->'''NORTHERN BARBARIANS''' DWELL in the snowy part behind the northern MOUNTAIN range. They are very barbarous and tend to kilt strangers on sight. This is because the males spend their time in longhouses honing their fighting kills. It is not certain what their females do. Northern Barbarians do not feel the cold. They wear only a fur loincloth and copper wristguards. Their real clothing is their WEAPONS. But they are not stupid savages, only savages. They use skis and sledges for getting about in the snow and this, given the state of TRANSPORT generally, must be the equivalent of having invented the wheel. When Tourists visit here, they are advised to defeat all Barbarians who attack them. Then the Barbarians will respect them: it is the only Language they understand. The Tourists must then go on to prove the SHAMAN a fraud. After this, a Chieftain will offer the Tour anything it needs.
-->--''Literature/TheToughGuideToFantasyland''

-> Wide open and unguarded stand our gates,
-> And through them passes a wild motley throng.
-> Men from Volga and Tartar steppes.
-> Featureless figures from the Hoang-ho,
-> Malayan, Scythian, Teuton, Kelt and Slav,
-> Flying the Old World’s poverty and scorn;
-> These bringing with them unknown gods and rites,
-> Those tiger passions here to stretch their claws,
-> In street and alley what strange tongues are these,
-> Accents of menace in our ear,
-> Voices that once the Tower of Babel knew.
-->-- '''Thomas Bailey Aldrich -- "The Unguarded Gates"'''
----