I find this ''ComicStrip/BeetleBailey'' particularly insulting. Look, General Halftrack is hunched over with rage and he's pouring booze down his throat, OK? And his wife is falling all over herself apologizing for planning some sort of basic interaction with other humans. The General doesn't want to go. We get it. You don't have to name them "the Borrings" to emphasize that General Halftrack will, in fact, be bored (borred?) when he has dinner with them. I never thought I'd hold up ''[[ComicStrip/Blondie1930 Blondie]]'' as some sort of paragon of efficient, naturalistic narrative in SequentialArt storytelling, but, well, Blondie managed to pull this off without giving the off-screen hateful family a name that telegraphed their function.''
-->-- '''Blog/TheComicsCurmudgeon''' [[http://joshreads.com/?p=3213 on]] ''ComicStrip/BeetleBailey''

->'''Maxwell:''' We've reached peak pun.\\
'''Ferr:''' Well, I'm gonna continue anyway because I'm a ''punk''. (''punch'') Oww! I'm sorry I'm not a fan of... ''slapstick''. (''punch'') Owwww!\\
(''the others start laughing'')\\
'''Ferr:''' I find your enforcement rather... ''heavy-handed''. (''punch/laughing'') Owwww, dammit! I'm sorry I don't appreciate your... ''punch-line!'' (''multi-punch'') Goddamn it! You really... ''bruised my ego!'' (''laughing and punching'') Oh, now it really hurts! (''hysterical laughter'') ''Yeaaaaah!''
-->-- The '''LetsPlay/FreelanceAstronauts''' playing ''[[Videogame/TheLegendOfZeldaOcarinaOfTime Ocarina of Time: Master Quest]]''

->'''Arin:''' Why does [[Franchise/SonicTheHedgehog Sonic]] [[SpecialEffectsFailure just never have a shadow?]]\\
'''Jon:''' ...Well.\\
'''Arin:''' [[OhCrap Oh—oh don't even.]]\\
'''Jon:''' [[Videogame/SonicAdventure2 Well]].\\
'''Arin:''' Don't. ''Don't.''\\
'''Jon:''' [[Videogame/ShadowTheHedgehog WELL]].\\
'''Arin:''' Okay, please. Please. Jon, I'll give you a dollar if you ''don't go there.''
-->-- ''WebVideo/GameGrumps'', playing ''VideoGame/SonicTheHedgehog2006''

->'''Jon:''' Honestly this game would be 50% better if it wasn't for the loading screens. Bearable at the very least.\\
'''Arin:''' No, I don't think any bears would play this game.\\
'''Jon:''' ...Aggggaha!\\
'''Arin:''' It has to have some sort of honey.\\
'''Jon:''' No no no!\\
'''Arin:''' Or salmon.\\
'''Jon:''' No, you don't start the day off with some fucking ''bear'' pun!\\
'''Arin:''' I don't care.\\
'''Jon:''' [[HypocriticalHumor I can't BEAR it!]]
-->-- ''WebVideo/GameGrumps'' playing more ''VideoGame/SonicTheHedgehog2006''

->'''Joke of the year award winner:''' I want to thank the writing team, who didn't want to be here today.\\
'''Writer:''' Shut up!
-->-- '''WebVideo/JoueurDuGrenier''' after a skit about the Sheik Point

->'''Lindsay:''' anyone got any more horse puns?\\
'''Kidn:''' Nay.
-->-- ''[[LetsPlay/AchievementHunterMinecraftSeries Let's Build]]'', [[http://youtu.be/m-o8SOudLlU "Gerudo Shooting Gallery"]]

->'''Chick''': Nobody likes puns, Disney, come on...\\
'''Nella''': (''miserably'') Nella likes puns.\\
'''Chick''': As I was saying, nobody likes puns.\\
'''Nella''': (''slinks away like a beaten dog'')
-->-- ''WebVideo/TheNostalgiaChick''

->''Annnnnnnd cue FacePalm!''
-->-- '''Creator/TheQuarterGuy'''

->''GOD DAMMIT, BARB!''
-->-- '''Burnie Burns''' of Creator/RoosterTeeth

->For example, some of the puns the creators use are wretched enough to serve as arguments for the death penalty (I really think they could have found a better name for the bottomless "[[Franchise/{{Frankenstein}} Frank N's Stein]]").
-->-- [[http://www.rpg.net/news+reviews/reviews/rev_3161.html This]] review of ''TabletopGame/SenZar''

->'''Ruby''': I'm talking about kicking off the semester with a bang.\\
'''Yang''': I always kick my semesters off with a ''Yang''! Eh?... Guys?... Am I right? (''gets hit with a thrown tomato'')\\
'''Nora''': Booooo!
-->-- ''WebAnimation/{{RWBY}}'' (for bonus points, Yang's voice actor is the aforementioned Barbara Dunkleman])

->''"Laughter just didn't seem appropriate."''
-->-- '''Stampy''', ''[[WebVideo/{{Stampylongnose}} Quest]]''

->'''Kaiser''': You thought Freeza was cool. Huh? Huh?\\
'''Lani''': His brother's ''Cooler''.\\
'''Taka:''' (''groans and vomits'')\\
'''Lani''': Get ready for that about twenty more times during that movie. We literally have that line in there twenty times, and we haven't even written it yet.
-->-- ''Creator/TeamFourStar Podcast Episode 2''

->'''Nash''': Ugh, not another pun! The deepest circles of hell are reserved for people who make bad puns.\\
'''Tara''': I'm pretty sure when I get to the pearly gates the puns are going to be the least of my worries
-->-- ''WebVideo/WhatTheFuckIsWrongWithYou'' on ''WebVideo/RadioDeadAir''

->The Qasalan officials have offered some splendid new rewards for expelling those pesky Scarabs this year. Were they cast far enough away, though? One pesky journalist described the problem as 'unde-scarab-le'... She was almost fired for it.
-->-- ''Website/{{Neopets}}'', Year 21 Neopies, "Best Prize Pool Update"

->'''Audrey Jr.:''' ''(smashes a record)'' Now I know what they mean by "hit" records.\\
'''Mr. Enter:''' I wanted you guys to see that, not because it's important to anything about this episode, but because it is legitimately the worst pun that I've ever heard. ''That I have EVER HEARD.''
-->--''WebVideo/TheMysteriousMrEnter'', Animated Atrocities #102: "I Loathe a Parade" [WesternAnimation/LittleShop Cartoon]

->'''Sarge:''' I'll be Secret Agent Double Ohio. License to be tall in the middle, and round on both ends.\\
'''Simmons:''' And I'll be Agent Denial. (laughing) It's because... a state of denial, like the saying? You know, it's like a... I was, you know, the whole State/state thing? You know it's a... joke.\\
'''Grif:''' No dude, jokes are funny.
-->-- ''WebAnimation/RedVsBlue: Revelation'', Episode 8: "Perusing the Archive"

->'''Fundy:''' No one's been here yet, you're right! ''(Ranboo kills a cow)'' And now we've just made them extinct, okay.\\
'''Ranboo:''' Heh, get it? [[{{Pun}} A miSTEAK]]?\\
''({{Beat}})''\\
'''Fundy:''' I regret bringing you.\\
'''Ranboo:''' Yeah, I regret coming!
-->-- ''WebVideo/DreamSMP''

->''So now, it's finally time to answer the question -- can the long-running series finally hunt down ''this'' monster, or did ''Rise'' have me saying "Why, Vern?" ... V-Vern, Vern is the guy at Best Buy who, uh, sells me my games. Like "wyvern"? ... I'm sorry. I'm so- I'm ''so'' sorry. It's so bad, I'm so sorry. Oh..."''
-->--'''WebVideo/{{Arlo}}''', opening the [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0eP_WfTCVQQ review of]] ''VideoGame/MonsterHunterRise''

->'''[[UsefulNotes/AbrahamLincoln Lincoln]]:''' You are bold, Grant, I'll GRANT you that.\\
I'm promoting you to general-in-chief and I ain't taking you for GRANTED!\\
Now I want you to go defeat Lee. GRANT me my wish!\\
'''[[UsefulNotes/UlyssesSGrant Grant]]:''' ''Please stop.''
-->--''{{WebAnimation/OverSimplified}},'' "The American Civil War"

->''"Because if you know anything about me, you would know that I vehemently despise puns so much to the point where I would even call it a personality trait. This ride in and of itself is probably like a run of the mill six out of ten, not bad. But this dude spit out his corny-ass, Laffy-Taffy-ass humor on a rapid fire for ten minutes of psychological torture. He kept repeating [[DidntWeUseThisJokeAlready the same joke about elephants having better memories]] which, haha, sure, repetition, I get it. But then he used the same joke about bamboo TWICE! I don't know why God is frowning upon me today, but like, HAVEN'T I BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH!?"''
-->--'''WebVideo/{{Alpharad}}''', on ''Ride/{{Jungle Cruise}}''
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Western Animation]]

->''Riddle me this: What happens when you fill an empty eggshell with nitro? It becomes an egg-splosive! Uhuhuhuhuh!''
-->-- '''The Riddler''', ''WesternAnimation/TheAdventuresOfBatman''

->'''Terry''': You're sure about this?\\
'''Bruce''': Everything they steal is tied to playing card suits.\\
'''Terry''': How does the yacht fit in?\\
'''Bruce''': It was part of a yacht ''club''.\\
'''Terry''': [[SuckinessIsPainful Ouch.]]
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/BatmanBeyond''

->''Car-los!''
-->-- The Entire Class, repeatedly and frequently, ''WesternAnimation/TheMagicSchoolBus''

->'''[=SpongeBob=]:''' (''hanging on a wall'') Hi, Mr. Krabs.\\
'''Mr. Krabs:''' [=SpongeBob=], what are you doing? \\
'''[=SpongeBob:=]''' Oh, you know, just hanging around. \\
'''Patrick:''' Boo!
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/SpongeBobSquarePants'', "Wet Painters"

->'''Xandir:''' Looks like (Strawberry Sweetcake)'ll be spending a choco-''lot'' of time behind candy ''bars!''\\
''[[{{beat}} (everybody just stares at Xandir while he has the proudest look on his face)]]''\\
'''Clara:''' God damn it, I hate you...
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/DrawnTogether'', "The One Wherein There is a Big Twist, Part II"

->'''Cat Noir:''' Hey Ice Queen, what's with all the terrorizing? Why don't you pick on someone your own temperature?\\
'''Stormy Weather:''' My name is not Ice Queen! It's Stormy Weather!\\
'''Cat Noir:''' Listen, I'm ''feline'' more generous than usual today. So cool down and we'll call it quits, 'kay?\\
''(Stormy Weather gets a deadpan look on her face, then hits Cat with a blast of wind)''
-->--''WesternAnimation/MiraculousLadybug'', "Stormy Weather"

->'''Mac:''' Alright guys, let's ''Bloo'' this!\\
[''music stops'']\\
'''Wilt:''' ''Aw'', man. I'm sorry, that is ''not'' okay.\\
'''Edwardo:''' Muy stinko.\\
'''Coco:''' Co-co!\\
'''Terrence:''' Aheheheh, laammmeee! That's even more stupider than me!\\
'''Bloo:''' He's right! "Let's Bloo this"? Come on man, that is really stu[pid].
-->--''WesternAnimation/FostersHomeForImaginaryFriends'', "WesternAnimation/HouseOfBloos"
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Real Life]]

->''Puns are little "plays on words" that a certain breed of person loves to spring on you and then look at you in a certain self-satisfied way to indicate that he thinks that ''you'' must think that he is by far the cleverest person on Earth now that Benjamin Franklin is dead, when in fact what you are thinking is that if this person ever ends up in a lifeboat, the other passengers will hurl him overboard by the end of the first day even if they have plenty of food and water.''
-->-- '''Creator/DaveBarry''', "Why Humor Is Funny"

->''The 1998 Oscars, I found myself in a bathroom next to Creator/TomSelleck. So I leaned over and said, "Looks like we're a couple of ''peeing Toms!''" His [[DeathGlare angry silence]] is something I'll never forget.''
-->--'''Creator/TomHanks'''

->Pun (n.): the lowest form of humour.
-->-- '''Samuel Johnson'''

->Even the member of a theatre audience who thinks some such pun as referring to the Tennessee city noted for its imbecile censorship as "non compos Memphis" is amusing feels it nevertheless incumbent upon him to shudder and dismiss it as beneath contempt.
-->-- '''George Jean Nathan'''

->"Someone should make a frisbee with the picture of a 14th century English poet on it. It'd be a...Flying [[Creator/GeoffreyChaucer Chaucer]]."\\
"...GOD DAMMIT."
-->-- Anon

[[/folder]]

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