->''And here's to the girls who just watch.\\
Aren't they the best?\\
When they get depressed, it's a bottle of Scotch\\
Plus a little jest.\\
Another chance to disapprove,\\
Another brilliant zinger.\\
Another reason not to move,\\
Another vodka stinger.\\
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa-- I'll drink to that.''
-->-- '''Joanne''', ''[[Theatre/CompanySondheim Company]]'', "The Ladies Who Lunch"

->''Stritch!\\
All my co-stars cry out, "Put on your shoes!"\\
Stritch!\\
Who the hell drank all the booze?\\
And when I get drunk, the audience applauds!\\
Stritch!\\
Stritch, Stritch, Stritch!\\
I'm the queen of Broadway's boozing broads!''
-->-- ''Theatre/ForbiddenBroadway'', "Stritch"

->'''Julia:''' Hi, Richard! ''(She lifts her glass in drunken salute)''\\
'''Richard:''' ''(in a low tone)'': Will you stop drinking?\\
'''Julia:''' ''(in a voice just as high as his was low)'': Will I stop drinking? No, I won't stop drinking!
-->-- ''Theatre/MerrilyWeRollAlong'' (play by George S. Kaufman & Moss Hart)

->'''Frank:''' So what do you do?\\
'''Mary:''' I drink.\\
'''Frank:''' No, what do you ''really'' do?\\
'''Mary:''' I ''really'' drink.
-->-- ''Theatre/MerrilyWeRollAlong'' (TheMusical)

->''"Think I want to go to the bars? Think they're any fun? Well, they're better than being alone, aren't they? Look at me, blind again. I'm stiff. All right, so I meant to be... Funny, I don't get hangovers any more. I've just got a running one that lasts all the time."''
-->-- '''Mildred Tynan''', ''The Ladies in the Corridor''

->'''Michael:''' You seem more villainous than usual today, Mom -- are you sober?\\
'''Lucille:''' Michael, it's 8 a.m.\\
'''Michael:''' So it's not that...
-->--''Series/ArrestedDevelopment''

->''Mater is not "frantic." [[DeadpanSnarker Only the prospect of the decanter running dry could make Mater frantic]].''
-->--'''Robert Frobisher,''' ''Literature/CloudAtlas''

->'''Suleiman''': What's the matter with Cook, Matron?
->'''Matron''': Oh, er, sh-she's ill.
->'''Dandy Big''': "Ill"? Are you kiddin'? She's ''plastered!''
-->-- ''Film/NoKidding''
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