->''I take a look at my enormous penis\\
And my troubles start a-meltin' away\\
I take a look at my enormous penis\\
And the happy times are comin' to stay\\
I gotta sing and dance when I glance in my pants\\
And the feeling's like a sunshiney day\\
I take a look at my enormous pe-e-e-nis\\
And everything is goin' my way''
-->--'''Da Vinci's Notebook''', ''Enormous Penis''

->''"Take about five dozen eggs, start putting them in a bowl, mix the FUCK out of them and what do you get? '''PENIS!'''"''
-->-- ''WebAnimation/AwesomeSeries'', "Awesome Man"

->"You hear those dick pill ads, and they’re all like, 'If you have an erection lasting for more than four hours, consult a doctor.' It should read: 'If you have an erection lasting for more than four hours, consult a bunch of sexy ladies and high-five your penis!'\\
You ever read mythology? Look back at those old gods and you’ll see ‘em sporting dangerous, unholy wood. Their cocks are basically baseball bats studded with thorns and snaked with vines and tipped with antlers—it’s erectile divinity. We could all only aspire to have that in real life.\\
Well, in the World of Darkness, you can. You can be a werewolf with a giant mythic erection. You can be a vampire with a majestic pale pillar of undead man-meat. You can be a Promethean with a hundred turgid wangs stitched together to create an uber-wang crackling with nascent electricity.\\
Your tumescence is legendary."
-->--'''[[TabletopGame/NewWorldOfDarkness World of Darkness]]''', ''Dudes of Legend''

-> ''"Even you won't be able to [[DoubleEntendre beat off]] this magnificent schlong."''
-->--'''The Terminal Guardian''', ''VideoGame/ShinMegamiTenseiIV'', as he summons Mara

->When ''Oedipus'' appeared at London’s National Theatre in 1968, the set was decorated by a gigantic golden phallus 30 feet high. Actress Carol Browne saw it and commented, “Well it’s no-one I know.” Another giant phallus (beige this time) was used in a 1979 production of Aristophanes’ ''Lysistrata'' staged in Cambridge, Massachusetts USA. Mid-way through the opening performance the wires supporting the phallus gave way and, as if in a symbolic gesture, it fell right across the stage knocking the leading lady to the ground.
-->From '''Great Theatrical Disasters''' by Glyes Brandret.

->''Tary is examining a [[ItMakesSenseInContext naked portrait of]] [[TheBigGuy Grog]] that his RobotBuddy Doty drew:''\\
'''Tary:''' Doty, [Pike] said ''realism.''\\
* ''Doty nods''*\\
'''Tary:''' ''Really?''\\
* ''Doty nods again''*\\
'''Tary:''' How does he ''walk?''\\
'''Percy:''' With confidence and pride.

->'''Lois:''' What's wrong, honey?
->'''Peter:''' I'll tell you what's wrong: I'm trying to make love to you [[ParentalIncest and you're thinking about Chris!]]
->'''Lois:''' Peter, i-is there something you need to tell me?
->'''Peter:''' Thanks to you, our son has a huge wang!
->'''Lois:''' Thanks to ''me?''
->'''Peter:''' Well, he didn't get it from me!
->'''Lois:''' What are you talking about?!
->'''Peter:''' I'll ''show'' you.
->''(they go into Chris' room while he's asleep)''
->'''Peter:''' Alright, stand back, Lois. ''(lifts up the covers)''
->'''Lois:''' ''Oh my.'' Well, no wonder he's always slouching.
->'''Peter:''' How the hell did this happen? ''I'm'' supposed to be the man of the house! You must be so ashamed of me.
->'''Lois:''' Oh, Peter, I care as much about the size of your penis as you care about the size of my breasts.
->'''Peter:''' [[ComplimentBackfire OH MY GOD!]]
-->--''WesternAnimation/FamilyGuy'', "And the Wiener Is..."