[[folder:Film -- Live-Action]]

->Uh, waitaminute, what about this: What if they're eating in an ''airplane'', and they cross a timezone? I mean, it's always midnight somewhere! Hehehe! ([[TakeThatAudience gets mauled by Mohawk]])
-->--'''Technician''', ''Film/Gremlins2TheNewBatch''

->'''Glen:''' Well shit, man, I guess that's why they call it a "way-homer."\\
'''Hi:''' Why's that?\\
'''Glen:''' Cause you only get it on the way home.
->-- ''Film/RaisingArizona''


[[folder:Film -- Animated]]

->I see now that my plan didn't make much sense.
-->-- '''Noah''', ''WesternAnimation/TheMissingLynx''



->'''Melvin:''' It makes sense, if you ''think'' about it!\\
'''M:''' No it doesn't.
-->-- ''Literature/UnrealEstate''


[[folder:Live-Action TV]]

->'''Richard Castle''': Perfect place for a murder. No one can hear you scream.\\
'''Kate Beckett''': No one can help you carry the body up the stairs either.\\
'''Richard Castle''': Maybe somebody marched Donny at gunpoint down to the river and killed him there.\\
'''Kate Beckett''': If he had a gun, why would he use a bottle [to kill the victim]?\\
'''Richard Castle''': Don't ruin my story with your logic!
-->-- ''Series/{{Castle}}'', "The Last Call"

->Wait a minute. How did they open the car door?
-->--'''Rimmer'''[[note]]referring to a pair of sentient shoes[[/note]], '''Series/RedDwarf'''

->''(Asked what the quote "It was the most excruciating experience of my life" referred to.)''\\
'''Andy Parsons''': Is it David Blunkett[[note]]a British politician, who is blind[[/note]] hanging pictures? ''[He mimes hitting his thumb with a hammer]''\\
'''Dara O'Briain''': I get that he'd drive the nail into his thumb because he's blind, but why is he hanging pictures? He's blind!



->''So this is my cassette I'm sending you, I hope you hear it\\
I'm in the car right now, I'm doing 90 on the freeway\\
Hey Slim, I drank a fifth of vodka, you dare me to drive?\\
Well, gotta go, I'm almost at the bridge now\\
Oh shit, I forgot, how am I supposed to send this shit out?''
-->--'''Music/{{Eminem}},''' ''Stan''



->Seeing the film the first time, I was swept away, and have remained swept ever since. Seeing this restored version, I tried to be more objective...it is remarkable that the Empire marksmen [[ImperialStormtrooperMarksmanshipAcademy never hit anyone important.]]
-->-- '''Creator/RogerEbert''' reviews the Special Edition of ''Film/ANewHope''.

->Which if you think about it rationally is absurd, but you get too involved to think rationally
-->-- '''Creator/RogerEbert''' on ''{{Film/Signs}}''.



->It's charming until you realize how many [[BigBrotherIsWatching hidden cameras]] this guy must have set up to [[CovertPervert get all this footage.]]
-->--'''Bill Corbett''' Podcast/RiffTrax: ''Film/BatmanAndRobin''


[[folder: Stand-Up Comedy]]
->''There's one line in one scene at the start of the movie to explain the entire apocalypse. And it's not even repeated or alluded to. Just one line... It's India. It's a monsoon. A man arrives, clearly in a hurry. He's wearing a suit. He's got a small bag. He's rushed to be here. He's a scientist, he's meeting another scientist. [...] This guy, a physicist, turns to the other physicist and without any shame or compunction goes: "The neutrinos have mutated'' and they're heating up the planet''!"''\\
''[Insert [[ArtisticLicensePhysics lengthy rant about how scientifically impossible]] this is.]''\\
''At the end of the movie, they're on a boat. It's a new dawn. Everyone's survived. Everyone in the cinema got up and walked out. I was the only idiot in the Curzon on Leicester Square with his arm up going "Eh,'' what happened to the fucking neutrinos''?!" A week ago, they had "mutated and were heating up the planet"; how did ''that'' change all of a sudden?''
-->'''Creator/DaraOBriain''' is not fond of ''Film/TwoThousandTwelve''


[[folder:Video games]]

->'''Mobster 1''': Take Vampire movies. Why are they always set in L.A. or Mexico? They can't even get a tan. If I was a bloodsucker, I'd move to the North Pole. Winter's one looong night.\\
'''Mobster 2''': Yeah, what would ya eat? suck blood from Pengiuns?\\
'''Mobster 1''': Nah. Eskimos, man, Eskimos.


[[folder:Web Animation]]

->By the time you figure out what was wrong with that, it won't matter anymore!
-->--'''Sauron''', ''[[http://onering.legendaryfrog.com/movies_orse_w.php One Ring to Rule Them All Special Edition]]''

->'''Seppel''': "Wait a minute! What was [[WesternAnimation/ThePowerpuffGirls Professor Utonium]] doing making little girls in the first place?!"\\
'''Misteroo''': "Ew."
-->--''WebAnimation/{{Arfenhouse}} Teh Movie Too''



->Scooby, sure. But a whole ''race'' of [[TalkingAnimal talking Great Danes]]? [[Theatre/{{Hamlet}} Something is rotten in the State of Denmark.]]''
-->--'''[[AuthorAvatar Me]]''' on [[ScoobyDoo Scrappy Doo]], ''Webcomic/IrregularWebcomic''

->Ok, well it's not like it's that important. Just a super obvious thing that'll probably occur to you later when you're looking in the fridge you don't have, at which point you'll feel like an idiot.
-->--'''Dirk Strider''', ''Webcomic/{{Homestuck}}''

->'''Gabe:''' How can you say the [[{{WesternAnimation/Superfriends}} Wonder Twins]] was about [[BrotherSisterIncest incest]]? I mean, just because he [[MakingASplash turns]] into water, and then she [[VoluntaryShapeshifting turns into an elephant]], and then... Then they... They... Oh My God. And the monkey! Where does the monkey fit in?\\
'''Tycho:''' The monkey ''watches''.
-->-- ''Webcomic/PennyArcade'', "[[http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2002/06/12/ Activate]]"

->I know I shouldn't, but I can't help but wonder how creatures without arms could make such a device. Or tie up my friends.
-->--'''Antimony''', ''Webcomic/GunnerkriggCourt''


[[folder:Web Original]]

->When the lights go on, Ben sees a horde of hundreds and hundreds of Spider-man clones, all in cute little matching Spider-man costumes. You know, where did the Jackal find time or resources to mass-produce the costume? For that matter, where are all these Spider-men using the bathroom? I hate to think the answer might be 'in the corners of the room.'
-->--'''''Blog/ToplessRobot''''', [[http://www.toplessrobot.com/2008/11/the_13_dumbest_spiderman_storiesjust_from_the_clon.php "The 13 Dumbest Spider-Man Stories]]... Just From ''ComicBook/TheCloneSaga''"

->The all-concrete room you're in suddenly erupts into flames. (I don't know how either, but go with me) The fire doors slam shut locking you in with the flames.\\\
A: Notify someone in order to have the strangely designed doors opened.\\
B: Crack the glass and stick a hose through it with which you can put out the flames\\
C: Go to a linen closet, [[ChainsawGood find a chainsaw]] (!) and proceed to saw through the two inch thick steel fire doors, thereby freeing you.\\\
Well obviously the answer is C. Everybody knows that chainsaws are in abundance on a cruise ship, I mean, trees can come out of nowhere in the ocean. And everybody also knows they'll cut through two inch steel like paper. Duh!
-->--'''Chris Parry''' on ''Film/Speed2CruiseControl''

->I think people heard about Creator/KevinCostner drinking his own distilled pee in ''Waterworld'' and ran for the hills... nobody wants to see the guy from ''Film/FieldOfDreams'' drinking his wee-wee. I puzzle over it myself. If he has a machine that can distill urine into drinking water, why can't he just purify sea water? After much thinking, I finally decided that he prefers warm drinks.
-->--'''[[WebVideo/TheSpoonyExperiment Noah Antwiler]]''' [[http://spoonyexperiment.com/cutthroat-island/ on]] ''Film/{{Waterworld}}''

->'''David:''' We then discover Sharon Stone has been given superpowers by the beauty cream when she yells at George until he slaps her.\\
'''Chris''': Catwoman and Sharon Stone then have this big karate fight, which makes sense because Catwoman used her cat powers to beat the living hell out of four gigantic armed robbers in the first half of the movie, but that’s okay because Sharon Stone has an invulnerable [[WhatKindOfLamePowerIsHeartAnyway face and neck]]. Twenty-eight writers.
-->-- Chris Sims and David Uzumeri [[http://comicsalliance.com/catwoman-movie-review/ on]] ''Film/{{Catwoman}}'' (2004)

->There's an awkward scene in [[Recap/DoctorWhoS1E2TheDaleks The Daleks]] talking about the TARDIS food dispenser and how it makes energy bars that taste just like the real objects. And it made sense, except for being really stupid and pointless and tedious. But here, the ship, quite frankly, goes a bit mad, starting early in the episode with a long shot in which we can clearly see that the food dispenser has separate buttons for water and... [[ASpotOfTea milk]]. This is absolutely fantastic. Because of course alien species love bovine lactation.
-->-- '''Dr. Phil Sandifer''' [[http://www.eruditorumpress.com/blog/a-far-wider-academy-of-which-human-nature-is-merely-a-part-the-edge-of-destruction/ on]] ''Series/DoctorWho'', "[[Recap/DoctorWhoS1E3TheEdgeOfDestruction The Edge of Destruction]]"

->'''Chris:''' The government wants to figure out how to [[CapeBusters turn Clark’s powers off and on]], which is fine. That makes sense and follows logically. But to accomplish this, they have “turned off neural pathways” so that he can’t access his powers, which.. What? Does Clark have to THINK about being invulnerable to make it happen?\\
'''David''': Haha, that’s a good point! He should just be walking around destroying everything in his path, like Lennie from ''Literature/OfMiceAndMen''. Hugging Lois and she comically pops open. The episode ending with Ollie mercy-killing Clark with a Kryptonite arrow.
-->--''[[http://comicsalliance.com/recap-smallville-episode-10-12-collateral/ ComicsAlliance]]'' on ''Series/{{Smallville}}'' ("Collateral")

->The episode starts with Lex complaining to his campaign manager that Jonathan Kent is neck and neck with Lex... Lois says 'Look! We're about to put out about eighteen million dollars worth of advertisement! Isn't that great!'\\\
Jonathan, [[WorkingClassHero dutifully ratcheting]], replies, 'Yeah! Shore is, puddin'! But how's we all affordin' that there telly vision?'\\\
Lois: '[[Film/ANewHope These aren't the droids you're looking for!]]'\\\
Jonathan: '[[Film/ReturnOfTheJedi I will take you to Jabba now. I am a good worker, and will be rewarded.]][='=]
-->--'''Neal Bailey''' [[http://www.supermanhomepage.com/tv/tv.php?topic=reviews/smallville5-ep11 on]] ''{{Series/Smallville}}'' ("Lockdown")

->It's a lot like the iron boots in modern 3D ''[[Franchise/TheLegendOfZelda Zelda]]'' games: you have these 200kg boots in your inventory; you're swimming in water; you open the menu and choose to put the boots 'on'; you sink to the bottom of the water. Are the boots only heavy when they're on your feet? (Maybe [[AWizardDidIt they're magical]].)
-->--'''Tim Rogers''', on ''[[http://www.actionbutton.net/?p=402 Ikaruga]]''


[[folder:Web Video]]

->Wait a second, if their mission is to proliferate their DNA through procreation, why is there [[TokenMinority a gay guy]] in the group?!
-->-- '''[[WebVideo/AtopTheFourthWall Linkara]]''' on ''New Guardians''

->Y'know, come to think of it, if the Jedi had just one ([[TheMainCharactersDoEverything or two, or three, or four, or five, or six, or seven]]) Jedis back to them with Naboo, they might've actually ''captured'' Darth Maul and figured out who he was workin' for. Can you imagine the look on his face when he opened the door and is like, "IMMA FUCKIN BADASS--" (sees Jedi army), and then he's like, "--Ohhh. ''Oh.'' How do you close these doors? Is it this button? [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere OK there it goes.]]"
-->--'''[[WebVideo/RedLetterMedia Harry S. Plinkett]]''' on ''Film/AttackOfTheClones''

->Why would the ''Prometheus'' crew agree to go on a four-year mission when they're not even briefed on what the mission is until the mission starts? What if the mission [[BoldlyComing involved a gang-bang?]]
-->--'''''[[WebVideo/HalfInTheBag Half in the Bag]]''''' [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-x1YuvUQFJ0 on]] ''Film/{{Prometheus}}''

->''This'' is what it's all about! We brought it back to Earth, where the dangers are more advanced! [beat] They're the ''same'' dangers, but...evolved to even more effectively kill humans! Who haven't actually been there for 1,000 years! I'm fairly confident that [[HollywoodEvolution things can evolve to kill other things that they don't share a planet with.]]
-->--''Film/AfterEarth'' - [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6dxAZD7Wr_M M. Knight Deleted Commentary]]

-> '''Android 17''': Holy shit, you're an android! How did you even do that?
-> '''Dr. Gero''': I took my brain out and put it into this body.
-> '''Android 18''':..''How?''
-> '''Dr. Gero''': I...huh. How did I do that?

->How the hell does that guy owe money?! He has a magic lever that can force people to lose everything! Marry into money? ''Why?!'' You have God's personal money tree! Th-Th-There's not even any complicated controls! It's just "Win" and "Lose"! Is it only targeted to Fred?! Can it be targeted to other people?! Is there a remote-controlled chip inside everybody's mind that he somehow has control over that can win or lose or...?! This whole movie should be about ''how that lever works!''
-->--'''WebVideo/TheNostalgiaCritic''' on the villain of ''Film/TheFlintstonesInVivaRockVegas''


[[folder:Western animation]]

->The longer we stand here, the more people are going to question how a fisherman with no engineering background was able to build a sophisticated talking fish robot.
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/FamilyGuy''

->''[Zoidberg's underwater house has just burnt down]''\\
'''Zoidberg''': [[BigNo Nooooooo!]] My home! It burned down! How did this happen?\\
'''Hermes''': That's a very good question.\\
'''Bender''': ''[Retrieving a lit cigar from the ashes]'' So that's where my I left my cigar.\\
'''Hermes''': [[VoodooShark That just raises further questions!]]
--> --''WesternAnimation/{{Futurama}}''

->Wait a second... if the pit is bottomless, how exactly are you going to fill it with water?
-->-- '''[[HypercompetentSidekick Shego]]''', ''WesternAnimation/KimPossible''

->''[Chowder accidentally puts rat poison in the dish he's making]''\\
'''Mung''': Oh, golly... Why did I even put that poison in the spice cabinet in the first place?!\\
''[A giant rat passes by]''\\
'''Mung''': ...Oh, yeah, that's right...
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/{{Chowder}}''


[[folder:Real Life]]

->As Zack admits to the scam, Major Slater produces a (disarmed) hand grenade and [[ScareEmStraight pulls the pin]], causing Zack to dive for cover... but with his life in immediate danger, why didn't he [[FourthWallObserver call a Time-Out?]] No, Millard, stop it. Don't think about it, or you'll drive yourself crazy.
-->--'''Stuart Millard''' on ''Series/SavedByTheBell'' ("Aloha Slater"), ''So Excited, So Scared''