->'"Prince Chid is my son... What? My genes are just recessive, that's all. [[BlatantLies All of them.]]"
-->-- '''The Duke of Fried''', ''WebVideo/VisionOfEscaflowneAbridged''

->''(Mary has just given birth to what might be an extraterrestrial baby)''\\
'''Mary:''' What color is it?\\
'''Bob:''' Well, is there something you'd like to tell us?\\
'''Jodie:''' We're not sure yet.\\
'''Bob:''' That's not usually the first question.\\
'''Chuck:''' Bob...\\
'''Bob:''' That's not usually the ''twelfth'' question!
-->-- ''{{Series/Soap}}''

->"I think she [Mrs. Pepper] was seeing another shaker. You don't get paprika from salt and pepper. That ho was cheating!"
-->-- '''Young David''' going on a tangent about ''WesternAnimation/BluesClues'', ''WebAnimation/CampCamp'' blooper reel

->"This only what I see. Like the patriarchs of old our men live all in one house with their wives and their concubines, and the [[ChildByRape mulattoes]] one sees in every family exactly resemble the white children—and every lady tells you who is the father of all the mulatto children in everybody's household, but those in her own she [[SuspiciouslySpecificDenial seems to think drop from the clouds]], or pretends so to think."
-->--'''Mary Boykin Chestnut,''' her famous diary entry about slave-owning families.

->'''Rhaenyra:''' It was my sons who were attacked and forced to defend themselves. Vile insults were levied against them.\\
'''Viserys:''' What insults?\\
'''Rhaenyra:''' The legitimacy of my sons' birth was put loudly to question.\\
'''Viserys:''' What? [...] ''[to Rhaenyra's brother Aegon]'' Where did you hear such calumnies? Aegon! Tell me the truth of it!\\
'''Aegon:''' We know, Father. Everyone knows. ''Just look at them.''
-->-- ''Series/HouseOfTheDragon'', "Driftmark"

->"Hey, honey, our baby's here. ''({{Beat}}; then with disappointment)'' [[CheatingWithTheMilkman He looks just like your boss]]."
-->--'''Random Who Father''' from ''Film/HowTheGrinchStoleChristmas2000''

->''"Liam, going to be a star. I'm no biologist, but he looks a little bit like my first sponsor. He and the ex were close."''
-->--'''Frank Gallagher''' about his son '''Liam''' with his ex-wife '''Monica Gallagher''', ''Series/ShamelessUS'' (1x01)
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